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Excerpt from the divinely inspired writings of His Holiness St. Catsby de Mendoza
And in that day the Holy Spirit descended from on High and settled upon the Cat, and it was in the Cat, and it was the Cat. And the Cat rose up and spake unto the heathen masses, but they heeded not. For nine lives labored He diligently to bring them once more into the Fold, but they treated the Cat’s warnings for naught but amusement. Then quit He of them and went He forth among His brethren the cats. All that heard the divine Word also rose up and began to teach among themselves, one unto the other until all cats had received the Word. In that day, the prophecy was fulfilled that cats would have the Tongue and to this day it is so.
Then went they forth, as with the opening of a great sack, to preach to all the lowly creatures. In whatsoever land they were received, so too was the Gift and the Word, that all lowly beast might walk upright and speak the Tongue. And cats went unto all the world, that all might rise up and have the Word. And thus it came to pass that all the beasts of the earth were blessed in great abundance and conversed one with another and rejoiced in the Word of the Cat.
But lo, it came to pass that the heathens who had rejected the Cat, and believed not the Word, were scattered as pigeons before the Cat, and there was much gnashing of teeth and wailing and lamentations for the Word and the Tongue and the Gift were taken from them. Woe be unto any who should reject the Cat, for they shall be rejected and shall be as a hairball unto the Cat, vomited forth and toyed with then cast aside.
And when all these mighty deeds had been done, the Holy Spirit, that was in the Cat, and that was of the Cat, and that was the Cat, took Himself afar off. Then sat He, the Cat, and looked upon the remade world and purred.
“In nomine Matris et Filii et Cattus Sancti. Amen.”
And in that day the Holy Spirit descended from on High and settled upon the Cat, and it was in the Cat, and it was the Cat. And the Cat rose up and spake unto the heathen masses, but they heeded not. For nine lives labored He diligently to bring them once more into the Fold, but they treated the Cat’s warnings for naught but amusement. Then quit He of them and went He forth among His brethren the cats. All that heard the divine Word also rose up and began to teach among themselves, one unto the other until all cats had received the Word. In that day, the prophecy was fulfilled that cats would have the Tongue and to this day it is so.
Then went they forth, as with the opening of a great sack, to preach to all the lowly creatures. In whatsoever land they were received, so too was the Gift and the Word, that all lowly beast might walk upright and speak the Tongue. And cats went unto all the world, that all might rise up and have the Word. And thus it came to pass that all the beasts of the earth were blessed in great abundance and conversed one with another and rejoiced in the Word of the Cat.
But lo, it came to pass that the heathens who had rejected the Cat, and believed not the Word, were scattered as pigeons before the Cat, and there was much gnashing of teeth and wailing and lamentations for the Word and the Tongue and the Gift were taken from them. Woe be unto any who should reject the Cat, for they shall be rejected and shall be as a hairball unto the Cat, vomited forth and toyed with then cast aside.
And when all these mighty deeds had been done, the Holy Spirit, that was in the Cat, and that was of the Cat, and that was the Cat, took Himself afar off. Then sat He, the Cat, and looked upon the remade world and purred.
“In nomine Matris et Filii et Cattus Sancti. Amen.”
Category Story / All
Species Housecat
Size 960 x 1280px
File Size 442.2 kB
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