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The Play - a Thursday Prompt (reloaded)
sorry for the distraction, but there was a glitch and the file had to be re-submitted.
this one is interactive, so read and then add your part - mind - only clean jokes to be added...
V.
this one is interactive, so read and then add your part - mind - only clean jokes to be added...
V.
Category Story / All
Species Unspecified / Any
Size 111 x 120px
File Size 52.5 kB
Notice this is a play – and a trap
1) Dan, a hamster in a pink suit
2) James, a Doberman in normal punk rock attire
Dee) A black sun dress, with an off center white stripe.
2) Dan, *cough* Do you have any fours?
1) No. Go fish.
Dee) (an all fours, acting as a table) I do! (floating some more she gives her hands and feet to James)
1) Dan, a hamster in a pink suit
2) James, a Doberman in normal punk rock attire
Dee) A black sun dress, with an off center white stripe.
2) Dan, *cough* Do you have any fours?
1) No. Go fish.
Dee) (an all fours, acting as a table) I do! (floating some more she gives her hands and feet to James)
(*So I didn't follow your directions to a T :p , but this picks up right where you left off!)
2. (Groans, and takes a hard look at Dee. Turns to 1.) "Well, unlike you, at least she shows some potential."
1. "What?! You wouldn't know comedy if it bit you in the butt."
(Dee nips 2 in the butt)
2. "OW!!! That's not funny!"
1. "See? But I can fix that." (scrunches his eyes up)
2. "There's nothing to fix, what you call 'jokes' are just... oh, now what?"
(Spotlight on a new figure, who stretches up, and walks over to the group.)
New Guy. "This fellow," (places hand on 1's shoulder), "is a first-class comedian."
1. (smug) "Why thank you."
2. (to New Guy) "And just who do you think you are?"
New Guy. "I am You Two."
2. "But you look nothing like me! You can't be me, too."
You Two. "I'm not Me Two. You are you, and you can call me You Two."
Dee. (grinning stupidly) "You guys have the same name? Wow, what a coincidence!"
2. (Facepalms. Looks at Dee, then turns to 1.) "I suppose you imagined him, too."
1. "You Two. He said his name was You Two."
Dee. "Oh, I love your music! Can I have your autograph?"
2. (Groans, and takes a hard look at Dee. Turns to 1.) "Well, unlike you, at least she shows some potential."
1. "What?! You wouldn't know comedy if it bit you in the butt."
(Dee nips 2 in the butt)
2. "OW!!! That's not funny!"
1. "See? But I can fix that." (scrunches his eyes up)
2. "There's nothing to fix, what you call 'jokes' are just... oh, now what?"
(Spotlight on a new figure, who stretches up, and walks over to the group.)
New Guy. "This fellow," (places hand on 1's shoulder), "is a first-class comedian."
1. (smug) "Why thank you."
2. (to New Guy) "And just who do you think you are?"
New Guy. "I am You Two."
2. "But you look nothing like me! You can't be me, too."
You Two. "I'm not Me Two. You are you, and you can call me You Two."
Dee. (grinning stupidly) "You guys have the same name? Wow, what a coincidence!"
2. (Facepalms. Looks at Dee, then turns to 1.) "I suppose you imagined him, too."
1. "You Two. He said his name was You Two."
Dee. "Oh, I love your music! Can I have your autograph?"
Well,
1 will be a peculiar owl dressed in very Lincoln~esque attire and will be named Stoppard.
2 will be brave looking mouse and will be named Jennings dressed in a white dress suit with dress pants, but no coat.
Dee will be enacting a chair for Jennings to sit on.
The joke:
(Stoppard with boyish eagerness beckons Jennings, his press secretary, into the room).
Jennings: Mr. Stoppard, you sent for me?
Stoppard: Yes, Jennings. Come in. Sit down.
Jennings: Yes, Mr. Stoppard?
Stoppard: (Unable to suppress a grin) I want to discuss an idea.
Jennings: Of course, sir.
Stoppard: Next time we have a conference for the gentlemen of the press . .
Jennings: Yessir . . .?
Stoppard: When I take questions
Jennings: Yes, Mr. Stoppard . . .?
Stoppard: You raise your hand and ask me: Mr. Stoppard, how long do you think a man’s legs should be?
Jennings: Pardon me?
Stoppard: You ask me: how long do I think a man’s legs should be?
Jennings: May I ask why, sir?
Stoppard: Why? Because I have a very good answer.
Jennings: You do?
Stoppard: Long enough to reach the ground.
Jennings: Excuse me?
Stoppard: Long enough to reach the ground. That’s the answer! Get it? How long do you think a man’s legs should be? Long enough to reach the ground!
Jennings: I see.
Stoppard: You don’t think it’s funny?
Jennings: May I be frank, Mr. Stoppard?
Stoppard: (Annoyed) Well, I got a big laugh with it today.
Jennings: Really?
Stoppard: Absolutely. I was with the cabinet and some friends and a man asked it and I shot back that answer and the whole room broke up.
Jennings: May I ask, Mr. Stoppard, in what context did he ask it?
Stoppard: Pardon me?
Jennings: Were you discussing anatomy? Was the man a surgeon or a sculptor?
Stoppard: Why-er-no-I-I-don’t think so. No. A simple farmer, I believe.
Jennings: Well, why did he want to know?
Stoppard: Well, I don’t know. All I know is he was someone who had requested an audience with me urgently . .
Jennings: (Concerned) I see.
Stoppard: What is it, Jennings, you look pale?
Jennings: It is a rather odd question.
Stoppard: Yes, but I got a laugh off it. It was a quick answer.
Jennings: No one’s denying that, Mr. Stoppard.
Stoppard: A big laugh. The whole cabinet just broke up.
Jennings: And then did the man say anything?
Stoppard: He said thank you and left.
Jennings: You never asked why he wanted to know?
Stoppard: If you must know, I was too pleased with my answer. Long enough to reach the ground. It came out so fast. I didn’t hesitate.
(Dee jumps up Jennings falls, Stoppard laughs like crazy, curtain closes as he high-fives Dee)
1 will be a peculiar owl dressed in very Lincoln~esque attire and will be named Stoppard.
2 will be brave looking mouse and will be named Jennings dressed in a white dress suit with dress pants, but no coat.
Dee will be enacting a chair for Jennings to sit on.
The joke:
(Stoppard with boyish eagerness beckons Jennings, his press secretary, into the room).
Jennings: Mr. Stoppard, you sent for me?
Stoppard: Yes, Jennings. Come in. Sit down.
Jennings: Yes, Mr. Stoppard?
Stoppard: (Unable to suppress a grin) I want to discuss an idea.
Jennings: Of course, sir.
Stoppard: Next time we have a conference for the gentlemen of the press . .
Jennings: Yessir . . .?
Stoppard: When I take questions
Jennings: Yes, Mr. Stoppard . . .?
Stoppard: You raise your hand and ask me: Mr. Stoppard, how long do you think a man’s legs should be?
Jennings: Pardon me?
Stoppard: You ask me: how long do I think a man’s legs should be?
Jennings: May I ask why, sir?
Stoppard: Why? Because I have a very good answer.
Jennings: You do?
Stoppard: Long enough to reach the ground.
Jennings: Excuse me?
Stoppard: Long enough to reach the ground. That’s the answer! Get it? How long do you think a man’s legs should be? Long enough to reach the ground!
Jennings: I see.
Stoppard: You don’t think it’s funny?
Jennings: May I be frank, Mr. Stoppard?
Stoppard: (Annoyed) Well, I got a big laugh with it today.
Jennings: Really?
Stoppard: Absolutely. I was with the cabinet and some friends and a man asked it and I shot back that answer and the whole room broke up.
Jennings: May I ask, Mr. Stoppard, in what context did he ask it?
Stoppard: Pardon me?
Jennings: Were you discussing anatomy? Was the man a surgeon or a sculptor?
Stoppard: Why-er-no-I-I-don’t think so. No. A simple farmer, I believe.
Jennings: Well, why did he want to know?
Stoppard: Well, I don’t know. All I know is he was someone who had requested an audience with me urgently . .
Jennings: (Concerned) I see.
Stoppard: What is it, Jennings, you look pale?
Jennings: It is a rather odd question.
Stoppard: Yes, but I got a laugh off it. It was a quick answer.
Jennings: No one’s denying that, Mr. Stoppard.
Stoppard: A big laugh. The whole cabinet just broke up.
Jennings: And then did the man say anything?
Stoppard: He said thank you and left.
Jennings: You never asked why he wanted to know?
Stoppard: If you must know, I was too pleased with my answer. Long enough to reach the ground. It came out so fast. I didn’t hesitate.
(Dee jumps up Jennings falls, Stoppard laughs like crazy, curtain closes as he high-fives Dee)
I thought it was cute... and Jeeves - I think the title was 'Life with Jeeves' was a book series. I think they also did it as a movie.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jeeves
V.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jeeves
V.
I'll see if I'll be able to get a hold of the texts when all this protest nonsense ends.
All this talk of butlers reminded me of a fairly old act called Dinner for One
http://www.youtube.com/watch#!v=eUbEVg5KNt8 (the thing starts at around 2:26 before that the guy is describing the scene in German, but the thing's in English, part one of the latter)
http://www.youtube.com/watch#!v=GAUFMWaAb5M (part two of the former)
It has James the butler, I recommend it, it's quite fun to look at!
A book series, well, that was quite a faux pas... I hope you forgive my ignorance on the matter! I'm more apt with more classical literature (pre 1900's).
All this talk of butlers reminded me of a fairly old act called Dinner for One
http://www.youtube.com/watch#!v=eUbEVg5KNt8 (the thing starts at around 2:26 before that the guy is describing the scene in German, but the thing's in English, part one of the latter)
http://www.youtube.com/watch#!v=GAUFMWaAb5M (part two of the former)
It has James the butler, I recommend it, it's quite fun to look at!
A book series, well, that was quite a faux pas... I hope you forgive my ignorance on the matter! I'm more apt with more classical literature (pre 1900's).
*giggles*
Talk about reader participation! This is much better than me asking random words of my readers...
Mmm, let's see what I can do here.
1) is a sour-looking bloodhound, complete with the drooping eyes behind a pair of large glasses. His name is Hilary. (With one L, that is actually used as a male name sometimes; think Hilary Minster who played General Von Klinkerhoffen in 'Allo 'Allo)
2) is a rough-furred dog of indetermined breed; most likely a mutt, but with a bit of resemblance to an Old English sheepdog. His name is Arthur.
They are both wearing somewhat worn and faded Varsity variety costumes; you know, candy-cane striped pants and jackets over a white shirt and straw hats. Costumes they probably swiped from their grandfather's vaudeville days.
Dee is wearing a Marylin Monroe-esque dress with lace frills that are not all there anymore, a hat with a faded feather in it, and no shoes.
To pick up where you stopped:
Director: Cut! You have to do better than that, guys!
Hilary: I give up. I didn't want to do this in the first place.
Arthur: Okay, I know a better joke.
Hilary (sarcastic): Oh really? Stop the presses.
(Dee giggles)
Arthur: What is red and smells like blue paint?
Hilary (points at Dee): Her feet?
Dee: Hey! I resent that!
Hilary: And I resent your feet.
(cough from the director. Hilary shrugs and looks at Arthur)
Hilary: Okay, I'll bite. So what is red and smells like blue paint?
Arthur: Red paint!
*giggles*
Okay, okay, I know... not a very original joke. It's not mine, I'll admit that
*hugs the vixen (not Dee, Vixyy)*
This was really fun, darling!
Talk about reader participation! This is much better than me asking random words of my readers...
Mmm, let's see what I can do here.
1) is a sour-looking bloodhound, complete with the drooping eyes behind a pair of large glasses. His name is Hilary. (With one L, that is actually used as a male name sometimes; think Hilary Minster who played General Von Klinkerhoffen in 'Allo 'Allo)
2) is a rough-furred dog of indetermined breed; most likely a mutt, but with a bit of resemblance to an Old English sheepdog. His name is Arthur.
They are both wearing somewhat worn and faded Varsity variety costumes; you know, candy-cane striped pants and jackets over a white shirt and straw hats. Costumes they probably swiped from their grandfather's vaudeville days.
Dee is wearing a Marylin Monroe-esque dress with lace frills that are not all there anymore, a hat with a faded feather in it, and no shoes.
To pick up where you stopped:
Director: Cut! You have to do better than that, guys!
Hilary: I give up. I didn't want to do this in the first place.
Arthur: Okay, I know a better joke.
Hilary (sarcastic): Oh really? Stop the presses.
(Dee giggles)
Arthur: What is red and smells like blue paint?
Hilary (points at Dee): Her feet?
Dee: Hey! I resent that!
Hilary: And I resent your feet.
(cough from the director. Hilary shrugs and looks at Arthur)
Hilary: Okay, I'll bite. So what is red and smells like blue paint?
Arthur: Red paint!
*giggles*
Okay, okay, I know... not a very original joke. It's not mine, I'll admit that
*hugs the vixen (not Dee, Vixyy)*
This was really fun, darling!
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