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I originally planned a long description for this, but now that it's time, I'm not sure what I wanted to say. Guess I'll wing it.
We had multiple health scares throughout Doritos life, but it always turned out okay in the end. When she was recently diagnosed with kidney disease, I was upset, but I figured I'd treat it, like I've done with everything else. She'd get better, and we'd enjoy another few years together. She didn't get better. In fact, she rapidly crashed. We did what we could, but in the end, I could see that she was dying.
I had to make the decision to say goodbye to her this past Tuesday, and it has been so difficult for me. I thought I'd get to keep her around for another couple years... To add salt to the wound, I thought I'd have 5 final minutes with her after she was sedated, but before she was put to sleep. She was so weak that the sedative killed her. I wasn't able to tell her I love her and I'm sorry 200 more times..
16 years I've known this cat. Pets have come and gone in my life time, but none have anchored themselves in my heart like this kitty. She was my special one. She was often times the only light in my dark world. Now that her light is gone, I feel lost. I've grown so accustomed to having her around, now I have to learn to live without her again. The only comfort is in knowing that she lived a decently long life, and is no longer in pain.
Sleep easy, baby girl. I hope that wherever you are, you have a warm sun spot to lay in, a bottomless bowl of chicken, and endless supply of shoulder rubs. Thank you for the many years of unconditional love and companionship. I will always love you.
Some of my favorite Dorito art:
http://www.furaffinity.net/view/11216201/
http://www.furaffinity.net/view/10585616/
http://www.furaffinity.net/view/10423979/
http://www.furaffinity.net/view/7682193/
We had multiple health scares throughout Doritos life, but it always turned out okay in the end. When she was recently diagnosed with kidney disease, I was upset, but I figured I'd treat it, like I've done with everything else. She'd get better, and we'd enjoy another few years together. She didn't get better. In fact, she rapidly crashed. We did what we could, but in the end, I could see that she was dying.
I had to make the decision to say goodbye to her this past Tuesday, and it has been so difficult for me. I thought I'd get to keep her around for another couple years... To add salt to the wound, I thought I'd have 5 final minutes with her after she was sedated, but before she was put to sleep. She was so weak that the sedative killed her. I wasn't able to tell her I love her and I'm sorry 200 more times..
16 years I've known this cat. Pets have come and gone in my life time, but none have anchored themselves in my heart like this kitty. She was my special one. She was often times the only light in my dark world. Now that her light is gone, I feel lost. I've grown so accustomed to having her around, now I have to learn to live without her again. The only comfort is in knowing that she lived a decently long life, and is no longer in pain.
Sleep easy, baby girl. I hope that wherever you are, you have a warm sun spot to lay in, a bottomless bowl of chicken, and endless supply of shoulder rubs. Thank you for the many years of unconditional love and companionship. I will always love you.
Some of my favorite Dorito art:
http://www.furaffinity.net/view/11216201/
http://www.furaffinity.net/view/10585616/
http://www.furaffinity.net/view/10423979/
http://www.furaffinity.net/view/7682193/
Thanks for looking! Comments appreciated. :)
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Category Artwork (Digital) / General Furry Art
Species Housecat
Size 1100 x 850px
File Size 601.4 kB
Make the most of the time you have left with him, if you can. The night before I took Dorito in to be put to sleep, I set up pillows on the kitchen floor for me to lie on and I slept next to her all night. She was in such rough shape that she hardly acknowledged me, but I'd like to think that my presence was appreciated. The last few days she was with me, she did not purr at all. I wish I had known that I was spending my last few weeks with her so that I could've spent more time with her while she could express her appreciation. I hope your kitty pulls through. <3
As of 6pm tonight, he is peacefully asleep. I took him in for a check up, and his kidneys had gone into total failure...I wish I would have known today would be the day, but I just didn't want to believe it was so soon. We spent the last few hours at the hospital making him feel as loved and comfortable as possible...I share your sentiment in hoping he felt comfort in us being there with him.
In the end, at least I know he isn't struggling with the pain he's been in and won't have to any longer.
In the end, at least I know he isn't struggling with the pain he's been in and won't have to any longer.
I'm so sorry. ;_; Rest easy, buddy. If you want to talk, you can PM me. It doesn't make it hurt any less, but sometimes it's nice to be able to talk about it without burdening others. That's how I feel sometimes, at least. I'm afraid to talk about Dorito too much to friends/family because they either don't care, or they do, but don't want to think about it because it's sad.
I just lost a cat, too, and this picture speaks to me. I'd moved out of town a few months earlier for a job and the landlord wouldn't allow her to stay with me. I got to talk to her over the phone before she was put to sleep, but I would've killed for the chance to hold her and tell her goodbye in person as she passed. Thanks for making this, and I'm sorry about Dorito.
Oh noo! :((( Im so sorry *hugs*
when I lost my dog he was very old, couldn't walk very well, but at the vet in the room he still came up to see me and rest his head on my legs before they began the procedure. that made it ok for me it was a comfort. he knew i loved him and she knew you loved her. animals always know! Feel better
when I lost my dog he was very old, couldn't walk very well, but at the vet in the room he still came up to see me and rest his head on my legs before they began the procedure. that made it ok for me it was a comfort. he knew i loved him and she knew you loved her. animals always know! Feel better
For the last year of her almost 17 years of life, Poof slept against me, nestled between my chest and arm. Or against my thigh if I was on the computer. She was a stubborn cat that would headbutt for cuddles, and my last memory of her was her instant adoration.
She was the last of her sisters, I kinda got saddled with them, and loved them all. I still cry when I think about it.
Take care of yourself. Dorito was a wonderful kitty.
She was the last of her sisters, I kinda got saddled with them, and loved them all. I still cry when I think about it.
Take care of yourself. Dorito was a wonderful kitty.
Thank you for gifting us with a look into your emotions through your artwork. Just looking at this one picture alone shows just how much you loved Dorito. For anyone who has lost a loved pet knows that for as much as you loved them, they love you back just as much, if not more. My condolences to you. Sleep easy, Dorito.
We had to put down our cat last month due to bone cancer in his jaw. It was too advanced to really do anything by the time we caught it. We had him for seven years, and he was estimated to be five or six years old when we adopted him.
So I kind of know how you feel. We didn't have our kitty as long as you had yours, though, so it may be harder to equate, but they really are members of the family, and it's devastating to lose them. *hug*
So I kind of know how you feel. We didn't have our kitty as long as you had yours, though, so it may be harder to equate, but they really are members of the family, and it's devastating to lose them. *hug*
Reading this made me end up crying. I'm sorry to hear about your loss and hopefully she is still around for you when ever you need it. even if just Spiritually. The reason this made me cry is because i had the same thing happen with me.. 2 cats i had grown up with, and a dog. one cat unfortunately passed at the age of 13. the dog at 15. and then the other cat at the age of 18. even to this day i still miss them. And you got such beautiful art with her as well. i'm just sorry it had to end in such a way.
Aww, I'm sorry for your loss, I myself have a pet that we had put down a couple years ago, she was about the same age. She was a wonderful dog, so full of life in her younger years. Even as I write this, it brings back the sad, painful memory of when we had to say goodbye to her. *sniffles* I understand what you're going through, but just remember all the good times you had.
We lost our boy of 16 years last march, that hole many never heal. I found your picture very touching. When ever I see that another has lost a deeply beloved pet, it pulls at the edges.
They are not just animals. They leave their paw prints on our heart. The love, and the loss are no less for the fact they do not talk.
They are not just animals. They leave their paw prints on our heart. The love, and the loss are no less for the fact they do not talk.
We said goodbye to Felix back in February, also from renal failure. He was diagnosed on October and we hoped treatment would help but it quickly became obvious that one of the most amazing kitties we’ve ever known would soon be leaving us (at only 7yrs old). We’re sorry to hear of your loss but trust in your fuzzy to stay with you always, perhaps even to find his way back to you. About a month after we said goodbye, we found Bandit (a rescue from a month previous) who made it immediately evident we were his hoomans and he would be going home with us. Turns out he is virtually Felix in a new life and immediately settled (back?) into his place in our lives. Kitties have a way of doing that - becoming forever a part of your life.
It really hurts to see a pet for so long pass...it's the same as a family member passing.
My condolence for your loss.
The best way to heal from your loss is to give yourself the permission to feel the pain...you have to feel it...to heal it in other words.
But also give yourself the gift of remembering all the good times you had spent together. If you only remember and dwell in the last few moments of the her pain you can't heal and move on.
With that said, enjoy your favorite moments and memories with her and about her.
You will always miss her...but as long as you visit her in your favorite moments she will live on.
:3
My condolence for your loss.
The best way to heal from your loss is to give yourself the permission to feel the pain...you have to feel it...to heal it in other words.
But also give yourself the gift of remembering all the good times you had spent together. If you only remember and dwell in the last few moments of the her pain you can't heal and move on.
With that said, enjoy your favorite moments and memories with her and about her.
You will always miss her...but as long as you visit her in your favorite moments she will live on.
:3
Awww... *hugs tightly* I can very much relate to what you describe there. When I had to say goodbye to my cat several years ago I felt very much like you described for Dorito. And her situation too deteriorated rapidly adter FIV broke out with her.
My sincerest condolences to you, Ajna.
My sincerest condolences to you, Ajna.
I remember hearing about Dorito during some of your streams. Named for being found in a Dorito bag, if I recall.
I have three cats now, all only a few years old. Our oldest, Cleo is my little buddy. She will follow me around the house, sit on me when I'm on my computer and jump up on my bed early in the morning before I start my day. I will miss her greatly when she does go.
While I can't truly claim to feel your pain, I can sympathize with your situation. I know how I'd feel if I lost Cleo.
Fireball, another cat goes kitty crazy for the Nerf gun. She just loves to chase the foam darts and meows happily each time one is launched. I laugh the whole time we're playing.
As for Callie, she's the smallest and a classic middle child. She will just run up and attack the larger cats with a rowl and a growl, earning her the nickname Celtic Callie because she has a battle cry.
I'd miss any of them if I lost them. For weeks after I lost my husky, Tundra, I'd still look for him to greet me when I came home after work. It gets better, it passes. For now be sad, you're entitled
I have three cats now, all only a few years old. Our oldest, Cleo is my little buddy. She will follow me around the house, sit on me when I'm on my computer and jump up on my bed early in the morning before I start my day. I will miss her greatly when she does go.
While I can't truly claim to feel your pain, I can sympathize with your situation. I know how I'd feel if I lost Cleo.
Fireball, another cat goes kitty crazy for the Nerf gun. She just loves to chase the foam darts and meows happily each time one is launched. I laugh the whole time we're playing.
As for Callie, she's the smallest and a classic middle child. She will just run up and attack the larger cats with a rowl and a growl, earning her the nickname Celtic Callie because she has a battle cry.
I'd miss any of them if I lost them. For weeks after I lost my husky, Tundra, I'd still look for him to greet me when I came home after work. It gets better, it passes. For now be sad, you're entitled
I'm sorry, I know Dorito was really special to you and like family. You should know that you gave her the best shot you could and did your best to help her, it's just that kind of disease is particularly bad. I am sure you gave her a wonderful life, given that I can recall you mentioning all her health issues over the years and how you were worried or raising funds for her, and also from the various pieces of art I've seen her in. It is so sad to lose a friend and it won't be easy to get back on your feet, but you can remember that you had 16 amazing years by her side and that she loved you very much... she also got to meet your son and I am sure he will remember her.
Look after yourself.
Look after yourself.
At times like this the one thing that always comes to mind is the speech John Cleese gave at Graham Chapman's funeral. It sounds odd, but makes a lot of sense in context.
"Good riddance to him, the freeloading bastard. I hope he fries! And the reason I feel I must say this, is that he would never forgive me if I didn't."
We never had enough time, never enough warning, almost always realise far too late how serious things are, and it's never easy to pick up the pieces afterwards. And while it's not a lot, one thing that can sometimes help is to try to carry on their wishes, even as they themselves are no longer able to do so. John used the tragedy of his friend's death to carry on his work of undermining 'mindless good taste'. After my mother died I took up her habit of sponsoring third world children. As to what Dorito would want? I don't know, since I never meet her, but I could make some guesses...
At every stage of the life you shared together, during her youth, her middle age, and her twilight years, you were there for her, giving her warmth, safety, contentment and affection, and being generous with the kibble. For her you were the meaning of warmth, safety, contentment, affection, and generosity. And while it is hard to ask a cat anything, let alone get an answer, I feel it is safe to say that if she had been asked if she ever wanted you to stop being those things, the answer would always have been, "No."
I know things seem terrible and sad at the moment, or possibly just empty and cold, but perhaps, with the fullness of time, and when you are ready, you can once again be the kind of person Dorito knew you to be. Be warm, be safe in your own self, be happy and affectionate, and generous with the kibble. As much as we can be certain of anything in this life, it's probably what she would have wanted.
"Good riddance to him, the freeloading bastard. I hope he fries! And the reason I feel I must say this, is that he would never forgive me if I didn't."
We never had enough time, never enough warning, almost always realise far too late how serious things are, and it's never easy to pick up the pieces afterwards. And while it's not a lot, one thing that can sometimes help is to try to carry on their wishes, even as they themselves are no longer able to do so. John used the tragedy of his friend's death to carry on his work of undermining 'mindless good taste'. After my mother died I took up her habit of sponsoring third world children. As to what Dorito would want? I don't know, since I never meet her, but I could make some guesses...
At every stage of the life you shared together, during her youth, her middle age, and her twilight years, you were there for her, giving her warmth, safety, contentment and affection, and being generous with the kibble. For her you were the meaning of warmth, safety, contentment, affection, and generosity. And while it is hard to ask a cat anything, let alone get an answer, I feel it is safe to say that if she had been asked if she ever wanted you to stop being those things, the answer would always have been, "No."
I know things seem terrible and sad at the moment, or possibly just empty and cold, but perhaps, with the fullness of time, and when you are ready, you can once again be the kind of person Dorito knew you to be. Be warm, be safe in your own self, be happy and affectionate, and generous with the kibble. As much as we can be certain of anything in this life, it's probably what she would have wanted.
I'm so sorry for your loss. This made me cry, because I know the feeling. Losing a pet is as hard or harder than losing any other family member or friend. In some ways they are better than us. They are like angels on earth, there is no evil or malice in their hearts... Like anyone who passes, they live on inside those they touched. She will always be with you.
Sleep well, little Dorito. May you watch (and purr) over Tee forever.
Tee, i've been through this more often then I like... I love all my kitties. To have lost so many myself makes me unable to resist crying when I see posts like this. I empathize. More than I want to, in fact.
I am so sorry for your loss. I hope you can find a light in that dark world once more. We all need at least a small glimmer.
Tee, i've been through this more often then I like... I love all my kitties. To have lost so many myself makes me unable to resist crying when I see posts like this. I empathize. More than I want to, in fact.
I am so sorry for your loss. I hope you can find a light in that dark world once more. We all need at least a small glimmer.
I am so sorry for your loss :( I recent suffered a loss of my own, an older husky I had adopted a few years ago. She was always a slightly calmer, less energetic individual and she definitely enjoyed her independance. About a month ago I realized that she had taken a turn for the worse where she was not even wanting to go for a walk on her leash, and I wanted to schedule an appointment with the vet to see what comfort I could bring her. I thought I had a few days, but she didn't give me that. I came home last from work one night to find she had passed, alone in the yard. I'm not sure if she suffered during that time, but it broke my heart that nobody was with her in her final moments. I still suffer from depression and it's been a month to this day. The hardest thing to think about is having to change routine and people constantly offering me dogs, specifically the same breed. I know your pain, maybe not quite at the same depth but I know <3 It's going to be hard for a long, long while, and the pain will never fully go away. Just try to remember the good times and please don't blame yourself about her health and how you could have done better. She lived a long and happy life with her family, and that's the main thing you can focus on during this difficult time <3
I have had a similar experience with a pet who passed away that I wished I could give a proper goodbye to. Joe was a Cardigan Welsh Corgi who was whip-smart (to a point where you could have sworn he was testing you) but also thoroughly respectful and polite.
After his 13th birthday on a very hot midsummer day I picked him up from the kennel after my family & I had been out of town, and took him home. He had a weak and enlarged heart due to his age, and was in distress following the trip back presumably due to the fact that the temperature was very high, our AC was being repaired, and he had a double coat (plus the separation anxiety following us leaving him at the kennel).
I was frankly dismissive of him and his usual "old dog antics". He was in and out of the house to use the bathroom constantly, on a strict diet to keep his weight down and his kidneys functioning (so begging for table scraps was absolutely out of the question). Later that evening his heart gave out and he passed away, in my mother's arms while I was having some leftover Chinese in the adjacent dining area. I came over as he drew his last breath but felt no meaningful way to apologize for how dismissive I had been of him as he was already gone. Joe lived on his own terms, and departed on them.
I still think about it every now and again when I go to visit my father and see the various things we made for our departed pet. A dog run that Tikki (a tiny Shih-Tzu/Pomeranian mix) now occupies, a cage that used to be his but has found other use in the almost five intervening years since his passing. I have forgiven myself for that since. Death is never convenient and things are always left unsaid, and I think he would have understood that. I loved him all the same.
After his 13th birthday on a very hot midsummer day I picked him up from the kennel after my family & I had been out of town, and took him home. He had a weak and enlarged heart due to his age, and was in distress following the trip back presumably due to the fact that the temperature was very high, our AC was being repaired, and he had a double coat (plus the separation anxiety following us leaving him at the kennel).
I was frankly dismissive of him and his usual "old dog antics". He was in and out of the house to use the bathroom constantly, on a strict diet to keep his weight down and his kidneys functioning (so begging for table scraps was absolutely out of the question). Later that evening his heart gave out and he passed away, in my mother's arms while I was having some leftover Chinese in the adjacent dining area. I came over as he drew his last breath but felt no meaningful way to apologize for how dismissive I had been of him as he was already gone. Joe lived on his own terms, and departed on them.
I still think about it every now and again when I go to visit my father and see the various things we made for our departed pet. A dog run that Tikki (a tiny Shih-Tzu/Pomeranian mix) now occupies, a cage that used to be his but has found other use in the almost five intervening years since his passing. I have forgiven myself for that since. Death is never convenient and things are always left unsaid, and I think he would have understood that. I loved him all the same.
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