"We don't see each other as much as we used to. Not like Sebastian.” She smirked, and you could see the tiredness in her eyes. “Good kid.” She’s fastidious about her work, you know that. “I love ‘em both, you know.” It’s not the most pleasant line of business either… late hours, early mournings. “It ain’t out of hate. He’s busy. He’s got a life I ain’t a part of. Don’t think I could be, y’know…” There was a little bit of a wince in her voice as she said that. “Doe behavior in Spring. That’s the phrase I keep goin’ to. Doe behavior in Spring. You wouldn’t wanna see your daughter doin’ it. Don’t wanna see my boy doin’ it. I know deep down he is, and you sorta expect it to be happenin’, they ain’t how they used to be, but…

You give ‘em space. Don’t look at the stuff you don’t like because there ain’t no changin’ it, and as long as they’re keepin’ safe there ain’t no harm in it. I was a wild kid too, I know what it’s like. You let them do what they wanna do, and you support them. Ain’t that what good parents do?” She shrugged, reached down, took that beignet in her hand and brought it to her mouth before chewing on it. You got the most ridiculous realization that her face was almost a reflection of what she was eating. Powder on creamy solid. “Now Sebastian? Sebastian’s been takin’ off like a jet. Love seein’ him play, he’s got a world I can be a part of. Every game, you know what he does? Points right at me when he’s comin’ out. Both of us, we wave back, and he’s all joy and shock like he wasn’t expectin’ us to.

The other one? I dunno. I get the sense that even though he’s usually comin’ here around holidays by himself, he ain’t alone. It’s the wildest thing. All that luggage, and somehow he gets it in the house faster than Sebastian can even though that boy’s the strongest one in the family. Always shows up around midnight too. I’d say it’s strange, but he’s always had his little qualities. Even before the…”

A sad little smile stretched across her face. “You build a new life for yourself to bounce back after somethin’ like that. He’s smart. He’s doin’ alright for himself. Never asked for money. Never come in beggin’ for help. Checks in every weekend, doesn’t talk much about what he’s doin’. Sends us pictures of his apartment, which…” The doe wiped her hands off on one of her napkins. “He’s taken up sewin’, you know. I haven’t had to do that in a while, but…” She gives a soft laugh, but there’s something in it. “The therapist we got him said to find some sort of hobby and I guess he decided that since we had the books in the house he ought to learn himself, but I don’t know why he can’t put more cheerful things out into the world, he makes these creepy little dolls. I don’t want to be judgy, but…

You tilted your head a little bit. “I don’t know. Some of those shots he sends us… I don’t get how he’s taking them. I know I’m not the most tech-savvy but… it’s from the ceiling downwards. I don’t know how he does that. Is it with a stick? There’s those selfie-sticks, but…” She murmured in the negative to herself. “I don’t ever see him using one. And sometimes there’s this green glow in the corners of the screen, and I swear sometimes I can see it reflected in his eyes, and it looks like han-”

She stopped. “Think they call that trauma-dumpin’? I mean, I’m not…” You can't particularly grasp whether she's trying to force the smile or if that grimace is back. “I’ve seen a lot worse out of him. I ain’t really got trauma beyond what I experienced that day. He does somethin’ I can’t explain, I come to understand that it probably isn’t somethin’ that I should be pokin’ my head into. He’s smart, got his own life. Some of it ain’t meant for me. People feel the impossibility of reaching the center that evades them, though. … I saw that smile, that’s not an original, don’t think I just popped something out my mouth full-formed that’s all wise and understandin’ out of nowhere. I’ve been reading Woolf.

Damn I wish I had an answer for the question marks, though.”

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Hi.

Here’s Lysander Wright as he is now. More info coming soon when I’m ready for it.

Picture by  immelmann, go favorite the original over here!