Synopsis: In this chapter, Jack must do the most sorrowful and sacrificing of things in order to protect the thing he cares for most. He has learned that in order to get into the light, one must pass through the darkness. But is there someone there to save him from making the biggest mistake of his life?

This is probably the chapter I have been envisioning for months, the most emotionally energized and sensational one that I have been dying to have written down. I am not sure if I'm entirely happy with how it came out, but I'm glad that I've made it this far. I wasn't even sure Jack and Rayne were ever going to make it past that dilapidated church or not. But now I'm so happy to have this written out and BlazeDr, I think this is the scene I want drawn, where Jack is up on the thing and he's howling with the lightning just touching the tree. That's the one, I know it for sure. For the rest of you, I'm so glad you've been able to stick around for this long and I hope you enjoy this. I'm going to assure you that this is not the end, there is more to come. Please, I beg of you, favorite and leave a comment before you go. Because if you leave too quickly, you might miss the real end. Peace.
_______________________________________________________________________

Chapter 16: . . . And On That Starry, Starry Night . . .

The rain batters down upon the metal top of the camper, pounding down and creating a sound like a cat dancing on a hot tin roof. Outside the wind rocks the pickup truck to and fro, threatening to overturn it and thrust it about in the rage of nature. Lighting pierces the darkness and the subsequent roll of thunder, like the detonation of artillery shells, fills the void created between swaths of pouring rain.
I drop my jacket down onto the top of that fold out table, its pockets heavy with all of my belongings. My boots, my wallet, my watch, even my belt are left to stay dry here among this makeshift home. The keys to the vehicle have been placed down onto the white plastic wood, its silver Chrysler insignia shining and glimmering in the low light flickering above.
Lifting my eyes to look out of the broad window, I stare out through the beads of storm water running down the glass. Rayne is somewhere out there, caught in this typhoon which has almost mystically followed us across the country. My heart and stomach sting with the thought that I have driven her from the only oasis in this Empty Quarter and have forced her to die amongst the sand and scorpions.
All that I can hope is that she’ll make her way back here and find all that I have left. I can only pray to whatever God may be listening to make sure she is the one that stumbles out alive. But the vice grip that holds my stomach and heart captive wheels down tighter at the passing thought and I wrap my claws around the edge of the table.
I have to get out of here; I have to get moving before some act of God makes me change my mind. Thrusting myself away from the table, I begin towards the door. As I approach it, I begin to feel myself go very cold. Through the black pads on the bottom of my paws, the linoleum floor is ice. The feeling burrows through the thick fur that wraps me whole and tingles at my skin. Even the breath I draw has lost all warmth.
But a quick swallow and the tuck of the tail between my legs persuades me onwards. The metal door swings open at the very touch of my fingers and claws and as I step forward, I am met by a freezing wall of steel knives crashing down upon my body. The rain falls as buckshot from the sky, pounding my body and drenching me in mere moments.
My paws go down into an already rising puddle at the bottom of the step, splashing upwards and soaking my jeans. Rolling my face backwards, I look into the sky and shut my eyes, feeling the water rush into the dips of my eyes and leach the gel that keeps my hair down from each strand on my head.
As I drop my face forward, the water rushing down my muzzle and dropping off the patch of coal I call a nose at the end, I open my eyes and look down towards the ground. The white t-shirt clings to my body, showing the white and gray fur that covers my skin underneath. My chest rises and falls with each breath drawn, but the chill that has overcome my being makes the action almost beyond my realm of consciousness.
With a limp hand, I close the door behind me until it is shut tight. The lock has been left open so that Rayne can easily take shelter within. Rolling my head around, I look towards the buzzing neon lights of the motel and wonder how far away she is and how horrible the fear and hurt that I have inflicted upon her must be. I swallow hard, nearly losing my tongue, and turn away.
In front of me the grass has been matted down by the weight of the water. Beyond that, that once gentle babbling brook has turned into a raging river, a tumultuous torrent threatening to tear away the bridge that spans it. The water, once clean and clear, is now brown with dirt and debris. It’s calm surface transformed into a shaking, disturbed conveyer belt.
On the other side of the creek, near the road and bridge, stands a long oak tree, its wide branches and deep emerald leaves shaking as the wind grabs at it. But its thicker branches and wide trunk stand resolute and still, defying the angry cries of the howling wind. Beyond it the growing corn whips around, shaken and broken with the elements and is threatened to be pulled away in some tornado.
With every breath drawn water rushes into my long mouth, but I mind it no more than the rocks underfoot. Slowly, nearly shaking with both chill and fear, I stumble forward. My eyes, wide open now as my muzzle, pin themselves upon the rocky sides of that bridge which seems to crumble under the might of nature. Crossing the dirt parking lot, I step off of the mud and let my paws clean off on the grass.
My arms swinging, I approach the stone side of the bridge and round it with a strong stride. The blacktop which cuts through the rolling land as a road is colder than metal to my skin, but nearly brought to warmth with the storm. The darkness leaves little to see and the only way that I know that I’m at the middle is with each strike of lightning in the distance and roll of the thunder, which makes the ground shake and tremor.
In the far off, the purple cracks the sky and sends out its veins into the black of the night, showing the densely packed clouds which fill the sky until the end of view in every direction. Within moments, the thunder follows and shakes the bridge beneath me. As I near the very center of the small overpass, I turn towards the side and step upwards with one paw.
Dropping my view downwards, I watch the water stream beneath me, the very noise it makes as it crashes against the banks, any moment ready to reach over them and grab whatever is nearby, strong enough to draw me forward. No longer do I feel the fear that I had but a half an hour ago. Now I feel a cold calm fill my body, but an angry heat remains in my heart.
With both paws I step up onto the wall keeping any vehicle safely on the road and stand up straight. Lightning pierces the sky once again and fills my ears which are folded nearly against my skull for protection. The white light shows to me my gallows appear before me, the pressed grass my audience and the whipping oak tree, my executioner. I roll my head back and look to the sky as darkness resumes.
“To be,” I yell towards the heavens, “Or not to be: That is question!”
Crackles of thunder fill my ears and a few small strings of lightning light the distance.
“What are you doing?” A voice fills my ears.
Looking downwards slowly, I see a blackness fill the top of the churning water below. He is there, staring up at me, his body extending from my feet, attached like a shadow. But there is something wrong with him, something that is more corrupt than it has been in the past. He is no longer a reflection of me, but a pure black shade staring at me from the blackest corner of the room.
His entire body, once filled with the same color that filled mine, is now pitched with ebony black. His eyes, once brown as mine, now glow a ghastly red, his hatred boils within him, the fire that stokes his furnace. His arms are ended with razor-sharp claws, his tail twisted as his heart. Before me now stands only the dragon which guards the treasure room, no longer a reflection of me.
“Whether ‘tis nobler in the mind to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune, or take arms against a sea of trouble and by opposing end them?” I resound, staring down at him.
“What the fuck do you think you’re doing Jack?” He screams up at me, his voice likened only to the shriek of a bat mixed with the low rumble of an idling engine. “Is this what you’ve come to, you fucking coward? But how could I expect you to succeed at this? You couldn’t even save your father, you let him die! Now you’ll let your mother suffer too!”
“To die, to sleep no more; and by a sleep to say we end the heartache, and the thousand natural shocks that flesh is heir to: ‘tis a consummation devoutly to be wished.”
He shakes about on the top of the raging torrent, his arms reaching forward as his body shakes. He knows he’s nearing the end, but he wishes to fight. With those blackened claws, he reaches forward and stabs into the rock face of the stone bridge and begins to crawl forward.
“Oh, Jack, I could stand here and watch you try, but God only knows you’d fuck this up too!” He screams before a mocking laugh resonates from his gut. “Watch little Jacky try to escape the pressures of the world, and fail! You’ve already failed everything else, you worthless piece of shit, now let’s watch you fail at killing yourself!”
“I’ve nothing left.” I say and lift my eyes towards the sky. “I’ve let my father walk off to certain death, I’ve tortured my mother for eighteen years, I’ve left my only other family to live under a torturous, hypnotic spell and the only person I’ve ever loved I’ve chased off because of my own stupidity. When the connections man has cease to be, so does the man cease to be.”
“You always were a worthless piece of shit, ever since I found you there wallowing in your own sorrow! I took you up from that pool and led you towards the road to success!” He cries out angrily. “But now I know I should have left you drown!”
“I have no future; I’ve already surrendered that to be the slave of some slovenly Serb in his mechanics shop. I could’ve been something, I could’ve been somebody. But instead I’ll forever be a nobody, which is what I am. Worst of all, I’ve taken the futures of two other people because of my own hatred.”
“That’s right Jack, do it!” He screams from below, clawing two steps closer to me. “I’ve been telling you end it for years, but you’ve never had the stones to do it! Now I’m watching you, ready to see you dive down into the River Styx and spend the rest of your pathetic existence clawing for the top of a rock, hoping Dante will save you!”
Lightning pierces the darkness and illuminates the storm-ravaged area and the thunder shakes the ground beneath me. My skin begins to sting with every drop of rain which pounds at my very being, drenching me to whatever soul I have left. Tears fill my eyes, stinging them and making my face convulse. Shaking, I turn my head towards the sky and stare upwards, rain drops threatening to blind me.
“You’ve taken everything!” I scream towards the heavens, towards Him. “You’ve taken my Dad, you’ve taken my Mom, and you’ve taken my hearth and home! You’ve taken all my friends and even the only woman who ever gave a fucking shit about me! You’ve been threatening to take my future, for you’ve already taken my past and my present! Now finish it, you fucking coward! You’ve forced me to take everything from myself, so make me do it! I am your puppet and you are my puppet master! Smite me, oh mighty smiter!”
“Yes, Jack, cry for him! Cry for all of those you could never save! Moreover, cry for yourself, for nothing shall save you now!” He hisses.
A bolt of lightning cracks the ground less than a mile out, threatening to strike me where I stand. It should be a fitting end. We all come into the world with a burst of energy, but only some of us go out in one. The light which fills the land with light casts dark shadows over everything, showing every twisted version of reality than any Manson could imagine. No Helter Skelter is needed to destroy us, for man strives to destroy himself.
“I have not walked through this world with the weight of a dead pawnbroker on my mind, nor the lives of over a dozen airmen killed over Pianosa, not even that of the freedom of a couple loonies in an Oregon asylum, but I know this is my end. If he has a conscious, he shall suffer for his mistake, it read! That will be his punishment, as well as his prison! Well this death row wait is over; it’s time for the chair! You can’t kill me anymore because I’m already dead!” I cry out towards the sky.
“Enough talk, finish it!” He screams from just below. “Or are you too much a coward to even do this?!”
My heart stings and convulses in my chest, my stomach wretches as if threatening to spew whatever it holds out onto the ground. My head shakes around and my skin has become numb. Rolling my head back towards the sky, I feel all the muscles in my body tighten up as taut as the rope.
Closing my eyes tighter than should be physically possible, I open my lips up and roll back my head as a deep rumbling howl emerges from within my body. The noise reaches above any noise creation could create and for but a few seconds, everything feel still. My tail has come out from beneath my legs and my heart and stomach have calmed down. The muscles which fill out my legs and arms have relaxed and I feel a general calm wave over my being.
Suddenly a bolt of lightning springs up from the oak tree near the edge of the creak and leaps towards the sky. The sound alone shakes my body, but does not end the call that I send out to any station wishing to pick it up. The bark of the tree blackens within an instant and the tree cracks in half, its leaves fluttering towards the ground like a wing of birds frightened into flight.
The heavy branches crash to the ground or are swept away in the river. The light which fills the area is blinding to say the least and the thunder is deafening. As the thunder rocks my chest and the lightning makes everything appear white, I feel something grab my one leg. I know it is him, making sure I don’t walk away from this.
My body falls like dead weight, my back slamming against the stone barrier on the way down. Only once I hit that bridge does that sorrowful howl cut off. Then I close my mouth and feel as the world disappears around me, my body feeling like a rag doll in a video game. As I pass through the darkness which he has created, I feel a thick warmth go through my very being.
As I open my eyes for just a moment on the way down, I watch as he dissipates into the darkness of the world. The black figure, which hovers just above the water, turns into nothing more than a thin mist and is gone. His disappearance is cleansing. I feel a cold sensation wash over me as I stay in the stasis of freefall. I know it is over.
My body strikes the surface of the water and quickly I am underwater. My breath, which has filled my lungs, is held as hard as concrete within the muscles of my chest. But despite being engulfed by this water, knowing it shall take me with it, I make no effort to fight. I know this is what is required, that this is what I must do. For the sake of everyone I’ve harmed, for the sake of every wrong I’ve done, I must end here.
The water holds me and begins to drag me down through it’s artery towards the nearest river. As I pass under the bridge, without ever seeing it, I can feel it go by high above. Sinking slowly to the bottom, my arms and legs slam into rocks, logs and other debris which makes my body spin like a top. But still I do not move. Instead I relax into the arms of the world and whoever has created it.
Water sloshes into my ears and quickly fills it and seeps into my eyes, nose and mouth. It yanks me back and forth like a small child does to a toy, bashing me into the banks, the bottom and every obstacle it holds. The pain is almost unbearable, yet I stay calm and wait.
My stomach has unclenched and somewhere above I begin to get the feeling that I have been absolved, that all the horrible things I have done no longer matter. The air in my chest begins to run out and I feel my consciousness begin to relax and fade away. A dark, sticky blackness begins to set in on me, slowly lowering down like a blanket engulfing a bed.
Rolling backwards, I let my eyes open once more for a peek at the world. A dark figure crashes into the water above and begins to sink as well. I close my eyes and relax more, water now beginning to seep into my lungs, telling me I will soon be leaving. As my mind collapses into unconsciousness, I feel something wrap around my body, beneath both of my arms. But I don’t care. Whatever I leave behind is free to be used by the world. For the only thing man really leaves behind is a name and a rotting corpse.