a good idea methinks, but soo much text @.@

The next page will be less text heavy!

So.... many words... they've actually eaten the demon's head XD

Come on! This is a comic! Visual medium, here! You can convey ideas and emotions through facial expressions and action! Also, you seemed to have crammed.... so much plot into three pages, I don't know where you can go from here XD Pace yourself! Introduce us to the characters at a slower pace.

The best thing you can do is SHOW not tell in a comic :D SHOW him going to work, SHOW him interacting with people! Does he get along with coworkers? Is he just casually geeky or geeky to an extreme of some sort? What kind of roleplaying games does he play and what kind of character does he play? (this can be a convenient device for describing what kind of character he is :3 Is he a good-natured cleric or a backstabbing rogue under all those geeky layers?).

I like the idea of having a real life pair of consciences following this character around, but.... you've rushed too fast into the story without setting the scene! Slow down, wolfy :3

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Exposi.....ary_technique)
Look up Incluing near the bottom there :D that's what I'm talking about!

I'm officially dedicating page four to you. You will understand when I post it. *Smiles* In the mean time, yeah I agree I basically just used the first three pages to just dump all of the background information about the characters and basic story etc. It was mostly cause I don't want to deal with it again. If I were a decent writer I would have let the story develop at a slower much more natural pace. The big thing about this comic is my heart isn't in it. I'm really doing it solely because a friend forced me with the idea that drawing lots and lots of sequential art will help me grow as an artist. He's prolly right, and he is an awesome friend, so that is why I actually caved in and started this project. I came up with the story and characters pretty much an hour after I decided to do it, and I actually drew the first 3 pages without writing out what text I was going to put in them. Lol. (I call this the George Lucas method of storytelling) I will say this, despite how dialogue heavy it is, I actually liked the second page for the most part. Especially the GTA joke as retarded as it was. The first and third pages just look badly drawn to me. Like really bad. Like it hurts me to look at them bad. *Smiles* and yeah, the amount of text is absurd. Thank you for the honest criticism. I actually love getting feedback like this. Feel free to critique any future pages as well. *Smiles*

^^ anytime! Sometimes it's good to just.... write or draw for the sole purpose of practice, I understand.

I'd agree that this could have been stretched out to plenty more pages, and that would have solved the text placement problem. But in a way, having Charles literally try to "talk Marc out of the picture" IS an interesting use of the comic medium.

Oh joy, an angel...I can't stand angels with they're girly, angelic complexion, their wings and their self-righteousness.

Love Charles' shirt. :)

I do too! I love Mass Effect so much!

Can't wait for 3. Lets hope for an option to coax Garrus into a gay relationship with Shepard.

I like the demon best so far

Yeah so do I.

I agree that it's a bit wall-o-texty (Well, they're just sitting drinking coffee, so, not much else to show...), buuut, overall looks damned good, and can't wait to read more!

*grins naughtily* Angelic/demonic threesomes?

interesting so far, can't wait to see the rest!