Not going to lie, I feel like I'm too niche of a person to really integrate into any group. My interests are too niche and even within them, I feel like I manage to find that one corner that nobody really is that interested in.

A part of that comes from the fact that I never feel as if I'm qualified enough to participate head-on in said groups. Motorsports groups and gum groups are a core example of that.

Some of that comes from the fact that even within the groups, there's too much of everything else which I have no interest in from too many for me to feel as if I belong, or can relate to the group at hand.

Some of it comes from the fact that I've been chased away from some groups for having my niche interests, and trying to find others who I can enthusiastically share them with.

Some of it just comes from having felt chased away and unwanted, period.

Some of it comes from cornerstone people who helped me to feel as if I mattered disappearing from my life.

Some of it comes from me comparing the attention I get compared to others within the same group whenever anything happens.

Some of it comes from my own anxieties.

Some of it comes from me building my own self up only to be disappointed in the reality time and time again.


Regardless, it all ends up with me feeling as if I'm in my own corner of the world, boxed up, mattering little to few, as right or wrong as it may be.

Those who I honestly feel comfortable opening the box with, thanks for being there. I'll be fine tonight. I just need to let loose for real for once in my life.