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This is a basic Preview for a story I'm working on called "A Wayward Soul" a story that follows my fursona John on an adventure to save his family and fined the truth about what happened to them.
This was the first story I had ever thought up for my fursona, and recently I decided to rewrite it. for those of you who dun catch it there are a few themes borrowed from things that i was a very big fan of at the time this story was thought up. namely sonic.
I want you honest opinion on my writing style and if this catches your eye as the beginning of the story. this is not a final version i will be changing and adding more. the first part of the story should go for about six chapters each about twice to three times bigger then this.
This was the first story I had ever thought up for my fursona, and recently I decided to rewrite it. for those of you who dun catch it there are a few themes borrowed from things that i was a very big fan of at the time this story was thought up. namely sonic.
I want you honest opinion on my writing style and if this catches your eye as the beginning of the story. this is not a final version i will be changing and adding more. the first part of the story should go for about six chapters each about twice to three times bigger then this.
Category Story / All
Species Vulpine (Other)
Size 50 x 50px
File Size 3.1 kB
Well you have a good first person narrative style that address the reader. As a opening preview the interlude sufficed quiet well. The end also seemed captivating in its rhetoric to the reader. Be careful in your development in clichés and crafting a story because freaking power crystals/gems/emeralds can go sour for you if your not careful. Also prospects of the youth going on great journeys and getting power can also ruin a story if you are not careful in crafting moralistic and reasonable offsets for such youth in there character depths.
So you have a good style first person wise that is captivating, jsut take your time in threshing out details, development and rewriting drafts and it will be good.
So you have a good style first person wise that is captivating, jsut take your time in threshing out details, development and rewriting drafts and it will be good.
Thanks on the comment with my First person narrative, I've spent a wile working it out just right. I noticed a lot of people do not like it because of restraints and limitation to the story, but with how many I've written i picked a few things up that make it work for me.
as for the gems they play a small role in the beginning and a role in the end. you see very little of them throughout the story. also the story more or less is how the main character grows up in a short time in his search, only to find.. well dun wanna spoil anything ^^; so I'll leave it at that.
as for the gems they play a small role in the beginning and a role in the end. you see very little of them throughout the story. also the story more or less is how the main character grows up in a short time in his search, only to find.. well dun wanna spoil anything ^^; so I'll leave it at that.
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