Built to a Price
A Thursday Prompt story
© 2021 by Walter Reimer


Prompt: cheap


The sun rose over the town of Merryvale on the day after the annual fair and tournament ended. On one of the outlying farms, a rooster crowed, greeting the morning.

“Henry!” his mother shouted. “Stop that noise this instant and get in here for your breakfast!”

The rooster flinched and said, “Coming, Mother,” as he closed his bedroom window.

Unfortunately, young Henry’s exuberant crowing was not the only discordant sound piercing the morning calm of Merryvale, if the cracked screaming coming from the local wizard’s shop was any indication.

The sign over the shop read MERLIN, with the ‘L’ crossed out and a ‘V’ written over it. Other signs arrayed around the door frame included one in rather crabbed calligraphy proclaiming Curses Dispelled – Negotiable Hourly Rates. Another described the hours of the shop’s operation and a third read Certified Mad Alchemist, to which some cheeky youngster had scrawled Boo! as if to punctuate this particular achievement.

Another scream erupted from inside the building, followed by a hoarse voice sobbing. This came from an athletically-built wolf wearing armor. He looked somewhat uncomfortable in the collection of mail and plate steel, only partly because he was suspended by a rope harness from the ceiling.

The lance he was currently impaled on might have contributed to his discomfort.

“It went right through me,” he asserted.

The Great Wizard Mervin (a title which, it must be said, took several years in university, several more years of apprenticeship and a two-year certification process to acquire) looked out from under the still-sobbing lupine. The weedy-looking stallion had left his official wizard hat and robe draped over a chair on the far side of the room, and was wearing a set of grimy coveralls. “Well, all magic armor acts like this – when it’s new,” he remarked, idly sticking his wand down his coveralls and using it to scratch himself.

What the wand thought of this indignity is not recorded, but the wolf said, “Straight through.”

“Yeah, well, it’s meant to give a little with the body – “

“It just went straight through.” the unfortunate lupine’s squire, a scruffy-looking raccoon wearing a second-paw doublet said. “And now Sir Ranulph wants his lance back.”

“Tell him to keep his codpiece on,” Mervin said testily. He ducked back under the wolf, waving his wand while muttering under his breath. The equine poked his head back out and looked up at the would-be knight. “Did you get the warranty?”

The wolf sniffled, “What?”

“You bought this from Nedward the Insane, yes? I see his mark on the tasset.”

“Oh, um, yeah. Really good price.”

“Uh huh.” The stallion gave him a skeptical look. “Nice low price, right?”

“Yeah, but what – “

“How do you think he can get away with selling magic armor that low?” Mervin demanded. “Now, did you get the warranty?”

“N-No, he said – “

The horse gave a disgusted snort. “Okay. I can fix this, but without the warranty it’ll cost you.”

“H-How m-much?” the wolf quavered.

“Just be thankful I’m not asking for an arm and a leg,” and the Great Wizard Mervin started to trace cabalistic signs in the air with his wand as he began the spell.


end