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More from jazzfoxrules
Well, while I may take my time making anything new, it seems Sl44n3sh gave me an excuse to rummage in my old folders. ^^
One of a few artists I've looked to help me create something new, he's doodled a few things that were stuck in my imagination, including this wonderful little pic of Rika and Renamon, after I gave him the brief summary on one of my old fanfics.
So, now complete and combined, the story is actually a year or two old, but after finding it amid some old art nostalgia, I decided to post the two together, it's a bit angsty, notably because I used it to deal with a few of my own issues, but it feels a little more relevant now than then.
And more over, I'm proud of both of them.
An awesome thanks to Sl44n3sh for the art ^_^
And Digimon of course C Bandai, etc :O
One of a few artists I've looked to help me create something new, he's doodled a few things that were stuck in my imagination, including this wonderful little pic of Rika and Renamon, after I gave him the brief summary on one of my old fanfics.
So, now complete and combined, the story is actually a year or two old, but after finding it amid some old art nostalgia, I decided to post the two together, it's a bit angsty, notably because I used it to deal with a few of my own issues, but it feels a little more relevant now than then.
And more over, I'm proud of both of them.
An awesome thanks to Sl44n3sh for the art ^_^
And Digimon of course C Bandai, etc :O
Category Story / Digimon
Species Unspecified / Any
Size 1280 x 1001px
File Size 167.4 kB
CRIPPLED
By Fox A. & Jasmine T. Smith
It seemed all Ruki knew was pain.
She knew it long enough to realise there was no drug or medication strong enough to take the edge off of humiliation as she trundled weakly along, wheelchair bound.
"I don't need help." She snapped with spite, sensing the sympathetic soul behind her, suddenly spinning her head to see Takato stand there, with a guilt ridden expression filled with yearning: All he wanted to do was help.
"I think you've already done far more than enough." She kept her face away from him as she reached down – not daring wince – her heavily swathed hands to grip hold of the bars attached to the wheels and push herself forward again. The result was a single, jerky inch forward that jarred her legs and burnt through her hands.
But she wouldn't let anything show her pain as she braced herself and repeated again, this time; the blanket that covered her lap caught it's edge in the spokes and slid away like a lost soul.
Leaving her vulnerable: she tried to act as if nothing happened, but she couldn't get past the truth as she was left looking down upon herself.
The only thing she wore aside the flimsy hospital gown were the dressings; her forearms bound in bandages nearly an inch in thickness up to her elbows, with an almost mitten like shape, all her fingers were wrapped together, with her only her thumbs separate.
And dangling uselessly, her legs uncovered revealed the gaudy pink fibreglass casts that were degradingly bulky compared to her thin legs: covering from the knee down, where only her toes emerged, pale and swollen looking. She couldn't walk, she could barely grip or pick anything up, hell; she could barely do anything herself now. She knew a word for that.
She called herself a cripple.
Takato, without request or even conscious thought, found himself picking up the blanket; looking to Ruki, but attention locked on a glimpse of her casted legs and he found a lump in his throat he couldn't dislodge. He stood, his fingers gripping tightly into the woollen material.
"Don't say it." She said, her voice now heavily shaken. She didn't look back; as she continued to push onward; no matter how much pain she felt.
It was like the very night they'd met; or the first night he laid eyes upon her. Dark and stormy, rain pummelled the ground mercilessly; and he floated, oblivious to all around him; until recognition of a distant voice roused him to open his eyes.
Yesterday, today and visions of tomorrow all came at once; looking upon the moment it had happened. There was Megiddramon. Takato had made the mistake again… there in the middle of Shinjuku Megiddramon had been reborn… rampant digimon all around scattered in terror of the awesome beast; but there was no escape; not even for him.
He was locked, held in place as if crucified; condemned to watch the beast that was his own friend proceed its rampage of terror. He watched buildings fall, people screaming, fire licking against the stormy night and colouring everything in a deathly red hue even as rain fell earthward; he couldn't stop it.
He could no more stop it than the beast he had unleashed.
All it had been was a simple attack; a few digimon had stormed through; when one had jogressed to Mugendramon…
There he had been, all that was left of the memory was WarGrowmon falling… him failing; and the dark light crawling over his friend that consumed his heart and overpowered him to be possessed and reborn as Meggidramon.
Mugendramon was no longer in this part of the dream.
He was being pulled down. The rain pricking like needles forcing themselves into his back, the wind lashed like scythes against his skin; punishing him all the way down before he hovered over the last part; there, himself, cradling Ruki's form as Renamon stood, helpless; but he could see now what he hadn't that night; he didn't see the look in Renamon's eyes that bore down upon him.
He only saw what was; and what had been that night.
He only saw what he had done.
Unlike the first night – this time he didn't wake with such a start. Once again he found himself drenched in sweat, but that was the only thing the same: Kazu and Kenta weren't going to make jokes of wetting the bed about this dream; he knew himself he wouldn't tell ANYONE of this dream: and this time, he lay in silence for what could easily have been half an hour, before he sat up, and began to cry openly into his palms.
A familiar red saurian near his bed slowly roused; oblivious of the events he had committed the previous evening so it seemed; and at most, surprised to have been woken up at this late hour. There was a strange droning noise in his bat-like ears he'd heard before, but still unaccustomed to. Guilmon looked left and right until he was positive the source was his friend on the bed.
Yet unsure what the noise meant, he moved in close slowly, but finally spoke in a bubbly, nasal tone, "Takato-mon?"
Ruki had an equally restless sleep: she was home now, but it seemed little to no comfort as her situation came, lying on her futon in the quiet dark.
The pain still afflicted her greatly, but tonight it was the physical pain that ailed her most and deprived her sleep. Unlike back at the hospital, her limbs weren't properly elevated enough to keep her comfortable – a myriad of bean bag cushions stuffed under her feet just didn't fit the cut – and even the weight of her blankets seemed an irritation to her injuries; hence why she'd pulled the covers up and hence why she stared at the ceiling – tired of seeing the eyesores on her legs.
Just because she had been unconscious at the time, why did they have to assume she wanted pink – NEON pink – casts; just because she was a girl? Typical adult thinking: if she could have picked it would have been blue, or at least white! She double thought the idea: IF she had any choice, she wouldn't have been here in this situation at all!
She was beginning to drive herself insane – this just couldn't go on – and she was tired of hearing herself.
"Renamon!" She suddenly called; to no response.
Beneath her breath she swore as minutes passed by and still no sign of the vulpine digimon appeared. She was so accustomed to being able to summon her partner at whim that the few times she didn't appear caught her off guard.
Just because she couldn't go out and roam herself didn't mean Renamon had to stay by her side 24/7 – she repulsed the idea of being coddled like that.
But at the same time, it felt like she had been abandoned, left behind unable to keep up: she didn't know which disgusted her more.
Finally giving up on the idea Renamon was coming, she turned her head far enough to see the wheelchair folded against the wall in the inky black. She pushed herself up and instantly regretted it.
Asides the pain it caused either hand to push against the floor, Ruki learned how something mundane can cause a lot of grief: most often when a person sits up, they drag the lower body back just the slightest – and it was just the slightest movement that made it feel as if her bones were grating against one another and simultaneously all the muscles in her legs seized up, letting the pain rip through her as if she'd been shot! She wanted to scream!
But she wouldn't allow herself the luxury.
It was all she needed to scream and bring her mother and grandmother running here to see what had happened: she just didn't need that right now.
All she allowed herself was a gasp, pushing herself to sit without holding herself up anymore, her head full forward with eyes tight shut as she tried to will away the pain, taking deep, sharp breaths over and over…
Screaming or not, however, she couldn't hide the pain from the eyes already watching her. It wasn't until moments after Ruki had opened her eyes and noticed that either spoke. It felt as if they didn't need to.
"Should you push yourself this hard?"
Suddenly Ruki found a spike of hatred, even for her own partner, "You too, Renamon?"
"You didn't answer my question."
Temptation was there for Ruki to rebut into 'you didn't answer mine'; but the fight in her suddenly withered away and she took a good look at herself. "I just couldn't sleep, okay?"
"I didn't want to lie here all night counting the seconds until the casts come off, so I got up."
There was a click, and Ruki let her head fall again; and a bandaged hand rose to cover her eyes from the light that flooded the room as Renamon pulled the switch, striding closer. "Were you not given medication for such matters already?"
Again contempt began to rise, along with Ruki's frustration as she flung such a venomous look with all she could muster, still squinting, but glaring harshly at the fox digimon, "I can barely do anything already, I don't WANT to drug myself stupid as well!"
Renamon finally came to kneel in the formal position beside her tamer and friend. "Then what DO you want to do?"
At first, Ruki opened her mouth, then hesitated and shut it; turning away again; sighed, and then held her bandaged hands a little closer to herself.
"I want to stop everyone treating me like I'm made of glass, that everyone HAS to look down on me and pity me just for being injured: it's degrading…"
"They only show concern for your well being; you are tired just now; perhaps in the morning things will seem better after you sleep."
Suddenly Ruki felt the spike rising, threatening to burst from her as her eyes iced over once more and the spike seemed to come through her words. Had Renamon even listened to her? "There's a limit… I let myself get injured; my mistake! It's NOT going to happen again; and I DON'T want everyone around me thinking like they HAVE to protect me like this; I don't want to be like this!"
Renamon remained silent for a moment; and waited; perhaps to let the spike fall somewhat, but there was more to come.
"I thought you of all of them would listen to me, Renamon…"
"I do. But perhaps you should also." Ruki could feel the spike rising; although Renamon could claim they were still the same; it was her being talked down to; SHE was the tamer who gave the advice and made the decisions; now Renamon had this chance, she was talking down on her? "You're not going to be as active as before like this; the only thing you should do just now is rest and heal quickly."
That reached; finally. Ruki more appreciated those words; although it brushed on uneasy truth, it at least mentioned the idea of healing quickly.
"After your bravery, you deserve some rest at least."
The memory of the incident was still greatly fresh on both their minds – Megiddramon's cries breaking through the crackle of flames; as Renamon fought on against the beast; there she had been; Ruki, with a steel door and flames between her and the girl whose frightened face filled the portal on the grilling.
Ruki vaguely recalled screaming to the girl to get back before she began assaulting the door with the bar in hand, while the flame grew darker and higher around her.
Eventually she managed to ravage the door enough to create a warped opening; just enough between the door and the frame to wedge the edge of the bar in and push; push with all her might and throwing all her body into the effort to tear open the door.
It was slow; and painful as flames licked over her arms; and the heat in the metal bar seared her hands; but she couldn't let go; it was only when the door gave and a sound kick dislodged it that she let the bar fall, from burnt, scarred hands that seemed fused to it; and she took the girl; telling her to run just as the buildings interior crumbled where she'd been; and just as the building fell down upon her.
It was Renamon who knew nothing of this first part; but now; where Ruki had no memory; it was her who had felt that shudder in her heart; the pain that told her something was wrong. Megiddramon swiped viciously at her; returning her from Ultimate to Rookie; and let her fall earthward.
The struggle was worth it as she limped through alleyways; leaving Megiddramon to its orgy of destruction; others would have to deal with it; it was her who had to find Ruki; and there she was; in the arms of Takato.
Her arms bloodied and charred; and her legs still pinned beneath rubble; a heavy girder embedded in the ground by Ruki's side – that had possibly saved her from further harm – was now Renamon's lean to as she gripped tight; and watched dumbstruck.
Her eyes caught Takato; and blame lay square upon his shoulders; murderous contempt in her eyes. She knew; and he knew; it was he to blame.
Afterward; it was the first thing Ruki knew to wake in the hospital; the dazed confusion in her head; a taste in her throat that encouraged her to vomit, with much medical paraphernalia around her; and only a patter of raindrops against the window to make as much as a sound.
Turning her head there had shown her mother; lying down upon the bedside, fast asleep; it was only when she tried to shuffle and sit up that she first felt the return of the pain in her arms; and she cried out.
Only a day or so had passed since then, but still many things had yet to settle in as she looked at herself. Her arms and her hands; the burns to her forearms were superficial; time would heal them soon with some help; but her hands were possible to be scarred for life; that was unknown beneath the layers of gauze, but what if it were true? Would she have to hide them beneath gloves forever and flinch every time she even looked at them?
Maybe she could have dealt with that; maybe it was immature to regard her legs worse; simple fractures in each, two breaks in the left leg; she was lucky to not have her entire legs covered in the pink fibreglass; or worse.
But to be told recovery went with 6-8 weeks like this; and then another 3-4 with walking casts; and maybe further time in physio-therapy… that meant a minimum of nine weeks… worst case scenario twelve weeks and beyond; over three months, the first two unable to even walk…
How did she plan to survive this?
She just couldn't think; and she fought back tears; she was always so independent; even after she'd accepted Takato and Henry and the others as friends; even after all she'd done together with Renamon; there was still the luxury she'd afforded of her own independence. She didn't want to face this.
How did she look? Her hair let down and bedraggled, bearing only an overly large t-shirt of her mothers to sleep in when they'd discovered they couldn't even pull her pyjamas over the casts on her legs, lying there; not even able to drag herself to a stupid wheelchair she was sentenced to for weeks to months?
"I'm so pathetic…" She managed weakly, before bursting into sobs, drowning her face in her palms; not as much as flinching as Renamon held her close in her wide arms and the crackle of leather gloves. "'s nut ferr…" Leaked out her palms, but Renamon said nothing, keeping her close.
"T-Taka'o…ull 'is faul'…"
"Yes."
"WHY?!!?" She opened her palms, nearly screaming as she whipped round to face Renamon. "Why couldn't he have biomerged?!?! Why did he have to let that happen!?! No one would have been in danger; we'd have all been safe; I wouldn't be like this!!"
Renamon pondered, watching the pent up hysterics in Ruki finally surface now; and thought before she spoke. "It only takes a moment of wavering heart to make the wrong decision… concern and fear can easily turn to hatred… hatred with passion can turn to darkness… it is a mistake of but a few moments… but is a mistake that should never be made… Once was enough, but twice is inexcusable…"
Ruki sniffed once; and let it hover there.
"Takato will wait for another day…" Renamon released her hold; but moved only slightly, as her arm reached under Ruki's legs and the other went behind her back.
"R-Renamon!?"
"I think it would do you good to get out of here; if only just for a little while…" She spoke as she used all care and gentleness she could to lift slowly; pulling Ruki from the covers and up, about turning with all grace was befitted her species.
Although gravity wore itself upon the legs dangling over Renamon's arm; Ruki busied herself trying to force the t-shirt she wore to stay down over her lap and keep her decent, she gave no more protest, but she did notice something. "Renamon, where were you?"
There was a remote pause as Renamon realised Ruki had recognised what she had been doing; and then she spoke. "I noticed you humans give flowers to your friends and family who are injured or ill… I thought this notion would work the same for us…"
"Bakka…" As they passed the sliding doors, into the cool night, a wind quivered past the most beautiful sakura sapling left upon the mantelpiece.
By Fox A. & Jasmine T. Smith
It seemed all Ruki knew was pain.
She knew it long enough to realise there was no drug or medication strong enough to take the edge off of humiliation as she trundled weakly along, wheelchair bound.
"I don't need help." She snapped with spite, sensing the sympathetic soul behind her, suddenly spinning her head to see Takato stand there, with a guilt ridden expression filled with yearning: All he wanted to do was help.
"I think you've already done far more than enough." She kept her face away from him as she reached down – not daring wince – her heavily swathed hands to grip hold of the bars attached to the wheels and push herself forward again. The result was a single, jerky inch forward that jarred her legs and burnt through her hands.
But she wouldn't let anything show her pain as she braced herself and repeated again, this time; the blanket that covered her lap caught it's edge in the spokes and slid away like a lost soul.
Leaving her vulnerable: she tried to act as if nothing happened, but she couldn't get past the truth as she was left looking down upon herself.
The only thing she wore aside the flimsy hospital gown were the dressings; her forearms bound in bandages nearly an inch in thickness up to her elbows, with an almost mitten like shape, all her fingers were wrapped together, with her only her thumbs separate.
And dangling uselessly, her legs uncovered revealed the gaudy pink fibreglass casts that were degradingly bulky compared to her thin legs: covering from the knee down, where only her toes emerged, pale and swollen looking. She couldn't walk, she could barely grip or pick anything up, hell; she could barely do anything herself now. She knew a word for that.
She called herself a cripple.
Takato, without request or even conscious thought, found himself picking up the blanket; looking to Ruki, but attention locked on a glimpse of her casted legs and he found a lump in his throat he couldn't dislodge. He stood, his fingers gripping tightly into the woollen material.
"Don't say it." She said, her voice now heavily shaken. She didn't look back; as she continued to push onward; no matter how much pain she felt.
It was like the very night they'd met; or the first night he laid eyes upon her. Dark and stormy, rain pummelled the ground mercilessly; and he floated, oblivious to all around him; until recognition of a distant voice roused him to open his eyes.
Yesterday, today and visions of tomorrow all came at once; looking upon the moment it had happened. There was Megiddramon. Takato had made the mistake again… there in the middle of Shinjuku Megiddramon had been reborn… rampant digimon all around scattered in terror of the awesome beast; but there was no escape; not even for him.
He was locked, held in place as if crucified; condemned to watch the beast that was his own friend proceed its rampage of terror. He watched buildings fall, people screaming, fire licking against the stormy night and colouring everything in a deathly red hue even as rain fell earthward; he couldn't stop it.
He could no more stop it than the beast he had unleashed.
All it had been was a simple attack; a few digimon had stormed through; when one had jogressed to Mugendramon…
There he had been, all that was left of the memory was WarGrowmon falling… him failing; and the dark light crawling over his friend that consumed his heart and overpowered him to be possessed and reborn as Meggidramon.
Mugendramon was no longer in this part of the dream.
He was being pulled down. The rain pricking like needles forcing themselves into his back, the wind lashed like scythes against his skin; punishing him all the way down before he hovered over the last part; there, himself, cradling Ruki's form as Renamon stood, helpless; but he could see now what he hadn't that night; he didn't see the look in Renamon's eyes that bore down upon him.
He only saw what was; and what had been that night.
He only saw what he had done.
Unlike the first night – this time he didn't wake with such a start. Once again he found himself drenched in sweat, but that was the only thing the same: Kazu and Kenta weren't going to make jokes of wetting the bed about this dream; he knew himself he wouldn't tell ANYONE of this dream: and this time, he lay in silence for what could easily have been half an hour, before he sat up, and began to cry openly into his palms.
A familiar red saurian near his bed slowly roused; oblivious of the events he had committed the previous evening so it seemed; and at most, surprised to have been woken up at this late hour. There was a strange droning noise in his bat-like ears he'd heard before, but still unaccustomed to. Guilmon looked left and right until he was positive the source was his friend on the bed.
Yet unsure what the noise meant, he moved in close slowly, but finally spoke in a bubbly, nasal tone, "Takato-mon?"
Ruki had an equally restless sleep: she was home now, but it seemed little to no comfort as her situation came, lying on her futon in the quiet dark.
The pain still afflicted her greatly, but tonight it was the physical pain that ailed her most and deprived her sleep. Unlike back at the hospital, her limbs weren't properly elevated enough to keep her comfortable – a myriad of bean bag cushions stuffed under her feet just didn't fit the cut – and even the weight of her blankets seemed an irritation to her injuries; hence why she'd pulled the covers up and hence why she stared at the ceiling – tired of seeing the eyesores on her legs.
Just because she had been unconscious at the time, why did they have to assume she wanted pink – NEON pink – casts; just because she was a girl? Typical adult thinking: if she could have picked it would have been blue, or at least white! She double thought the idea: IF she had any choice, she wouldn't have been here in this situation at all!
She was beginning to drive herself insane – this just couldn't go on – and she was tired of hearing herself.
"Renamon!" She suddenly called; to no response.
Beneath her breath she swore as minutes passed by and still no sign of the vulpine digimon appeared. She was so accustomed to being able to summon her partner at whim that the few times she didn't appear caught her off guard.
Just because she couldn't go out and roam herself didn't mean Renamon had to stay by her side 24/7 – she repulsed the idea of being coddled like that.
But at the same time, it felt like she had been abandoned, left behind unable to keep up: she didn't know which disgusted her more.
Finally giving up on the idea Renamon was coming, she turned her head far enough to see the wheelchair folded against the wall in the inky black. She pushed herself up and instantly regretted it.
Asides the pain it caused either hand to push against the floor, Ruki learned how something mundane can cause a lot of grief: most often when a person sits up, they drag the lower body back just the slightest – and it was just the slightest movement that made it feel as if her bones were grating against one another and simultaneously all the muscles in her legs seized up, letting the pain rip through her as if she'd been shot! She wanted to scream!
But she wouldn't allow herself the luxury.
It was all she needed to scream and bring her mother and grandmother running here to see what had happened: she just didn't need that right now.
All she allowed herself was a gasp, pushing herself to sit without holding herself up anymore, her head full forward with eyes tight shut as she tried to will away the pain, taking deep, sharp breaths over and over…
Screaming or not, however, she couldn't hide the pain from the eyes already watching her. It wasn't until moments after Ruki had opened her eyes and noticed that either spoke. It felt as if they didn't need to.
"Should you push yourself this hard?"
Suddenly Ruki found a spike of hatred, even for her own partner, "You too, Renamon?"
"You didn't answer my question."
Temptation was there for Ruki to rebut into 'you didn't answer mine'; but the fight in her suddenly withered away and she took a good look at herself. "I just couldn't sleep, okay?"
"I didn't want to lie here all night counting the seconds until the casts come off, so I got up."
There was a click, and Ruki let her head fall again; and a bandaged hand rose to cover her eyes from the light that flooded the room as Renamon pulled the switch, striding closer. "Were you not given medication for such matters already?"
Again contempt began to rise, along with Ruki's frustration as she flung such a venomous look with all she could muster, still squinting, but glaring harshly at the fox digimon, "I can barely do anything already, I don't WANT to drug myself stupid as well!"
Renamon finally came to kneel in the formal position beside her tamer and friend. "Then what DO you want to do?"
At first, Ruki opened her mouth, then hesitated and shut it; turning away again; sighed, and then held her bandaged hands a little closer to herself.
"I want to stop everyone treating me like I'm made of glass, that everyone HAS to look down on me and pity me just for being injured: it's degrading…"
"They only show concern for your well being; you are tired just now; perhaps in the morning things will seem better after you sleep."
Suddenly Ruki felt the spike rising, threatening to burst from her as her eyes iced over once more and the spike seemed to come through her words. Had Renamon even listened to her? "There's a limit… I let myself get injured; my mistake! It's NOT going to happen again; and I DON'T want everyone around me thinking like they HAVE to protect me like this; I don't want to be like this!"
Renamon remained silent for a moment; and waited; perhaps to let the spike fall somewhat, but there was more to come.
"I thought you of all of them would listen to me, Renamon…"
"I do. But perhaps you should also." Ruki could feel the spike rising; although Renamon could claim they were still the same; it was her being talked down to; SHE was the tamer who gave the advice and made the decisions; now Renamon had this chance, she was talking down on her? "You're not going to be as active as before like this; the only thing you should do just now is rest and heal quickly."
That reached; finally. Ruki more appreciated those words; although it brushed on uneasy truth, it at least mentioned the idea of healing quickly.
"After your bravery, you deserve some rest at least."
The memory of the incident was still greatly fresh on both their minds – Megiddramon's cries breaking through the crackle of flames; as Renamon fought on against the beast; there she had been; Ruki, with a steel door and flames between her and the girl whose frightened face filled the portal on the grilling.
Ruki vaguely recalled screaming to the girl to get back before she began assaulting the door with the bar in hand, while the flame grew darker and higher around her.
Eventually she managed to ravage the door enough to create a warped opening; just enough between the door and the frame to wedge the edge of the bar in and push; push with all her might and throwing all her body into the effort to tear open the door.
It was slow; and painful as flames licked over her arms; and the heat in the metal bar seared her hands; but she couldn't let go; it was only when the door gave and a sound kick dislodged it that she let the bar fall, from burnt, scarred hands that seemed fused to it; and she took the girl; telling her to run just as the buildings interior crumbled where she'd been; and just as the building fell down upon her.
It was Renamon who knew nothing of this first part; but now; where Ruki had no memory; it was her who had felt that shudder in her heart; the pain that told her something was wrong. Megiddramon swiped viciously at her; returning her from Ultimate to Rookie; and let her fall earthward.
The struggle was worth it as she limped through alleyways; leaving Megiddramon to its orgy of destruction; others would have to deal with it; it was her who had to find Ruki; and there she was; in the arms of Takato.
Her arms bloodied and charred; and her legs still pinned beneath rubble; a heavy girder embedded in the ground by Ruki's side – that had possibly saved her from further harm – was now Renamon's lean to as she gripped tight; and watched dumbstruck.
Her eyes caught Takato; and blame lay square upon his shoulders; murderous contempt in her eyes. She knew; and he knew; it was he to blame.
Afterward; it was the first thing Ruki knew to wake in the hospital; the dazed confusion in her head; a taste in her throat that encouraged her to vomit, with much medical paraphernalia around her; and only a patter of raindrops against the window to make as much as a sound.
Turning her head there had shown her mother; lying down upon the bedside, fast asleep; it was only when she tried to shuffle and sit up that she first felt the return of the pain in her arms; and she cried out.
Only a day or so had passed since then, but still many things had yet to settle in as she looked at herself. Her arms and her hands; the burns to her forearms were superficial; time would heal them soon with some help; but her hands were possible to be scarred for life; that was unknown beneath the layers of gauze, but what if it were true? Would she have to hide them beneath gloves forever and flinch every time she even looked at them?
Maybe she could have dealt with that; maybe it was immature to regard her legs worse; simple fractures in each, two breaks in the left leg; she was lucky to not have her entire legs covered in the pink fibreglass; or worse.
But to be told recovery went with 6-8 weeks like this; and then another 3-4 with walking casts; and maybe further time in physio-therapy… that meant a minimum of nine weeks… worst case scenario twelve weeks and beyond; over three months, the first two unable to even walk…
How did she plan to survive this?
She just couldn't think; and she fought back tears; she was always so independent; even after she'd accepted Takato and Henry and the others as friends; even after all she'd done together with Renamon; there was still the luxury she'd afforded of her own independence. She didn't want to face this.
How did she look? Her hair let down and bedraggled, bearing only an overly large t-shirt of her mothers to sleep in when they'd discovered they couldn't even pull her pyjamas over the casts on her legs, lying there; not even able to drag herself to a stupid wheelchair she was sentenced to for weeks to months?
"I'm so pathetic…" She managed weakly, before bursting into sobs, drowning her face in her palms; not as much as flinching as Renamon held her close in her wide arms and the crackle of leather gloves. "'s nut ferr…" Leaked out her palms, but Renamon said nothing, keeping her close.
"T-Taka'o…ull 'is faul'…"
"Yes."
"WHY?!!?" She opened her palms, nearly screaming as she whipped round to face Renamon. "Why couldn't he have biomerged?!?! Why did he have to let that happen!?! No one would have been in danger; we'd have all been safe; I wouldn't be like this!!"
Renamon pondered, watching the pent up hysterics in Ruki finally surface now; and thought before she spoke. "It only takes a moment of wavering heart to make the wrong decision… concern and fear can easily turn to hatred… hatred with passion can turn to darkness… it is a mistake of but a few moments… but is a mistake that should never be made… Once was enough, but twice is inexcusable…"
Ruki sniffed once; and let it hover there.
"Takato will wait for another day…" Renamon released her hold; but moved only slightly, as her arm reached under Ruki's legs and the other went behind her back.
"R-Renamon!?"
"I think it would do you good to get out of here; if only just for a little while…" She spoke as she used all care and gentleness she could to lift slowly; pulling Ruki from the covers and up, about turning with all grace was befitted her species.
Although gravity wore itself upon the legs dangling over Renamon's arm; Ruki busied herself trying to force the t-shirt she wore to stay down over her lap and keep her decent, she gave no more protest, but she did notice something. "Renamon, where were you?"
There was a remote pause as Renamon realised Ruki had recognised what she had been doing; and then she spoke. "I noticed you humans give flowers to your friends and family who are injured or ill… I thought this notion would work the same for us…"
"Bakka…" As they passed the sliding doors, into the cool night, a wind quivered past the most beautiful sakura sapling left upon the mantelpiece.
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