In an alternate universe slightly to the right, a mouse rules Dunia and a lioness tries his patience... Its one of those topsy turvey universes where everything we know is wrong.

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King Leopold the Brave - Uniter of Dunia, Victor of the Battle of Shame Bay, father and protector of his people, three time winner of Most Swoon-Worthy Arms at the annual Seven Kingdoms Banquet - was sick and tired of waking up to find Jasiri rummaging in his dressers.

Being abashed at being caught would be the least she could do but as he sat up in his bed and matched gazes with the mini-lioness as she stuffed underpants into a burlap sack with a butt crudely painted onto it, a prize pair taking the honored position of being worn on her head like a hat, she grinned widely at him and winked.

"Jasiri," he said in reply, shaking his head.

"Hey your royal handsomeness! I'm not Jasiri, I'm your butler, here to help you get dressed."

She was indeed wearing a name tag that said BUTLER on it. He could almost admire her initiative if she hadn't spelled it with two t's.

"You're supposed to be in the dungeon, Jasiri."

"You never visit me so I came to visit you." She looked over the shape of his body under the sheets. "You wouldn't happen to need any morning relief under there?"

"No, Jasiri," King Leopold said. He got out of bed, covering himself with a dressing gown. Rather than call in his valet and have Jasiri startle the old man, Leopold went behind the dressing screen and dressed himself. Jasiri tried to peek behind the screen but he dropped the gown over her head.

"Come with me," he commanded, as she extricated herself.

"With you, kingy? Anywhere! (Although we both know its going to be back to the dungeon)"

He didn't take her right to the dungeon. Instead, he had the dungeon guards brought to him.

"Killers and thieves and spies rot away in my dungeons while waiting their justice. But this mini-lioness gets the better of you time after time after time. When last I locked her away, I personally made sure that she was securely fashioned with sturdy chains. Care to explain how she got out this time?"

The five guards began to weave a conflicting tale as they kept interrupting and talking over each other, a story of a tricky lion and poor, benighted prison guards who were no match for her wits and wiles.

One guard suggested that Jasiri never actually got out of the dungeons, she had just convinced everyone that she had.

"Do not believe her lies about easily escaping the dungeon, my liege! She's lion! Er, lying!"

Reading between the lines, Leopold suspected that Jasiri had complained that the chains were too tight and gotten the guards to remove them. A simple ruse for some simple rubes.

"I, King Leopold the Brave, can attest that you should not trust a word that comes from her mouth," he agreed, having fallen for her ruses himself a few times. "However, this has been the sixth time she has escaped my dungeon to get to my royal undergarments. You men are fired."

He sent them to clean out their dungeon desks.

"I'm meeting my court witch for breakfast," he warned Jasiri as she started squeezing his royal buns. He let her stand behind him, that was his mistake. "Maybe I'll see to it that she shrinks you down to no more than three apples tall."

"Nah, Leona loves me," Jasiri said. The mini-lioness had a point insofar as his sister was amused by her antics. "But I'll suggest that she shrink you down so we can finally do something with all of this sexual tension."

"I don't think that likely."

"Well, how about breakfast then? I can't make my stirring comments if my mouth is full." She waggled her eyebrows at him fiercely.

He picked her up and handed her off to a puffin maid with instructions to dump her into the moat.

Even so, Leopold wasn't at all surprised when he reached the dining room and a dripping wet Jasiri was sitting next to his sister Leona.

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Queen Jasiri and Leopold T Mouse owned by me
Art by  crazycowproductions