"You guys wanna hear a real ghost story? It was a dark, spooky night, just like this one. And it happened right here in Camp Wildcat. There was a group of campers, just like us, just sitting around and telling ghost stories. Then, there was a rustling in the bushes. They thought maybe it was some squirrel or other camper trying to play a trick on 'em. But out came...a mountain lion!"

"No, wait, it gets even scarier. It jumped out and into the light. It was big and fat, like the biggest one they'd ever seen. Everyone was super scared, ready to run and scream! But it started acting friendly. It made these funny noises and rolled over, acting just like a pet. So everyone went over. They started petting it. Started treating it like it was just a big puppy dog. It was purring, wagging its tail and rubbing against them like it was their new best friend."

"Then it started grabbing them. At first it just pounced and licked like a dog might, like it was just excited to have friends...but then those licks got strong. Little Fred was first. Sweet kid. Always went to bed on time and listened to adults. His eyes were closed cause of the licks so he never saw that mouth open wide. Then...GULP! Down he went. Everyone else just saw his kicking legs getting sucked down. The cat ate him whole, like he was a mouse. They could even hear Fred yelling for help inside the cat, but no one knew what to do."

"The mountain lion pounced again. Now everyone realized they should run. Some people ran into their tents, some tried to find the counselors, some stayed to try and get Fred out of there, but none of 'em made it. The cat may have been big, but it was really fast. No one could outrun it. No one was stronger than it. Some kids tried to beg, but the cat just gave 'em some slurps and ate 'em up like they were catnip. Soon everyone was in that cat's belly, just crying and wiggling inside."

"Now you guys probably think you'd have heard about this on the news or something. Like, if a whole camp got ate by a mountain lion, people would know, right? ...They already knew. In fact, that's why they sent the kids. That's why the camp's called Camp WILDCAT. It's where you get sent when your family doesn't want you anymore. The mountain lion's really powerful. People in town say it's good luck when he's well fed. So parents send their extra kids to camp where they're fattened up and left in the open for the big cat to get 'em. Sometimes he comes soon, sometimes he comes at the very end, but no one survives Camp Wildcat. Sooner or later, you're not camping in the forest...you're camping in the Wildcat!"

"Whatcha think, pretty good, right? Bet you guys didn't know that. ...Oh come on, stop crying, it's just a story. I heard it from Larry and he's the one who says that his brother's from Mars. It's just some dumb thing they tell kids so they get scared."

"...Hey, did you hear something?"

((Art by  byser))