An Emotional Semi ‘Free-Verse’ Exercise.

***

I wear a mask.
Why, you ask?
I had to hide myself from you.
And let the mask speak for me.

When I wanted to cry, the mask smiled.
When I wanted to yell, the mask smiled.
When I wanted to smile, the mask smiled more.
Nothing less, Nothing more.

This was before my mask cracked.
It revealed what I was underneath.
Even though I was scared, I did the impossible.
I ripped off what was left and showed beneath.

I was at fault for letting it break.
Not the one who finally broke it.
You never apologized. You never took blame.
You just wanted me to hide it again.

I did just that. I wore a new mask.
The mask was clear.
I wasn’t hiding anymore.
I saw everything that I hadn’t before.

But what did you see?
The real me.
The emotions I hid.
Nothing to hide.

No new mask to wear.
I showed what I felt.
But you never changed.
I know why.

You never saw what was under the mask.
I hid from you.
You never understood, so you wouldn’t understand.
This mask is unique.

When I cry, you’d see it.
When I yell, you’d hear it.
When I’m happy, you’d know it.
But I was wrong.

You knew nothing about the one underneath the mask.
You thought I was wearing a new one.
One with sharp horns and a mischievous grin.
You hated what you’ve thought I’ve become.

What to do… What mask to wear?
You leave me no choice.
I must wear a new mask.
One not clear.

Void of emotion.
Void of compassion.
Void of expression.
Void of humanity.

This is what you want?
So be it declared.
You’ll see me no longer.
This mask I now wear.