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"Hi. I'm FBA superstar Buck Hopper. And after a hard day of tearing up the courts, nothing tastes better than biting into a Rie-lazo Fruit Bar. It's made from fresh fruits and real Mexican spices, and has the vitamins and salt I need to stay in top shape for my next game. Mmmm--urrrgh!! NNNG!! GGUUURRRNNNG!!!! ....S-s-so...t-t-t-tasty! *COUGH* B-b-buy some to-to-today!!"
It all started with a bimbo.
Oh, sorry, I mean a Bimbo.
quickxyk was laughing out of control because he saw a Mexican soccer team on TV with endorsements on their uniforms to Grupo Bimbo, the Mexican food company. Apparently having never seen Bimbo's baked goods, some friends took him to a market to buy some treats. When they came back to the hotel, they gave me a bag of "Rie-lazo hot and salted fruit bars" because it had a picture of a white bunny on it dressed up like a vaquero, complete with sunglasses and lasso.
I was delighted by the gift. The character on the packaging looked great, and the product looked so macho. It was dark and flat, and I quickly called it "fruit jerky" and thought of how awesome it would be if tough bunnies like B-Hop ate something that looked like beef jerky but was all fruits and veggies. Then I ate one.
ALL FLAVORS. AT ONCE. TO ELEVEN.
My tastebuds will never forgive me.
balto drew this while I was eating it. It's very accurate.
It all started with a bimbo.
Oh, sorry, I mean a Bimbo.
quickxyk was laughing out of control because he saw a Mexican soccer team on TV with endorsements on their uniforms to Grupo Bimbo, the Mexican food company. Apparently having never seen Bimbo's baked goods, some friends took him to a market to buy some treats. When they came back to the hotel, they gave me a bag of "Rie-lazo hot and salted fruit bars" because it had a picture of a white bunny on it dressed up like a vaquero, complete with sunglasses and lasso.I was delighted by the gift. The character on the packaging looked great, and the product looked so macho. It was dark and flat, and I quickly called it "fruit jerky" and thought of how awesome it would be if tough bunnies like B-Hop ate something that looked like beef jerky but was all fruits and veggies. Then I ate one.
ALL FLAVORS. AT ONCE. TO ELEVEN.
My tastebuds will never forgive me.
balto drew this while I was eating it. It's very accurate.
Category Artwork (Traditional) / General Furry Art
Species Rabbit / Hare
Size 1095 x 1170px
File Size 186.1 kB
marymouse
ok, I'll be banned from FBA for this, but seeing that pictureI have to ask....
"Eeeehhhhh, what's up, Hop?"
Loved the expression and the history. Congratulations.
And, think on the bright side... B-Hop could be doing those deodorant ads that include flying around on a unicorn made of soap.
"Eeeehhhhh, what's up, Hop?"
Loved the expression and the history. Congratulations.
And, think on the bright side... B-Hop could be doing those deodorant ads that include flying around on a unicorn made of soap.
LOL. Tamarind is AWESOME. Tamarind in Mexican candy is very, VERY un-awesome. "Mexican spices" usually means very hit peppers and salt. I once ate a stick of tamarind paste I bought at a Mexican tienda, because I loved tamarind pulp. It was like taking a bite of a salt lick that had been soaked in pure chili juice. With one small bite, I was sick and in agony for three days. I ended up buying another and putting it on a branch leading to our bird feeder, and squirrels refused to go near the thing.
This is awesome, and Balto did a great job picking up your expression. I have a very clear picture of the real you eating this, squinting and grimacing...
You want GOOD Mexican snacks to endorse? buy those little tan hockey puck-shaped things with the red rose on the package. They're peanut marzipan. You won't go wrong with those.
This is awesome, and Balto did a great job picking up your expression. I have a very clear picture of the real you eating this, squinting and grimacing...
You want GOOD Mexican snacks to endorse? buy those little tan hockey puck-shaped things with the red rose on the package. They're peanut marzipan. You won't go wrong with those.
Hey, I LOVE tamarind! I drink tamarind soda whenever I'm eating Mexican-- in fact, that very day that I ate that Rie-lazo bar, I had a tamarind-flavored Jarritos with dinner!
It's not the tamarind that was the problem-- and it wasn't really the spices, either, since I love spicy food and it wasn't the spiciest thing I'd ever eaten (though it was close). What really killed it was how SALTY it was-- I mean, it tasted like biting into a canister of Morton's.
It's not the tamarind that was the problem-- and it wasn't really the spices, either, since I love spicy food and it wasn't the spiciest thing I'd ever eaten (though it was close). What really killed it was how SALTY it was-- I mean, it tasted like biting into a canister of Morton's.
My punk celeb has his own Vitameatavegamin Moment!
Oooh... They just grow up so fast ...
*stages cries*
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8u5rCyQOeCs
Oooh... They just grow up so fast ...
*stages cries*
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8u5rCyQOeCs
The "tamarind sticks" were awful. Ow. It was like someone filled my insides with hot lava, chili peppers and angry hornets. For three days. Tamarind itself is great! Buy some seeds, boil 'em, and chew. The pulp is hard to get off the seeds, gotta gnaw on it. It's spicy in a good way and fruity. Tamarind are the huge, dusty brown pea pod-looking things you sometimes see in supermarkets near the really oddball vegetables like prickly pear pads.
I don't have the heart (or the stomach) to try any of the Mexican Hostess-like cakes, mainly because the American ones (Little Debbie, too) make me feel ill. They taste - to me, at least - like bleached flour as white as paper, lard, artificial cream frosting, artificial color and flavor, and fifty twenty-syllable chemical ingredients, baked or fried into a vaguely cake-like item with the consistency of uncooked cookie dough, then squired full of vaguely sweet K-mart off-brand Cool Whip. In elementary school, whenever I got hold of Twinkies, stomping on them, throwing them at walls or dropping them off high places were the order of the day. I've tasted two or three in my lifetime, and that was two or three too many. If you are what you eat, eat enough of those and you'll turn into a beaker of synthesized chemical flavorings.
I don't have the heart (or the stomach) to try any of the Mexican Hostess-like cakes, mainly because the American ones (Little Debbie, too) make me feel ill. They taste - to me, at least - like bleached flour as white as paper, lard, artificial cream frosting, artificial color and flavor, and fifty twenty-syllable chemical ingredients, baked or fried into a vaguely cake-like item with the consistency of uncooked cookie dough, then squired full of vaguely sweet K-mart off-brand Cool Whip. In elementary school, whenever I got hold of Twinkies, stomping on them, throwing them at walls or dropping them off high places were the order of the day. I've tasted two or three in my lifetime, and that was two or three too many. If you are what you eat, eat enough of those and you'll turn into a beaker of synthesized chemical flavorings.
I'm sure you can find them in your local Mexican grocery.
http://sweetlittlemexico.com/catalo.....d=yudbwggtxztt
http://sweetlittlemexico.com/catalo.....d=yudbwggtxztt
Hey, Balto - can you find ME some of those chili/salt/tamarind paste sticks? We need to keep the skwerls out of our bird feeder.
There is good Mexican candy, and there is bad Mexican candy. And then these are these hellish hot/salty tamarind sticks. Curse you, vile tamarind sticks! The "Bad Candy" review site got it wrong; it isn't tamarind in and of itself that's bad.
So what WOULD Buck endorse? And can T-Matt get a contract with Doritos?
There is good Mexican candy, and there is bad Mexican candy. And then these are these hellish hot/salty tamarind sticks. Curse you, vile tamarind sticks! The "Bad Candy" review site got it wrong; it isn't tamarind in and of itself that's bad.
So what WOULD Buck endorse? And can T-Matt get a contract with Doritos?
Oh god, the product endorsements XD
Well, you COULD have taken that multi-million dollar deal with Lucky Strike, all that involved was just wearing a headband that was red, white, green and black stripes but noooooo, you had to go for the "ethical" endorsement deal which involved tongue torture...
Well, you COULD have taken that multi-million dollar deal with Lucky Strike, all that involved was just wearing a headband that was red, white, green and black stripes but noooooo, you had to go for the "ethical" endorsement deal which involved tongue torture...
B-Hop, you gotta try DZ next. Just as in Mexico, where "candy" doesn't necessarily mean "sweet", the same is true in Holland. THE national candy of Holland is licorice, and you find sweet licorice, spiced licorice, salted licorice, etc. DZ is "Double Zout" (double salt), they're black coins with 'DZ" embossed. I actually eat these, in moderation. They taste like 5% black licorice and 95% iodized salt. Good for giving to people you don't like, too.
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