Its good all round, I get the characters very well from your writing and its pretty unique in style. I like that although you've got the storyline in there, you've got a tiny bit of technical stuff to break it up (For the dudes)

A few things, check your SP;
Title, is it swining or Swinging
First line, is it trial or trail
for example, theres a few others but I don't want to go into that too much.

Also your use of words is very good, I think I like your style a little better than mine in some places. But one line got me 'Gourd said a little more silently than normal', personally I think quietly might have sufficed.


Other than that, good short story. As for my own, I've just spotted a good few problems with it so I may have to re-upload