I really liked this chapter a lot.

You have a lot of temporal transitions going on in these two paragraphs. Just a place to clean up. However, very strong chapter.

After a moment, the subterranean hallway was illuminated with natural, and painfully
bright, sunlight. As the rising walls broke the surface of the ground overhead, everyone was
forced to cover their eyes from the blinding light that assaulted them. A pleasantly cool and
gentle breeze blew through the opening and into the tunnel, the flames of the torches on the
walls danced as the light wind rushed by.
As the tunnel exit finished ascending over the surface of the earth, Rana turned to
take her place in the wagon

I'm very glad you thought this one went well! Admittedly, I was a bit worried it might be leaning on the dull side like the last chapter.

I think I made some adjustments that clear up those issues you mentioned. Thank you for catching that for me. As usual, I was more focused on bits that were probably already okay.

Good chapter. The characters all feel nicely believable with a good emotional ending that didn’t come across as overly sappy or cheesy. Vidor’s tail being set ablaze is pretty amusing.

I'm glad to hear you thought that the overall tone in this one went over well enough. I had been thinking that the build up was a bit boring and that the ending was maybe a bit overblown. Also, just don't ask about the blazing tail incident... he doesn't like to talk about it...

Thanks much for checking this out. I know it's a lot and I am immensely grateful that you'd be willing to put in the time.