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Artwork (Traditional) / Comics
Species Western Dragon
Size 884 x 1280
File Size 353.9 kB
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Next: https://www.furaffinity.net/view/36436303/
Previous: https://www.furaffinity.net/view/36426994/
First: https://www.furaffinity.net/view/36426994/
Story:
Soana, daughter of Jaques, will partake in this years trial after he refused to let her attempt it the last two years.
Some say he waited so long to avoid the shame of seeing her fail, least others see her talent has been overstated.
Some say he was hoping she'd learn to fly before earning her first mark.
Others...others say he wasn't planning on taking her at all, that he'd choose her sister instead after all those years.
Few have an inkling of the truth and even those didn't know what they saw until it was almost too late...
Characters:
Soana, 16 (9-10 in human years/HY) and protagonist of this story.
Vidal, 14 (8-9 HY), her competitor.
Jaques, her father and teacher in magic.
Sindri, ~26 (physical)//far too old (mentally), who knows what he's up to?
Nobody, that's who, not since his wife died.
Aron, the healer tasked with making sure nothing goes wrong. He could probably be more enthusiastic about his job.
A fair warning, this story will very likely be confusing the first time around.
Hmm, don't think I have much to mention here, except maybe the aforementioned inconsistencies with the colour schemes.
Something that will unfortunately carry over into the design of the arena a little due to the experimental nature of the comic. Object permanence isn't too huge a thing.
Another thing worth mentioning might be that these are photos as I drew them all in my sketchbook which has both a bad format for scanning and is generally quite cumbersome. The actual comic would involve scans, hopefully, but I hope the quality is okay for now.
Due to the nature of this comic and (likely) the next I will post I very much need as much criticism as I can get.
Is the writing hard to read, should the speech bubbles be coloured softer, is there a problem with the style or is there anything else that seems odd to you?
Anything about the layout of the description that can/should be changed?
Tell me.
Previous: https://www.furaffinity.net/view/36426994/
First: https://www.furaffinity.net/view/36426994/
Story:
Soana, daughter of Jaques, will partake in this years trial after he refused to let her attempt it the last two years.
Some say he waited so long to avoid the shame of seeing her fail, least others see her talent has been overstated.
Some say he was hoping she'd learn to fly before earning her first mark.
Others...others say he wasn't planning on taking her at all, that he'd choose her sister instead after all those years.
Few have an inkling of the truth and even those didn't know what they saw until it was almost too late...
Characters:
Soana, 16 (9-10 in human years/HY) and protagonist of this story.
Vidal, 14 (8-9 HY), her competitor.
Jaques, her father and teacher in magic.
Sindri, ~26 (physical)//far too old (mentally), who knows what he's up to?
Nobody, that's who, not since his wife died.
Aron, the healer tasked with making sure nothing goes wrong. He could probably be more enthusiastic about his job.
A fair warning, this story will very likely be confusing the first time around.
Hmm, don't think I have much to mention here, except maybe the aforementioned inconsistencies with the colour schemes.
Something that will unfortunately carry over into the design of the arena a little due to the experimental nature of the comic. Object permanence isn't too huge a thing.
Another thing worth mentioning might be that these are photos as I drew them all in my sketchbook which has both a bad format for scanning and is generally quite cumbersome. The actual comic would involve scans, hopefully, but I hope the quality is okay for now.
Due to the nature of this comic and (likely) the next I will post I very much need as much criticism as I can get.
Is the writing hard to read, should the speech bubbles be coloured softer, is there a problem with the style or is there anything else that seems odd to you?
Anything about the layout of the description that can/should be changed?
Tell me.
Category Artwork (Traditional) / Comics
Species Western Dragon
Size 884 x 1280px
File Size 353.9 kB
Listed in Folders
I think there may be a bit of a mistake here, I know what Spore is, but this is very much my personal headworld that was kind of inspired by Spyro way back in the day.
But still, thanks for the comment. I still have over 30 pages left to upload, so if you don't mind it not being Spore I'd be glad if you stick around.
But still, thanks for the comment. I still have over 30 pages left to upload, so if you don't mind it not being Spore I'd be glad if you stick around.
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