Octubae
Chapter 2
“Wake up Kiitern, you are not dead.”
That voice, I know that voice. Deep, feminine but lyrical with almost a growl. Where have I heard it before?
“It is me, I am your past your present and your future.” It says
Opening my eyes I expect to see some great demon, the creature that is Fley. There is nothing but the darkness. I blink as if it might help. Everything is still void of light.
“You cannot see I know. It is because I do not want you to.”
“Who are you? What do you mean because you do not want me to?” I ask feeling the ground around me for any sign the giver of the voice.
“I have told you who I am. I would not have needed to if it had not been so long. I am the voice of your mind.”
“I do not understand what you are talking about. If this is Fley why are you toying with me? My soul is yours what more could you need from it?” Tears start to sting my eyes.
“Do not cry young wolf, I have told you that you are not dead. Why do tears sparkle in your eyes?”
“You will not give me the answers that I am in need of. If I am not dead than where am I and who are you? I know you have said you are my past present and future, my inner voice, but I do not understand,” Reaching up I wipe the tears from my eyes. “Why did you call me young wolf? I am not so young nor am I a wolf.”
“The answers will come with time. What I have told you about who I am is true, I am who you were, are and will be, I am always with you but I can tell no more about it now.” There are muted footsteps coming from the dark to my right, they stop just before they get to me. “Aye, it is true that to you at twenty one years are not young to the people of your present life but to your true life you are but a pup. You are Kiitern, Outcast, the bearer of the mark, yes?
“I am.”
“Come, walk with me, you will have the answers you seek.”
“Walk?” I ask reaching out into the dark again. “But it is so dark here, I cannot see and I am sure you cannot either. Who knows what we may walk into?”
“I can see perfectly well. You cannot, I have made it so, when you have answers you will have sight but first you must ask. Now hold out your hand.”
I hold out my right hand where it is grabbed by the nameless voice giver. Their hand is warm and very soft except for the nails, they are quite sharp, it feels as if they could dig into my skin with the slightest pressure. She, I am assuming, holds my hand and grabs my arm under my elbow to help me to my feet. I feel off balance but she steadies me, placing one hand on my back we walk in the darkness.
“Where are we going?”
“You will know when we get there, if I tell you know it would make little difference whether you had known or not.”
“Okay, if you are not Fley and I am not dead then what am I doing here?”
“Nuglek gave you a root yes? It was the root of the Magloa, used to summon visions of what has or will happen. Well this is not a vision but what will be reality, untrained in the ways of a wise woman you have strayed into what will become. What comes about here cannot be avoided.”
Our pace is steady, there is heat hitting my body only briefly it feels as if we are walking through shaded areas. The ground is flat and soft under my feet.
“Why do you refer to me as a wolf or pup?”
“This you will find out when we arrive at our destination now please ask something else.”
“What is your name?”
“I am you Kiitern; we share our name, our life and our destiny. I realize this will be hard for you to understand at this time so I will allow you to call me what you wish.”
I shake my head trying to clear my thoughts as we continue our walk. This is all so confusing, how can I be leading myself? She said I could call her whatever I wish…only one name comes to mind.
“I think I would like to call you Hookta.”
She stops for a few seconds; I hear her take in a breath and let out a sigh.
“Our mother? Why did you choose that name?”
“I don’t know, it just kept coming up in my mind.” Walking again. “I think it is because you remind me of her I think because you are leading me.”
“Very well, Hookta is what I shall be called for now. We are near our destination, when we arrive you must do as I tell you without giving it a second thought, do you understand?”
“Yes.”
The ground feels like it is getting tougher, more dirt and rocks. She stops suddenly, I almost trip but she catches me. Placing my hand against her arm to push myself back onto my own feet I can feel what seems to be fur.
“We are here, sit down and cup your hands. What I will give you will restore your sight but I will no longer be in any physical form, my voice will lead you.”
I do as she says, sitting with my legs crossed I hold my cupped hands out. She pours a cool thick liquid in.
“Drink and rub some over your eyelids. You must discard what you have left before you open your eyes, if you do not and you look into it you will stay blind even after you return.”
The taste is sweet, it is thick like honey but smooth and cool like water. I drink until there is only a little left which I rub on my eyelids. Wiping my hands in the dirt to be rid of what may remain I open my eyes. The sun is bright causing me to close them again. Holding my hand up as a shield I slowly open them again.
I am sitting on a patch of dirt and rocks near a small pool of water. The air is still and silent, not even a ripple changes the glassy appearance of the water.
“Stand Kiitern, look, explore, search. Touch the trees, feel the rocks, lay in the grass. Do not look into the water and do not stray far.”
“Why can I not look in the water?”
“It is not time yet.”
Standing I face away from the pool. The sun filters down through the tall canopy of leaves, casting shadows of green light upon the earth below. Walking to the nearest tree I feel the grass under my feet, it is soft and cool in the shade. The trees tower above my head, their trunks entwined in the grip of vines. Reaching out I feel the smooth old bark, I run my hand down a length of vines, it is almost as if I can feel the life pulsing through them. Continuing my walk I reach out to others, all answer back. There is a clearing ahead of me; pure bright sunlight has found its way down through the leaves causing unspoiled light. Making my way over to it with the intent to rest in its warmth I hear a rustle behind me.
“Hookta is that you?” I ask as I turn to face the direction.
There is no answer. Turning back to the light I continue. There is another rustling noise; there is quick movement on my left.
“Hello? Who’s there?” Facing the direction of the movement I scan the forest searching for any sign of movement but all is still. Facing forward I slowly start backing up to the sunny opening.
“Hello Kiitern.” A voice growls from behind me. It is a deep guttural sound but easily understood. I jump at the sound, turning toward the voice but no one is there. My heart is pumping so much that I am sure it is about to burst from my chest.
“Do not be afraid Kiitern.”
“Hookta, what is going on? Who was behind me?”
“Now is the time for you to look into the water, everything will be revealed once you know the truth.”
I walk quickly to the pool, glancing back every so often to make sure I am not being followed. Stepping off the grass covered area onto the patch of dirt and stone where I first began to see. The water is still, reflecting the canopy and sky in its clear surface. Slowly I make my to the edge, kneeling down I stare at my reflection, it looks back up at me.
“What am I supposed to figure out? I don’t see anything but myself.”
“If you want the answer revealed you must repeat what I say exactly as I say it.”
“Okay, I’ll try.”
“Welcanpto Lyblae Iltsen.”
“Welcanpto Lyblae Iltsen.”
Just as I finish saying these words a strong wind blows across the surface of the water causing it to ripple and slash out onto me where I am sitting. The wind strengthens, causing the ripples to grow into waves that spill out over the edge and me. The water is cold, it feels like it is gripping my skin, as if it is crawling up my body. My body is drenched. The wind dies down, the waves return to ripples then back to the smooth reflection. Looking into the pool again I see a creature staring back at me, dark fur covers its body the face is that of a wolf but the rest of it has the shape of a human except much larger. I turn my head expecting to see it looming over me but I am alone. I look back to the pool, focusing on the creatures face; the expression is soft and worried with anxious bright blue eyes. I check once more behind me, looking to the trees but see nothing that would belong to that face.
Reaching to brush a piece of hair out of my eyes I notice the wolf creature does so also. I put out my hand to touch the water. My hand! What happened to it? It is covered in fur, my nails are inch long claws…I’m the creature…I’m a…
“Yes Kiitern, you are an Octubae, one of the wolf people. This is our destiny.”
“But how can this be? I am human; I am not a monster, a beast.”
I crawl back, not wanting to look at the beast reflected in the pool. Confusion is taking over my mind, I don’t know whether I should cry or yell. What will I do? If I go back to my village they will kill me like the beast I am without a second thought. I wouldn’t fight back; I couldn’t hurt my own people. Who caused this to happen? Hookta! She brought me here, she caused this.
“Hookta,” I yell at the sky, ears laid flat against my head. “Come out, why did you do this to me? I want you to change me back!”
“I cannot. This is what you will become; nothing now can stop this from happening.”
Tears start to run down my fur covered cheek, not from sadness but from anger. My face becomes a snarl as I try my best to calm myself.
“Come now Kiitern this is not as bad as you make it out to be, yes it is true that you will not have many nights to stay with your village but you will also no longer be under the laws of an outcast.”
I try to stand up; my legs are more animal than human in appearance. My feet have turned into paws with claws sticking out, tips touching the ground. Unsteady on my new legs almost causes me to fall, I have to take a step back to keep myself upright. Holding my hands out in front of me, examining my arms, they have grown longer and more muscular. My palms are soft and dark, my finger tips are the same but the rest is fur covered.
“I am never going to see them again after I change will I?”
“One never knows, but you mustn’t dwell on the past, you must focus on what is to be.”
Walking back over to the pool I take another look at the face that will be me, standing I can see my whole body covered in dark grey fur with my wolf shaped birthmark standing out plainly in white on my chest. I have a tail, it hangs straight down, ending just below my knees; the fur is very full on it making it appear quite large. Looking into the water I realize something.
“Hookta, what happened to my clothes?”
“You will have no need of clothing; your fur will keep you warm on the coldest of nights yet cool when the sun beats down upon you.”
“Everything is so strange. How much more time do I have as a human?”
“Three days, after that Jykeji will come for you.”
“Who is Jykeji?”
“Your mate, he has been waiting for you.”
“My what? How can that be?
“I can say no more about this; it is time for you to return.”
“Why won’t you give me answers,” Shouting, teeth bared, fists clenched I stare at the sky. “You know what is going to happen, you said you were my past, present and future, you must know what is going to happen.”
“Aye, I do but I cannot reveal what is to become. Now please step into the pool.”
“I am not going to do anything until I find out more.” Walking away from the water into the trees, my tail flicks from side to side in annoyance and anger, I search to find any clue to what may happen or how to change it.
“I’m sorry but I must do this, I told you to follow my directions but you have disobeyed, I am forced to send you back now and I will not be around to help you until I deem you are ready.”
“What do you…?”
“Kiebontcha!”
Hookta’s thundering voice cuts off my sentence. There is a slight tug on my tail, turning my body to un-snag it from whatever it is caught on only to find it clear of any trees. The tugging grows more causing my tail to sticking straight out behind me. I continue walking further into the shady forest. Pressure is now beginning on my upper arms, pinning them to my side, it feels like hands, I can distinctly tell where each finger is grabbing onto me. The intensity of the tugging increases, the pressure grows to the point where I can feel my blood pumping through my veins. It is becoming increasingly harder for me to continue on my path away from the pool.
Something grabs my legs causing me to trip. Landing face down in the grass and dirt the tugging has turned into to pulling sending pain up my spine, threatening to sever my tail from my body. Straining my back, I claw at the ground and reach out to grab trees, trying to grain my footing again, doing anything possible to stay away from the water. My efforts are in vain, there are claw mark on the trees, upturned dirt and crumpled grass showing the path I have been dragged on. It continues as does my struggling; now the grass has given way to dirt and stone, any moment now I will be at the pool.
My feet go over the edge into the water; it is cold as it travels up my leg. The pool is deeper than it first seemed. Now at my waist I feel myself slipping off the edge, soon my whole body will be submerged. Only my arms, neck and head remain dry. With my last bit of effort I dig my claws into the ground.
“Hookta please don’t do this. I will listen, please,” My claws drag through the earth. Eyes burning from the tears now sliding down my face, my voice cracks. “Don’t let me go this way, I don’t want to die.”
“Let go Kiitern, it is time for you to return. You will not die, you must trust me. It would have been much better for you had you listened and followed my directions, it must be this way. Let the water take you, let it embrace you. Do not fear.”
I have no choice, taking one last deep breath I stare out at the forest. Closing my eyes I let loose my hold on the ground. Instantly I am dragged under the surface of the pool. What seemed to be calm smooth water has turned into a raging torrent. Opening my eyes I find myself surrounded by not clear water but by what looks like blood. Looking around I see shapes being thrashed about by the currant, whether they are animal or human I cannot tell. Dark and passing quickly I only notice a few features, the faces, each one more grotesque than the last to pass by me. Mangled horrible creatures. Flesh and fur hanging off bone, eyes bulging, ready to pop from their skulls, open jaws showing a rows of broken jagged teeth, withered leathery hands reach out to me as if begging me to join their everlasting swirling dance.
I close my eyes, wishing for all be normal. Opening them I am face to face with one of those monsters. A scream escapes me; the last of my air goes out as tiny bubbles that become lost in the red waters. Kicking as hard as I can, trying to make my way to the surface. My lungs feel as if they have been ripped out of my body, heart beating, pounding in my head. My surroundings become dark; the creatures are no longer visible.
Ah Reinas why was I born and outcast, if only it was not so we could have been happy together. It is better that I should die here and alone than to have you know the truth about what I will become, I hope you will have a good life, marry and have many children.
Still trying desperately to reach the surface even though I am sure that it will not matter.
Mother, father, I will be with you soon in Fley’s kingdom.
“Let the water take you, let it embrace you.”
Hookta’s words come back to me. I stop fighting the currant, my arms float at my sides and my legs are being swayed by the water. Sinking into blackness, the current pushes me down but gently. Letting it take me where it will, I feel weightless, peaceful, and ready to accept what will be. I close my eyes.

A voice. Warmth, something soft brushes against my face. The creatures? There are three voices now but I cannot understand what they are saying. A sharp pain on my hand causes me to gasp, taking in air filled with sweet smoke. I can breathe. The voices have stopped but there is shuffling near me, slowly I open my eyes. Everything is a blur; I blink, moving my hand to my face to rub my eyes. Slowly I open my eyes again, I am in Nuglek’s hut, lying on the ground, she is shuffling about me. Reinas and Icto stand by the wall, the firelight casting dancing shadows on the wall. Nuglek kneels down by my hand, it has a long cut on the palm that is bleeding. That must have been the sharp pain I felt. She takes my hand in one of hers and with the other she dips a small bundle of dried grass in my blood. She stands up and flicks the blood covered grass at me, I feel the warm droplets hit my face and body. Turning she continues, doing the same to Icto and Reinas and lastly to herself.
As she walks back towards me she throws the grass into the fire, thick dark smokes rises, and grabs a piece of the long feathery Smaglup leaf. Kneeling again she wraps the leaf around my slashed hand and ties it off. She looks me in the eyes, I am sure she knows what I saw. I look away from her to Reinas standing by the wall then turn back to her. Tears start to fall as I reach out, holding my arms around her, not wanting to let go.