The Demons of Depression, Anxiety, feelings of worthlessness, of the darkness...They're always lurking. No matter how much you think you're okay, deep in the dark, they linger, they lurk and they surface at the worst possible moments.

Tonight I just had this overwhelming crushing feeling of sadness, of worthlessness, my depression has been rearing its head off and on the past little while. I've been doing what I can to fend it off but tonight it got to be too much and I had a breakdown.

I'm still on my own journey here, healing from familial abuse and being yelled at for very little to no reason for years before I moved out of the house. Even then I was still belittled and spoke down to...the past few years from 2018-2021 have been stressful.

These past few years have torn me apart emotionally due to familial issues and people taking shit out on me and just...it's been so goddamn stressful and I'm not ready by any means to be going back to work as in 2016 I fucked up my ankle and it's permanently messed up to the point where if I walk on it too much I'm unable to do much until it feels better. I've had so many breakdowns the past few years, and with all this shit in the world going on, I'm so tired...just tired emotionally and mentally and I'm trying so goddamn hard to get better.

There's still a lot of shit going on in my head, and I'm a fucking mess, I'm not going to lie. I don't vent much on FA anymore but I needed to get this out here.

I'm planning on getting back into therapy after I come back from my vacation. I need it in my life, I need a professional to talk to, to just vent to.

Athena © to me.

Comments are disabled. I don't want any long messages. I just...I had to get this out and I don't want advice or anything.

Just...I needed to vent out how I'm feeling.