pretty good story never read a furry apocalypse story before but it was pretty good. interesting and left me wanting to know what happens next

Thank you for reading! I really appreciate your comments. :) Some of the story can also be followed in the comic which I have to get back to posting, and there are plans for more. ;)

Huh. Okay, caught your note about this, and apparently something glitched. I don't think I ever got the notification that it was posted, and I've got both your channels on Watch.

Nice setup to the situation. Fallout vibes, of course, but it's hard not to do that with this sort of setup - the idea goes WAY back, a book I bought in the late 60's... the lights had failed in such a facility, and the inhabitants were divided between people using echolocation and those evolving to see infrared.

Hate the limited time for repairs.... First one I saw was a book I bought in the late 60's, etc...

Yeah, you usually read my stuff, which I do appreciate, by the way. Anyway, I definitely do cite Fallout (the series) as one of the reasons I wanted to write in the post apocalyptic genre, and while the Sanctuary is inspired by the Vaults, I have since crafted a largely unique setting to distinguish it from its fannish origins. While still inspiring me in some ways, it definitely is a different world.

In the case of my story I wanted the war to have occurred much more recently so as to make the prewar tech still functional much more plausible. In addition a few other things have popped up in my various tweaks.

In any case, I'm glad you liked it. ;)

I really like what you've done with this. You see a lot of similar large shelters in apocalyptic and post-apocalyptic fiction, but most of the time you get no more than glimpses of them. They're where the protagonist starts before he's sent out into the wilderness, or they're found in ruins after he's been out there for a while. I don't remember any other story focusing on the daunting task of running such a facility, or making the head of the facility the central character. It certainly makes for a refreshing change, and I like that she's such a sympathetic character, too, rather than your typical obstructive bureaucrat. The scene between Alison and Kieran, where he's preparing to leave, was especially well done, and rather touching. You write couples and romantic scenes very well.

I liked the brief excursion outside and how it set up the danger this new world presents, and the intriguing mystery, without giving too much away. It makes you want to know more about what's happening in the world, supplemented by the brief contact with HQ, and thus makes Kieran's desire to go see what's going on much more sympathetic and compelling. But at the same time, it makes Alison's position stronger, too. I definitely liked that there were strong arguments for both of them, and neither were set up to be entirely right or entirely wrong. That can be rather tricky at times, as I know so very well.

You did a good job of handling the transitions between past events and present ones very smoothly, and I enjoyed the opening particularly. My writing critique group has argued endlessly over whether or not it was acceptable to begin a story with a dream, and I almost wish I could show them this because you do it very well.

Great work all around! I know I'm super slow at commenting, but I always enjoy reading your work and the worlds you have built are endlessly fascinating!

I had the idea when I was looking for smaller projects to do, so I figured filling in the gaps would be a good use of shorter pieces like this. We meet Alison briefly in the comic, but I wanted to expand more on those characters and it seemed like an interesting idea to cover the before, during, and after of being inside one of those shelters. It's also one of the first times I've really experimented with nonlinear storytelling, with events quite clearly being out of sequence, but in this case I think it worked to dramatic effect, to contrast the different points of time in the narrative. The scene where he leaves was partly informed by their reunion in the comic, where it was clear they had a history, so I wanted to make sure that it was shown in the story as well.

It was important that there be a clear difference of opinion between them to coincide with her reaction when he returns, simultaneously glad to see him and wanting to (metaphorically) kill him. In such a scenario when you lack decent information you have to make educated guesses, and clearly they both had reasonable arguments, but perhaps what is most compelling is that you can see both of them. The desire to know and the call for caution. Both are potentially smart decisions, but in the case such as here when you cannot do both, it only adds to the drama when she chooses her responsibility to her charges while he chooses his need to know over her.

Most of the time I write fairly linearly, but in this case it just seemed like a good idea to jump around, to contrast her frame of mind at different points. And you can share this with them if you think they'd like it/find it useful. As far as starting with a dream, I'm of the mind that it is okay as long as you learn something from it. A dream should not be used just to do something you know isn't real (as is often the case on TV), but as here, it starts just like a normal day. It is entirely believable and relatable so you don't suspect it's anything other than truth until Alison does. Soon she comes to the realization that this is not reality, but a memory of sorts, and then you are placed in the same situation, where both she and the audience are suddenly tossed into stark reality.

Thank you so much for the comment. I do so value your feedback.

Oh, I definitely agree that you have to be careful how you use dreams in stories, especially starting with one. It's not something you want to do for the sake of it, but because it adds something to the story. The way you handled it is, I think, a great example of how it can work to great effect, though I do think that the non-linear style of the story, in general, helps with that a great deal.

Speaking of, that's also a hard thing to pull off, and one you did very well. Every section fits and moves the story along, and they all make sense within themselves and within the greater context of the story as well. You have a lot to be proud of with this story.

And it's my pleasure. I might be slow as Christmas, but I very much enjoy reading your work and I'm glad I can be of some small help to you, too.

Most cases I advise against it since you don't have a benchmark by which to evaluate the dream, but in cases like this it serves to only heighten the contrast between past and present, which informs the reader about how Alison's world has changed in just a few short years. Were any of us to be in a similar situation I know I would dream of the world before.

Non linear storytelling is a complex tool, but here I think it worked better than telling the story straight through, as it highlighted the vastly different scenarios encountered before and after the lockdown.

I always do love your comments. They help a lot.