You have a probable typo: I'm guessing stanza two's "worshit" is supposed to be "worship". :)


If you don't mind a bit of criticism (if you do mind—and I've run into lots of poets and even readers on FA who have vehemently protested—I then encourage you to ignore the following):






Among other things, the concept of "train" is a bit of a one-shot and doesn't receive much development as a concept (in this way, it is somewhat like a train to nowhere—how meta), so I'm not really sold on it as title. Maybe if this were one of those poems for which the point was to make no sense, but I don't get that impression from this one. Were you considering others? I know removing it would mess up the beginning and ending stanzas, which I actually like to some degree, but it feels like an orphaned idea.

Best of luck on future works.

I fixed the typo. Thank you for pointing that out.

I'm actually not sure what you meant by it being 'a bit of a one-shot'. If you could elaborate on that, I could elaborate on my thoughts.

As for the 'not making sense', I've always thought of 'trains of thought' as being roads, and some really don't lead anywhere, I guess. I'm not sure how well it came across, as it seems fairly clear to me, that the poem is really a metaphorical description of thought itself. Trains of thought, as it were.