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For better or worse, titanic aliens decide to assess human military capabilities in the midst of a pandemic. What could possibly go wrong?
Credit for the icon goes to
GasMaskFox
~~~~~
New York City served as the hotspot for a deadly disease.
Consequently, the typical tourist traps were abandoned. Whether it be the Statue of Liberty, Times Square, Central Park, or even the World Trade Center. All had minimal activity. Exceptions came in the form of an amalgamation of low tech and high tech vehicles originating from both alien and human designs flying around the vicinity. Otherwise, the only other exciting sight came in the form of a massive ship descending upon the area, albeit it was one of many space-faring vessels in the modern era, and an alien within it gazed upon the empty streets from the safety of its reinforced hull.
"It looks like we might need to reschedule things…" said the alien as she stood from a terminal.
"Why's that?" asked a young male from her species.
"Because even human military forces are being isolated from civilians to contain the outbreak."
The alien made a dismissive gesture with his clawed hand. "It's not like we can catch it. So, we should be fine. Don't worry!"
"That might be true, Kav'ram, but we can still spread it. Our human allies have suffered enough as it is. If we intend to resume our mission of analyzing their various military capabilities for our own ends, certain precautions may become necessary to avoid putting their warriors in jeopardy."
"You worry too much, my battle sister!"
She scratched behind one of her black ears. "Look… I have no choice BUT to be worried. Being on human worlds always makes me feel so anxious since just one wrong step could hurt someone! Imagine acting like you're constantly walking on eggshells everywhere you go..."
"It's not that bad!" asserted Kav'ram with a swoosh of his tails. "You get used to it."
"... You've been on human worlds before?"
"Yeah!" he answered with both blonde tails wagging.
In return, the woman looked at him with disdain filling her emerald green eyes. "Why?"
"They can be fun! You should visit one at some point, Ami'mit."
"That's Warrant Officer Ami'mit to you, cadet."
He broke eye contact. "Ah, right…"
"Nonetheless, I don't really see the appeal. Especially from my experiences on their frontier worlds. What sort of entertainment could human planets possibly offer to creatures such as ourselves, anyway?"
Kav'ram formed a thinking man's pose. "Well… they have some hilarious shows!"
"Such as…?"
"OH! I just remembered a great one! It's a favorite of mine, and it stars a human scientist acting as the main character. There's this great episode where he… hehe… sorry!" The man paused to snicker. "He turns himself into a pickle! A FREAKING PICKLE! It was the funniest thing I've ever seen, I kid you not my battle sister!"
As the young man laughed hysterically, Ami'mit remained unamused. "Ah. That certainly sounds like the pinnacle of human comedy…"
"But that's not all!" he continued.
"We're wasting time, cadet. Back on topic. I want to know if you acquired all the necessary supplies and materials for the humans we're assessing."
Kav'ram raised a clawed finger. "No worries! I did some research and consulted with a few humans to acquire provisions specifically to cater to US Marines. Come and see!"
The man walked away with a flick of his tails, and the warrant officer sighed before following him. Soon, they approached some pallets on the floor. They contained various human foodstuffs, albeit the sizes of the pallets themselves barely went past their ankles. One colorful pallet, in particular, stood out from the otherwise dull MREs and their predominantly brown packaging…
"What in the name of the goddess is that, Kav'ram?"
"Crayons!" exclaimed the cadet. "Apparently, US Marines consider them a delicacy."
"...Really?"
"It should serve as a nice morale boost, don't you think?"
Ami'mit practically facepalmed. "Not necessarily, my battle brother… even humans would hesitate before eating something like that."
"Oh. Well, maybe it's a dessert...?"
The warrant officer shook her head. "Sure, it is. Regardless, you need to find the others to help move the supplies. We will land soon."
"On it!" he replied before saluting the woman and promptly departing the scene.
From there, the woman focused her attention on several nearby mechs...
Wolverine model mechs. There were four in total, and each stood somewhere around eighteen meters tall. Despite this, the aliens were still generally larger than them. The mechs definitely lived up to their names, however, due to the sheer amount of armor and weaponry adorning their mechanized forms. Whether it be shoulder-mounted rocket launchers, arm based cannons, or the equivalent of coaxial machine guns scattered across several vital locations… all of which were a result of joint design efforts between the two species.
Most importantly, each mech only required a single human pilot, unlike other war machines.
As Ami'mit inspected them, she made some final preparations by going through a mental checklist. "Let's just get this over with..." she said to nobody in particular.
Eventually, their ship made landfall near Brooklyn. Half a dozen alien soldiers hauled supplies or escorted mechs to the local Marine Reserve center as Ami'mit led the group at the front. They utilized a unique paved pathway created explicitly for their kind, and a communication device perched on her ear glowed green as it made sense of an otherwise incomprehensible transmission.
"It's about damn time that our beloved Joraxian allies showed up."
Ami'mit quickly spotted the raspy and masculine source, which was a human in yet another Wolverine model mech. He was standing near the entrance to the facility. Oddly enough, he was the only human present, albeit the only exception was a helicopter briefly flying overhead.
"Ah, yes…" said the warrant officer as her underlings entered the base itself, "And you're welcome for the supplies and other gifts that we're bestowing upon you today. Where are the other humans, exactly?"
The mech remained motionless. "What about 'em?"
"Typically, they like to line up in a formation to greet us for the sake of a tradition or ceremony I'm still familiarizing myself with."
"Oh, that. They're currently under pretty strict quarantine measures. The top brass is furious because it seems like all it's accomplishing is driving them mad..."
The woman swished her tails independently from one another. "Elaborate."
"Ugh. Where do I start?"
"Share any information you deem necessary, human."
The mech slowly moved one of its two legs to reposition itself. "Alright, but you asked for it. The boys got bored pretty quickly when this started and had a brawl in the barracks, which the military police had to break up. One also got drunk and fell down the stairs. Then they huddled around in a dark room to watch pornography together on a single laptop, but their commanding officer walked in on it. After that, some guy decided to shave his balls in the shower, got into a fight with an NCO over it, then heavily disciplined. Someone also pulled a knife on their roommate. So... a sergeant and like four corporals had to restrain the dude. Oh, and that same guy who shaved his balls decided to smear his shit in the showers as a form of protest, and I'm pretty sure at least half of the barracks has alcohol poisoning since they're talking about cracking down on the people bringing in booze…"
Ami'mit's nose scrunched up. "Um…"
"But that's not even the worst part! Some dude brought in like five soundbars and strategically placed them around the barracks. He started blasting... I'm a barbie girl, or whatever that song is called… while we were trying to sleep in the middle of the night. The dude also started screaming the lyrics. Poorly. Another guy went to fight him, their friends got involved, which turned into a brawl, then somehow the place got lit on fire during the ensuing frenzy…"
"I've heard enough!" interrupted Ami'mit with a light growl. "Is any of this going to impair our training exercise? If so, we can drop off our supplies and reschedule the session for the future."
"Nah, nah… no worries. Also, sorry if I got carried away, Ma'am."
Ami'mit pulled out a tablet. "You are forgiven, but now I have to see things for myself if they are as bad as you say they are."
"I'm not sure if that's a good idea..."
"Oh well." she replied with a shrug.
Without further delay, the warrant officer synced her device to one of the local networks. Her security clearances promptly granted her access. From there, her tablet allowed her to look directly through some security cameras, and a few screen swipes gave her a perfect view inside the local barracks built specifically for this occasion.
Ami'mit's ears folded against her head upon seeing the marines.
Unlike her own matriarchal species, the interior of the barracks appeared to be exclusively composed of males. They had hair on their heads instead of horns, flesh in the place of fur, and white sclera surrounding their irises rather than black ones. More concerningly, most were lined up against both sides of a hallway. This was all to watch two humans on each end of the hall, albeit they were both riding on top of another marine like a horse, and they came complete with strapped on pillows as if they were improvised armor, blankets being used as reins for their mounts, and brooms acting as the equivalent of lances.
The warrant officer watched with her jaw agape as one of the marines, a bizarre knight of sorts, shouted at the top of his lungs.
"My name is Carolus Rex! Commander of the fourth platoon. I'll be fighting for freedom in both this life and the next!"
He slammed a broom handle against the floor for emphasis. As a result, the crowd went wild as they whooped, shouted, and hollered. Some pulled out their smartphones to record the spectacle. Afterward, all eyes were on his opponent, a human with caramel-colored skin, and this rival adjusted his pillow helmet before puckering his lips and allowing his voice to fill the air.
"My name is Humphrey of the West, impregnator of wives and sucker of titties… AND YOU SHALL BE SMITED AS A HEATHEN!"
Once more, the assembled marines went into a frenzy by screaming as the two readied their brooms.
"CHARGE, my loyal steed!" commanded Carolus Rex.
Immediately, the two marine mounts crawled towards one another. They galloped like horses. A mix of shouting from the other marines and their riders striking their rears urged them to move faster. Before they came into contact, Carolus's so-called stead crawled a little too quickly, then collapsed to the floor. This allowed Humphrey of the West to easily knock Carolus Rex off his mount with the broom, securing his victory in the apparent jousting tournament as everyone went nuts.
"THE DAY IS MINE!" shouted Humphrey at the top of his lungs. alongside waving his broom in the air. "AAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!"
Meanwhile, Ami'mit found herself flabbergasted. "What sort of nonsense is this?" she asked before facing the human mech again. "They're acting like complete animals in there with their childish mock battles!" She paused to watch several other clearly intoxicated humans sharing a bottle of whiskey and laughing like madmen. "Ugh… is this how professional human warriors typically conduct themselves?"
"As I said, Ma'am, I think these quarantine measures might be driving some people crazy. They're just trying to have fun. I wouldn't… wait, where are you going?"
Ignoring the mech, Ami'mit strolled towards the nearby barracks with her fangs bared. Her sheer size, sharp claws, and scarlet red fur turned her into a building-sized demon as she left the pathway reserved for Joraxians and entered an area only meant for humans. The man in the mech momentarily chased after her, but his mechanical legs moved much more slowly compared to herself.
"Ma'am! You're going into a restricted zone!"
"I know." she replied with a flick of her tails.
The mech stopped walking for a moment. "Then, you know how dangerous that is, right?"
Ami'mit didn't bother with responding and left the mech behind. For a few moments, the woman carefully stepped around stray benches, light posts, trees, vehicles, and other random objects. She only stopped when she finally reached the barracks itself. Even without listening to the tablet, she could still hear whatever chaotic commotions were going on within the building, but a lone human man resting against a wall and holding an empty vodka bottle caught her attention first and foremost.
"Marine!" said Ami'mit with a snarl.
The drunken man recoiled at the sight of a massive alien looming overhead. He blinked several times. Afterward, he rubbed his eyes as the warrant officer went to a position of attention. Despite this, the man resumed phasing in and out reality as he wobbled in place and looked between himself, the whiskey bottle, and Ami'mit.
"What… uh, what do you want?" muttered the man.
"Potential brothers in arms!" she answered with a sneer. "You're supposed to be one of humanity's finest warriors. All human marines, regardless of their nation of origin, are prime candidates for our training program to create more outright space marines. Hence our assessments. Even if you're not fighting alongside us, you still need to be able to defend your own homeworld in case we can't protect you against someone trying to invade you again. Yet... I've been presented with nothing but drunken fools so far… not the sort of people I would trust with anything... much less my life."
"Get out of my light." said the drunk with a grunt.
The woman scoffed. "That's not how this works. I'm the one that gives orders!"
He waved his bottle and chuckled. "You can't tell me what to do, you skyscraper-sized slut!"
Before Ami'mit could react, a familiar voice shouted in the distance…
"HEY! She's not the size of a skyscraper!"
Glancing over her shoulder, the warrant officer spotted Kav'ram nearby. He was standing next to some other concerned Joraxian soldiers and staring at her with his wide, purple eyes. The sight inspired Ami'mit to close her own eyes as she sighed and spoke under her breath…
"Yeah. I'm done. I deal with enough idiots as it is... THE LAST THING WE NEED IS MINIATURE ONES!"
With that, the woman began walking back to the pathway. The drunken man eventually fell over as a direct result of her shouting. Unlike before, she completely disregarded her environment. Benches, bushes, and even a few bicycles were crushed by her combat boots, while some small stone structures such as a water fountain and a statue, were crumbled instead. With complete indifference to this sudden destruction, she returned to what amounted to the alien safety zone where the others awaited her.
"Did you really have to do that?" asked the man in the mech as he gazed upon the aftermath of her outburst. Although it only took a matter of seconds, it looked like a storm swept through the vicinity. The drunk man kept laughing and laughing as other marines departed the barracks to figure out what was going on, just to find themselves in shock at the sight of whatever happened outside.
"No." finally answered Ami'mit in a stone-cold tone. "I just stopped caring."
At her words, Kav'rum's tails drooped down. "Are you alright?"
"I'll be fine." she answered while looking at the distant humans with daggers in her eyes. "My bad. I... need to remember not to lose my temper." Ami'mit stopped speaking for several seconds to take a few deep breaths. "For now, we need to focus on getting the mechs back to our ship since it would be a waste of resources otherwise."
"What about the supplies?" he asked.
"Leave them. They're not worth the effort, and they probably need it. As I said, the mechs are far more valuable, and they'd be better spent training some more worthy human forces."
Kav'ram looked at the warrant officer in complete bewilderment as he tilted his head. "So… we're not doing the assessment, then?"
"Of course not! They've already failed as far as I'm concerned with their poor conduct. If they have strong feelings about my decision, perhaps they can request another assessment during the next solar cycle!"
After saying this, the warrant officer opened her tablet again and swiped through it until a checklist popped up on the screen. One prominent question appeared at the bottom...
Would you personally recommend this human unit for interstellar military training?
A clawed finger marked the checkbox stating a single word…
No
And so, the marines driven mad by a pandemic failed their first test, but they would only be one of many human military units undergoing a similar assessment… for better or worse.
Credit for the icon goes to
GasMaskFox~~~~~
New York City served as the hotspot for a deadly disease.
Consequently, the typical tourist traps were abandoned. Whether it be the Statue of Liberty, Times Square, Central Park, or even the World Trade Center. All had minimal activity. Exceptions came in the form of an amalgamation of low tech and high tech vehicles originating from both alien and human designs flying around the vicinity. Otherwise, the only other exciting sight came in the form of a massive ship descending upon the area, albeit it was one of many space-faring vessels in the modern era, and an alien within it gazed upon the empty streets from the safety of its reinforced hull.
"It looks like we might need to reschedule things…" said the alien as she stood from a terminal.
"Why's that?" asked a young male from her species.
"Because even human military forces are being isolated from civilians to contain the outbreak."
The alien made a dismissive gesture with his clawed hand. "It's not like we can catch it. So, we should be fine. Don't worry!"
"That might be true, Kav'ram, but we can still spread it. Our human allies have suffered enough as it is. If we intend to resume our mission of analyzing their various military capabilities for our own ends, certain precautions may become necessary to avoid putting their warriors in jeopardy."
"You worry too much, my battle sister!"
She scratched behind one of her black ears. "Look… I have no choice BUT to be worried. Being on human worlds always makes me feel so anxious since just one wrong step could hurt someone! Imagine acting like you're constantly walking on eggshells everywhere you go..."
"It's not that bad!" asserted Kav'ram with a swoosh of his tails. "You get used to it."
"... You've been on human worlds before?"
"Yeah!" he answered with both blonde tails wagging.
In return, the woman looked at him with disdain filling her emerald green eyes. "Why?"
"They can be fun! You should visit one at some point, Ami'mit."
"That's Warrant Officer Ami'mit to you, cadet."
He broke eye contact. "Ah, right…"
"Nonetheless, I don't really see the appeal. Especially from my experiences on their frontier worlds. What sort of entertainment could human planets possibly offer to creatures such as ourselves, anyway?"
Kav'ram formed a thinking man's pose. "Well… they have some hilarious shows!"
"Such as…?"
"OH! I just remembered a great one! It's a favorite of mine, and it stars a human scientist acting as the main character. There's this great episode where he… hehe… sorry!" The man paused to snicker. "He turns himself into a pickle! A FREAKING PICKLE! It was the funniest thing I've ever seen, I kid you not my battle sister!"
As the young man laughed hysterically, Ami'mit remained unamused. "Ah. That certainly sounds like the pinnacle of human comedy…"
"But that's not all!" he continued.
"We're wasting time, cadet. Back on topic. I want to know if you acquired all the necessary supplies and materials for the humans we're assessing."
Kav'ram raised a clawed finger. "No worries! I did some research and consulted with a few humans to acquire provisions specifically to cater to US Marines. Come and see!"
The man walked away with a flick of his tails, and the warrant officer sighed before following him. Soon, they approached some pallets on the floor. They contained various human foodstuffs, albeit the sizes of the pallets themselves barely went past their ankles. One colorful pallet, in particular, stood out from the otherwise dull MREs and their predominantly brown packaging…
"What in the name of the goddess is that, Kav'ram?"
"Crayons!" exclaimed the cadet. "Apparently, US Marines consider them a delicacy."
"...Really?"
"It should serve as a nice morale boost, don't you think?"
Ami'mit practically facepalmed. "Not necessarily, my battle brother… even humans would hesitate before eating something like that."
"Oh. Well, maybe it's a dessert...?"
The warrant officer shook her head. "Sure, it is. Regardless, you need to find the others to help move the supplies. We will land soon."
"On it!" he replied before saluting the woman and promptly departing the scene.
From there, the woman focused her attention on several nearby mechs...
Wolverine model mechs. There were four in total, and each stood somewhere around eighteen meters tall. Despite this, the aliens were still generally larger than them. The mechs definitely lived up to their names, however, due to the sheer amount of armor and weaponry adorning their mechanized forms. Whether it be shoulder-mounted rocket launchers, arm based cannons, or the equivalent of coaxial machine guns scattered across several vital locations… all of which were a result of joint design efforts between the two species.
Most importantly, each mech only required a single human pilot, unlike other war machines.
As Ami'mit inspected them, she made some final preparations by going through a mental checklist. "Let's just get this over with..." she said to nobody in particular.
Eventually, their ship made landfall near Brooklyn. Half a dozen alien soldiers hauled supplies or escorted mechs to the local Marine Reserve center as Ami'mit led the group at the front. They utilized a unique paved pathway created explicitly for their kind, and a communication device perched on her ear glowed green as it made sense of an otherwise incomprehensible transmission.
"It's about damn time that our beloved Joraxian allies showed up."
Ami'mit quickly spotted the raspy and masculine source, which was a human in yet another Wolverine model mech. He was standing near the entrance to the facility. Oddly enough, he was the only human present, albeit the only exception was a helicopter briefly flying overhead.
"Ah, yes…" said the warrant officer as her underlings entered the base itself, "And you're welcome for the supplies and other gifts that we're bestowing upon you today. Where are the other humans, exactly?"
The mech remained motionless. "What about 'em?"
"Typically, they like to line up in a formation to greet us for the sake of a tradition or ceremony I'm still familiarizing myself with."
"Oh, that. They're currently under pretty strict quarantine measures. The top brass is furious because it seems like all it's accomplishing is driving them mad..."
The woman swished her tails independently from one another. "Elaborate."
"Ugh. Where do I start?"
"Share any information you deem necessary, human."
The mech slowly moved one of its two legs to reposition itself. "Alright, but you asked for it. The boys got bored pretty quickly when this started and had a brawl in the barracks, which the military police had to break up. One also got drunk and fell down the stairs. Then they huddled around in a dark room to watch pornography together on a single laptop, but their commanding officer walked in on it. After that, some guy decided to shave his balls in the shower, got into a fight with an NCO over it, then heavily disciplined. Someone also pulled a knife on their roommate. So... a sergeant and like four corporals had to restrain the dude. Oh, and that same guy who shaved his balls decided to smear his shit in the showers as a form of protest, and I'm pretty sure at least half of the barracks has alcohol poisoning since they're talking about cracking down on the people bringing in booze…"
Ami'mit's nose scrunched up. "Um…"
"But that's not even the worst part! Some dude brought in like five soundbars and strategically placed them around the barracks. He started blasting... I'm a barbie girl, or whatever that song is called… while we were trying to sleep in the middle of the night. The dude also started screaming the lyrics. Poorly. Another guy went to fight him, their friends got involved, which turned into a brawl, then somehow the place got lit on fire during the ensuing frenzy…"
"I've heard enough!" interrupted Ami'mit with a light growl. "Is any of this going to impair our training exercise? If so, we can drop off our supplies and reschedule the session for the future."
"Nah, nah… no worries. Also, sorry if I got carried away, Ma'am."
Ami'mit pulled out a tablet. "You are forgiven, but now I have to see things for myself if they are as bad as you say they are."
"I'm not sure if that's a good idea..."
"Oh well." she replied with a shrug.
Without further delay, the warrant officer synced her device to one of the local networks. Her security clearances promptly granted her access. From there, her tablet allowed her to look directly through some security cameras, and a few screen swipes gave her a perfect view inside the local barracks built specifically for this occasion.
Ami'mit's ears folded against her head upon seeing the marines.
Unlike her own matriarchal species, the interior of the barracks appeared to be exclusively composed of males. They had hair on their heads instead of horns, flesh in the place of fur, and white sclera surrounding their irises rather than black ones. More concerningly, most were lined up against both sides of a hallway. This was all to watch two humans on each end of the hall, albeit they were both riding on top of another marine like a horse, and they came complete with strapped on pillows as if they were improvised armor, blankets being used as reins for their mounts, and brooms acting as the equivalent of lances.
The warrant officer watched with her jaw agape as one of the marines, a bizarre knight of sorts, shouted at the top of his lungs.
"My name is Carolus Rex! Commander of the fourth platoon. I'll be fighting for freedom in both this life and the next!"
He slammed a broom handle against the floor for emphasis. As a result, the crowd went wild as they whooped, shouted, and hollered. Some pulled out their smartphones to record the spectacle. Afterward, all eyes were on his opponent, a human with caramel-colored skin, and this rival adjusted his pillow helmet before puckering his lips and allowing his voice to fill the air.
"My name is Humphrey of the West, impregnator of wives and sucker of titties… AND YOU SHALL BE SMITED AS A HEATHEN!"
Once more, the assembled marines went into a frenzy by screaming as the two readied their brooms.
"CHARGE, my loyal steed!" commanded Carolus Rex.
Immediately, the two marine mounts crawled towards one another. They galloped like horses. A mix of shouting from the other marines and their riders striking their rears urged them to move faster. Before they came into contact, Carolus's so-called stead crawled a little too quickly, then collapsed to the floor. This allowed Humphrey of the West to easily knock Carolus Rex off his mount with the broom, securing his victory in the apparent jousting tournament as everyone went nuts.
"THE DAY IS MINE!" shouted Humphrey at the top of his lungs. alongside waving his broom in the air. "AAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!"
Meanwhile, Ami'mit found herself flabbergasted. "What sort of nonsense is this?" she asked before facing the human mech again. "They're acting like complete animals in there with their childish mock battles!" She paused to watch several other clearly intoxicated humans sharing a bottle of whiskey and laughing like madmen. "Ugh… is this how professional human warriors typically conduct themselves?"
"As I said, Ma'am, I think these quarantine measures might be driving some people crazy. They're just trying to have fun. I wouldn't… wait, where are you going?"
Ignoring the mech, Ami'mit strolled towards the nearby barracks with her fangs bared. Her sheer size, sharp claws, and scarlet red fur turned her into a building-sized demon as she left the pathway reserved for Joraxians and entered an area only meant for humans. The man in the mech momentarily chased after her, but his mechanical legs moved much more slowly compared to herself.
"Ma'am! You're going into a restricted zone!"
"I know." she replied with a flick of her tails.
The mech stopped walking for a moment. "Then, you know how dangerous that is, right?"
Ami'mit didn't bother with responding and left the mech behind. For a few moments, the woman carefully stepped around stray benches, light posts, trees, vehicles, and other random objects. She only stopped when she finally reached the barracks itself. Even without listening to the tablet, she could still hear whatever chaotic commotions were going on within the building, but a lone human man resting against a wall and holding an empty vodka bottle caught her attention first and foremost.
"Marine!" said Ami'mit with a snarl.
The drunken man recoiled at the sight of a massive alien looming overhead. He blinked several times. Afterward, he rubbed his eyes as the warrant officer went to a position of attention. Despite this, the man resumed phasing in and out reality as he wobbled in place and looked between himself, the whiskey bottle, and Ami'mit.
"What… uh, what do you want?" muttered the man.
"Potential brothers in arms!" she answered with a sneer. "You're supposed to be one of humanity's finest warriors. All human marines, regardless of their nation of origin, are prime candidates for our training program to create more outright space marines. Hence our assessments. Even if you're not fighting alongside us, you still need to be able to defend your own homeworld in case we can't protect you against someone trying to invade you again. Yet... I've been presented with nothing but drunken fools so far… not the sort of people I would trust with anything... much less my life."
"Get out of my light." said the drunk with a grunt.
The woman scoffed. "That's not how this works. I'm the one that gives orders!"
He waved his bottle and chuckled. "You can't tell me what to do, you skyscraper-sized slut!"
Before Ami'mit could react, a familiar voice shouted in the distance…
"HEY! She's not the size of a skyscraper!"
Glancing over her shoulder, the warrant officer spotted Kav'ram nearby. He was standing next to some other concerned Joraxian soldiers and staring at her with his wide, purple eyes. The sight inspired Ami'mit to close her own eyes as she sighed and spoke under her breath…
"Yeah. I'm done. I deal with enough idiots as it is... THE LAST THING WE NEED IS MINIATURE ONES!"
With that, the woman began walking back to the pathway. The drunken man eventually fell over as a direct result of her shouting. Unlike before, she completely disregarded her environment. Benches, bushes, and even a few bicycles were crushed by her combat boots, while some small stone structures such as a water fountain and a statue, were crumbled instead. With complete indifference to this sudden destruction, she returned to what amounted to the alien safety zone where the others awaited her.
"Did you really have to do that?" asked the man in the mech as he gazed upon the aftermath of her outburst. Although it only took a matter of seconds, it looked like a storm swept through the vicinity. The drunk man kept laughing and laughing as other marines departed the barracks to figure out what was going on, just to find themselves in shock at the sight of whatever happened outside.
"No." finally answered Ami'mit in a stone-cold tone. "I just stopped caring."
At her words, Kav'rum's tails drooped down. "Are you alright?"
"I'll be fine." she answered while looking at the distant humans with daggers in her eyes. "My bad. I... need to remember not to lose my temper." Ami'mit stopped speaking for several seconds to take a few deep breaths. "For now, we need to focus on getting the mechs back to our ship since it would be a waste of resources otherwise."
"What about the supplies?" he asked.
"Leave them. They're not worth the effort, and they probably need it. As I said, the mechs are far more valuable, and they'd be better spent training some more worthy human forces."
Kav'ram looked at the warrant officer in complete bewilderment as he tilted his head. "So… we're not doing the assessment, then?"
"Of course not! They've already failed as far as I'm concerned with their poor conduct. If they have strong feelings about my decision, perhaps they can request another assessment during the next solar cycle!"
After saying this, the warrant officer opened her tablet again and swiped through it until a checklist popped up on the screen. One prominent question appeared at the bottom...
Would you personally recommend this human unit for interstellar military training?
A clawed finger marked the checkbox stating a single word…
No
And so, the marines driven mad by a pandemic failed their first test, but they would only be one of many human military units undergoing a similar assessment… for better or worse.
Category Story / Macro / Micro
Species Canine (Other)
Size 120 x 120px
File Size 76.6 kB
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