Art by  Moonfin

(This is a bit of an experiment, having my sona Todd interacting with me. For sake of clarity I shall here be referring to myself as "ultra" in this. This won't be a running theme, but I may do a little interaction with one or two others at a later date.)

Todd Baker had a smile on his face again, feeling as though all was right in the world. But he knew that probably wouldn't last long. In his room, he turned to face the metaphorical fourth wall and said: "Okay, author... I know I'm not supposed to acknowledge you, or the fact I'm in a story but I have some grievances I need to air with you!"
Ultra: "Uh, what now? Didn't know you could see me, what's up?"
Todd: "Well, I'll get to old business in a minute. But for now, current events what horrible thing is going to happen to me and Darlene?"
Ultra: "What do you mean? Why do you think I'm going to have something awful happen?"
Todd: "Really? You have the audacity to ask that question? You only have awful things happen to me. And before you say: 'I've had good things happen to you.' you just rip away my joy as soon as I have any. First you have me mauled by Anya, I truly loved that girl dude. We were sweethearts for crying out loud! And you gave me a glass eye. Then you have me and Kichaa as a happy couple, we were getting along great and you brought that elephant in to ruin it. And until then we had a decently healthy relationship. Then she went whacko and threw me into the trash, TWICE! You had a man I considered to be like a second father murdered in front of my eyes. Poor Ivan didn't deserve that. You've had me hunted by paranormal entities, had my best friend taken away from me, and now she's back, what fresh Hell are you going to have her and I go through? Wait, let me guess: We're going to fall in love, get married, and then she's going to die in some horrible way leaving me alone in the world? Or is she going to try and kill me while she's sleep walking?"
Ultra: "But it was nice while you were with Anya right? Oh right those were in flash backs... And for Kichaa... yeah even I don't have a good excuse for doing that to you little guy."
Todd: "Need I even mention the lioness who fattened me up and ate me?"
Ultra: "In my defense, that lioness was just a nightmare sequence."
Todd: "Fair enough on that one, but what about the rest of the grief you've given me?"
Ultra: "Well for Kichaa, I mean you knew what you were getting into with a girl who's name means 'crazy'. I am truly sorry about Ivan though, he was done wrong. If I could change that I would, I liked the big guy too. For the paranormal hunting, I wanted to give you a bit of a thrill."
Todd: "A thrill?!??! And another thing while I have your attention, why the fluff is Alex a thing? Why does my brother want to kill me in anyway possible? Like that A-hole used Anya as a murder weapon for fluff's sake!"
Ultra: "Well you see I, uh... I'm not entirely responsible for his creation. He was needed for an rp with a friend, and just sort of evolved from there."
Todd: "And cute as Adlai may be, why do I need a bodyguard? I can bench-press a hippo, I think I can handle myself in a fight. And what's going to go wrong with her exactly?"
Ultra: "For Adlai, I originally needed a reason for a robot on the cast of characters, and figured you could use the company. As to what was going to happen, she was actually going to be a remote controlled puppet controlled by Alex and one of his workers to try and kill you."
Todd: "Is she still programmed to do that?"
Ultra: "No, I got talked out of it. But it doesn't remove the chance of her still getting hacked by Alex on a future date."
Todd: "Great... I noticed you avoided the Darlene question though."
Ultra: "......"
Todd: "That was exactly what you had in mind wasn't it!?"
Ultra: "No.... maybe... Well not anymore, I thought about it for a minute but decided that was too cruel for Darlene or you. Instead she'll likely just say she loves you like a little brother, rather than as a romantic interest."
Todd looked the author square in the eyes: "That's it! I'm done with you! I quit, get yourself a new punching bag!" He then grabbed my pen and wrote the words "The End!" On himself and vanished from sight.
Ultra: "Well, that was unexpected... Hey wait a minute!" As I then drew him back in front of me.

Todd: "Hey! I told you i quit!" Ultra: "Well I'm the writer here, how about if I make some compensations? Then will you stay?"
Todd tapped his foot on the ground: "I'm listening.."
Ultra: "Well how about I fix your eyes, and give you your balls back?"
Todd: "That's more like it, but there is one other thing."
Ultra: "What's that?"
Todd: "Even if you can't undo my physical scars from what happened with me and Anya, could you remove the mental scars she has?"
Ultra: "That I can do. She really is special to you after all that isn't she?"
Todd: "Of course she is, you never really get over your first love do you?"
Ultra: "I...I guess you don't buddy." I then patted his head and got to work, keeping my promises to him.
Todd: "Nothing bad is going to happen to Mom and Dad right?"
Ultra: "Todd, I'm not that cruel. Your parents will be perfectly fine. I promise you that. Now just go about your business buddy."