The van that had yoinked Felicity off a university sidewalk belonged to Kidnappers-R-Us. The van didn't say that - it'd be a very bad idea for the business to advertise so flagrantly - but Felicity had gathered as much from the jumpsuits the kidnappers wore which did proudly declare business name and logo.

As soon as the van peeled out with Felicity captive aboard, there had been a fierce debate on whether to bother blindfolding her. The argument that "It's company policy, JERRY," had won and a blindfold had been tied over the hair that already covered her eyes.

For all the good that did.

Felicity had waited for a lull in the argument and asked where they were taking her and they told her to hush. And since the sphinx didn't think she sensed immediate danger, she did hush. She sat quietly and was a model kidnappee.

The van screeched to a stop and Felicity was dragged out of the van and tied to a chair.

"You were a model kidnappee," one of the kidnappers said. "I hope the sick fuck that hired us doesn't treat you too badly."

"Fucks sake, Jerry!" one of the other kidnappers responded. "Don't shit-talk the customer! That's like policy number one!"

Still arguing, the kidnappers filed out. Not long after, Felicity heard the van screech away.

The sphinx oracle waited a couple minutes. But when no "sick fuck" was forthcoming, Felicity just untied herself and pulled off the blindfold. Jerry was not good at knots.

Felicity was in an abandoned warehouse. Abandoned Warehouse #83, judging by the giant 83 painted on the wall.

Abandoned except for a raccoon looking very pleased with herself.

"Rachael?"

"Guess I can finally cross 'kidnap Oracle' off my to-do list!" said Rachael Reynard, famous thief and former uninvited guest of Felicity.

"Look at you!!!" Felicity exclaimed in excitement. The slightly rounded belly she'd seen on the mountain had swelled out into a full-term gravid belly. The irreverent raccoon thief who had only reluctantly revealed to Felicity her insecurities would soon be a mom.

Still grinning like crazy, Rachael pulled out a carton of Exotic Milk with Felicity on it. The raccoon started laughing so hard that tears welled up in her eyes. She pointed from the carton to the sphinx. "No. Look at you!!! I tried to kidnap you off the mountain but you said you couldn't leave. And next time I see your face, its a mascot for crappy milk!"

Felicity couldn't help but smile too, at the absurdity of this reunion. That her brief foray into being a commercial model had caused her and Rachael's paths to cross again.

"I have been told that milk isn't suitable for ingestion," Felicity said, seriously. "I hope you didn't plan on drinking it or giving it to your child."

"Relax!" Rachael commanded. "I heard about the milk funk and wanted to see if I could use it to make a better stink bomb. Y'know, for whenever I get back to work. But I get the carton and who do I see but my Oracle! So I pulled some strings, spent some favors, and hired Kidnappers-R-Us to kidnap you."

"You could have sent a note. I would have come to see you. I didn't think I ever would again."

"Pssh. Not my style." Rachael sat down gingerly in a second chair. "But what about you? How does an Oracle wind up putting on a bikini to sell milk?"

So, Felicity told Rachael everything. How Felicity had gotten lonely after Rachael left and decided to see the outside world when a six-month opportunity opened up. How she had been found and taken in by a kind young woman at Grimaldi University. And the experiences Sadie and her friends had arranged for Felicity. Leading Felicity to want to pay Sadie back for her kindness and how that had led to Felicity's face being printed on milk cartons. It had been a very eventful nearly six months.

After telling the story though, Felicity noticed Rachael looked pained.

"Have I upset you?" Felicity asked.

"Ugh, no. I've just been having these cramps off and on for a bit." The raccoon rested her hand on her pregnant stomach and groaned.

Felicity looked again at Rachael's full-term belly.

"They might be contractions," suggest the sphinx

"This IS near my due date," Rachael said. "I was going to check into a hospital but then I got the call from Kidnappers-R-Us that they'd spotted you and well... I got sidetracked!"

"You should go to the hospital."

"Okay but you're not getting away that easily. I paid a pretty penny to kidnap you."

Felicity offered her hand to help Rachael out of her chair.

"Of course, my first and weirdest friend. I'm here for you."

Rachael reached up and took the hand.

--

She was still holding it later at the hospital. Despite requesting and getting a big epidural to dull the pain of childbirth, Rachael tightly held Felicity's hand.

"Took me forever to get you off that mountain," Rachael said, smiling weakly. "Not letting you slip away on me now."

"Of course not," Felicity agreed.

"How are you doing, Mrs Tobey?" asked a nurse. Rachael chuckled. She'd given her name as Mami Tobey when she checked in.

"I'm glad I'm not handling this alone in a safe house," Rachael said. That had been a potential plan for way longer than it should have been, until she'd read more of her stolen maternity books.

"Yes, we get that a lot," said the nurse. Because this was a crime hospital. A hospital for crime.

The nurse turned to Felicity. She had the strangest feeling she recognized her face... maybe from a dairy product of some sort.

"And are you the... wife?"

"No," answered Felicity. "She came to my home and attempted to kidnap me nearly six months ago. I proved too big so she just moved in with me. We wound up emotionally bonding and she's important to me in a way that's hard to succinctly summarize. We lost track of each other for a while but then she sent people to kidnap me today and we reconnected."

The nurse stared dispassionately at the two women. She'd heard it all before.

"That's all not going to fit on the form. I'm just going to put you down as the wife."

---

Rachael sure has been pregnant for a while. Taking care of that.

Felicity and Rachael sure have been in the same city for a while without running into each other. Taking care of that!

I've been sitting on this picture for about a year because I kept coming up with good ideas for Felicity's stay with Sadie and Friends.

That time doesn't have to be over but now Rachael has re-entered the picture.

Felicity borrowed a cellphone while she was at the hospital and sent Sadie a message. But she's got those big meaty digits sometimes and typos a lot. Autocorrect further mangled it so the resulting message was a bit hard to parse. Sadie knows Felicity is okay and is in the middle of something but doesn't understand what a Mommy Toby is.

"Do you know a Toby?" she asked Alyson.

"I think Toby is the guy that runs the bagel shoppe in the Commons?"

So they went to see Toby, interrogated him, Sadie made him cry a little, and then they all enjoyed a nice bagel.

---

Felicity the Oracle and Rachael Reynard owned by me
Art by  kastoluza