It's been a few years since you've been gone
There's been a few tears, but that was years and years ago
Yeah, I grew up to be exactly what you wanted
Yeah, I been living out the dream that you dreamt up
It's been a few years with more to come
It's been a few years since I've felt sure of what I want
And I woke up today and found that you were waiting here for me and I thought
Whoa, old friend, it's bittersweet
Whoa, how could you do this to me?
How could you do this to me?
Yeah

'Cos you are not who you think you are
There's no grain on these brown eyes
But they can be green if they really want
And I can bend your words
but they say exactly what hurts the most
But silence is better than fake laughs or faking were always up
Loose grip
The world bends around you
And living through cracked screens
We fold down to what we want
Out of love
We talk through lines, we're made of smoke
And just in time, we drift away
Diffusing light, confusing times
Growing up, or cascading down?
Cascading down
I'm hurting now

But change comes slow
If you hate what's in your head, the fuck would you speak your mind?
In search of lost time
Just 21 so I'm young and I'm stupid
Only 16, yeah, I think you should've known
I think you fucked me up
I think, I think you fucked me up
And I've got nothing to say to you

It's been a few years and I've moved on
Couldn't make it disappear, oh I tried so hard to be strong
But I grew up today and faced that I'm not just lonely
Don't feel much better but I guess that it's a start


I guess December and November really showed it. I haven't been doing very well, it seems like at every turn i keep doing something wrong, i get a chance to be happy and it's all taken from me and crashed down in an instant. it went from 2017 starting great... everything seemed to be going great, to now this. what happened? what did i do wrong? why did i deserve this? As the year winds down to an end, and it got closer to that last day... you could see it all drain, all my inspiration, all my work... just drained from me, this piece ended up being less based on a song, and more based on my emotions. i feel lost confused and stuck. like every turn now will lead to a crash. and its not like i don't have anyone who cares... cause i know damn well i've got people who care, and i'm determined to not give up, even if i wanna give up ill force myself not to, cause whats the point of giving up when there's so much left. the first step is always admitting things. and here i am admitting it, For now, Maybe not for a while. I am not okay... But i will press on.

Start end


Speedpaint: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nxLGsX7N4i0