The shadow of Asimov looms large...

Seriously, you nailed the tone perfectly. The text flows, too, apart from the places where you skipped words and such. This is good. A worthy tribute to Golden Age sci-fi. And with plenty of mysteries to explore in future stories, too.

Edit: bonus points for the aliens communicating entirely through gestures and body language. It's subtly suggested, yet clear enough. A tricky balancing act you got just right.

Thank you kitty! I seem more and more my true voice is coming finally. My last few works was definitely old school AND predictive. I can see that Wells, and Asimov had a profound effect on my writings.

The gestures based language although inspired from Harrison's "West of Eden" trilogy, was difficult to do but I'm glad I did it. For it fits more of my theme in writing non-humans. Not 'humans in fur suits' as Shadowwalker told me years ago but true non-human beings.

Just a few typos is all. But it left me pulled away from this world and made me feel like the characters and the places that surrounded them surrounded me. I got immersed in this story Kan. I loved it. I feel like your onto something with this book. My momma told me there is a song that was done by a guy named Billy Thorpe called Children of the Sun. She played it for me and it sounds really cool. I think your story is amazing and brilliant. I felt like I was in the back ground listening to the brood Mother and the commander spar with abrupt and firm words and body language.💛💛💛 it was a tiny bit lethargic towards the plot but it quickly went away after.

Thank you very much! The immersion is one thing I tried hard to do. You saw things I also was trying hard to portray; the dialog showing emotions. As I told Claude (above) the language by interpretative dance and movement was hard to write. If it wasn't for Harry Harrison I wouldn't have been able to pull it off.

The starts are ALWAYS a big headache for me, and I'm still learning that as well but even my teacher showed me that once I got past that it worked. More things I need to learn.

(giggles) I got Children of the Sun playing now and I remember it, although it's been a very long time.

There is another song of "Children of the sun" which I actually took the name from: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LnxjMZwFn90

I have a sequel in mind, that I'll try to do a lot better on. You and others drive me to be better.

What do you mean do better? you did amazing and beyond any writer I know... You brilliantly made a story that makes me say "hurry up and make a SEQUEL!!!!!" giggles *hugs*💛💛💛

(giggles) Thank you deer. I can sort of see the setting to the sequal and even have a few notes like:

In the city center, a circular plaza of stone, and buildings that reach for the sky a mile above as holographic beings shimmer into view as well as biologicals group around a podium. The statue of an Anikawi doe standing looking up to the sky as she reaches for something. A human man standing with represenitives of all the Terran sapients standing with him. "In this great time, only 230 years after the great Anikawi chiefess Spiritwalker on this spot signed the final treaty between humans, and Plentycaels uniting us into the /Terran/ world, we now stand on another even greater jump."

All look up, as a mothership slowly starts to decend down now, little ships now exiting from all over it to fly around the city. Then another being walks out of a building toward the podium. Repilian, with a long thick tail, two large eyes on both sides of it's head, dressed lightly. It starts an interpirive dance, tail spilling in a conter clockwise direction. Her skin quickly changing colors to add meaning to the movements. Then she speaks in a throaty but complex langage. Finally the resident translators playing "Thank you Prime Minister Alexender. On behalf of the Yilan federation, I welcome Terra into the League of Interstellar Alliance."

Of course, how it comes out ultimately all depends but that's sort of my vision.

Yeah that! that's what I'm talking about! OMG where is the rest!!! This story is so amazing and so beautiful. I love all of the sweet and gorgeous names of the creatures you give them. Just fascinating...💛💛💛💛💛

Thank you deer :). I'm thinking of how to write this of course. Hopefully soon.

Why thank you! It may be found that my writing is quite deep. "Plentycaels" -the race of uplifts, is from the Welsh mythologies "Plent'cael" or changing child. Anikawi from the Cherokee 'deer clan' Spiritwalker is her tribal name, for she not only completed her Spiritwalk -- a ritualistic right of passage, but also for one who brought a great change to the tribe. She's also named after the original Spiritwalker of 130 years prior who started the spiritwalk.

You'll see a lot of mythology in my writing, as I was and still fascinated by mythologies, and folklore. So thank you deer, for noticing :)

PS I love that song my momma has that song on her computer. She has 496 million songs on it. I'm not allowed on that computer.

I had lot to say on this, as I did a deep critique of it so you can think on things I will send it through note.

Thank you, deer teacher!

Down loading it now. Are you familiar with Billy Thorpe?

(giggles) Oh yes, I remember it. 1984 going to college with this playing in my CD player.