We don't know each other but I wish your things get better!

Hopefully it does.. thanks seriously it means a lot.

*hugs*

I'm sorry it happened, but use this pain to become a better person. Making mistakes is how we learn to be better. Now You have to "swallow that frog", which means suffer through those very bad feelings. Try to understand what hurt the other person's feelings and try not to panic. Don't come from a place of self-hate because it will make Your thinking self-centered and it will be easy to miss the point of why did the person You hurt felt that way. You hating Yourself is normal, but the other person should not be bothered with it. After You had Your personal moment of grief, calm down and reflect. If the other person is willing to talk You can ask them to tell You what hurt them and then You can apologize and try to change Your behaviour. And Your drawing ability has nothing to do with it.

Okay, I will try. Yes its just right now I guess I'm a bit emotionally charged so I'll just try to give myself a moment. I apologized earlier so I hope they respond soon. Being that I live alone I don't have any friends to vent to and thus why we get posts like this... But thanks for the advice, this community and people like you are MORE than helpful in situations and I really am grateful.

Be ok with them not responding and try not to write them again until they answer. That's a common mistake. They call it "the illusion of need of action". We are in pain so we need validation as fast as possible, but it's not a good impulse to act on. For now go through Your feelings, which are normal and we all have them and then once You are more down reflect on what happened without the baggage of self-hatred, cause it is a bad and egocentric advisor. Good luck <3

Gotcha... You make a good therapist I just wanted to tell ya. Very helpful words

It's mostly that I've myself done a lot of stupid shit through my life so I have the benefit of experience XD