My old BabyBear broke so daddy bought me the 2.0. I didn’t want a new one but I guess it’s kinda neat…It can walk and talk and play. It’ll hold my ba-ba, which I totally don’t need, but BabyBear insists I use it…

It’s a tattletale too…

It tells daddy when I try to do anything fun or when I have a dirty diaper… I-I don’t need those either… Daddy says it’s my new friend but I wish it would leave me alone. It keeps trying to make me do more and more babyish things…

Not to mention it’s sparkly lights never shut off. Daddy didn’t believe me when I told him they make my head feel fuzzy. I also think I’ve gotten smaller. At least, it’s harder to reach stuff now…maybe I’m less coordinated?

Daddy doesn’t notice or he’s pretending not to. Tonight, I’ll get Daddy’s phone and use the app to deactivate BabyBear. It’ll leave me alone to charge when it thinks I’m sleeping in my crib…but I’m too clever for BabyBear. I’m going to make him go to sleep and hide him forever.