-= Fiber Optic Bundles of Joy=-
[[A PATREON series. No more FOBoJ will be released in the immediate future, but tune into Patreon to get a hold of The Rendering Pit, already 20 stories in, IMMEDIATELY]]
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In Today's story werewolfNL 's Thaminga concludes her stunning rescue of a whale of an otter that's been abducted! How will our tale conclude? Read on, to find out!

This chapter is written by rabidbadger and illustrated by me! Thank you very much werewolfNL and JoeTheEnglishman for sponsoring these chapters of FOBoJ! Part 16 is on Patreon, and will be released onto FA later.

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Thaminga found hirself feeling just a little odd around the lap as shi watched a curiously hefty gazelle and an equally oddly svelte hippo engage in what looked like a classic sumo match. This place’s appeal was growing more obvious – it was the entertainment and chaos equivalent of hard drugs. Endlessly potent, just leaving one wanting more no matter how intense the dose. Shi found it a great deal headier than the wine the bunny had ordered over, and could tell the rabbit was mainlining it.

Shi wasn’t at all sure shi blamed the little technicolor lapine for the power trip given the circumstances.

“So, you’ve been a bit coy about what exactly you want me to do.”

The bunny’s grin looked distinctly predatory, tilted and sharp, watching the gazelle heft the hippo right over her shoulders and bellow into the air.

“Haven’t finished this rush yet – I dunno what I’ll want until I do.”

She downed a glass there, the red was nice – fragrant - the bunny’s cheeks were changing color slowly anyway so it was impossible to really tell if she was getting drunk or not. Thaminga doubted shi could, heck shi had to remember to form some taste receptors to enjoy the stuff. Maybe Red could help hir figure that out at some point-

“Well, that’s not true – I know what I want but it has to be fair.”

Thaminga’s smile was a thin thing, shi knew perfectly well too, but-

“I want to overturn the ruling from earlier and claim eminent domain on your ass. Literally. But even pirates need some kind of excuse.”

Blunt, that was. It left Thaminga blinking slowly, usually there was some kind of game to this. Granted there probably still would be in the literal sense, but something that brazen?

“Well at least I know where we’re starting from. Couldn’t I just purchase Joseph back from you?”

That led to rolled eyes and a quick glance, from Thaminga’s eyes, to the gold hanging off the bunny, then back to the fight.

“Right.”

There was an uproar from the crowd – Thaminga looked out and saw the hippo straddling the downed gazelle’s face, along with faint traces of some kind of rumbling in the air. The bunny stood up again, teeth bared in a grin, arm held out – and thumb down once more. Thaminga found hirself keeping hir attention on the rabbit rather than the show though, this might just actually be dangerous.

The cheering and noise intensified rather than quieted, but the bunny stepped away from her seat rather than returning to the action – she also motioned for Thaminga to follow. That had been what shi was waiting for, but Thaminga questioned the wisdom of going inside. Just a little anyway. Still, shi had a job to do – had rewards to consider. The liquid creature of many talents (and new ones being added to the list daily) stood, pausing just by Joseph’s still slowly heaving and clearly drugged form. Shi put hir hands against his side, which was all shi could reach. Watching hir fingers sink effortlessly into the massive bulk of his left ass cheek, the other hand sliding on contact with the aggressively applied swath of lubricant – among other things. It made hir fingers tingle, and left a buzzing sensation in the back of hir head somewhere – it also left behind a couple of shiny, golden fingerprints.

Not something shi had time to dwell on though. Thaminga rushed off the next few steps after hir hostess, descending some stairs that quickly and inelegantly segued from red carpet covered to open metal grating. There was some shift back as they reached the bottom, but it was haphazard – old shag carpeting, fine woven rugs, a couple of rubber mats – all ringed in once elegant scarlet curtains that were frayed, stained – the floor covered in wine bottles, patches, mysterious dark spots, and a small mountain of multicolored pillows off at the far end.

The bunny headed straight for the pillows, and dug in them until she’d found a fresh wine bottle, shedding a handful of the heaviest pieces of her jewelery. Thaminga on the other hand lingered nearer the entrance, staring down at a pile of spent transdermal patches and an empty hypo, then raising her brow to hir hostess.

“Well I can think of worse places than a boudoir to do this kind of thing.”

Hir hostess took a pull from the bottle, then sprawled herself out into the cushions.

“So here’s the deal shiny butt. I get bored easily these days. You can have the otter that could dam a river with just his ass if you can shake the boredom off me. All this stuff here is nice, but there’s a certain lack of… creativity.”

Thaminga adopted an easy sort of smile, flexing hir wings – stirring up the curtains a little. Shi swung hir hips a little with each step, let hir ‘dress’ grow tight around the waist and leave fewer secrets between hir and the bunny.

“So, the ennui of the rich and powerful is setting in, you’re finding yourself bored – running out of ideas – staring down extremes that might be a bit dangerous. Like your pet out there.”

The bunny did adopt a bit of a smile for that.

“That was fun, desperate – but fun. Had to get some muscle quick on the way out of a station that was going to hell. He had muscles, and I had a couple convenient drugs on hand, which he seems to still enjoy thoroughly.”

Thaminga turned hir head briefly toward their box seats again – shi felt something out there, disconnected tingling and fizzing.

In the boudoir? The horned, winged golden thing approached the rabbit once more, lowering hirself into the same nest of cushions, one hand at hir side between them as a respectful invitation.

“But you yourself have been avoiding going too heavy into chemical ‘adventures’ I see.”

The smile broke, leaving the colorful rabbit looking not just bored, but a bit weary – even sad. Thaminga wasn’t unfamiliar with the expression, but shi was surprised to see it on someone who wasn’t on the ass-end of decades of debauchery. Shi allowed hirself to entertain the idea of empathizing here, just a little.

“Grew up poor, scraping by on trading stations – had a shop on one finally even when a bunch of bonkers robots wrecked the place. Still, poor means I knew what that crap did to people. Over here? They just gene mod it into themselves for fun, like the cow.”

Thaminga’s brow narrowed a bit.

“So the milk was-“

“Narcotic, yes – I mean, they’re cats, so they had half a foot in that one to begin with, and trust me they had nothing pleasant in mind if they won either.”

The look on the bunny’s face stayed largely the same, it was half a mask – one Thaminga suspected she wasn’t aware she was wearing.

“Are you entirely sure this is where you want to be?”

The question looked like it shocked something in that fuzzy, multi-colored head. She looked up to Thaminga, unsure of herself. Vulnerable.

“Because you may want to reconsider it. For one thing? I left a streak of myself on your pet out there, and my AI partner has been busy reverse engineering that stuff in his bloodstream for the last ten minutes.”

The eyes went wider, and far less ambiguous in expression.

“What.”

Thaminga adopted a sharper smile than earlier, something shi saved for special victories.

“Red’s proved himself quite competent so far – if mischievous. Dunno how soon scaly up there will take to get his head back on straight, but you might not want to be here when he does.”

The bunny stood, but shakily at best. Eyeballing the far end of the chamber – there was only the one way out, right past her ‘pet’ – logic said waiting was a mistake, but fear did funny things to people, and logic was usually its first victim. She took a shaky step, or tried to – only to find Thaminga’s curiously warm hand on her shoulder.

“I don’t think this heartless debutante lifestyle suits you too well, cute thing. I’m sure it looked shiny from the gutter, but I’d recommend you run real fast, real far, and then stop to smell the flowers when you get wherever that is.”

The little multi-colored thing looked up at Thaminga, unable to tell if the bizarre woman was being kind or had just doomed her – or both? Either way the hesitation persisted only a moment more before she took off up the stairs leaving Thaminga’s hand hovering in the air.

Said hand had the now broken chain with the crystal on it between two fingers.

“Well, there’s the easy part done. I don’t hear any screaming or squishing yet, so…”

Briefly, Thaminga considered simply pulling the crystal inside hirself – weighing the idea against wearing it – one was obvious to onlookers, the other? Well, shi had no idea what was in the thing, what kind of traps, how vulnerable shi might be to written code at this point. In the end, shi decided no – it could stay on the outside. Resting against a hardened and offline patch of hirself just above hir chest.

Shi took the wine bottle up from the floor, then began the lazy march back whence shi came. Finding some confusion among those above. There was no sign of the bunny, either the little thing was fast, or slippery, or both. Joseph and the draconic fellow were still occupying the booth though, the otter exactly as shi had left him – the ebon scaled behemoth sitting in a heap rubbing his head and muttering. More so when Thaminga walked into view.

“Y-you… yer- You. You’re the sh- the sss- the same. Shade. S’ the stuff on my hand. Won’t come off. Shiny.”

Thaminga glanced down – the scaly brute’s fingers were coated in a little of hirself, as were the places shi’d touched deliberately. Shi still felt them, little afterthoughts in hir awareness.

The draconic gentleman grunted, shouldering himself up the wall of the booth, letting out a heavy and acrid breath that left Thaminga wondering if the man had gone so far as to mod a breath weapon into himself. His focus looked to be slowly returning either way – and with that came an instantaneous flash of anger.

“The bunny!”

Thaminga’s lip curled a little.

“Just missed her. Darted off into the crowd I think.”

The man’s full height was a bit intimidating when shi saw it – seven feet plus, chiseled scale-covered form, and of course the third arm hanging off his waist. He took two heavy steps to the side of the place, looking like he was ready to just dive in blindly after her – then stopped. Reason was fighting its way back to Glaurec, slowly but surely. He grunted, growled really – then glanced at Thaminga.

Then at Joseph’s ass, and promptly back to Thaminga.

“…I need time... Where the hell am I anyway?”

Thaminga paced lazily up to Joseph, looking at the poor otter’s face – he’d fallen asleep at some point it seemed – shi found hirself wondering now how long it had been since the gigantic man had time to sleep.

“Liar’s Palace, in the pirate casino station.”

Shi didn’t get to see his reaction to that, Thaminga found hirself too busy with Joseph. Shi was looking the man mountain over, thinking things through – shi only had half the helium shi’d left with, and there was no knowing if it would be enough to let hir move the hovering otter. Maglev got weaker the further it was from a surface after all, and none of the other gas pods were-

Thaminga blinked slowly.

The other gas pods were all heavier than air, and compressed – shi just hadn’t noticed the weight. That had two immediate results – shi located them, able to ‘feel’ the labels and know which was which – and readied to eject the little buggers, then shi spoke.

“…Hey! I need a favor, and I figure this isn’t much to ask for helping you get back to your senses. You look, uh – huge. Can you toss my friend and I in, well mostly-“

Thaminga squinted and looked out in the distance, zeroing in on the pool -the most familiar landmark shi had.

“Roughly that way? I’m gonna add some extra float to the maglev, we just need to clear the arena for the most part.”

There was another of those heavy exhales, and Thaminga was certain shi smelled the fumes of a strong caustic agent on them. The man was definitely at least as dangerous as he looked. He was also nodding though.

“Aye, I can – then I guess I get to try and figure out what the hell happened.”

Thaminga handed the man the wine bottle, then slowly walked to Joseph’s front side. Shi hoped he’d stay resting, and he did manage to keep snoring as shi gently slid hirself up. Feeling even hir slight weight push deep dimples into the otter’s pudgy form, spreading hirself out flat atop the slowly floating dome of his gut.

Glaurec still seemed a trifle unsteady when Thaminga looked again, before shi lost sight of the man as he stepped behind Joseph. A proper grip was in order, one that involved letting hir arms slowly distend lower around the otter’s underside. So much flesh underneath, Thaminga had to carefully paw about to find hir own other extremities there, finding the act of controlling hir own arms and legs a trifle difficult to coordinate when shi estimated them to be six feet long, each, at minimum. When shi did manage to get a grip on hirself, literally, shi heard some muttering from Glaurec’s side of the otter butt.

“Err, what was that, sir?”

There was a pause, one that shi could swear smelled of embarrassment.

“…Nothing, miss. Brace yourself, I’m doing this.”

Thaminga was about as well braced as could be. When shi felt the otter lift up, something that finally seemed to be rousing Joseph out of his much needed nap, she worked the remaining heavy gas capsules through hirself, easing them to hir extremities, feeling little channels open inside herself like enormous arteries with just one blood cell each and hir entire body playing the heart.

There was a grunt, and a heave – Thaminga let the capsules go, hearing a scattering of surprisingly loud clinks as they struck the ground (but stayed quite solid) before air started to rush around hir, a disconnected and floaty sensation taking root down in the center of hir body – for excellent reasons. On some level, it reminded hir of carnival rides, rollercoasters, that kind of thing – the way one’s stomach lifted up before the drop – but in hir case there really was a little ball in hir belly trying hard to float.

Thaminga watched as the arena shrunk swiftly, dozens of faces becoming a sea of little low-res people milling about and pointing. Shi knew what shi was waiting for, watching as Joseph’s eyes fluttered open and he began looking around himself in stupefied disbelief. He said something, shi knew that, but what it was slipped past hir ears amid the rush of wind and all the focus on timing. That little feeling of the ball in hir belly dropping as their trajectory hit its crest – Thaminga knew shi had to be precise now – this wasn’t about lift so much as drift.

Little diamond-hard points, just like before. Shi pinched them into being inside hirself, knotted tightly around the sphere of helium, feeling its casing crack and peel – making sure hir underbelly was hard enough that the pieces didn’t shoot through hir and into the much more vulnerable Joseph, who was left staring even harder as Thaminga’s world collapsed in on itself with a thundering ‘thwoomp’ sound, followed by a gentle creaking.

Thaminga doubted shi would ever get used to the sensation, and shi was thankful for that. Pulled and pushed on from a half dozen directions at once, like shi was being worked on by the grandest masseuse ever born. There was a hazy, pink/gold buzz in hir mind that seemed to pool in hir limp noodle (carbon fiber cable) arms, in the golden parchment-thin (industrial grade) expanse of hir skin. The pressure had spread through hir in an instant, first leaving hir belly pressing tight against Joseph and pushing them so close face to face shi had briefly considered kissing the blubbery swimmer. When hir arms gave way some Thaminga pulled upward, floating just a foot or two above the bulky swell of hir cargo (well, one of hir two cargoes).

Shi wasn’t actually sure how big shi’d just gotten, the same size as on the way up shi assumed – but looking side to side just showed spherical golden expanse, the horizon of hir own chest and the bulbous swells where hir arms used to sit hid the rest hirself from sight. They must, Thaminga thought, look a little like an ancient hot air balloon – just with a pair of unclad asses instead of balloon and basket. Shi was also gratified to note shi’d probably gotten the timing just about right – they were descending, slowly – but moving at a steady pace away from the Liar’s Palace and out over the main marketplace.

Where they were going to land was less certain, but one works with what they have. Joseph finally managed to blink his way through at least enough of the initial shock and confusion to speak up at hir while they pleasantly drifted. He sounded as close to polite as he could manage under the circumstances.

“Err, hullo again. Looking ah, shiny an’ such still I see. What’s my arse doing danglin’ an’ on display fer the whole station, again, if you’ve got any clue lass?”

Thaminga giggled just a bit, there was an odd euphoria to being this size – so round and taut, the attempts to move hir hips and shoulders just causing little bouncing sensations complete with rubbery squeaks. Shi did have answers though, at least some of them.

“The AI called in a rescue – your ass had gotten itself pressganged by a pirate queen for her pet. Kind of anticlimactic though I’m afraid. My suggestion? Just enjoy the ride home.”

Joseph turned his head, as much as he was able anyway – Thaminga could see his neck and cheek bunch up into tighter folds and creases before he got very far.

“Story of my bloody life lately.”

The otter looked resigned, although not deeply unhappy – nor quite as relieved as one might expect. Thaminga would’ve felt more for him had shi not been too wrapped up in relishing how the station’s artificial air currents were massaging the thin, taut expanse of her body. They danced and tickled across hir surfaces, leaving Thaminga bunching places up – making little imperfections – giving them something to play on.

It all felt so nice shi really didn’t pay much attention to anything else until shi began floating them by the enormous central monitor in the market, and saw hirself.

The hot-air balloon comparison was accurate enough, Thaminga’s colossal spheroid body was three times the size of Joseph, marred only by bulges where hir arms and legs would’ve been were they not serving time as support straps. Indeed, the only real features to be seen were hir (still cute) puffy cheeked face, and the gently indented line at the ‘peak’ of her body which, under normal circumstances, would’ve been what shi sat on. Shi’d only been this large briefly on the way up, if shi’d even been that big – and out in space shi’d been… well, out in space. Not a lot of spectators.

Unlike here.

Thaminga could actually make out the fingers pointing, the cameras recording, from up there – damned good visual acuity for the artificial eyes shi was holding together. Which just meant shi was finding it easy to be all the more conscious of how huge this helium had hir body, and that it was probably another ten minutes or so before shi’d clear the majority of the crowds and could think about landing.

Joseph had apparently seen the screen as well.

“Bah, least las’ time I was showin’ my posterior off ta tha entire damn universe it was getting’ paid for…”

Thaminga felt her cheeks grow warm and knew they’d turned just a bit rosy, apparently blushing was a hard reaction to lose – even in a synthetic body.

“W-well, maybe the fox figured that out – I guess we can ask when we land. Eventually.”

That thought didn’t seem terribly likely to either of them, but it was the one they left off on to pass the rest of the trip in silent embarrassment and resignation respectively. Thaminga at one point thought she caught a glance of something fuzzy, colorful, and afraid dashing between legs as best it could but it was too brief to be sure. The nearest patch of empty hull floor was approaching though, and that called for action.

A tiny hole was how shi started it, just a little pinpoint by what would ordinarily be hir left shoulder – both letting them descend a trifle faster, and steering them just a bit toward that side. The process repeated itself a handful of times, each one altering their trajectory gently, and their speed noticeably as gravity caught up with them bit by bit – which it did right until about ten yards from the hull.

Thaminga let out another pocket of helium, starting to feel distinctly empty – hazy even, stretched out and weak. The notion of gathering hirself back together didn’t manage to penetrate until hir extremities felt cool metal and the buzzing distortion of the maglev – they landed, and shi felt hir body fully deflate – leaving hir draped over the bulbous otter like a tarp. Shi took a slow breath, filling hirself just a little – slowly willing hir mass to recollect itself, though while shi was at it someone broke through the crowd and began approaching – someone in a raggedy shawl, who made heavy metallic clinking sounds with each step.

“Not a bad showing girl. Made the screen twice since you got here, and from what I’m seeing sparkling around your neck you were successful to boot.”

Thaminga blinked slowly, fluttering hir wings a little, slowly pulling hir arms back into their proper length. The right one worked out a little faster, the left feeling sluggish as it passed under the maglev plate below Joseph’s ass. It only took the one to peel the pendant from hir neck though, letting it fall into the possum’s waiting, artificial hand.

“Excellent… have fun pulling yourself together dear, I’ve things to do.”

Another sluggish breath, shi felt hir chest regain some definition – hir legs were squeaking and creaking as they dragged themselves along Joseph’s belly. The more of hir mass was back in one place, the more Thaminga found hirself slowly sliding down the otter’s abdomen to the ground, landing in a slightly loose heap just before the largest part of his belly, feeling each inhale help hir along to regaining the right proportions and surface tension.

The glow of scarlet light that bloomed on Joseph’s belly wasn’t entirely unexpected.

“Nice job up there – seriously. Good call with the bunny and making it someone else’s problem to work things out. Plus, taking your time on the way down let me analyze the crystal some. Mostly blackmail material in there, for the record.”

Thaminga adopted a smirk that was mostly benign – mostly.

“So, you got everyone’s butts exposed to the whole place again, got your people back, freed a slave or two, and got paid for doing it – kind of. I’m sure you’re happy with this outcome.”

“Quite so! So, I believe you wanted to talk about hierarchies, possible positions open, that kind of thing? Though you may wish to know I’ve got a large, scaly man also vying for some kind of spot on the crew.”

Thaminga’s eyes narrowed at the smiling, shiny fox face.

“Has anyone ever told you you’re a little too fond of your own intelligence? Also, I’m going to finish laying here and recuperating thank you. We can talk afterward, and you’re buying dinner if we’re talking shop.”

Red’s face nodded, trying to look conceding.

“Fair play, madam shiny pants. Fair play.”

***

Sometime earlier-

Glaurec looked down at his hand, at the golden slick goo on it – the stuff was ludicrously clingy. It also tingled in ways that worried him just a touch – his immune system was top notch, but he had no idea what kind of tech this was. That girl had been made of this stuff it looked like. Plus, it was moving. Stretching into thin lines, thicker ones, then boxes, and-

The scaled behemoth blinked. A gold QR code, on his thumb?

He turned, looking at the comm panel on the side of the booth. He glanced at his thumb briefly once more, then held it up to the screen and pressed down – finding himself promptly looking into the eyes of a smug looking young fox.

“Hey there! I hear you’re looking for some information on where you’ve been for the last while and what the blazes happened to you on that station. I think I can help, and maybe make an offer – interested?”

Glaurec exhaled, leaving a thin fog on the screen in the process. This didn’t exactly sit right – too easy, he thought. Still, he could handle himself if he was careful, right?

“Alright. Talk.”