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The New Guy
A Thursday Prompt story
© 2020 by Walter Reimer
Prompt: graceless inadequacy
“Hi, Kay!” The squirrel femme’s ears twitched at the sound of her name being called over the music and other people in the bar, and she grinned as she saw her friend Gina making her way through the crowd.
Kay pulled her purse out of the seat beside her. She’d been saving it for the corgi, after all. “Gina! Glad you could make it.”
The bartender drew near, and Gina said, “Appletini, please,” before she heaved a sigh and gave her friend a weary look. “I’m so glad you called me, Kay. It’s been a rough week.”
“Which is it this time?” the squirrel asked before taking a sip of her margarita. “The students or the School Board?”
The corgi groaned. “Those idiots are talking about intelligent design. Again.” Her ears flicked at some shouting over the music and she half-turned in her seat as the bartender arrived with her drink. The appletini immediately caught her attention and she said to the doe behind the bar, “I’ll run a tab, Mae.” She took a long sip of the drink, sighed, and glanced at Gina as the squirrel chuckled. “What?”
“Take a look,” Gina said, pointing at the dance floor. Kay turned, and almost spat out the drink she’d just taken.
In the middle of the crowd was a gangly canine who was making a valiant attempt at dancing to the music. “Dear God,” Kay said, “what is – he looks like he’s having a seizure and a stroke at the same time.”
“You should have seen him earlier,” Gina said, nodding to two women at the far end of the bar. One of them shook her head.
“Fail!” the other one called out.
“I know,” Gina said, “but it’s necessary. Anyway,” she said to Kay, “that guy’s been here for about an hour.”
“That long? No one called 911?” Kay winced as Gina laughed. “I haven’t seen him around here. That dancing’s hard on the eyes.”
“Be thankful you’re just watching him,” the squirrel said. “I had to listen to him.”
“Oh? Tried to sweet-talk you?”
“Heh. Yeah. He’s actually not bad-looking, but holy shit.” Gina signaled for another margarita. “He started saying the usual things, and we actually got a conversation going. That’s when it – thanks, Mae – that’s when it started.” She sipped at her drink, licking at the salted rim. “He assured me that he wasn’t going to buy me a drink because it was a ‘bad investment.’”
“No.”
Gina raised a finger. “Truth. Then he starts going on about how he’s worked hard to get a good job and makes good money, and isn’t going to waste it by trying to buy a woman’s interest.”
Kay blinked and looked back at the dance floor. The canine had ceded the field, and was at a table by himself, downing a shot of something.
“Oh, he said worse than that, I’ll tell you. But here comes the best part,” the squirrel told the corgi. “Erik – that’s his name, Erik ‘with a K,’ as he put it – starts complaining that he can’t get a woman in a serious relationship with him – “
“With that attitude, I shouldn’t wonder.”
“ – And follows that up with saying that if people are so insistent on ‘equality’ and the government redistributing wealth, then government should give men like him women,” and Gina took a drink while Kay watched her with a look of disbelieving horror on her muzzle. “You can ask around,” the squirrel said. “He’s said the same shit to a few girls. What?”
Kay was looking at the dance floor. She took a swig of her appletini and nodded. “Have a look.”
Gina looked, and did a double take. Erik-with-a-K was back out on the floor, this time talking with a shapely skunk femme with well-brushed fur.
The squirrel’s jaw fell open. “He’s trying to hook up with Sally.”
“Uh-huh. She hasn’t sprayed anyone lately.”
“She might just break her streak tonight, if he starts talking to her.” Gina nudged Kay with an elbow. “Should we stay and watch what happens?”
The corgi femme took a sip of her drink as the canine talked to Sally, his paws moving as he made his points. He hadn’t noticed that the mephitess was stamping her feet and her tail was starting to cock.
Kay pursed her lips, judging the angle and distance.
“Sure.”
end
A Thursday Prompt story
© 2020 by Walter Reimer
Prompt: graceless inadequacy
“Hi, Kay!” The squirrel femme’s ears twitched at the sound of her name being called over the music and other people in the bar, and she grinned as she saw her friend Gina making her way through the crowd.
Kay pulled her purse out of the seat beside her. She’d been saving it for the corgi, after all. “Gina! Glad you could make it.”
The bartender drew near, and Gina said, “Appletini, please,” before she heaved a sigh and gave her friend a weary look. “I’m so glad you called me, Kay. It’s been a rough week.”
“Which is it this time?” the squirrel asked before taking a sip of her margarita. “The students or the School Board?”
The corgi groaned. “Those idiots are talking about intelligent design. Again.” Her ears flicked at some shouting over the music and she half-turned in her seat as the bartender arrived with her drink. The appletini immediately caught her attention and she said to the doe behind the bar, “I’ll run a tab, Mae.” She took a long sip of the drink, sighed, and glanced at Gina as the squirrel chuckled. “What?”
“Take a look,” Gina said, pointing at the dance floor. Kay turned, and almost spat out the drink she’d just taken.
In the middle of the crowd was a gangly canine who was making a valiant attempt at dancing to the music. “Dear God,” Kay said, “what is – he looks like he’s having a seizure and a stroke at the same time.”
“You should have seen him earlier,” Gina said, nodding to two women at the far end of the bar. One of them shook her head.
“Fail!” the other one called out.
“I know,” Gina said, “but it’s necessary. Anyway,” she said to Kay, “that guy’s been here for about an hour.”
“That long? No one called 911?” Kay winced as Gina laughed. “I haven’t seen him around here. That dancing’s hard on the eyes.”
“Be thankful you’re just watching him,” the squirrel said. “I had to listen to him.”
“Oh? Tried to sweet-talk you?”
“Heh. Yeah. He’s actually not bad-looking, but holy shit.” Gina signaled for another margarita. “He started saying the usual things, and we actually got a conversation going. That’s when it – thanks, Mae – that’s when it started.” She sipped at her drink, licking at the salted rim. “He assured me that he wasn’t going to buy me a drink because it was a ‘bad investment.’”
“No.”
Gina raised a finger. “Truth. Then he starts going on about how he’s worked hard to get a good job and makes good money, and isn’t going to waste it by trying to buy a woman’s interest.”
Kay blinked and looked back at the dance floor. The canine had ceded the field, and was at a table by himself, downing a shot of something.
“Oh, he said worse than that, I’ll tell you. But here comes the best part,” the squirrel told the corgi. “Erik – that’s his name, Erik ‘with a K,’ as he put it – starts complaining that he can’t get a woman in a serious relationship with him – “
“With that attitude, I shouldn’t wonder.”
“ – And follows that up with saying that if people are so insistent on ‘equality’ and the government redistributing wealth, then government should give men like him women,” and Gina took a drink while Kay watched her with a look of disbelieving horror on her muzzle. “You can ask around,” the squirrel said. “He’s said the same shit to a few girls. What?”
Kay was looking at the dance floor. She took a swig of her appletini and nodded. “Have a look.”
Gina looked, and did a double take. Erik-with-a-K was back out on the floor, this time talking with a shapely skunk femme with well-brushed fur.
The squirrel’s jaw fell open. “He’s trying to hook up with Sally.”
“Uh-huh. She hasn’t sprayed anyone lately.”
“She might just break her streak tonight, if he starts talking to her.” Gina nudged Kay with an elbow. “Should we stay and watch what happens?”
The corgi femme took a sip of her drink as the canine talked to Sally, his paws moving as he made his points. He hadn’t noticed that the mephitess was stamping her feet and her tail was starting to cock.
Kay pursed her lips, judging the angle and distance.
“Sure.”
end
Category Story / General Furry Art
Species Squirrel
Size 120 x 92px
File Size 38.7 kB
Listed in Folders
Why is it female skunks are always 'Sally'? (and they like to spray away problems?)
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/16962969/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/16962969/
My Sally comes from this story, back in 2018: https://www.furaffinity.net/view/29348517/
She doesn't spray (in my headcanon, skunks are carefully taught that it's bad manners), but she's lately fallen in with a badger who has a bit of a fetish about skunks . . .
She doesn't spray (in my headcanon, skunks are carefully taught that it's bad manners), but she's lately fallen in with a badger who has a bit of a fetish about skunks . . .
Well, me 'rewrite' started in 2012 https://www.furaffinity.net/view/7846641/ but the first half of the story was up on Goldfur's den in 2008.
And agreed on the 'bad manners'. She (and other skunks) don't 'spray' just for the heck of it, but I kinda assumed they have to relieve pressure every so often to help prevent them from leaking. (I'd think it'd be a normal and everyday thing like women handling their periods; small cheap package with one treated pad they hold to their rumps and spray into, second smaller one to clean/descent any stray drops, fold into the bag and drop into the trash.)
Ah, the fun in figuring out the backstories ...
And agreed on the 'bad manners'. She (and other skunks) don't 'spray' just for the heck of it, but I kinda assumed they have to relieve pressure every so often to help prevent them from leaking. (I'd think it'd be a normal and everyday thing like women handling their periods; small cheap package with one treated pad they hold to their rumps and spray into, second smaller one to clean/descent any stray drops, fold into the bag and drop into the trash.)
Ah, the fun in figuring out the backstories ...
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