Pretty nice story you wrote there. ^^ All the important information, no unnecessary extras, simple plot to process. I like it! There were few flaws tho. For example I would recommend you writing in paragraphs. The text will then look more presentable and inviting for reader. Or so I believe. There were few grammar and formal flaws but nothing too serious to break experience. Those are more about time invested into grammar checks and such. That takes time and exercise. ^^ Also, if you look to write lengthier stories then I would recommend adding more description to characters, process of gains and maybe slight description of surroundings. Don´t need to be fancy, but it can easily get you few more lines if that´s what you seek. Keep up the good work tho! Looking forward to read some more stories from you! ^^