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If you want me to explain this incident, here we go.
It was way back in 2017, I was at my town's museum as my dad and sister were taking part in a Viking re-enactment group that were acting there. I had bought a tin of Pokemon cards to keep me occupied and was going to sit down at one of the outdoor benches when I wound up passing a butterfly sitting on a flower on the ground. I stopped when I noticed it, but the thing flew off and went over the stream near the museum and wound up flying straight into an occupied spider web on the other side where it got killed and eaten and all I could do was watch, feeling like it was all my fault that had happened.
You might think, "couldn't I have just tried to make my way through the water to the web?" The answer is no; the drop into the stream is steep and hard to climb down into without possibly damaging your legs and is too flat to climb out of.
I feel like killing a butterfly is like a bad sign that says you're a bad person for causing it.
Every time I remember that incident, I feel nothing but guilt.
The worst part of it was that the butterfly looked like a Monarch Butterfly which is a butterfly species that is considered endangered in my country. This is something that's stuck with me for years.
I did choose to share this with my mom a couple weeks ago about this issue and how ashamed I am about what happened.
She told me that the butterfly was most likely not scared by me, considering I wasn't trying to scare it in the first place and only flew into the spider web because it was following the direction of the wind and it couldn't see the web due to how partially see through those are to bugs. She also mentioned that at least I helped the spider with helping it survive. (Like that last part did me any good)
She then told me that the butterfly might not have been a monarch butterfly at all and could've been a Painted Lady or an admiral instead, mostly because of how similar they often look and how she has trouble trying to tell the Monarch, painted lady and admiral butterflies apart herself.
Well, I guess it helped sharing it with her, but it doesn't take away the guilt and shame I feel about the incident.
Well, that's the story of my butterfly incident.
I can't see myself being forgiven by any butterfly lovers if they read this if I'm honest.
Do you think I have the right to feel guilty about this incident, or not?
It was way back in 2017, I was at my town's museum as my dad and sister were taking part in a Viking re-enactment group that were acting there. I had bought a tin of Pokemon cards to keep me occupied and was going to sit down at one of the outdoor benches when I wound up passing a butterfly sitting on a flower on the ground. I stopped when I noticed it, but the thing flew off and went over the stream near the museum and wound up flying straight into an occupied spider web on the other side where it got killed and eaten and all I could do was watch, feeling like it was all my fault that had happened.
You might think, "couldn't I have just tried to make my way through the water to the web?" The answer is no; the drop into the stream is steep and hard to climb down into without possibly damaging your legs and is too flat to climb out of.
I feel like killing a butterfly is like a bad sign that says you're a bad person for causing it.
Every time I remember that incident, I feel nothing but guilt.
The worst part of it was that the butterfly looked like a Monarch Butterfly which is a butterfly species that is considered endangered in my country. This is something that's stuck with me for years.
I did choose to share this with my mom a couple weeks ago about this issue and how ashamed I am about what happened.
She told me that the butterfly was most likely not scared by me, considering I wasn't trying to scare it in the first place and only flew into the spider web because it was following the direction of the wind and it couldn't see the web due to how partially see through those are to bugs. She also mentioned that at least I helped the spider with helping it survive. (Like that last part did me any good)
She then told me that the butterfly might not have been a monarch butterfly at all and could've been a Painted Lady or an admiral instead, mostly because of how similar they often look and how she has trouble trying to tell the Monarch, painted lady and admiral butterflies apart herself.
Well, I guess it helped sharing it with her, but it doesn't take away the guilt and shame I feel about the incident.
Well, that's the story of my butterfly incident.
I can't see myself being forgiven by any butterfly lovers if they read this if I'm honest.
Do you think I have the right to feel guilty about this incident, or not?
Category Artwork (Digital) / All
Species Unspecified / Any
Size 1724 x 988px
File Size 82.5 kB
Listed in Folders
You have a right too. It shows your human and cared for another being for but a moment. A purity of self and awareness of the world. Our actions have consequences. However, there too is a nature of things. There is two sides of a single coin. The monarch flew with its buggy brains into the spider web who weaved his web just for the occasion. The spider was fed. You did not stick it there with intent, nor did you kill the butterfly yourself with intent. Just an event and beating of wings. You can't blame yourself for that. Things happen. Truth is revealed.
The moment your human enough to realize many things in the world and in that realization you can let it go. You remembered and took note of the butterfly in that fleeing second, that is a powerful thing.
Thank you for sharing this human story.
The moment your human enough to realize many things in the world and in that realization you can let it go. You remembered and took note of the butterfly in that fleeing second, that is a powerful thing.
Thank you for sharing this human story.
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