such a beutiful story

Thanks man; it means a lot!

this comment is long, but it would like to express my admiration for you and your stories.

I read your stories since "Family Bonds" and even then I thought that was pretty damn good, but for various reasons I never had the courage to expose myself to comment on (that is for you and others).

I would add that with this sequel the story has become fantastic, so much so that kept me glued to the monitor and I cried for the ending (it's really rare, it happened only on rare occasions).

I would like to explain what they mean that the 2 Fav at the first chapter of the two series (if you noticed ).
for me a Fav at only the first chapter of a series and as a Fav for all of its chapters (and to keep some order on the page of favorites).

I also sent a watch for you (only to formalize that i've been following you a little )

Sorry for the bad use of english, this isn't my first language.

Oh wow, I don't even know where to begin. Thank you so much for the kind words! I'm really glad that you enjoyed the story, and it means a lot to me to hear that you liked it! Again, thank you so much for the comment, the watch, and the fave! =D

Well that's certainly not the way I would've liked to see the story end.

*POTENTIAL SPOILER WARNING*
I feel as though this is the most emotional chapter by far, and I feel as though the latter half of it cheapens the impact of the first half. I can understand wanting to end things with a positive spin, but I just can't help but feel that the resurgence of joy and happiness is too soon and weakens the intense impact that you created at the beginning of the chapter. *steps off soapbox*
*END OF SPOILERS*

Overall, I thoroughly enjoyed the story. Once again, you've brought me through a range of emotions with this story... from joy and happiness to rage and intense sadness. The fact that you are able to so readily elicit such a range of emotions in me and the other readers is a testament to your skill, and you should be very proud of your achievement ^^

Yeah, I would agree with you that it does happen rather quickly in the end. I should probably change that, cause it's like everything is all happy and nice less than 24 hours after all that happened. I have some time at work, so maybe I'll do some rewriting of the last chapter to add some time for them to get over their grieving period, and I could also develop Darius and Seria's relationship a little more. We'll see if I can come up with something. Thank you for your honesty though =)

Nicely done on the revision! I think that the transition goes much smoother now

the revised version is certainly much better than before, I dropped all doubts I had when I finished reading the "original", but I think this story should have a sequel, but this is just my idea, the autor it's you.

This also helped me to accept the death of Drek (approximately), it is very difficult for me (don't know why) and I'm so sad (nothing to worry about).

Really thanks for the story and for the answer .

Well, I do think this was a wonderful story overall. Yes, I said would later, but I decided to sit down for another 4 hours to read the rest of your story. Well, I am happy that Seria has a mate, still when Darius asked Seria to be his mate, I was really too sad about Drek to even get that much happiness from it though I realize that was the pick me up from that harsh fall you put on us in the last chapter. Still, as much as I can see the symbolism of how you had it end, I am still kinda of depressed. I mean, I understand that Drek and Seria can never have been mates and if they could poor Darius would have been cut out of the loop and been without a mate. Still, you could have made it were Drek could have lived and got to see the glory that he was given. Then it would have been weird but it sill could have been worked out somehow where they could have lived a normal life. It's not like Darius didn't know that Drek was the father. All in all, I loved this story, but I was real disappointed in the way the ending turned out. I mean I would much rather have it end were all was really happy with Drek being alive like it was in your first story. I honestly, just did not expected that outcome and just really in shock! I just can't believe that after everything you had happen to them, you permanently separate Drek and Seria.

First off, I have to say thank you again for taking the time to read the story. I understand your frustration with the ending definitely. I let my old roommate read the story and he refused to talk to me for a few hours until he had settled down... If truth be told, when I wrote Family Bonds in 2009, my original outline was supposed to have Drek die with the Onix attack, but I couldn't bring myself to do it then. After writing so much of the story with him, it just didn't seem... fair for him to meet an end that way. Consequently, in this story, my original outline didn't call for him to die, but the more I wrote of it, the more it did seem right. He wasn't strong enough to beat Thael outright, and aside from the mundane lifestyle of waking up, eating, and being with his sister and son (and later the fight classes), the thing he cared about the most was that they were safe and happy. He had been like a big brother to his sister and protected her for his entire life basically, and with this threat eliminated, his role as protector was "fulfilled." And even though they are separated in the physical sense, they will never be separated in the spiritual sense, and his sacrifice will be remembered for generations upon generations. So, even though he did die, it was a higher honor for him and more deserving than if he simply lived his life, grew old, and then died only to be forgotten someday.

Anyway, I'm talking too much. I know the story didn't end exactly how you wanted, but from your comments, I can tell that you were very passionate about it, and that really means a lot to me. It tells me that you got involved in the story and you grew to like the characters and hate certain ones. You had a strong emotional response (even if it wasn't the one you wanted), and that means (to me) that the story was a success.

Again, thank you for all your comments and for all the time you devoted to reading! I promise that I won't write things so depressing in the future!

Dude! But... but why kill your 2 best characters?
(I´m talking about your most developed characters of the two stories)

I´m not sad... probably confused is the world

(Ps I read like all the "family bonds" "Nothing greater" chapters in like 6 days...)
(double PS: Great stories anyway... but....

Thank you for the kind words, and I'm really happy that you read all of it! It really and truly means a lot to me =)

To answer your question, I don't know if you are a Game of Thrones follower, but the author of the books, George R. R. Martin is known for killing off major characters that have been fully developed. Someone asked him in an interview why he did that, and he responded along these lines: "Whenever you read a story, there's never much tension because somewhere in the back of your head, you know that the main character will get through everything alright. If an author is not afraid to kill off characters, and that's established early on, then the reader legitimately worries about the characters they enjoy, because the reader knows that something can happen to them."

It's been over 3 years since I've written this story, so I'm a little fuzzy on all the specifics myself, but I think my response above to KeybladeMaster08 sums up my thoughts on my exact reasoning behind it. As hard as it probably was to read those parts, it was just as hard for me to write them because I fell in love with all the characters as well.

before I fully read the whole comment let me tell you something.
I´m the one that should be saying thanks, not you. There are MANY stories that aren´t that developed as yours, neither they remain that "pure" (it didnt became some kind of "Free-for-all" relating to sex)

Well, just had to say that... I suposse; back to reading!


PLPM

"Whenever you read a story, there's never much tension because somewhere in the back of your head, you know that the main character will get through everything alright. If an author is not afraid to kill off characters, and that's established early on, then the reader legitimately worries about the characters they enjoy, because the reader knows that something can happen to them."

Interesting point, but I´ll tell you another that can work along this one...
"It´s easy to create a character, easy to make it feel alive. What is truly hard is the work that comes after that, it can be very tricky! For example:
A character says something along the lines "I´m the strongest". At that point, it will only have two outcomes after that has being said:
A) he eventually fights and wins, meaning that his statement was real.
B) he is discovered to be a coward and runs away or dies (not because I hate cowards but because getting into a fight without knowing how to fight... uhm, is bad idea... hehe).

In your story of Family bonds happened somethig similar, but at the same time it didn´t happen.

Now continuing, other hard part is mantaining him true to what he was at the start (note this doesn´t necesarily apply to protagonists or secondary protagonist as the story advances.), this can be pretty tricky as the story develops; you have to change him little by little to make him feel fresh (In case you have completely developed him) and at the same time without moving to much strings because you could alienate him... tricky.

Now. Other tricky part is killing him, this is just as important as when he is spoken about the first time, it´s about killing him in a way that feels true to his character and that doesn´t feel like a kick in the balls... I´m not against killing; sometimes the story demands it, sometimes you´ve just had enough of him... etc
I´m sorry to say it in this way but: if a character has to die during a fight, because he was in that very fight...
...
Sorry, I was thinking... As the trope says: "There´s no kill like overkill", if you´re going to really kill a character consideratively fast and he is giving all what he got (and that should be strong too) there are few ways to make it feel like what it was...: that he couldn´t even win from the start.
How could someone make it feel like that? well, simply that as soon as the fight has started, it has ended, for example: If my protagonist duels with soldier N. 341 and he kills him in two seconds... He wont be a "pussy" nor a coward..., he simply didn´t stood a chance, he was too unexperienced, it´s as simple as that... it´s all or nothing.

All of that is easy to have into account... but is tricky

SON of a sljfnslfjn THATS A LONG WALL OF TEXT... well, a new record in length I suppose (Sorry)

PLPM