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A poem for my old friend Gallius whom we just call Gal. He's a very funny fellow, so I decided to make my poem funny too XP
Quote from his reaction: "Honestly my brutha, this is so dang awesome! It's actually hilarious how much it sounds like me hahaha. The poem is really cool. It weaves a brilliant story with brilliant wordplay. Thank you most kindly for this, Pua! I truly appreciate it."
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Don't forget to check my account for my stories I keep to tell!
Feel free to offer and request your own ideas, concepts for poems you'd want to see and read, use them for your own creativity and works!
Quote from his reaction: "Honestly my brutha, this is so dang awesome! It's actually hilarious how much it sounds like me hahaha. The poem is really cool. It weaves a brilliant story with brilliant wordplay. Thank you most kindly for this, Pua! I truly appreciate it."
___________
Don't forget to check my account for my stories I keep to tell!
Feel free to offer and request your own ideas, concepts for poems you'd want to see and read, use them for your own creativity and works!
Category Poetry / All
Species Unspecified / Any
Size 50 x 50px
File Size 914 B
I'm probably overthinking this but shadows only cause chills during the day, when the sunlight makes things warmer so it feels like the shade is cooler. So I think it would make more sense for the scene to happen during the day. Also "gal" is another way to say "girl", so it's weird to picture a man with that name. Not in a bad way, though, just peculiar. And the way some lines break is awkward. You shouldn't just follow a rhyme scheme, make sure the pauses sound natural.
Otherwise, it's alright. I like that the shadows act like cats while Gal is very cat-like himself, as if a big white cat is being bothered by smaller black cats. A nice picture.
Otherwise, it's alright. I like that the shadows act like cats while Gal is very cat-like himself, as if a big white cat is being bothered by smaller black cats. A nice picture.
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