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Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
Though wise men at their end know dark is right,
Because their words had forked no lightning they
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Good men, the last wave by, crying how bright
Their frail deeds might have danced in a green bay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
Wild men who caught and sang the sun in flight,
And learn, too late, they grieved it on its way,
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Grave men, near death, who see with blinding sight
Blind eyes could blaze like meteors and be gay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
And you, my father, there on the sad height,
Curse, bless, me now with your fierce tears, I pray.
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
-Dylan Thomas, 1952
Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
Though wise men at their end know dark is right,
Because their words had forked no lightning they
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Good men, the last wave by, crying how bright
Their frail deeds might have danced in a green bay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
Wild men who caught and sang the sun in flight,
And learn, too late, they grieved it on its way,
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Grave men, near death, who see with blinding sight
Blind eyes could blaze like meteors and be gay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
And you, my father, there on the sad height,
Curse, bless, me now with your fierce tears, I pray.
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
-Dylan Thomas, 1952
Category Story / Miscellaneous
Species Housecat
Size 120 x 120px
File Size 12.1 kB
Also: Great poem. Isn't it great to find a piece of art that expresses exactly what you're struggling through? The older the better. And if it's something you stumbled upon in school... well nothing's more gratifying than that.
But that's the great truth: It's all been done before. We all rage like this, we all get self destructive, resign ourselves to live hard and take what's ours- to simply exist powerfully enough that one may break into immortality. Hell, there's even a Family Guy episode about it. But since it's happened so many times before we already know the ending: You will either get tired, worn down, and resign to dignity, possibly finding a more plausible way to live forever (like the many authors you have cited do and will), or you will self destruct. You can argue all you want about our purpose in the universe and what we are here to do, but we are clearly designed to do something- and taking, abusing, and denial is not what we do. It destroys us. When you know something is wrong it will burn inside of you until you accept that. You clearly know that too well. And that is why you are not an adult yet, if only by the rule stipulated above: You are still in denial of death.
Acceptance will come. It will come on your own terms. If nothing you've found works that only means you will keep looking. Acceptance comes not from finding a divine answer, but knowing that there is one, FEELING there is one, and continually striving and learning until it becomes clear. It may be God, it may not... but I do know that everything we know about God, if he were to exist, is wrong. If it weren't we would no longer need to keep looking, keep burning.
Death is anticlimactic because we can not know the answer while we are alive. What is inside the box can no know what is outside of it. It will always be that way. So live hard, yes, and burn bright. But do so with all the universe has given you: Your wit, your reason, your joy, and your sorrow. Your sheer will. Who you are. Make no excuses, do not what you know to be wrong, even if you can convince others it is right. We'll never know the answer, but we'll keep getting closer... and that's somewhat thrilling. And the fact that it is tells me we were built to look.
A final thought: The universe doesn't waste. It spirals slowly to depletion, but it conserves wherever possible. Science proves this again and again. It is this simple fact alone that assures me there is something more beyond death- because what we have learned, with our unique awareness and pursuits, can not be wasted so vainly. It violates all we know about the laws and order of this universe of ours.
But that's the great truth: It's all been done before. We all rage like this, we all get self destructive, resign ourselves to live hard and take what's ours- to simply exist powerfully enough that one may break into immortality. Hell, there's even a Family Guy episode about it. But since it's happened so many times before we already know the ending: You will either get tired, worn down, and resign to dignity, possibly finding a more plausible way to live forever (like the many authors you have cited do and will), or you will self destruct. You can argue all you want about our purpose in the universe and what we are here to do, but we are clearly designed to do something- and taking, abusing, and denial is not what we do. It destroys us. When you know something is wrong it will burn inside of you until you accept that. You clearly know that too well. And that is why you are not an adult yet, if only by the rule stipulated above: You are still in denial of death.
Acceptance will come. It will come on your own terms. If nothing you've found works that only means you will keep looking. Acceptance comes not from finding a divine answer, but knowing that there is one, FEELING there is one, and continually striving and learning until it becomes clear. It may be God, it may not... but I do know that everything we know about God, if he were to exist, is wrong. If it weren't we would no longer need to keep looking, keep burning.
Death is anticlimactic because we can not know the answer while we are alive. What is inside the box can no know what is outside of it. It will always be that way. So live hard, yes, and burn bright. But do so with all the universe has given you: Your wit, your reason, your joy, and your sorrow. Your sheer will. Who you are. Make no excuses, do not what you know to be wrong, even if you can convince others it is right. We'll never know the answer, but we'll keep getting closer... and that's somewhat thrilling. And the fact that it is tells me we were built to look.
A final thought: The universe doesn't waste. It spirals slowly to depletion, but it conserves wherever possible. Science proves this again and again. It is this simple fact alone that assures me there is something more beyond death- because what we have learned, with our unique awareness and pursuits, can not be wasted so vainly. It violates all we know about the laws and order of this universe of ours.
>And now you understand the end of 'No Country for Old Men.'
Actually I don't, but it's been a while since I saw it.
>Isn't it great to find a piece of art that expresses exactly what you're struggling through?
It really surprised me. I'd thought the phrase was 'go gently into that good night' and was looking it up so I could attack that idea!
>but we are clearly designed to do something-
If we are "clearly designed" to do anything, it's to reproduce and then die.
>And that is why you are not an adult yet, if only by the rule stipulated above: You are still in denial of death.
Well fuck you very much. I don't deny that death is inevitable, but I'm not going to lie about how I feel about it in the meantime. I'm not going to sugarcoat it or wax poetic about it. It's horrifying. It's an insult to every living thing with a consciousness. Why shouldn't I be able to live as long as I choose? Why should I be accepting of some thing that will one day steal from me everything I value? There's no reason you could give me that's good enough. Natural order? Fuck that. Nature is uncaring and unjust; we have invented science to cheat around nature's rules, and we are at our best when we do so. I don't want to live forever, but I want to be able to decide for myself when I'm ready to end after I feel I've done all I want to do. Until then, I will not shut up about it. If the choice is between acceptance and self-destruction, I see self-destruction as the far more preferable option. I'd rather die fighting than accept the rule of a corrupt government. That includes the rules that govern the natural world.
>Acceptance comes not from finding a divine answer, but knowing that there is one, FEELING there is one, and continually striving and learning until it becomes clear.
As stated above, I think that's BS. Or at least, there's not enough evidence to support it when all the evidence we have points to life being a meaningless game of endless, pointless genetic reproduction. I'm open to the possibility that there's a meaning. I'd like for there to be a meaning. But personally, I cannot allow myself to believe that what I want to be true is more real than what the evidence shows.
I might want there to be a million dollars in my bank account. I might want it so hard I actually believe it's true. But if I act on that belief, it will not benefit me any. It will almost certainly have the opposite effect.
What the evidence shows is that there's nothing out there that doesn't come from our own imaginations. No God, no great spirit, no grand plan. We have only each other to look to for justice, compassion and progress. So if I want to live as long as I choose, I have only medical science, and my own will, that I know I can rely on. And I only have about 50% faith in medical science. And I know that I have nothing to lose by simply trying to will myself to exist beyond death. It feels a lot more plausible than just hoping there's something already in place to catch me.
>We'll never know the answer, but we'll keep getting closer... and that's somewhat thrilling. And the fact that it is tells me we were built to look.
It's not enough for me though. It's not fucking enough. When someone knows something but won't tell me, my reaction is to feel patronized. I don't care how wise the person is, I don't care if it's the mind of the cosmos itself. To me, being cryptic means you're an arrogant dick. I'd rather forge my own path, make my own mistakes, than have to mess around with a bunch of riddles. What happens if I am told the answer beforehand? Worst case scenario; I ignore it and learn it by experience later anyway. I know most people aren't like this. But this is how I am. I spent my whole childhood dealing with a mother who was as duplicitous as a human being could be. I've had enough of that for a lifetime. If the universe can't man up and speak clearly to me, I don't feel like I have to bother listening. My message to it is, "You haven't made the rules clear. So you have no right to be angry at me if I don't follow them."
>A final thought: The universe doesn't waste.
I don't know where the heck you're getting that, because I've never seen any evidence that that's the case. The universe recycles raw materials, yes, but it wastes minds like sheets of used toilet paper.
Actually I don't, but it's been a while since I saw it.
>Isn't it great to find a piece of art that expresses exactly what you're struggling through?
It really surprised me. I'd thought the phrase was 'go gently into that good night' and was looking it up so I could attack that idea!
>but we are clearly designed to do something-
If we are "clearly designed" to do anything, it's to reproduce and then die.
>And that is why you are not an adult yet, if only by the rule stipulated above: You are still in denial of death.
Well fuck you very much. I don't deny that death is inevitable, but I'm not going to lie about how I feel about it in the meantime. I'm not going to sugarcoat it or wax poetic about it. It's horrifying. It's an insult to every living thing with a consciousness. Why shouldn't I be able to live as long as I choose? Why should I be accepting of some thing that will one day steal from me everything I value? There's no reason you could give me that's good enough. Natural order? Fuck that. Nature is uncaring and unjust; we have invented science to cheat around nature's rules, and we are at our best when we do so. I don't want to live forever, but I want to be able to decide for myself when I'm ready to end after I feel I've done all I want to do. Until then, I will not shut up about it. If the choice is between acceptance and self-destruction, I see self-destruction as the far more preferable option. I'd rather die fighting than accept the rule of a corrupt government. That includes the rules that govern the natural world.
>Acceptance comes not from finding a divine answer, but knowing that there is one, FEELING there is one, and continually striving and learning until it becomes clear.
As stated above, I think that's BS. Or at least, there's not enough evidence to support it when all the evidence we have points to life being a meaningless game of endless, pointless genetic reproduction. I'm open to the possibility that there's a meaning. I'd like for there to be a meaning. But personally, I cannot allow myself to believe that what I want to be true is more real than what the evidence shows.
I might want there to be a million dollars in my bank account. I might want it so hard I actually believe it's true. But if I act on that belief, it will not benefit me any. It will almost certainly have the opposite effect.
What the evidence shows is that there's nothing out there that doesn't come from our own imaginations. No God, no great spirit, no grand plan. We have only each other to look to for justice, compassion and progress. So if I want to live as long as I choose, I have only medical science, and my own will, that I know I can rely on. And I only have about 50% faith in medical science. And I know that I have nothing to lose by simply trying to will myself to exist beyond death. It feels a lot more plausible than just hoping there's something already in place to catch me.
>We'll never know the answer, but we'll keep getting closer... and that's somewhat thrilling. And the fact that it is tells me we were built to look.
It's not enough for me though. It's not fucking enough. When someone knows something but won't tell me, my reaction is to feel patronized. I don't care how wise the person is, I don't care if it's the mind of the cosmos itself. To me, being cryptic means you're an arrogant dick. I'd rather forge my own path, make my own mistakes, than have to mess around with a bunch of riddles. What happens if I am told the answer beforehand? Worst case scenario; I ignore it and learn it by experience later anyway. I know most people aren't like this. But this is how I am. I spent my whole childhood dealing with a mother who was as duplicitous as a human being could be. I've had enough of that for a lifetime. If the universe can't man up and speak clearly to me, I don't feel like I have to bother listening. My message to it is, "You haven't made the rules clear. So you have no right to be angry at me if I don't follow them."
>A final thought: The universe doesn't waste.
I don't know where the heck you're getting that, because I've never seen any evidence that that's the case. The universe recycles raw materials, yes, but it wastes minds like sheets of used toilet paper.
Again, there is no one answer. Not that I've stumbled across anyway. So your differing in opinion is completely fine. And I didn't mean to insult you when I said you're not mature, I'm merely pointing out that by the rules set up in that famous quote you technically aren't yet. But who made that guy the king of adulthood?
"I don't want to live forever, but I want to be able to decide for myself when I'm ready to end after I feel I've done all I want to do. Until then, I will not shut up about it."
I think this comes down to the real point in that quote. Maturity, as it is described there (and in my own opinion) comes from an acceptance that it can end without you having done all that you want to do. And, more to the point, when you do everything you can to your own personal levels of satisfaction that you have, then, done all you wanted to do in a given period of time (your life up to said point). It's not a pleasant answer, but as you said before, when is death ever a pleasant answer? After torture, possibly, but that's bittersweet and beside the point.
I actually heard it put well on a YouTube comment recently, funny enough: There are no good endings, because the end, by definition, is a conclusion. There is no more after it. Even if you've lived the best life you possibly could, done everything you really wanted to do (aside from gain immortality, of course), death is still the end. And that will always be hard to accept. I don't think anybody will ever tell you otherwise, not with a straight face at least.
I know I'm likely not helping. I can't possibly address all the issues you've brought up properly without writing an essay or two myself. I simply want to share whatever incites I've gathered along my way in life, through similar emotions like you've expressed above, and hope you can use them to find acceptance with the inevitable (acceptance, by the way, does not have to equal peace). But you really must come to some sort of an agreement. Even if you view death as an adversary, which I am not saying is a wrong way to view it at all, you must view it as a worthy one. Striking back blindly and chaotically won't help. In fact it only plays against your mortality. Planning your strikes and focusing on what you really wish to accomplish will benefit you in the long run. And always plan for the possibility that your entire outlook may change once again, as it has now.
I do want to say that I still disagree with your point on waste, and I can understand why you disagree with mine. My point of view is not based on a hope that life/soul/consciousness continues after passing (though I must admit that hope is what started my search), but my own admittedly unprofessional conclusions after researching and studying. While I have nothing more to offer than an unproven thesis, it is nevertheless one that is not reliant on hope but instead study and logical conclusion, and until it is proven wrong I will continue to believe it to be the strong possibility I think it is and continue on with my research.
"I don't want to live forever, but I want to be able to decide for myself when I'm ready to end after I feel I've done all I want to do. Until then, I will not shut up about it."
I think this comes down to the real point in that quote. Maturity, as it is described there (and in my own opinion) comes from an acceptance that it can end without you having done all that you want to do. And, more to the point, when you do everything you can to your own personal levels of satisfaction that you have, then, done all you wanted to do in a given period of time (your life up to said point). It's not a pleasant answer, but as you said before, when is death ever a pleasant answer? After torture, possibly, but that's bittersweet and beside the point.
I actually heard it put well on a YouTube comment recently, funny enough: There are no good endings, because the end, by definition, is a conclusion. There is no more after it. Even if you've lived the best life you possibly could, done everything you really wanted to do (aside from gain immortality, of course), death is still the end. And that will always be hard to accept. I don't think anybody will ever tell you otherwise, not with a straight face at least.
I know I'm likely not helping. I can't possibly address all the issues you've brought up properly without writing an essay or two myself. I simply want to share whatever incites I've gathered along my way in life, through similar emotions like you've expressed above, and hope you can use them to find acceptance with the inevitable (acceptance, by the way, does not have to equal peace). But you really must come to some sort of an agreement. Even if you view death as an adversary, which I am not saying is a wrong way to view it at all, you must view it as a worthy one. Striking back blindly and chaotically won't help. In fact it only plays against your mortality. Planning your strikes and focusing on what you really wish to accomplish will benefit you in the long run. And always plan for the possibility that your entire outlook may change once again, as it has now.
I do want to say that I still disagree with your point on waste, and I can understand why you disagree with mine. My point of view is not based on a hope that life/soul/consciousness continues after passing (though I must admit that hope is what started my search), but my own admittedly unprofessional conclusions after researching and studying. While I have nothing more to offer than an unproven thesis, it is nevertheless one that is not reliant on hope but instead study and logical conclusion, and until it is proven wrong I will continue to believe it to be the strong possibility I think it is and continue on with my research.
>Again, there is no one answer. Not that I've stumbled across anyway. So your differing in opinion is completely fine. And I didn't mean to insult you when I said you're not mature, I'm merely pointing out that by the rules set up in that famous quote you technically aren't yet. But who made that guy the king of adulthood?
Fair enough. No hard feelings. Personally, i kinda see 'growing up' as a disease. You can be mature without being an adult. It just seems like 'adulthood' means killing off some of the freedom of emotion and imagination of childhood.
>I actually heard it put well on a YouTube comment recently, funny enough: There are no good endings, because the end, by definition, is a conclusion. There is no more after it. Even if you've lived the best life you possibly could, done everything you really wanted to do (aside from gain immortality, of course), death is still the end.
I believe that we shouldn't ever accept any limitations. I've lived my life so far on a philosophy of, 'It I want it, it is already mine'. And that's worked out pretty well for me so far. I've bought things I never thought I'd be able to buy, gone places I never thought I could go. In fact, there's been a pattern in my life of me being told why I can't do something, then me ignoring what was said, trying it anyway, and realizing I could accomplish it with far less effort than I thought.
So when I'm told death is the permanent end, I look at all the other times when people told me something was impossible, and I have a decent amount of confidence that I can exist beyond death because I will it to be.
>I know I'm likely not helping. I can't possibly address all the issues you've brought up properly without writing an essay or two myself.
Hey, write it and post it on your page! ;)
>But you really must come to some sort of an agreement.
Why?
>Even if you view death as an adversary, which I am not saying is a wrong way to view it at all, you must view it as a worthy one.
Why? There have been plenty of times in my life when it seems like some 'force' (the universe, fate, god, whatever) has been blocking my path, trying to keep me from something I want. In the end, I have ALWAYS gotten what I wanted. So far, the universe has shown itself to be unable to do anything more than put speedbumps in my path. Why should I view death differently?
>And always plan for the possibility that your entire outlook may change once again, as it has now.
I know. By now, I pretty much exist to adapt.
>While I have nothing more to offer than an unproven thesis, it is nevertheless one that is not reliant on hope but instead study and logical conclusion, and until it is proven wrong I will continue to believe it to be the strong possibility I think it is and continue on with my research.
There's a difference, for me, between hoping in something, believing in something, and acting on something. Like I said about the million dollars. I hope, just like you do, that there's more to life. I come very close to believing it. But since I can't know with certainty what's true, I cannot act on those hopes or beliefs. I can simultaneously hope for one outcome while ranting against a different one.
Fair enough. No hard feelings. Personally, i kinda see 'growing up' as a disease. You can be mature without being an adult. It just seems like 'adulthood' means killing off some of the freedom of emotion and imagination of childhood.
>I actually heard it put well on a YouTube comment recently, funny enough: There are no good endings, because the end, by definition, is a conclusion. There is no more after it. Even if you've lived the best life you possibly could, done everything you really wanted to do (aside from gain immortality, of course), death is still the end.
I believe that we shouldn't ever accept any limitations. I've lived my life so far on a philosophy of, 'It I want it, it is already mine'. And that's worked out pretty well for me so far. I've bought things I never thought I'd be able to buy, gone places I never thought I could go. In fact, there's been a pattern in my life of me being told why I can't do something, then me ignoring what was said, trying it anyway, and realizing I could accomplish it with far less effort than I thought.
So when I'm told death is the permanent end, I look at all the other times when people told me something was impossible, and I have a decent amount of confidence that I can exist beyond death because I will it to be.
>I know I'm likely not helping. I can't possibly address all the issues you've brought up properly without writing an essay or two myself.
Hey, write it and post it on your page! ;)
>But you really must come to some sort of an agreement.
Why?
>Even if you view death as an adversary, which I am not saying is a wrong way to view it at all, you must view it as a worthy one.
Why? There have been plenty of times in my life when it seems like some 'force' (the universe, fate, god, whatever) has been blocking my path, trying to keep me from something I want. In the end, I have ALWAYS gotten what I wanted. So far, the universe has shown itself to be unable to do anything more than put speedbumps in my path. Why should I view death differently?
>And always plan for the possibility that your entire outlook may change once again, as it has now.
I know. By now, I pretty much exist to adapt.
>While I have nothing more to offer than an unproven thesis, it is nevertheless one that is not reliant on hope but instead study and logical conclusion, and until it is proven wrong I will continue to believe it to be the strong possibility I think it is and continue on with my research.
There's a difference, for me, between hoping in something, believing in something, and acting on something. Like I said about the million dollars. I hope, just like you do, that there's more to life. I come very close to believing it. But since I can't know with certainty what's true, I cannot act on those hopes or beliefs. I can simultaneously hope for one outcome while ranting against a different one.
Respecting death and coming to an agreement with it doesn't mean you have to give in. It just means you should keep your wits about you. Human beings are a constant balancing act between two governing forces: Emotion and Intellect. When something disrupts (or threatens to do so) our world like yours has been here it is easy to react purely, or mostly guided by, emotion. But that is not the optimal way to do things. Although the direction that emotion takes you in is powerful, profound, primal, and worthy of analysis.
Essentially: I admire the way you live. I am not asking you to conform to a particular way of life or to necessarily stop doing what you're doing (in fact I love what you're doing, at least what I can see from the FA side of things). I just wish to make sure you don't make any rash decisions. I don't know which way is the right way to live any more than you do, but I am 99% certain that driving a car into a Starbucks isn't the way to go about it... Even if you do feel more inclined to do that now that I've suggested you shouldn't. Have a civil battle: Come to a gentlemen's agreement on terms and conditions, and by doing so control your emotions to better focus your tactics, but don't lose your fire.
Also... don't do anything you may one day regret, just in case that paradigm shift rolls around again.
And don't mistake my way of life as a passive one. Even if I am fairly sure there is more beyond life after death, that makes me no less objective or motivated than you may be. I still have many answers I need to find, wrongs I need to right, and a new trail to blaze bright so that others may follow.
That's the difference, really. Hope is passive. Idealism is not. It must be nurtured, defended, and dissected... If life is your battleground, it is my experiment.
Essentially: I admire the way you live. I am not asking you to conform to a particular way of life or to necessarily stop doing what you're doing (in fact I love what you're doing, at least what I can see from the FA side of things). I just wish to make sure you don't make any rash decisions. I don't know which way is the right way to live any more than you do, but I am 99% certain that driving a car into a Starbucks isn't the way to go about it... Even if you do feel more inclined to do that now that I've suggested you shouldn't. Have a civil battle: Come to a gentlemen's agreement on terms and conditions, and by doing so control your emotions to better focus your tactics, but don't lose your fire.
Also... don't do anything you may one day regret, just in case that paradigm shift rolls around again.
And don't mistake my way of life as a passive one. Even if I am fairly sure there is more beyond life after death, that makes me no less objective or motivated than you may be. I still have many answers I need to find, wrongs I need to right, and a new trail to blaze bright so that others may follow.
That's the difference, really. Hope is passive. Idealism is not. It must be nurtured, defended, and dissected... If life is your battleground, it is my experiment.
>Human beings are a constant balancing act between two governing forces: Emotion and Intellect. When something disrupts (or threatens to do so) our world like yours has been here it is easy to react purely, or mostly guided by, emotion. But that is not the optimal way to do things. Although the direction that emotion takes you in is powerful, profound, primal, and worthy of analysis.
Interestingly, I seem to be at my calmest and most in-control in a crisis. Likely because my mother put me through so many as a child. When things are fucking up horribly, I'm in my element. I go into analysis mode. This can be useful, but it also means I don't feel a lot of certain deep emotions anymore. :/
>but I am 99% certain that driving a car into a Starbucks isn't the way to go about it...
Sounds Tyler Durdenish.
>Even if you do feel more inclined to do that now that I've suggested you shouldn't. Have a civil battle: Come to a gentlemen's agreement on terms and conditions, and by doing so control your emotions to better focus your tactics, but don't lose your fire.
Sounds about right. I try to live hedonistically within reason. I buy frivolous stuff, but keep a careful eye on my money. I ear tasty food, but try not to overeat on the junky stuff. I'm even trying to get out of the house and go walking more, just because it's fun. And I'm always willing to have a civil battle. I try my best to let any of my opponents decide the tone of our quarrel. So I'm willing to either kick death's ass or shake his hand, depending on how he treats me. ;)
>That's the difference, really. Hope is passive. Idealism is not. It must be nurtured, defended, and dissected... If life is your battleground, it is my experiment.
I understand. For me, I've been through so much bullshit and duplicity, I have no more patience left for ambiguity. But I understand why some people enjoy and embrace not knowing. I feel somewhat like a puppy who's been kicked so many times I instinctually take a defensive stance when I see someone coming near me.
Interestingly, I seem to be at my calmest and most in-control in a crisis. Likely because my mother put me through so many as a child. When things are fucking up horribly, I'm in my element. I go into analysis mode. This can be useful, but it also means I don't feel a lot of certain deep emotions anymore. :/
>but I am 99% certain that driving a car into a Starbucks isn't the way to go about it...
Sounds Tyler Durdenish.
>Even if you do feel more inclined to do that now that I've suggested you shouldn't. Have a civil battle: Come to a gentlemen's agreement on terms and conditions, and by doing so control your emotions to better focus your tactics, but don't lose your fire.
Sounds about right. I try to live hedonistically within reason. I buy frivolous stuff, but keep a careful eye on my money. I ear tasty food, but try not to overeat on the junky stuff. I'm even trying to get out of the house and go walking more, just because it's fun. And I'm always willing to have a civil battle. I try my best to let any of my opponents decide the tone of our quarrel. So I'm willing to either kick death's ass or shake his hand, depending on how he treats me. ;)
>That's the difference, really. Hope is passive. Idealism is not. It must be nurtured, defended, and dissected... If life is your battleground, it is my experiment.
I understand. For me, I've been through so much bullshit and duplicity, I have no more patience left for ambiguity. But I understand why some people enjoy and embrace not knowing. I feel somewhat like a puppy who's been kicked so many times I instinctually take a defensive stance when I see someone coming near me.
I don't embrace not-knowing... I just accept it as a likelihood. But I try like hell to know as much as I can. I've just... learned to be content during the search. ;)
But it does seem like you're in better control than I was afraid you were. That's good. You may have your problems (although I would argue if you can so effectively identify your faults and function you're far, far better off than most), but we all do. The key is finding the benefit from their results, and it seems like you've done a fairly good job at that. You seem a lot happier than many other people I've talked to, all of which were fine with ideal upbringing. Again, I continue to admire you. I think I'll take some of this as advice, actually, and put a bit more thought into indulgence on my own end. Couldn't hurt...
Well it could, but it'll be fun.
But it does seem like you're in better control than I was afraid you were. That's good. You may have your problems (although I would argue if you can so effectively identify your faults and function you're far, far better off than most), but we all do. The key is finding the benefit from their results, and it seems like you've done a fairly good job at that. You seem a lot happier than many other people I've talked to, all of which were fine with ideal upbringing. Again, I continue to admire you. I think I'll take some of this as advice, actually, and put a bit more thought into indulgence on my own end. Couldn't hurt...
Well it could, but it'll be fun.
>I don't embrace not-knowing... I just accept it as a likelihood. But I try like hell to know as much as I can. I've just... learned to be content during the search. ;)
Okay, I can dig that. I just tend to dislike people at either extreme. People who convince themselves that they do know (which is depressingly common) or people who say that the answer is to not care about the question anymore (which feels pretentious and unworkable to me).
>But it does seem like you're in better control than I was afraid you were. That's good. You may have your problems (although I would argue if you can so effectively identify your faults and function you're far, far better off than most), but we all do. The key is finding the benefit from their results, and it seems like you've done a fairly good job at that.
Thank you! I do try to keep a relative balance of things going on whenever I can.
>You seem a lot happier than many other people I've talked to, all of which were fine with ideal upbringing.
Again, thanks. I do have bouts of depression, but for the most part I'm usually pretty content.
>Again, I continue to admire you. I think I'll take some of this as advice, actually, and put a bit more thought into indulgence on my own end. Couldn't hurt...
I had another insight/epiphany/whatever after I read this reply. Regarding death, its inevitability and my fear of nonexistence; I accept that there will be a battle. i do not accept that I will lose.
>Well it could, but it'll be fun.
THAT'S THE SPIRIT! Seriously, I love that attitude. Seems like a lot of people these days can't understand: Fun is worth the risk!
Okay, I can dig that. I just tend to dislike people at either extreme. People who convince themselves that they do know (which is depressingly common) or people who say that the answer is to not care about the question anymore (which feels pretentious and unworkable to me).
>But it does seem like you're in better control than I was afraid you were. That's good. You may have your problems (although I would argue if you can so effectively identify your faults and function you're far, far better off than most), but we all do. The key is finding the benefit from their results, and it seems like you've done a fairly good job at that.
Thank you! I do try to keep a relative balance of things going on whenever I can.
>You seem a lot happier than many other people I've talked to, all of which were fine with ideal upbringing.
Again, thanks. I do have bouts of depression, but for the most part I'm usually pretty content.
>Again, I continue to admire you. I think I'll take some of this as advice, actually, and put a bit more thought into indulgence on my own end. Couldn't hurt...
I had another insight/epiphany/whatever after I read this reply. Regarding death, its inevitability and my fear of nonexistence; I accept that there will be a battle. i do not accept that I will lose.
>Well it could, but it'll be fun.
THAT'S THE SPIRIT! Seriously, I love that attitude. Seems like a lot of people these days can't understand: Fun is worth the risk!
Very commendable. Life is harder on animals than we can imagine. I wish I could do even more to make their short lives comfortable and happy.
But yeah, Val treated Eddie right. Knew what expert advice to follow and what to ignore. Looked after him and took him to the vet regularly. He was her cat; he was just my roommate. I can barely take care of myself; the idea of taking care of another lifeform actually scares me.
But yeah, Val treated Eddie right. Knew what expert advice to follow and what to ignore. Looked after him and took him to the vet regularly. He was her cat; he was just my roommate. I can barely take care of myself; the idea of taking care of another lifeform actually scares me.
Thanks. My mom was determined to not treat her child the same way her mother treated her, yet so fucked up by the abuse she couldn't help but treat me that way. And the duality of that I think was more traumatic than if she'd just been consistently abusive. I don't trust myself not to be like that, so I'm breaking the cycle. I like to think I'd make a good uncle or babysitter though.
I fear death, not because it is the end, but for the fact that it might not be. I do not want to live forever, heck most of the time I don't want to live to the next day. I take comfort in the fact that one day if everything goes right nothing else can happen to me anymore, I won't have to exist, I will no longer have the burden of thinking.
Do you really want nonexistence? Or do you want things to change so existence doesn't hurt so much anymore?
I don't want to live forever. I just want to live long enough to do and see and learn all the things I want to. I want to be able to decide for myself when it's my time.
I don't want to live forever. I just want to live long enough to do and see and learn all the things I want to. I want to be able to decide for myself when it's my time.
Most of this is how I have felt for a long time. I know exactly where you come from when you mention the part about being pissed that my consciousness will forever cease when im gone. Fuck that.
Before I got laid off from a job I had excelled in from 2003 to back in this mid January I had put money aside i a 401k retirement account. In 19 years from now it would have easily been around 125,000 in cold hard cash. Fuck that. I put into motion to close that out and while its incredibly lower due to taxes, penalties, early withdrawal fees, Im going to use it now to live life.
My gut tells me i wont ever live that long to use it anyway, so why bother saving it?
But, what about if you do live longer and its all gone?
Well, lets cross that bridge when it comes, but until then, Im going to make the most out this life (not in a crazy way, but im going to be content) with what i have.
If the end means nothing, then i dont have the worry about "taking it with you", cause I already cashed that bitch in.
Before I got laid off from a job I had excelled in from 2003 to back in this mid January I had put money aside i a 401k retirement account. In 19 years from now it would have easily been around 125,000 in cold hard cash. Fuck that. I put into motion to close that out and while its incredibly lower due to taxes, penalties, early withdrawal fees, Im going to use it now to live life.
My gut tells me i wont ever live that long to use it anyway, so why bother saving it?
But, what about if you do live longer and its all gone?
Well, lets cross that bridge when it comes, but until then, Im going to make the most out this life (not in a crazy way, but im going to be content) with what i have.
If the end means nothing, then i dont have the worry about "taking it with you", cause I already cashed that bitch in.
>I know exactly where you come from when you mention the part about being pissed that my consciousness will forever cease when im gone. Fuck that.
It's one of the reasons I keep writing. If it's true that our only hope at immortality is what we leave behind, then I know my only children will be my novels, stories and essays. I'd better birth as many of them as possible to ensure at least a few outlive me! ;)
>I put into motion to close that out and while its incredibly lower due to taxes, penalties, early withdrawal fees, Im going to use it now to live life.
The majority of people would say that's insanely stupid. While I do think preparing for the future, n general, is a good idea, I think what you did is incredibly brave. Most people swallow the big lie: "Work hard and then retire in happiness!" What really happens is you spend the best years of your life toiling away in misery, then you end up too old to enjoy what you've saved. I'm kinda glad we're seeing a rise in the 'slacker' type. i have an odd feeling humanity will progress more with more people like us who live for the moment.
>If the end means nothing, then i dont have the worry about "taking it with you", cause I already cashed that bitch in.
HA! I love it! That's a great attitude.
It's one of the reasons I keep writing. If it's true that our only hope at immortality is what we leave behind, then I know my only children will be my novels, stories and essays. I'd better birth as many of them as possible to ensure at least a few outlive me! ;)
>I put into motion to close that out and while its incredibly lower due to taxes, penalties, early withdrawal fees, Im going to use it now to live life.
The majority of people would say that's insanely stupid. While I do think preparing for the future, n general, is a good idea, I think what you did is incredibly brave. Most people swallow the big lie: "Work hard and then retire in happiness!" What really happens is you spend the best years of your life toiling away in misery, then you end up too old to enjoy what you've saved. I'm kinda glad we're seeing a rise in the 'slacker' type. i have an odd feeling humanity will progress more with more people like us who live for the moment.
>If the end means nothing, then i dont have the worry about "taking it with you", cause I already cashed that bitch in.
HA! I love it! That's a great attitude.
Brave often means being stupid. Im not going to go globe hopping with it, but I am going to make sure I stay stress free and comfortable while I look for another job. Hopefully that happens soon, but since I have the cash, well, soon will have it, I can comfortably float for about the next year and choose wisely. The only thing that really sucks, If I choose to reinvest what I took out, I have to wait a year. And I cannot do it with the fund management company I had. And I was getting 12.27 percent returns, along with my employers matching funds and I was fully vested (being vested means they cant take it back now, even if I was fired for something horrendous - noted for those that might not know the terms basic meaning).
10 years from now I might curse myself, if I live that long, but I do have that outlook to just enjoy life for what it is.
I moved from the Virginia coalfields to Seattle with 700 dollars and my old army duffel bag filled with what I would need to survive VIA a greyhound bus, and in 13 years I made it. Cars paid off, living in my own home... Nows a bit of a reset, but I was not afraid then, and Im not afraid now. 8-)
10 years from now I might curse myself, if I live that long, but I do have that outlook to just enjoy life for what it is.
I moved from the Virginia coalfields to Seattle with 700 dollars and my old army duffel bag filled with what I would need to survive VIA a greyhound bus, and in 13 years I made it. Cars paid off, living in my own home... Nows a bit of a reset, but I was not afraid then, and Im not afraid now. 8-)
>Brave often means being stupid.
I like you you say that so bluntly. It's absolutely true. When we disregard our own common sense to do something we believe is good, it's called bravery. When bravery fails, we call it stupidity.
>Im not going to go globe hopping with it, but I am going to make sure I stay stress free and comfortable while I look for another job.
Makes sense. When you spend too much time and effort planning for tomorrow, you realize too late that you neglected the NOW, which is all we're really sure we have.
>I was fully vested (being vested means they cant take it back now, even if I was fired for something horrendous - noted for those that might not know the terms basic meaning).
I thought it meant you had on a vest. Waka waka.
>I moved from the Virginia coalfields to Seattle with 700 dollars and my old army duffel bag filled with what I would need to survive VIA a greyhound bus, and in 13 years I made it. Cars paid off, living in my own home... Nows a bit of a reset, but I was not afraid then, and Im not afraid now. 8-)
Awesome. Looking at my own life, I realize that, without one of the worst experience I've ever lived through, I wouldn't have so much of the good I have today. It was absolutely worth it.
I like you you say that so bluntly. It's absolutely true. When we disregard our own common sense to do something we believe is good, it's called bravery. When bravery fails, we call it stupidity.
>Im not going to go globe hopping with it, but I am going to make sure I stay stress free and comfortable while I look for another job.
Makes sense. When you spend too much time and effort planning for tomorrow, you realize too late that you neglected the NOW, which is all we're really sure we have.
>I was fully vested (being vested means they cant take it back now, even if I was fired for something horrendous - noted for those that might not know the terms basic meaning).
I thought it meant you had on a vest. Waka waka.
>I moved from the Virginia coalfields to Seattle with 700 dollars and my old army duffel bag filled with what I would need to survive VIA a greyhound bus, and in 13 years I made it. Cars paid off, living in my own home... Nows a bit of a reset, but I was not afraid then, and Im not afraid now. 8-)
Awesome. Looking at my own life, I realize that, without one of the worst experience I've ever lived through, I wouldn't have so much of the good I have today. It was absolutely worth it.
Ever since I was in 4th grade and read about how the sun would eventually blow up and the universe would collapse or whatever, I think I've carried around the seeds of nihilism.
I was sad for awhile, but eventually I took great comfort in realizing there was no higher meaning or purpose, mostly for the fact that, if there is a higher purpose, there's a pretty huge chance I'm not living up to it.
I was sad for awhile, but eventually I took great comfort in realizing there was no higher meaning or purpose, mostly for the fact that, if there is a higher purpose, there's a pretty huge chance I'm not living up to it.
People will tell you that you are a special snowflake, part of something greater than yourself. Created for the purpose of living to appreciate the beauty of the world before passing on to the next.
People will tell you that you are not special, that you are the same decomposing organic waste as the rest of the world. That you are an accident in an uncaring, chaotic, random universe that won't even acknowledge what you've accomplished or even that you exist at all.
What matters? What determines what matters? Wanna know?
Us.
It doesn't matter (to me) where we come from or how it will all end if it ends at all. Because right here, right now, we are in charge of our own reality.
If life matters to you, live! If clinging to it matters to you, hold on tight! If Eddie matters to you, be proud you made him so happy! If leaving a behind something to be remembered by matters, mission accomplished because I won't forget what you've written!
I wrote this because cheering up anyone who has suffered a loss matters to me, Eddie sounded like such a sweet cat.
People will tell you that you are not special, that you are the same decomposing organic waste as the rest of the world. That you are an accident in an uncaring, chaotic, random universe that won't even acknowledge what you've accomplished or even that you exist at all.
What matters? What determines what matters? Wanna know?
Us.
It doesn't matter (to me) where we come from or how it will all end if it ends at all. Because right here, right now, we are in charge of our own reality.
If life matters to you, live! If clinging to it matters to you, hold on tight! If Eddie matters to you, be proud you made him so happy! If leaving a behind something to be remembered by matters, mission accomplished because I won't forget what you've written!
I wrote this because cheering up anyone who has suffered a loss matters to me, Eddie sounded like such a sweet cat.
>People will tell you that you are a special snowflake
>People will tell you that you are not special
It's been my experience that extremes are very rarely the answer, and the truth is often somewhere in between. I believe people can be as special as they choose to be.
>What matters? What determines what matters? Wanna know?
Us.
Fully. Fucking. Agreed.
>If life matters to you, live! If clinging to it matters to you, hold on tight! If Eddie matters to you, be proud you made him so happy! If leaving a behind something to be remembered by matters, mission accomplished because I won't forget what you've written!
Couldn't have said it better. <claps>
>I wrote this because cheering up anyone who has suffered a loss matters to me, Eddie sounded like such a sweet cat.
Thank you. I dunno if I'd call Eddie sweet, but he was a good cat. Smart, self-reliant, assertive, vocal and handsome. :3
>People will tell you that you are not special
It's been my experience that extremes are very rarely the answer, and the truth is often somewhere in between. I believe people can be as special as they choose to be.
>What matters? What determines what matters? Wanna know?
Us.
Fully. Fucking. Agreed.
>If life matters to you, live! If clinging to it matters to you, hold on tight! If Eddie matters to you, be proud you made him so happy! If leaving a behind something to be remembered by matters, mission accomplished because I won't forget what you've written!
Couldn't have said it better. <claps>
>I wrote this because cheering up anyone who has suffered a loss matters to me, Eddie sounded like such a sweet cat.
Thank you. I dunno if I'd call Eddie sweet, but he was a good cat. Smart, self-reliant, assertive, vocal and handsome. :3
Nothing more true could ever be spoken.
This really struck a chord with me...it scares me when I realize just how pathetically fragile we are as animals.
I like the inclusion of the poem at the end. My grandmother is always raging at the dying of the light...she's either going to die at 75 miles per hour in her convertible, or perfectly content if the Patriots win the Super Bowl when it's her year to exit this earth.
This really struck a chord with me...it scares me when I realize just how pathetically fragile we are as animals.
I like the inclusion of the poem at the end. My grandmother is always raging at the dying of the light...she's either going to die at 75 miles per hour in her convertible, or perfectly content if the Patriots win the Super Bowl when it's her year to exit this earth.
>Nothing more true could ever be spoken.
Thank you. :)
>This really struck a chord with me...it scares me when I realize just how pathetically fragile we are as animals.
Well, I dunno if we're that fragile. We can be, rarely. But barring freak accidents, humans manage to life a fairly long time. Long enough to get a lot of stuff done. My problem isn't with the length of my life, but that I don't think I should have to put up with not knowing when it'll end, or that my body will deteriorate gradually until it can't function anymore.
>I like the inclusion of the poem at the end. My grandmother is always raging at the dying of the light...she's either going to die at 75 miles per hour in her convertible, or perfectly content if the Patriots win the Super Bowl when it's her year to exit this earth.
Kinda like my Aunt Bertha. I was kinda amazed when she died at 94. She was so fucking mean I always assumed death was afraid of her.
Thank you. :)
>This really struck a chord with me...it scares me when I realize just how pathetically fragile we are as animals.
Well, I dunno if we're that fragile. We can be, rarely. But barring freak accidents, humans manage to life a fairly long time. Long enough to get a lot of stuff done. My problem isn't with the length of my life, but that I don't think I should have to put up with not knowing when it'll end, or that my body will deteriorate gradually until it can't function anymore.
>I like the inclusion of the poem at the end. My grandmother is always raging at the dying of the light...she's either going to die at 75 miles per hour in her convertible, or perfectly content if the Patriots win the Super Bowl when it's her year to exit this earth.
Kinda like my Aunt Bertha. I was kinda amazed when she died at 94. She was so fucking mean I always assumed death was afraid of her.
Everyone's dying, it's just a question of how fast.
>Kinda like my Aunt Bertha. I was kinda amazed when she died at 94. She was so fucking mean I always assumed death was afraid of her.
That gave me a giggle.
And for our all sakes, I hope that whatever happens after death is even a little bit as idyllic as your version of Hell.
>Kinda like my Aunt Bertha. I was kinda amazed when she died at 94. She was so fucking mean I always assumed death was afraid of her.
That gave me a giggle.
And for our all sakes, I hope that whatever happens after death is even a little bit as idyllic as your version of Hell.
Very well-written essay about both Eddie and mortality. Sounds like a fine cat that will be missed. My condolences for the loss of Eddie.
Don't know what's in store on the other side, so I say to myself it's best to just do what one thinks is right... as long as what he/she think is right doesn't add up to "death to all who oppose me." lol.
In all seriousness, I think about mortality, too. I've spoken to the heavily religious and I've spoken to the materialists and nihilists -- I think that's the right word, "nihilist" the people which believe in absolutely NOTHING -- and I find those views not for me. I consider that there must be something, but I don't know and I can't know therefore its unproductive to waste time thinking about it for any great length. I also consider what I've observed in others, in daily life: a good chunk of some of my recently deceased relatives passed on before their bodies did via strokes or other mechanical failures. They were no longer the same people afterwards. Perhaps that's why so many people wish not to fade but to be instantly dead when their time comes... though according to a therapist I used to see, one would not be aware if he/she were fading due to a stroke or something similar to that... cognitive abilities would cease.
Personally, I find the belief in energy and reincarnation most plausible, but that's just me. Everybody has their own beliefs and to each his own, I say :)
Don't know what's in store on the other side, so I say to myself it's best to just do what one thinks is right... as long as what he/she think is right doesn't add up to "death to all who oppose me." lol.
In all seriousness, I think about mortality, too. I've spoken to the heavily religious and I've spoken to the materialists and nihilists -- I think that's the right word, "nihilist" the people which believe in absolutely NOTHING -- and I find those views not for me. I consider that there must be something, but I don't know and I can't know therefore its unproductive to waste time thinking about it for any great length. I also consider what I've observed in others, in daily life: a good chunk of some of my recently deceased relatives passed on before their bodies did via strokes or other mechanical failures. They were no longer the same people afterwards. Perhaps that's why so many people wish not to fade but to be instantly dead when their time comes... though according to a therapist I used to see, one would not be aware if he/she were fading due to a stroke or something similar to that... cognitive abilities would cease.
Personally, I find the belief in energy and reincarnation most plausible, but that's just me. Everybody has their own beliefs and to each his own, I say :)
>Don't know what's in store on the other side, so I say to myself it's best to just do what one thinks is right... as long as what he/she think is right doesn't add up to "death to all who oppose me." lol.
I prefer "medium-level public humiliation to all who oppose me" ;)
>I consider that there must be something, but I don't know and I can't know therefore its unproductive to waste time thinking about it for any great length.
Very much agreed. I wish I could make my mind stop dwelling on it. I have better shit to do.
>Personally, I find the belief in energy and reincarnation most plausible, but that's just me. Everybody has their own beliefs and to each his own, I say :)
I suppose I don't mind reincarnating, but I at least want a stop inbetween to get some answers first. ;)
I prefer "medium-level public humiliation to all who oppose me" ;)
>I consider that there must be something, but I don't know and I can't know therefore its unproductive to waste time thinking about it for any great length.
Very much agreed. I wish I could make my mind stop dwelling on it. I have better shit to do.
>Personally, I find the belief in energy and reincarnation most plausible, but that's just me. Everybody has their own beliefs and to each his own, I say :)
I suppose I don't mind reincarnating, but I at least want a stop inbetween to get some answers first. ;)
>Very much agreed. I wish I could make my mind stop dwelling on it. I have better shit to do.
You just lost Eddie and he was dear to you. It makes sense that's only natural to be thinking about such things. My niece and nephew lost a cat a few years ago to cancer and while caring for him briefly so that he could be seen by another vet, I couldn't help but feel a combination of pity for him that gave me desire to preform a coup de grace (which I did not) as well as numerous contemplations about what would be waiting for him after death -- whether or not he would simply cease to be and how my mind could not grasp that unpleasant potential truth. If what happens to us after death is generally on your mind that's a separate issue, but if it is just at the moment that seems completely natural.
You just lost Eddie and he was dear to you. It makes sense that's only natural to be thinking about such things. My niece and nephew lost a cat a few years ago to cancer and while caring for him briefly so that he could be seen by another vet, I couldn't help but feel a combination of pity for him that gave me desire to preform a coup de grace (which I did not) as well as numerous contemplations about what would be waiting for him after death -- whether or not he would simply cease to be and how my mind could not grasp that unpleasant potential truth. If what happens to us after death is generally on your mind that's a separate issue, but if it is just at the moment that seems completely natural.
As far as I can tell, as far as it makes sense, and it does, and as far as I choose to believe two friends of mine who say they remember former lives and choose to consider that, and out of body experiences as evidence, I would say we all get reborn. Each life, each moment is unique, and only immortal in our soul's memory, but none of the lives on this plane of existence is the absolute last. All are as precious as it can get, as an opportunity to experice and grow and make the world a better place for those who come after us.
You have my condolences, and I hope the above gives you hope.
As soon as nanotechnology get good enough, at least death by old age can be prevented, though we still need a solution for the brain memory. Gainig access to the soul's memory to keep stuff in mind and allowing the brain to overwrite itself would be a solution.
You have my condolences, and I hope the above gives you hope.
As soon as nanotechnology get good enough, at least death by old age can be prevented, though we still need a solution for the brain memory. Gainig access to the soul's memory to keep stuff in mind and allowing the brain to overwrite itself would be a solution.
>As far as I can tell, as far as it makes sense, and it does, and as far as I choose to believe two friends of mine who say they remember former lives and choose to consider that, and out of body experiences as evidence,
The skeptic in me says 'anecdotal evidence isn't evidence', but the rest of me says 'if a ton of people have had similar experiences, that's enough for me to at least strongly consider the possibility'. ;)
>As soon as nanotechnology get good enough, at least death by old age can be prevented, though we still need a solution for the brain memory. Gainig access to the soul's memory to keep stuff in mind and allowing the brain to overwrite itself would be a solution.
Oh my yes. I am HUGELY in favor of using technology to make us more than human. In fact, I've been thinking about a nanotechnology-brain-improvement-related story for a long time and hopefully get to writing it soon.
The skeptic in me says 'anecdotal evidence isn't evidence', but the rest of me says 'if a ton of people have had similar experiences, that's enough for me to at least strongly consider the possibility'. ;)
>As soon as nanotechnology get good enough, at least death by old age can be prevented, though we still need a solution for the brain memory. Gainig access to the soul's memory to keep stuff in mind and allowing the brain to overwrite itself would be a solution.
Oh my yes. I am HUGELY in favor of using technology to make us more than human. In fact, I've been thinking about a nanotechnology-brain-improvement-related story for a long time and hopefully get to writing it soon.
I feel ya, Alex. I really do. I, myself, am also terrified by the thought of death.
To not feel
To not think
to not ~know~
...To not exist
.....To Be Forgotten.
That, right there, is my greatest fear. To live and die in obscurity. Yeah, sure, the are people I know who would miss me when I die, but then..when they die...who will remember me then?
Living life balls to the wall is something I never really thought about until recently. I'm not in the greatest shape, but I'm striving to better myself, to become healthy again, to live a longer life in defiance of Death.
The saying goes that those who work all their lives tend to live longer (And look younger) than someone who spends all of their time sitting on their ass.
My best bet is to do something for which I'll be immortalized for. Tat will b hard to do, since damn near everything plausible has been done to death..
To not feel
To not think
to not ~know~
...To not exist
.....To Be Forgotten.
That, right there, is my greatest fear. To live and die in obscurity. Yeah, sure, the are people I know who would miss me when I die, but then..when they die...who will remember me then?
Living life balls to the wall is something I never really thought about until recently. I'm not in the greatest shape, but I'm striving to better myself, to become healthy again, to live a longer life in defiance of Death.
The saying goes that those who work all their lives tend to live longer (And look younger) than someone who spends all of their time sitting on their ass.
My best bet is to do something for which I'll be immortalized for. Tat will b hard to do, since damn near everything plausible has been done to death..
>That, right there, is my greatest fear. To live and die in obscurity. Yeah, sure, the are people I know who would miss me when I die, but then..when they die...who will remember me then?
I completely understand and empathize. It's one of the reasons I write so much and am able to finish what I write. I want to leave behind as much of what I'm good at as I can.
>The saying goes that those who work all their lives tend to live longer (And look younger) than someone who spends all of their time sitting on their ass.
Just keep in mind that 'working' and 'keeping active' can be two different things. ;)
I'm pretty sedentary myself, but I'm trying to do more walking.
>My best bet is to do something for which I'll be immortalized for. Tat will b hard to do, since damn near everything plausible has been done to death..
You could always shoot a president! ;D
I completely understand and empathize. It's one of the reasons I write so much and am able to finish what I write. I want to leave behind as much of what I'm good at as I can.
>The saying goes that those who work all their lives tend to live longer (And look younger) than someone who spends all of their time sitting on their ass.
Just keep in mind that 'working' and 'keeping active' can be two different things. ;)
I'm pretty sedentary myself, but I'm trying to do more walking.
>My best bet is to do something for which I'll be immortalized for. Tat will b hard to do, since damn near everything plausible has been done to death..
You could always shoot a president! ;D
The meaning of life? Just be, so be good. I like the one alluded to in the Brin novel 'Kiln People' comparing humanity to a bunch of coral washed up on the shore. Here we are, so here we stand. So stand by those who stand with you. People, animals. One of the traits that gives the events of our lives impact is loyalty. It sounds like Eddie was a real good cat and a fine housepet.
A question then.
What are you?
If you are your body, who you are now will be gone in a few scant monthes as old cells die and new cells are made to replace them. All of the matter in your body will have been flushed out and an entirely new body will stand in it's place. And yet, this completely new body is you too.
So instead of the body you are, you are actually the plans to create a body.
Where does this exist?
DNA? That's enough to make a cell, but is it enough to recreate all the little new things? Can DNA record a scar? Yet that scar does not disappear, even when an entirely new body is created every few months.
What about your memories? They can not be stored in DNA. Are they stored in imperfect cells that are replaced over time? Do the new cells recreate the memories before the old cells die? And what about the shear quantities of memories available to you? Neuro-scientists already suspect that the brain can remember far more than it should be able to given its physical size and limitations.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Quantu.....brain_dynamics
(Not, I am not a quantum physicist, so I'm probably getting the details wrong.)
There is a theory that the brain uses quantum physics to increase its storage capacity. And since quantum physics is the study of information and how it affects the "physical world", it is a sensible fit. So by this theory, you would have your own personal quantum field in which you write everything that makes you you.
Quanta don't seem to obey the same rules that physical objects do. There is entanglement. It's possible to tie two quantum fields together. If one changes, the other does too. This happens regardless of location. Also, it is possible to the quanta of one field to affect another physical process elsewhere.
Are you noticing a trend there? What is a soul but an non-physical field that contains all of your thoughts and memories? What is a ghost, but a soul that is entangled in a certain area?
The idea of an afterlife does not seem all that far-fetched to me in this light. Although I imagine it would be nothing like the things mentioned in religion. It would be more like the society that existed in the quantum field.
What are you?
If you are your body, who you are now will be gone in a few scant monthes as old cells die and new cells are made to replace them. All of the matter in your body will have been flushed out and an entirely new body will stand in it's place. And yet, this completely new body is you too.
So instead of the body you are, you are actually the plans to create a body.
Where does this exist?
DNA? That's enough to make a cell, but is it enough to recreate all the little new things? Can DNA record a scar? Yet that scar does not disappear, even when an entirely new body is created every few months.
What about your memories? They can not be stored in DNA. Are they stored in imperfect cells that are replaced over time? Do the new cells recreate the memories before the old cells die? And what about the shear quantities of memories available to you? Neuro-scientists already suspect that the brain can remember far more than it should be able to given its physical size and limitations.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Quantu.....brain_dynamics
(Not, I am not a quantum physicist, so I'm probably getting the details wrong.)
There is a theory that the brain uses quantum physics to increase its storage capacity. And since quantum physics is the study of information and how it affects the "physical world", it is a sensible fit. So by this theory, you would have your own personal quantum field in which you write everything that makes you you.
Quanta don't seem to obey the same rules that physical objects do. There is entanglement. It's possible to tie two quantum fields together. If one changes, the other does too. This happens regardless of location. Also, it is possible to the quanta of one field to affect another physical process elsewhere.
Are you noticing a trend there? What is a soul but an non-physical field that contains all of your thoughts and memories? What is a ghost, but a soul that is entangled in a certain area?
The idea of an afterlife does not seem all that far-fetched to me in this light. Although I imagine it would be nothing like the things mentioned in religion. It would be more like the society that existed in the quantum field.
I really don't think much about the specifics. I like the idea of there being a possiblr scientific concept of a soul, but it's not necessary for me to have that to believe in one.
Like Yaweh said in the Bible: "I am that I am." I am the part of 'me' that can say I am. It doesn't matter what that part is or what it's called. It doesn't matter how religion or science defines it. I know I am.
And as much as I've heard about neuroscience, none of it matters to me. It's probably the lone science where I will stubbornly refuse any facts put in front of me. The idea that I am just a slab of grey cells is as ridiculous to me as it is repugnant. I am more, because I know I am more. No explanation of how the human brain works seems enough to explain how my mind works. It can't explain where my art and story ideas come from; it can't explain my likes and dislikes in music, it can't explain my sense of humor. It can't explain why I am compelled to create stories about characters that live in my mind as real as anyone I know. I think, therefore I am, and the only thing I know with 100% pure certainty is my own existence. I'll trust science on 99.9999% of everything else, but I know my own mind more than every scientist who ever lived ever could.
Like Yaweh said in the Bible: "I am that I am." I am the part of 'me' that can say I am. It doesn't matter what that part is or what it's called. It doesn't matter how religion or science defines it. I know I am.
And as much as I've heard about neuroscience, none of it matters to me. It's probably the lone science where I will stubbornly refuse any facts put in front of me. The idea that I am just a slab of grey cells is as ridiculous to me as it is repugnant. I am more, because I know I am more. No explanation of how the human brain works seems enough to explain how my mind works. It can't explain where my art and story ideas come from; it can't explain my likes and dislikes in music, it can't explain my sense of humor. It can't explain why I am compelled to create stories about characters that live in my mind as real as anyone I know. I think, therefore I am, and the only thing I know with 100% pure certainty is my own existence. I'll trust science on 99.9999% of everything else, but I know my own mind more than every scientist who ever lived ever could.
I have no problem with that. If your direct experience gives you information that contradicts what people tell you, you should got with your direct experience... usually at least.
Oh, also a comment on food choices. There is more to food than taste, and there is more to healthy food than longer years. I find that certain foods make me feel good, and certain foods sit heavy in me and make me feel like crap for an hour or so after eating. That's why I try to avoid greasy food. Sure, it may taste good, but the after effect is not very fun. Conversely, fruits and veggies tend to leave me feeling more energized, so that factors into my decision to eat them.
Sadly, the money cost of bagged salad and the time cost of preparing it yourself tends to keep me from eating a rather delicious veggie dish.
Oh, also a comment on food choices. There is more to food than taste, and there is more to healthy food than longer years. I find that certain foods make me feel good, and certain foods sit heavy in me and make me feel like crap for an hour or so after eating. That's why I try to avoid greasy food. Sure, it may taste good, but the after effect is not very fun. Conversely, fruits and veggies tend to leave me feeling more energized, so that factors into my decision to eat them.
Sadly, the money cost of bagged salad and the time cost of preparing it yourself tends to keep me from eating a rather delicious veggie dish.
>I have no problem with that. If your direct experience gives you information that contradicts what people tell you, you should got with your direct experience... usually at least.
Yes. Especially that last part. Even when I'm convinced of something, I intentionally let in doubts, either to increase my confidence when I see they're unfounded, or keep me in check if they have a point.
>Oh, also a comment on food choices. There is more to food than taste, and there is more to healthy food than longer years. I find that certain foods make me feel good, and certain foods sit heavy in me and make me feel like crap for an hour or so after eating. That's why I try to avoid greasy food. Sure, it may taste good, but the after effect is not very fun. Conversely, fruits and veggies tend to leave me feeling more energized, so that factors into my decision to eat them.
I've heard other people say this. I dunno if it's true for me or not. I feel fine after eating most things, so to see any effect I'd have to go, say, a week eating just 'healthy' foods, then another week just eating 'junk'. Although I do enjoy eating a big meal just before bed, since it makes my dreams supervivid, and I rarely have nightmares.
>Sadly, the money cost of bagged salad and the time cost of preparing it yourself tends to keep me from eating a rather delicious veggie dish.
Reminds me of a point I tried to argue with a hardcore vegan who wanted to convert to the world; give a hobo ten bucks for a meal and he's more likely to go to a cheap, meat-filled fast food place than a vegetarian cafe.
Yes. Especially that last part. Even when I'm convinced of something, I intentionally let in doubts, either to increase my confidence when I see they're unfounded, or keep me in check if they have a point.
>Oh, also a comment on food choices. There is more to food than taste, and there is more to healthy food than longer years. I find that certain foods make me feel good, and certain foods sit heavy in me and make me feel like crap for an hour or so after eating. That's why I try to avoid greasy food. Sure, it may taste good, but the after effect is not very fun. Conversely, fruits and veggies tend to leave me feeling more energized, so that factors into my decision to eat them.
I've heard other people say this. I dunno if it's true for me or not. I feel fine after eating most things, so to see any effect I'd have to go, say, a week eating just 'healthy' foods, then another week just eating 'junk'. Although I do enjoy eating a big meal just before bed, since it makes my dreams supervivid, and I rarely have nightmares.
>Sadly, the money cost of bagged salad and the time cost of preparing it yourself tends to keep me from eating a rather delicious veggie dish.
Reminds me of a point I tried to argue with a hardcore vegan who wanted to convert to the world; give a hobo ten bucks for a meal and he's more likely to go to a cheap, meat-filled fast food place than a vegetarian cafe.
"She lived a great life and died wealthy, unforgotten, with her family around her. Where do I sign?" - Joan Rivers regarding Elizabeth Taylor
I like that quote; whatever game we're all playing, there are ways to win.
In my opinion, you're winning. You have an amazing creative drive and you don't take shit from anyone. Your existence makes the world a better, more vibrant place, Alex. Just keep doing what you do and worry about what comes after when you get there.
I like that quote; whatever game we're all playing, there are ways to win.
In my opinion, you're winning. You have an amazing creative drive and you don't take shit from anyone. Your existence makes the world a better, more vibrant place, Alex. Just keep doing what you do and worry about what comes after when you get there.
Good luck with "living your lifes" as you want it !
Which makes me wonder what you do in life apart from writing excellent or thought-provoking text on fur-affinity (kind of sad it's only FA and not a real blog, which is really more convenient in a lot of way !)
Let me tell you I'm sorry for your cat.
On a really rude note, but I don't think you'll mind: I was looking at the list of new submission in my watch list on FA to wank... you complety killed the mood !
For some reason, I really appreciate that you also quoted scientists in your text, even if I expect more to hear about philosopher's thoughts in this kind of text.
I may have a begin of explanation about why you don't share our thoughts, a famous biologist explained it to me one night, and it seems really true to me.
Us, people who study or do research in physic (mathematic for me) are so used to consider that time is just one dimension which is not different than the other one that it just doesn't make more sens to be mad not to living after our death. It's just like if we were mad that we didn't live before beeing born. It makes no sens. Past and future are the same thing.
An other comparison: we live in a small part of the galaxy, we never leave the earth (a few people went to the moon, that still really close to the earth), but it's ok to be confined in such a small place, and not to be able to go travel in other solar system... We know that the interval or location where one can go in a life is really small, such is the interval of time.
I doubt I'm clear (especially since I don't really speaks english, but french), but that was just my two pences.
Which makes me wonder what you do in life apart from writing excellent or thought-provoking text on fur-affinity (kind of sad it's only FA and not a real blog, which is really more convenient in a lot of way !)
Let me tell you I'm sorry for your cat.
On a really rude note, but I don't think you'll mind: I was looking at the list of new submission in my watch list on FA to wank... you complety killed the mood !
For some reason, I really appreciate that you also quoted scientists in your text, even if I expect more to hear about philosopher's thoughts in this kind of text.
I may have a begin of explanation about why you don't share our thoughts, a famous biologist explained it to me one night, and it seems really true to me.
Us, people who study or do research in physic (mathematic for me) are so used to consider that time is just one dimension which is not different than the other one that it just doesn't make more sens to be mad not to living after our death. It's just like if we were mad that we didn't live before beeing born. It makes no sens. Past and future are the same thing.
An other comparison: we live in a small part of the galaxy, we never leave the earth (a few people went to the moon, that still really close to the earth), but it's ok to be confined in such a small place, and not to be able to go travel in other solar system... We know that the interval or location where one can go in a life is really small, such is the interval of time.
I doubt I'm clear (especially since I don't really speaks english, but french), but that was just my two pences.
>Which makes me wonder what you do in life apart from writing excellent or thought-provoking text on fur-affinity
A lot of my life is spent on unceasing input. If I'm not writing, I'm reading, or watching a movie, or listening to music. There's always something coming into my head. I want it all.
>On a really rude note, but I don't think you'll mind: I was looking at the list of new submission in my watch list on FA to wank... you complety killed the mood !
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAA!! <wipes tears from eyes> Oh man, sorry about that!
>For some reason, I really appreciate that you also quoted scientists in your text, even if I expect more to hear about philosopher's thoughts in this kind of text.
I guess because they come closest to having an authoritative word on the subject. Although it's still a subject we can only guess at and never know.
>Us, people who study or do research in physic (mathematic for me) are so used to consider that time is just one dimension which is not different than the other one that it just doesn't make more sens to be mad not to living after our death. It's just like if we were mad that we didn't live before beeing born. It makes no sens. Past and future are the same thing.
Huh! Interesting idea there. But still, from my perspective, I'm still moving inexorably towards old age and death, and I'm not too happy about that. If I aged backwards that might be kinda cool.
>An other comparison: we live in a small part of the galaxy, we never leave the earth (a few people went to the moon, that still really close to the earth), but it's ok to be confined in such a small place, and not to be able to go travel in other solar system... We know that the interval or location where one can go in a life is really small, such is the interval of time.
And I'm pissed about that too! I don't like knowing there's a finite amount of places in this world I could go. If nothing else, I'd like to know about other worlds just to know the choice exists.
>I doubt I'm clear (especially since I don't really speaks english, but french), but that was just my two pences.
Don't worry; your words were clearer than plenty native English speakers' I've seen on this site. ;)
A lot of my life is spent on unceasing input. If I'm not writing, I'm reading, or watching a movie, or listening to music. There's always something coming into my head. I want it all.
>On a really rude note, but I don't think you'll mind: I was looking at the list of new submission in my watch list on FA to wank... you complety killed the mood !
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAA!! <wipes tears from eyes> Oh man, sorry about that!
>For some reason, I really appreciate that you also quoted scientists in your text, even if I expect more to hear about philosopher's thoughts in this kind of text.
I guess because they come closest to having an authoritative word on the subject. Although it's still a subject we can only guess at and never know.
>Us, people who study or do research in physic (mathematic for me) are so used to consider that time is just one dimension which is not different than the other one that it just doesn't make more sens to be mad not to living after our death. It's just like if we were mad that we didn't live before beeing born. It makes no sens. Past and future are the same thing.
Huh! Interesting idea there. But still, from my perspective, I'm still moving inexorably towards old age and death, and I'm not too happy about that. If I aged backwards that might be kinda cool.
>An other comparison: we live in a small part of the galaxy, we never leave the earth (a few people went to the moon, that still really close to the earth), but it's ok to be confined in such a small place, and not to be able to go travel in other solar system... We know that the interval or location where one can go in a life is really small, such is the interval of time.
And I'm pissed about that too! I don't like knowing there's a finite amount of places in this world I could go. If nothing else, I'd like to know about other worlds just to know the choice exists.
>I doubt I'm clear (especially since I don't really speaks english, but french), but that was just my two pences.
Don't worry; your words were clearer than plenty native English speakers' I've seen on this site. ;)
I have no fear of death, but that's because I have nothing to lose in life. To me, death is victory—whether I live in in some other way, or simply cease to exist, (by the way, I've analyzed my logic and realized it's more scientific to be a weak agnostic than a strong agnostic) I win either way. What do I win against? This whole fucking world! Against being at all!
Why do you ask? Well, that's simple. I was born to be alone, live alone, die alone. Nothing can remedy this. Here's why in a little journal entry I wrote which I titled: The Sorry State of Being a Furry.
I am a furry. No, I feel no spiritual connection to furries—either the people or the characters. No, I’ve never attended a furry convention or dressed in a fursuit, and probably never will. And yes, it is sexual… but then again isn’t everything?
I don’t know if I was born this way, or made this way, or even that I merely wanted to be this way. I only claim that I am this way now, however I got here. Though from my fantasies as an early child I suspect it's been with me a long, long time.
Some people, family included, asked me in the past if I were bisexual. I always dismissed the question not because it made me uncomfortable, but because I honestly don’t know the answer, and probably never will. If I were bisexual, or even a completely flaming fag, it would be an improvement! At least then there’d be some slim chance of ever finding a significant other. But that can never happen.
Simply put, I don’t like the appearance of the human body. Many liberal artist types defend nudity by saying the human body is beautiful. I agree with the logic, but not the sentiment. The human body is ugly to me—not shameful as some conservative types may imply, but physically unpleasant in appearance.
Our hair grows either in patches or sparse strips. Our faces are as flat pancakes with ears like pretzels and noses like bird beaks. Hard as I try, I can’t find something like that attractive. I can't even find that natural, even though I know better.
What’s the solution, bestiality? That’s nothing more than using an animal to masturbate with. A handful of glycerol accomplishes the same thing with none of the effort or risk of prosecution. Even zoophilia is a hollow pursuit in the end—to me at least. feel free to disagree if you want; I won't even argue with you on that—. An animal could love a human or even love fucking a human, but can never give the intellectual affection I need from a lover.
What am I left with but a picture of an otter on a computer screen? Not one that crawls and squeaks, but one that walks and talks, an impossible fantasy of something truly beautiful that can give me my so needed intellectual affection. The fur, the muzzle, the tail, the whiskers and tiny round ears, the upright walk and speech and intellect! How could I not fall in love with such a creature?
But they don’t exist. I’m trapped with a fantasy of a romance that can never be, expressible only in pictures or stories. Do you feel sorry for me? Don’t bother. I feel sorry for me.
I dreamed once of a naga lying on top of me, similar to the ones Kyoht on Deviantart draws, only female. Her arms and tail wrapped around me. There was no sex or even kissing, just holding. I’ve never felt anything so perfect. Then I woke up, and I realized I don't belong.
Why do you ask? Well, that's simple. I was born to be alone, live alone, die alone. Nothing can remedy this. Here's why in a little journal entry I wrote which I titled: The Sorry State of Being a Furry.
I am a furry. No, I feel no spiritual connection to furries—either the people or the characters. No, I’ve never attended a furry convention or dressed in a fursuit, and probably never will. And yes, it is sexual… but then again isn’t everything?
I don’t know if I was born this way, or made this way, or even that I merely wanted to be this way. I only claim that I am this way now, however I got here. Though from my fantasies as an early child I suspect it's been with me a long, long time.
Some people, family included, asked me in the past if I were bisexual. I always dismissed the question not because it made me uncomfortable, but because I honestly don’t know the answer, and probably never will. If I were bisexual, or even a completely flaming fag, it would be an improvement! At least then there’d be some slim chance of ever finding a significant other. But that can never happen.
Simply put, I don’t like the appearance of the human body. Many liberal artist types defend nudity by saying the human body is beautiful. I agree with the logic, but not the sentiment. The human body is ugly to me—not shameful as some conservative types may imply, but physically unpleasant in appearance.
Our hair grows either in patches or sparse strips. Our faces are as flat pancakes with ears like pretzels and noses like bird beaks. Hard as I try, I can’t find something like that attractive. I can't even find that natural, even though I know better.
What’s the solution, bestiality? That’s nothing more than using an animal to masturbate with. A handful of glycerol accomplishes the same thing with none of the effort or risk of prosecution. Even zoophilia is a hollow pursuit in the end—to me at least. feel free to disagree if you want; I won't even argue with you on that—. An animal could love a human or even love fucking a human, but can never give the intellectual affection I need from a lover.
What am I left with but a picture of an otter on a computer screen? Not one that crawls and squeaks, but one that walks and talks, an impossible fantasy of something truly beautiful that can give me my so needed intellectual affection. The fur, the muzzle, the tail, the whiskers and tiny round ears, the upright walk and speech and intellect! How could I not fall in love with such a creature?
But they don’t exist. I’m trapped with a fantasy of a romance that can never be, expressible only in pictures or stories. Do you feel sorry for me? Don’t bother. I feel sorry for me.
I dreamed once of a naga lying on top of me, similar to the ones Kyoht on Deviantart draws, only female. Her arms and tail wrapped around me. There was no sex or even kissing, just holding. I’ve never felt anything so perfect. Then I woke up, and I realized I don't belong.
This is one of the hugest reasons why I hope there is an afterlife. If there is an afterlife, it means a chance exists for me to find the person responsible for my being born with this malfunctioning brain and PUNCH THEM REPEATEDLY.
I completely understand you. I don't find humans sexually attractive either. In my case, I've largely trained my mind to accept that fantasy is the only place I will find sexual release. I'm content with that now.
I completely understand you. I don't find humans sexually attractive either. In my case, I've largely trained my mind to accept that fantasy is the only place I will find sexual release. I'm content with that now.
Well, what keeps me alive is the burden of having a conscience. I'm not not enough of a heartless bastard to disregard what killing myself will do to my family. I just have too much empathy for other people to take that route. In the meantime I really have no ambition in life except to work at Winco grocery—it's a co-op, so they got good benefits and retirement—and spend my free time writing Pokemon smut, which I'm actually rather proud of! I've got the same username on AGNPH if you want to check it out.
Speaking of which, I've finally made up my mind between Star Wars and Pokemon. My dream is that if there is life-after-death—purely hypothetically—that I'd be reincarnated in the Pokemon world.
You know, TVTropes listed Kefka as a "Complete Monster", meaning simply: a villain utterly impossible to sympathize with or even comprehend. Oddly enough though, on my very worst days, I sort of do sympathize with him.
"Why do people build things they know will just be destroyed? Why do they cling to life knowing they can't live forever? Think of how meaningless each of your lives is. I will destroy everything! I will create a monument to nonexistence!"
Of course, that's only on days so shitty they only come a few times a year, if you know what I'm talking about. Still, that's kind of scary.
This whole conversation also reminds me of another famous quote...
"My greatest fear is that no one will remember me after I die."
~Some dead guy.
Speaking of which, I've finally made up my mind between Star Wars and Pokemon. My dream is that if there is life-after-death—purely hypothetically—that I'd be reincarnated in the Pokemon world.
You know, TVTropes listed Kefka as a "Complete Monster", meaning simply: a villain utterly impossible to sympathize with or even comprehend. Oddly enough though, on my very worst days, I sort of do sympathize with him.
"Why do people build things they know will just be destroyed? Why do they cling to life knowing they can't live forever? Think of how meaningless each of your lives is. I will destroy everything! I will create a monument to nonexistence!"
Of course, that's only on days so shitty they only come a few times a year, if you know what I'm talking about. Still, that's kind of scary.
This whole conversation also reminds me of another famous quote...
"My greatest fear is that no one will remember me after I die."
~Some dead guy.
>Well, what keeps me alive is the burden of having a conscience. I'm not not enough of a heartless bastard to disregard what killing myself will do to my family. I just have too much empathy for other people to take that route.
Perfectly understandable.
>Speaking of which, I've finally made up my mind between Star Wars and Pokemon. My dream is that if there is life-after-death—purely hypothetically—that I'd be reincarnated in the Pokemon world.
If there are infinite afterlives, why not a Star Wars world with Pokémon?
"Why do people build things they know will just be destroyed? Why do they cling to life knowing they can't live forever? Think of how meaningless each of your lives is. I will destroy everything! I will create a monument to nonexistence!"
To Kefka I'd say, "The struggle makes it worth it. The defiance against time and entropy makes it worth it. For some of us at least."
Of course, that's only on days so shitty they only come a few times a year, if you know what I'm talking about. Still, that's kind of scary.
Oh yeah. I have had those days too. Where the very idea of living until tomorrow seems patently absurd.
>"My greatest fear is that no one will remember me after I die."
~Some dead guy.
My greatest fear is lesbian tarantulas.
Perfectly understandable.
>Speaking of which, I've finally made up my mind between Star Wars and Pokemon. My dream is that if there is life-after-death—purely hypothetically—that I'd be reincarnated in the Pokemon world.
If there are infinite afterlives, why not a Star Wars world with Pokémon?
"Why do people build things they know will just be destroyed? Why do they cling to life knowing they can't live forever? Think of how meaningless each of your lives is. I will destroy everything! I will create a monument to nonexistence!"
To Kefka I'd say, "The struggle makes it worth it. The defiance against time and entropy makes it worth it. For some of us at least."
Of course, that's only on days so shitty they only come a few times a year, if you know what I'm talking about. Still, that's kind of scary.
Oh yeah. I have had those days too. Where the very idea of living until tomorrow seems patently absurd.
>"My greatest fear is that no one will remember me after I die."
~Some dead guy.
My greatest fear is lesbian tarantulas.
>If there are infinite afterlives, why not a Star Wars world with Pokémon?
Because that would just be too confusing.
>My greatest fear is lesbian tarantulas.
You fucking asshole! Damn you, you sonofabitch! Why in the flying-frog's-four-armed-fuck did you have to say that!? Thanks a lot for putting that image in my head, you piece of shit! I don't know if I'll be able to sleep tonight because of you!
Because that would just be too confusing.
>My greatest fear is lesbian tarantulas.
You fucking asshole! Damn you, you sonofabitch! Why in the flying-frog's-four-armed-fuck did you have to say that!? Thanks a lot for putting that image in my head, you piece of shit! I don't know if I'll be able to sleep tonight because of you!
>Because that would just be too confusing.
I think you mean to say 'badass'. Picture if you will, Darth Vader riding a Ghyrados.
>You fucking asshole! Damn you, you sonofabitch! Why in the flying-frog's-four-armed-fuck did you have to say that!? Thanks a lot for putting that image in my head, you piece of shit! I don't know if I'll be able to sleep tonight because of you!
WAHAHAHAHAA!! That is among the greatest replies I have ever received. :)
I think you mean to say 'badass'. Picture if you will, Darth Vader riding a Ghyrados.
>You fucking asshole! Damn you, you sonofabitch! Why in the flying-frog's-four-armed-fuck did you have to say that!? Thanks a lot for putting that image in my head, you piece of shit! I don't know if I'll be able to sleep tonight because of you!
WAHAHAHAHAA!! That is among the greatest replies I have ever received. :)
Well, that killed my boner.
In all seriousness, I've lost my fair share of cats. Most recently my cat had gotten sick, and while we were financially challenged at the time and my mom was adamant that going to the vet was a waste of time since we couldn't afford treatment, I convinced her to go anyway. He died just as she grabbed the keys and we were walking out the door. There are fewer "life just shit in my cornflakes" moments than when something like that happens, in my experience.
As for the rest, I have known and accepted the fact that the universe and all of existence doesn't give two shits about me, and that I will live out my life without making any real impact on anything. From the first moment of realizing this my attitude has been "it doesn't care? Well then fuck it, who needs you?" I see no reason in trying to live up to something that will never be lived up to, so let it all burn if that's what it wants. In the mean time, I'll be chilling with my choice few good friends, playing some Metal Gear and drinking cream soda. Maybe eating some pizza too, since there are few things in this world better than a really good pizza.
It's times like this one has an appreciation for sites like TV Tropes, since they provide so many wonderful quotes. The few that sprung to mind reading this were "Sometimes, the "light" has no purpose in being sent other than in the sending; the dying world might not see themselves as able to help others, and just wants to shout its existence against the cold void of time and space." and "I used to think it was awful that life was so unfair. Then I thought, 'wouldn't it be much worse if life were fair, and all the terrible things that happen to us come because we actually deserve them?' So now I take great comfort in the general hostility and unfairness of the universe."
Powerful words my good sir. Words to live by. If nothing else is gonna give a shit about us but us, than why live for anything else?
In all seriousness, I've lost my fair share of cats. Most recently my cat had gotten sick, and while we were financially challenged at the time and my mom was adamant that going to the vet was a waste of time since we couldn't afford treatment, I convinced her to go anyway. He died just as she grabbed the keys and we were walking out the door. There are fewer "life just shit in my cornflakes" moments than when something like that happens, in my experience.
As for the rest, I have known and accepted the fact that the universe and all of existence doesn't give two shits about me, and that I will live out my life without making any real impact on anything. From the first moment of realizing this my attitude has been "it doesn't care? Well then fuck it, who needs you?" I see no reason in trying to live up to something that will never be lived up to, so let it all burn if that's what it wants. In the mean time, I'll be chilling with my choice few good friends, playing some Metal Gear and drinking cream soda. Maybe eating some pizza too, since there are few things in this world better than a really good pizza.
It's times like this one has an appreciation for sites like TV Tropes, since they provide so many wonderful quotes. The few that sprung to mind reading this were "Sometimes, the "light" has no purpose in being sent other than in the sending; the dying world might not see themselves as able to help others, and just wants to shout its existence against the cold void of time and space." and "I used to think it was awful that life was so unfair. Then I thought, 'wouldn't it be much worse if life were fair, and all the terrible things that happen to us come because we actually deserve them?' So now I take great comfort in the general hostility and unfairness of the universe."
Powerful words my good sir. Words to live by. If nothing else is gonna give a shit about us but us, than why live for anything else?
>Well, that killed my boner.
Sorry 'bout that, mate.
>He died just as she grabbed the keys and we were walking out the door. There are fewer "life just shit in my cornflakes" moments than when something like that happens, in my experience.
Look at it this way; maybe your cat chose to die at that moment to help you save money! ;)
>I see no reason in trying to live up to something that will never be lived up to, so let it all burn if that's what it wants. In the mean time, I'll be chilling with my choice few good friends, playing some Metal Gear and drinking cream soda. Maybe eating some pizza too, since there are few things in this world better than a really good pizza.
Lots of agreement here. If we have just one life, it makes sense to enjoy every moment as much as possible. I do hope to leave some mark though. For instance, I write because I enjoy it. But I finish my stories and post them so that other people can read them.
>I used to think it was awful that life was so unfair. Then I thought, 'wouldn't it be much worse if life were fair, and all the terrible things that happen to us come because we actually deserve them?' So now I take great comfort in the general hostility and unfairness of the universe.
I've seen that quote before and I dislike it. I would much rather there be ANY kind of fairness to the universe. If for no other reason than that it could potentially be argued with. Also, if there is some sort of karma being applied to my life, judging by my own ratio of happiness to misery, I'd say I'm a pretty okay person. I'd rather know that my life is good because I deserve it than that I just got lucky.
>Powerful words my good sir. Words to live by. If nothing else is gonna give a shit about us but us, than why live for anything else?
There may not be a deity out there, but there's other people on this planet with us. It doesn't hurt to live for them at least a little. :)
Sorry 'bout that, mate.
>He died just as she grabbed the keys and we were walking out the door. There are fewer "life just shit in my cornflakes" moments than when something like that happens, in my experience.
Look at it this way; maybe your cat chose to die at that moment to help you save money! ;)
>I see no reason in trying to live up to something that will never be lived up to, so let it all burn if that's what it wants. In the mean time, I'll be chilling with my choice few good friends, playing some Metal Gear and drinking cream soda. Maybe eating some pizza too, since there are few things in this world better than a really good pizza.
Lots of agreement here. If we have just one life, it makes sense to enjoy every moment as much as possible. I do hope to leave some mark though. For instance, I write because I enjoy it. But I finish my stories and post them so that other people can read them.
>I used to think it was awful that life was so unfair. Then I thought, 'wouldn't it be much worse if life were fair, and all the terrible things that happen to us come because we actually deserve them?' So now I take great comfort in the general hostility and unfairness of the universe.
I've seen that quote before and I dislike it. I would much rather there be ANY kind of fairness to the universe. If for no other reason than that it could potentially be argued with. Also, if there is some sort of karma being applied to my life, judging by my own ratio of happiness to misery, I'd say I'm a pretty okay person. I'd rather know that my life is good because I deserve it than that I just got lucky.
>Powerful words my good sir. Words to live by. If nothing else is gonna give a shit about us but us, than why live for anything else?
There may not be a deity out there, but there's other people on this planet with us. It doesn't hurt to live for them at least a little. :)
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