
Tusker was wandering around down a darkened corridor when it opened out into a rather large room, with more of the glass display cases scattered around the edges. However, it wasn't the display cases that caught his eye. In the middle of the room, and dramatically lit by small spotlights from underneath was the mounted skeleton of a massive creature, two or three times his height and many times his length. He fell instantly in lust for the creature, whatever it was, was reptilian and utterly gorgeous. On a small plinth beside the large concrete pad it was mounted on, was an illustration of what it must have appeared like when it was alive.
It had two pitifully short, stunted little arms, but that body...and those massively muscled thighs. Not to mention a tail that went all the way up. Although it only had two eyes, the rest of its face was stunningly beautiful. A mouthful of teeth the size of Vanguard horns, and craggy features that would make the most attractive Vanguard pale in comparison. Quite unable to take his eyes off the magnificent creature, Tusker activated the communications function of his datapad.
"Hrrr, it is imperative for you to observe what I have discovered," he breathed into the datapad, his voice filled with awe. "Track me to this location."
Swiftly converging from three different directions, the other Vanguard sprinted into the room but stopped short when they saw what had completely captivated Tusker's attention. Slowly approaching him, they all clustered around the plinth. Having difficulty tearing his eyes away, Crater consulted his own datapad.
"The primitive computer near the entrance contained a certain amount of useful data regarding the purpose of this structure," he rumbled quietly. "It is called a museum, and contains much historical and cultural information. The humans use it as a form of entertainment and education. It is not the library you seek, however it may still be useful for our purposes." He stared up again with awe at the fossilized skeletal remains.
"What is this magnificent, beautiful creature, hrrr?" Tusker reached up to the cold stone of the fossilized skull, barely able to reach it with his extended talons even stretched out like he was.
The other two warriors had spread out and were examining the contents of the display cases around the edges of the room. Many more fossilized pieces of different reptilian species were in the displays, along with information regarding their history, and illustrations of what the humans believed they appeared like when they were still alive.
Crater reluctantly returned his attention to his datapad and quickly tapped away. "This is a dinosaur. The humans call it a 'Tyrannosaurus Rex', which they translate as 'Terrible Lizard'."
"Hrrr, terribly attractive is what it is," Tusker was by now sporting a noticeable bulge underneath his skinsuit where his genital pouch was located.
Embarrassed, Crater edged away slightly, hissing with annoyance when the young warrior wiped some of the copious drool from his lower jaw and shook it off, some of it ending up splattered across the screen on his datapad, before it dripped off in long, slimy strings.
"Hrrr, obtain a room, you two," he growled, before backing away to study some of the other exhibits in the room.
Keep it in yer pants, Tusker!
The beautiful
ives proves yet again just how talented he is at bringing my words to live in his own, lovely style... Thank you so very much, Mr. Ives. You continue to rock my world with the results from your talented fingers.
It had two pitifully short, stunted little arms, but that body...and those massively muscled thighs. Not to mention a tail that went all the way up. Although it only had two eyes, the rest of its face was stunningly beautiful. A mouthful of teeth the size of Vanguard horns, and craggy features that would make the most attractive Vanguard pale in comparison. Quite unable to take his eyes off the magnificent creature, Tusker activated the communications function of his datapad.
"Hrrr, it is imperative for you to observe what I have discovered," he breathed into the datapad, his voice filled with awe. "Track me to this location."
Swiftly converging from three different directions, the other Vanguard sprinted into the room but stopped short when they saw what had completely captivated Tusker's attention. Slowly approaching him, they all clustered around the plinth. Having difficulty tearing his eyes away, Crater consulted his own datapad.
"The primitive computer near the entrance contained a certain amount of useful data regarding the purpose of this structure," he rumbled quietly. "It is called a museum, and contains much historical and cultural information. The humans use it as a form of entertainment and education. It is not the library you seek, however it may still be useful for our purposes." He stared up again with awe at the fossilized skeletal remains.
"What is this magnificent, beautiful creature, hrrr?" Tusker reached up to the cold stone of the fossilized skull, barely able to reach it with his extended talons even stretched out like he was.
The other two warriors had spread out and were examining the contents of the display cases around the edges of the room. Many more fossilized pieces of different reptilian species were in the displays, along with information regarding their history, and illustrations of what the humans believed they appeared like when they were still alive.
Crater reluctantly returned his attention to his datapad and quickly tapped away. "This is a dinosaur. The humans call it a 'Tyrannosaurus Rex', which they translate as 'Terrible Lizard'."
"Hrrr, terribly attractive is what it is," Tusker was by now sporting a noticeable bulge underneath his skinsuit where his genital pouch was located.
Embarrassed, Crater edged away slightly, hissing with annoyance when the young warrior wiped some of the copious drool from his lower jaw and shook it off, some of it ending up splattered across the screen on his datapad, before it dripped off in long, slimy strings.
"Hrrr, obtain a room, you two," he growled, before backing away to study some of the other exhibits in the room.
Keep it in yer pants, Tusker!
The beautiful

Category Artwork (Digital) / Muscle
Species Reptilian (Other)
Size 759 x 1280px
File Size 86.2 kB
I am a math weenie. I took advanced math and won awards. I wasn't picked on because I couldn't fit in the lockers :P Just display tissues and you'll at least be thoughtful if not decorative. Jamie likes my aesthetic thus far. He says he trusts me with design. I can not be blamed when everything is replaced with sea foam green!
Ugh, the bowl hair-cut is for parents who want their kids to die of shame at school.
And that was NATURAL, not neutral Certain bold, bright colours can be very applicable in certain situations. I want to build a specialised gaming room in the new house as well, something I can decorate with outrageous designs, lighting etc. That would be COOL.
And that was NATURAL, not neutral Certain bold, bright colours can be very applicable in certain situations. I want to build a specialised gaming room in the new house as well, something I can decorate with outrageous designs, lighting etc. That would be COOL.
Well, lots of in-wall wiring at any rate. Sound-proofing, definitely, but I hadn't considered acoustic panels on the ceiling. Walls will be covered in prints of the artwork I've commissioned, nicely framed.
And colour LED lighting around the perimeter... Ooooooh, I like that.
We'll have a good home cinema, but probably not to the same extent that it will have its own room and seating. That's a little overkill. Perhaps you would make a good interior decorator!
And colour LED lighting around the perimeter... Ooooooh, I like that.
We'll have a good home cinema, but probably not to the same extent that it will have its own room and seating. That's a little overkill. Perhaps you would make a good interior decorator!
Yeah but chemical weapons can become unstable over time, or lose their effectiveness and potency. I would still go for the nuclear thing - I'd take mutating over accidental poisoning or dying in a pool of my own vomit while being eaten alive by something invisible to the naked eye.
Oh dear. The tour guide would have a hard time explaining that one to the school children.
"And here is the prize of our museum, the king of the dinosaurs himself! This skeleton was found in the...something seems to be on the femur there. It looks wet...kind of sticky..oh dear."
"And here is the prize of our museum, the king of the dinosaurs himself! This skeleton was found in the...something seems to be on the femur there. It looks wet...kind of sticky..oh dear."
"A mime walks in to a Vanguard bar..." What happened?
The Vanguard who ate him said "This tasted a little funny..." http://www.instantrimshot.com
Dangling, external genitalia are for the weak!
The Vanguard who ate him said "This tasted a little funny..." http://www.instantrimshot.com
Dangling, external genitalia are for the weak!
And that's the great thing about that rimshot site - instantly converts any lame quip or joke to spontaneous laughter and joy and sparkle unicorns and rainbows and fluffy kittens...
And definitely the weak. If you were effectively nekkid and going into a close-quarters fight that you knew was deadly serious, would you want some easily damaged, potentially crippling dangly bits that your enemy could easily target?
And definitely the weak. If you were effectively nekkid and going into a close-quarters fight that you knew was deadly serious, would you want some easily damaged, potentially crippling dangly bits that your enemy could easily target?
They say a picture is worth a thousand words, right?
http://www.cumm.co.uk/cocks/sebbanner.htm
http://www.cumm.co.uk/cocks/sebbanner.htm
If you smirk in a forest and nobody is around to hear it, does it still make a sound?
And you make my panties wet,
v-taar
And you make my panties wet,

You got a deal, but only if I can watch
jkman apply it and the whipped cream to you after that 100 mile bike ride...

There are too many insane drivers, pedestrians and other cyclists on the road. They give me rage. At least there are slightly less out in the wilderness. Still rage-worthy, but just less of them. Not to mention you have a much better chance of landing in a bush if you crap off in the wilderness.
But you just have to watch out for a particularly dangerous species of flora that tends to do really bad things if you come into contact with it as most cyclists will at some point in their lives... The Faceplant.
Very unpleasant.
But you just have to watch out for a particularly dangerous species of flora that tends to do really bad things if you come into contact with it as most cyclists will at some point in their lives... The Faceplant.
Very unpleasant.
I saw what you did there. :D
I tend to duck and end up rolling onto my back, with the bike landing on me. I will leave the supper man-ing for Superman. I have done that a few times in the woods where the ground is uneven and I can get off balance on my bike. Street riding is a bit easier, but I have had some run ins with buses...there is just no room next to a bus!
I tend to duck and end up rolling onto my back, with the bike landing on me. I will leave the supper man-ing for Superman. I have done that a few times in the woods where the ground is uneven and I can get off balance on my bike. Street riding is a bit easier, but I have had some run ins with buses...there is just no room next to a bus!
I've had my foot run over by a bus, but that was as a pedestrian so it doesn't count. Not sure what I'm actually doing anywhere near a bike, y'know - I can barely walk without falling over, let along wobbling around on something with only two wheels.
Never mind, just as well my steed has plush, long-travel full suspension - I'm built for comfort, not for speed
See? You're all limber, and lithe, and athletic and fit...
...
...I hate you
Never mind, just as well my steed has plush, long-travel full suspension - I'm built for comfort, not for speed
See? You're all limber, and lithe, and athletic and fit...
...
...I hate you
Sometimes you have to walk before you crawll and sometimes you have design rockets and launch them into space before you ride a bike.
Sometimes i long for comfort at mile marker 95 after 5 hours on a small bike seat...
I am quite sure I am not the epitome of limber....I need more yoga!
Sometimes i long for comfort at mile marker 95 after 5 hours on a small bike seat...
I am quite sure I am not the epitome of limber....I need more yoga!
Oooh, what about a rocket-propelled bike? Now there's an idea that I bet has never ended in disaster before
As for 5 hours on a small bike seat - paging
jkman, we need a butt-massage in here, STAT!
Mmmm, yoghurt... DAMMIT! Yoga, diet, ARERRRRGH!
As for 5 hours on a small bike seat - paging

Mmmm, yoghurt... DAMMIT! Yoga, diet, ARERRRRGH!
Oooh, you're drunk? Excellent
Funny you should mention moose: moose hunting season opened here in Norge just yesterday. They're actually fairly dangerous critters - if you hit one when driving, their legs go out from under them and the moose comes straight across the bonnet and into the car, squishing you.
Funny you should mention moose: moose hunting season opened here in Norge just yesterday. They're actually fairly dangerous critters - if you hit one when driving, their legs go out from under them and the moose comes straight across the bonnet and into the car, squishing you.
/me is rolling around laughing - "It will be mauve and itchy". Nice. How are you with lace doilies?
Bow hunting is very visceral, albeit the stuff I was hunting was purely vermin for eradication purposes. Australian possums. And why the hell wont there be crumpets? BITCH BETTER COOK ME SOME FUCKING CRUMPETS OR I'LL GIVE HIM THE BASH YO.
Bow hunting is very visceral, albeit the stuff I was hunting was purely vermin for eradication purposes. Australian possums. And why the hell wont there be crumpets? BITCH BETTER COOK ME SOME FUCKING CRUMPETS OR I'LL GIVE HIM THE BASH YO.
I can't believe that there's a a pic and story here about a guy getting a boner from looking at bones, and yet I'm at a complete loss for a functional pun... something is WRONG with me today!
Lovely pic, though... seems so delightfully absurd in the moment, and your little story there gives it a good deal of introspective. I'll say that I find the attraction to dead things a little bit weird, but I'm not going to judge, as you manage nevertheless to paint it so beautifully, and... because he's sporting some wicked Elmer Fudd shotgun, thar. :P
Lovely pic, though... seems so delightfully absurd in the moment, and your little story there gives it a good deal of introspective. I'll say that I find the attraction to dead things a little bit weird, but I'm not going to judge, as you manage nevertheless to paint it so beautifully, and... because he's sporting some wicked Elmer Fudd shotgun, thar. :P
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