I was not in a good place when I drew this, mentally by the way. I was having a lot of white noise in my head. And I was just drifting along with the days as they go by. I couldn’t focus, couldn’t eat properly, and couldn’t make myself break through it. I broke down crying in front of my mother as well. And I still hate myself for doing it. But what’s done is done. And the only thing I can do is to keep walking. So when I finally got my hands on a laptop, my aunt passed it down to me. I decided to just pour all of it into one drawing.
Learning how to draw with a mouse, on a laptop with a big screen, and generally, a lot of buttons gave me some trouble at first. I’ve just been drawing on my phone for the past year now. So it was a challenge for me. But I didn’t let them overwhelm me. I steadied myself and slowly kept working on it. Met some bumps in the road while drawing this. Drawing with a mouse is genuinely frustrating, haha. But I didn’t stop and just kept on working until I finished this.
And I’m happy with how this turned out. I don’t mind the fact that the first drawing I did on something else, other than my phone, was to vent. I still find myself lingering on sharp things now and then. But I can always distract myself from those.