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This is the fourth book of "Stories from Chakona" serie set in the concepts and ideas created by 
Goldfur
The present story is titled "Ties of Life" and tells the continuation of previous three books. Drawing by
sethtriggs
I hope you enjoy it.
<<< PREV | FIRST | NEXT >>>
CHAPTER 11
In building 115, daily work continued as usual. Chakat Lorna watched hir monitor, reviewing the structure of the software under hir responsibility. A slight smile appeared on hir face when shi saw that everything was in order. Shi moved hir tail from side to side, satisfied, while hir eyes scanned every corner of the screen.
Suddenly, hir concentration was interrupted by the sound of the door opening. Hir chakat heart rejoiced as shi saw the slender figure of hir rakshani colleague enter.
“Gerak! Great to see you!” shi exclaimed, overflowing with joy.
“Grrr. Hi” the engineer responded coldly while he took his place.
“You missed work for several days, we didn't hear from you. And now you show up and just say hello? What happened to you? You have been sick?”
“No.”
"So you traveled outside of Amistad or Chakona?" Lorna insisted, coming to his side.
“Grrr… No”
“Hey! Did you know that Natany was here looking for you? Have you at least talked to her?”
At his colleague's insistence, Gerak turned to shi and declared:
“That's none of your business.”
Lorna, surprised by the response, left hir tail motionless while the hairs on hir back stood up.
“What? As you say?! Natany was very worried about you. She needs you. She is still sad and vulnerable over the loss of her colleague Tagle. At least tell me you called her PADD.”
“Grrr… I already told you, that's none of your business! Let me work in peace!” Exclaimed the rakshani, and then turned on his monitors.
“Grrr! You're an idiot, Gerak!” Lorna shouted furiously.
“And you are a nosy cat!” He answered and then turned towards his console.
“Grrr! You fool!” exclaimed the chakat, before leaving the room angrily.
Meanwhile, in the employee break area, Jhonny was chatting animatedly with one of his Chakat co-workers over coffee.
“And how long do you plan to continue working here, Jhonny?” asked the official with light brown fur and blue eyes.
“Only until my friend Esteban returns from his vacation.”
“Ah, so you replace Esteban. I see. And you are very friends?”
“Well yes. I met him in the Dewclaw graduate course”
“Prrrr… I also studied at Dewclaw, you know? In Berdovia. But I'm from New New York.”
“Really, Sulaver? I'm from Eucla City, heh heh.”
"Well, then we could say we're almost neighbors," the Chakat said with a chuckle.
“Yeah. Do you know Eucla City?” Johnny asked, excited.
“Sure! I've been there many times," Sulaver responded, as shi brought hir head closer to the human's and looked at him with hir deep blue eyes. At that moment, they were both startled when Lorna arrived unexpectedly at the place.
“Johnny!” exclaimed the chakat with a roar.
“Hey? Oh! Lorna! What's happening?” answered the engineer, worried.
“Grrr! Is Gerak! Appeared!”
“Uh? Did Gerak come back?”
“Yeah! And he is as unbearable as ever!”
“Oh I see. Lo… Lorna, I would like to introduce you to Chakat Sulaver. Someone I met yesterday while having lunch.”
“Hello. Nice to meet you!” said Sulaver friendly, wagging hir tail.
“Grrr, hello,” Lorna replied dryly, crossing hir arms. With hir empathetic sense, Sulaver clearly perceived Lorna's obfuscation, so shi discreetly decided to leave them alone.
“Uh, well, I have to get back to work. Nice to see you again, Jhonny. Tail high!”
“Goodbye, Sulaver,” Jhonny said. Lorna, who was still with hir arms crossed, shot an angry look at hir friend.
“Lorna, what's wrong?” Johnny asked.
The chakat, after sitting on hir hindquarters, declared:
“Be careful, Johnny.”
“With Sulaver? Why?”
“Shi was flirting with you!”
“Wait. Sulaver didn't flirt with me.”
“Grr! Humans! I don't know if you or the Rakshanis are worse! Shi was flirting with you. I am chakat and my sense of smell can detect pheromones in the distance.”
“Oh? Was Sulaver seriously flirting with me? Wow, I didn't think I could exert amorous attraction on such a cute chakat,” said Jhonny with an air of satisfaction. Lorna, holding hir head, declared:
“Do not be an idiot! Don't feel special. You know well that we Chakats are promiscuous by nature and we go after any prey that attracts us.”
“Oh, thank you for acknowledging my merits, Lorna.”
“Also, I take very good care of my friend Vera's interests. So as long as you work here, Jhonny, I won't let any chakat come near you with libidinous intentions, grrr”.
“Okay! Okay! Lorna, whatever you say. I have no intention of getting involved with anyone here and you know it.”
“It is not you who worries me, but the chakats of this place.”
"It's okay, Lorna," Jhonny said, taking hir hands to calm hym down a little. “Now, will you tell me what's going on with Gerak? It seems like you two had an argument.”
At that moment, Lorna could not contain herself and began to sob. Jhonny stood up and wrapped her in a comforting hug.
“Oh, come on, friend. Calm down. You know that rakshani better than me, and you know that he has a difficult character.”
“Johnny, tell me the truth. Do you think I am a chakat who unduly interferes in the lives of others?”
“Awww, Lorna. Of course not. The thing is that you have a very generous heart and you care a lot about others. You are our guardian lion. You always protect us. Esteban, Vera and I love you for that. And if Gerak doesn't know how to appreciate it, he's an idiot.
“Rockshie always tells me that. I'm a little beast. And shi loves that.”
“You see it? That's why Rockshie gave you hir heart. You are now hir guardian.”
“Oh, Jhonny, friend, thanks for that. I love you very much. Human wisdom…” said Lorna, hugging him.
“Hmmm, to be honest, I think that about giving your heart... I heard it from Esteban, heh.”
“¿Uh?”
In Amistad Prison, Brend the Renzar was resting after exercising his body and maintaining his good shape. For some time now, he had intended to regain his strength as a Khudok fighter and keep his mind from evil thoughts. This time, free of stimulant chemicals, Brend had achieved an enviable figure, well toned and strong. It was the fruit of the mixture of two races, Ulkarian and desert, bringing together the best physical qualities of both.
He lay down on the soft mat of his cell and breathed deeply. He looked at the ceiling and closed his eyes, submerging himself in his thoughts, trying to relax, just as the prison therapist had taught him.
It was not easy for a Renzar like him, always active and prepared to fight, to calm the stormy waters of the mind.
"So now you want my help?" After what you told me last time? You called me human scum, remember? Why should I and my family help you?” He suddenly heard a voice.
“Is that you, Esteban? When you came? I did not realize…”
“That time you tricked me by pretending to be my friend. And then you beat me mercilessly. If it wasn't for me getting help, you would have killed me.”
“Eh? I was crazy. Those substances I consumed… I shouldn't have done it…” Brend responded, agitated.
“And now you ask me for help? Do you think you deserve it?”
“Human, I…”
“What do I get by helping you? Tell me, what do you give me in return, Brend?”
“I... I have nothing to offer you.”
"Exactly! That's why I thought about it carefully. And you don't deserve my help. You are the worst of the renzar species, a shame to your brothers in Chakona. For Grom, I hope you rot in this prison. It is the only way to pay for all the damage you caused to me, my family and the Renzar community. Did you hear it, Mr. Brend?
"Wait, I..." the renzar said in an agitated tone.
"Mr. Brend?"
“No, wait... Esteban, Please!”
"Mr. Brend, Mr. Brend! Is he asleep? Mom, it seems like he's asleep," Cashir's childish voice suddenly sounded as shi held hir little hand on the bars of the fence.
“Don't bother him, son. We'd better come back another time," declared hir mother, social worker Chakat Sunbeam, who had gone to visit him.
“Oh that's a pity. I wanted to show him my friends' new collectible cards," said the little chakat, lowering hir ears and tail.
“Sunbeam! Wait! No... Don't go... I'm already awake," Brend said suddenly, standing up and approaching the fence.
“Mr. Brend! Wow! You look so strong! Hahaha.” Cashir exclaimed happily when shi saw Brend without the top part of his shirt.
“I notice you're a little agitated Brend. What's wrong?” Chakat Sunbeam asked, approaching him.
“I'm fine. Just… I was… Dreaming.”
“Hmmm. I bring you news. I was going to come tomorrow, but Cashir was eager to show you hir new Khudok trading cards.”
“I see. And what news do you have for me Sunbeam?”
“They informed me that Esteban Sivem agreed to talk to you. He will do it tomorrow.”
Brend turned pale and after sighing deeply, he replied.
“And do you know what his intentions are?”
“I have no idea Brend. I'm sorry. I have already made the corresponding reports. Now everything is in the hands of the judge.”
“Grrr… It's okay. I guess I'll have to spend a few more years here.” He said as he bent down to caress Cashir's little head. The chakat boy started purring and wagging hir tail in happiness.
“Mr. Brend, I have these new cards to show you. Look!” Shi exclaimed excitedly as shi handed them to him through the bars. The great renzar observed them one by one. Some of the fighters who were there were known to him.
“And I have this one. Its is one of my favorites!” added the little boy, giving him a card where Brend appeared in a winning pose. Cashir's little eyes shone with excitement when shi saw hir sports idol so close to hym. Faint tears appeared in Brend's eyes as he took it in his hands. The little chakat noticed it and stretched out hir little hand to comfort him. The proud renzar moved away from hym a little, and then declared:
“Eh... Look... I'll tell you what we'll do Cashir. I'll do the poses of each of the fighters on the cards for you, is that okay?”
“Yeah! Yeah! Mr. Brend!” The boy responded excitedly.
“Perfect! Well, I don't have my official loincloth. I hope you do not mind.”
"Oh no Mr. Brend. It will be great anyway, heh heh heh" said the boy enthusiastically.
Brend arranged the cards on the mat and began to emulate the poses of each of the fighters with his body. While he did so, he told the chakats the name of each one of them in the Marlock language. Cashir and Sunbeam were amazed by the spectacle. Although Sunbeam was not a fan of Khudok, shi still enjoyed this sport thanks to Cashir, whom shi always used to take to the sports arena, more than even to the chakker. At that moment, the social worker was happy to see that Brend's mood seemed to improve week to week, thanks to the presence of hir young son.
GoldfurThe present story is titled "Ties of Life" and tells the continuation of previous three books. Drawing by
sethtriggsI hope you enjoy it.
<<< PREV | FIRST | NEXT >>>
CHAPTER 11
In building 115, daily work continued as usual. Chakat Lorna watched hir monitor, reviewing the structure of the software under hir responsibility. A slight smile appeared on hir face when shi saw that everything was in order. Shi moved hir tail from side to side, satisfied, while hir eyes scanned every corner of the screen.
Suddenly, hir concentration was interrupted by the sound of the door opening. Hir chakat heart rejoiced as shi saw the slender figure of hir rakshani colleague enter.
“Gerak! Great to see you!” shi exclaimed, overflowing with joy.
“Grrr. Hi” the engineer responded coldly while he took his place.
“You missed work for several days, we didn't hear from you. And now you show up and just say hello? What happened to you? You have been sick?”
“No.”
"So you traveled outside of Amistad or Chakona?" Lorna insisted, coming to his side.
“Grrr… No”
“Hey! Did you know that Natany was here looking for you? Have you at least talked to her?”
At his colleague's insistence, Gerak turned to shi and declared:
“That's none of your business.”
Lorna, surprised by the response, left hir tail motionless while the hairs on hir back stood up.
“What? As you say?! Natany was very worried about you. She needs you. She is still sad and vulnerable over the loss of her colleague Tagle. At least tell me you called her PADD.”
“Grrr… I already told you, that's none of your business! Let me work in peace!” Exclaimed the rakshani, and then turned on his monitors.
“Grrr! You're an idiot, Gerak!” Lorna shouted furiously.
“And you are a nosy cat!” He answered and then turned towards his console.
“Grrr! You fool!” exclaimed the chakat, before leaving the room angrily.
*** Meanwhile, in the employee break area, Jhonny was chatting animatedly with one of his Chakat co-workers over coffee.
“And how long do you plan to continue working here, Jhonny?” asked the official with light brown fur and blue eyes.
“Only until my friend Esteban returns from his vacation.”
“Ah, so you replace Esteban. I see. And you are very friends?”
“Well yes. I met him in the Dewclaw graduate course”
“Prrrr… I also studied at Dewclaw, you know? In Berdovia. But I'm from New New York.”
“Really, Sulaver? I'm from Eucla City, heh heh.”
"Well, then we could say we're almost neighbors," the Chakat said with a chuckle.
“Yeah. Do you know Eucla City?” Johnny asked, excited.
“Sure! I've been there many times," Sulaver responded, as shi brought hir head closer to the human's and looked at him with hir deep blue eyes. At that moment, they were both startled when Lorna arrived unexpectedly at the place.
“Johnny!” exclaimed the chakat with a roar.
“Hey? Oh! Lorna! What's happening?” answered the engineer, worried.
“Grrr! Is Gerak! Appeared!”
“Uh? Did Gerak come back?”
“Yeah! And he is as unbearable as ever!”
“Oh I see. Lo… Lorna, I would like to introduce you to Chakat Sulaver. Someone I met yesterday while having lunch.”
“Hello. Nice to meet you!” said Sulaver friendly, wagging hir tail.
“Grrr, hello,” Lorna replied dryly, crossing hir arms. With hir empathetic sense, Sulaver clearly perceived Lorna's obfuscation, so shi discreetly decided to leave them alone.
“Uh, well, I have to get back to work. Nice to see you again, Jhonny. Tail high!”
“Goodbye, Sulaver,” Jhonny said. Lorna, who was still with hir arms crossed, shot an angry look at hir friend.
“Lorna, what's wrong?” Johnny asked.
The chakat, after sitting on hir hindquarters, declared:
“Be careful, Johnny.”
“With Sulaver? Why?”
“Shi was flirting with you!”
“Wait. Sulaver didn't flirt with me.”
“Grr! Humans! I don't know if you or the Rakshanis are worse! Shi was flirting with you. I am chakat and my sense of smell can detect pheromones in the distance.”
“Oh? Was Sulaver seriously flirting with me? Wow, I didn't think I could exert amorous attraction on such a cute chakat,” said Jhonny with an air of satisfaction. Lorna, holding hir head, declared:
“Do not be an idiot! Don't feel special. You know well that we Chakats are promiscuous by nature and we go after any prey that attracts us.”
“Oh, thank you for acknowledging my merits, Lorna.”
“Also, I take very good care of my friend Vera's interests. So as long as you work here, Jhonny, I won't let any chakat come near you with libidinous intentions, grrr”.
“Okay! Okay! Lorna, whatever you say. I have no intention of getting involved with anyone here and you know it.”
“It is not you who worries me, but the chakats of this place.”
"It's okay, Lorna," Jhonny said, taking hir hands to calm hym down a little. “Now, will you tell me what's going on with Gerak? It seems like you two had an argument.”
At that moment, Lorna could not contain herself and began to sob. Jhonny stood up and wrapped her in a comforting hug.
“Oh, come on, friend. Calm down. You know that rakshani better than me, and you know that he has a difficult character.”
“Johnny, tell me the truth. Do you think I am a chakat who unduly interferes in the lives of others?”
“Awww, Lorna. Of course not. The thing is that you have a very generous heart and you care a lot about others. You are our guardian lion. You always protect us. Esteban, Vera and I love you for that. And if Gerak doesn't know how to appreciate it, he's an idiot.
“Rockshie always tells me that. I'm a little beast. And shi loves that.”
“You see it? That's why Rockshie gave you hir heart. You are now hir guardian.”
“Oh, Jhonny, friend, thanks for that. I love you very much. Human wisdom…” said Lorna, hugging him.
“Hmmm, to be honest, I think that about giving your heart... I heard it from Esteban, heh.”
“¿Uh?”
***In Amistad Prison, Brend the Renzar was resting after exercising his body and maintaining his good shape. For some time now, he had intended to regain his strength as a Khudok fighter and keep his mind from evil thoughts. This time, free of stimulant chemicals, Brend had achieved an enviable figure, well toned and strong. It was the fruit of the mixture of two races, Ulkarian and desert, bringing together the best physical qualities of both.
He lay down on the soft mat of his cell and breathed deeply. He looked at the ceiling and closed his eyes, submerging himself in his thoughts, trying to relax, just as the prison therapist had taught him.
It was not easy for a Renzar like him, always active and prepared to fight, to calm the stormy waters of the mind.
"So now you want my help?" After what you told me last time? You called me human scum, remember? Why should I and my family help you?” He suddenly heard a voice.
“Is that you, Esteban? When you came? I did not realize…”
“That time you tricked me by pretending to be my friend. And then you beat me mercilessly. If it wasn't for me getting help, you would have killed me.”
“Eh? I was crazy. Those substances I consumed… I shouldn't have done it…” Brend responded, agitated.
“And now you ask me for help? Do you think you deserve it?”
“Human, I…”
“What do I get by helping you? Tell me, what do you give me in return, Brend?”
“I... I have nothing to offer you.”
"Exactly! That's why I thought about it carefully. And you don't deserve my help. You are the worst of the renzar species, a shame to your brothers in Chakona. For Grom, I hope you rot in this prison. It is the only way to pay for all the damage you caused to me, my family and the Renzar community. Did you hear it, Mr. Brend?
"Wait, I..." the renzar said in an agitated tone.
"Mr. Brend?"
“No, wait... Esteban, Please!”
"Mr. Brend, Mr. Brend! Is he asleep? Mom, it seems like he's asleep," Cashir's childish voice suddenly sounded as shi held hir little hand on the bars of the fence.
“Don't bother him, son. We'd better come back another time," declared hir mother, social worker Chakat Sunbeam, who had gone to visit him.
“Oh that's a pity. I wanted to show him my friends' new collectible cards," said the little chakat, lowering hir ears and tail.
“Sunbeam! Wait! No... Don't go... I'm already awake," Brend said suddenly, standing up and approaching the fence.
“Mr. Brend! Wow! You look so strong! Hahaha.” Cashir exclaimed happily when shi saw Brend without the top part of his shirt.
“I notice you're a little agitated Brend. What's wrong?” Chakat Sunbeam asked, approaching him.
“I'm fine. Just… I was… Dreaming.”
“Hmmm. I bring you news. I was going to come tomorrow, but Cashir was eager to show you hir new Khudok trading cards.”
“I see. And what news do you have for me Sunbeam?”
“They informed me that Esteban Sivem agreed to talk to you. He will do it tomorrow.”
Brend turned pale and after sighing deeply, he replied.
“And do you know what his intentions are?”
“I have no idea Brend. I'm sorry. I have already made the corresponding reports. Now everything is in the hands of the judge.”
“Grrr… It's okay. I guess I'll have to spend a few more years here.” He said as he bent down to caress Cashir's little head. The chakat boy started purring and wagging hir tail in happiness.
“Mr. Brend, I have these new cards to show you. Look!” Shi exclaimed excitedly as shi handed them to him through the bars. The great renzar observed them one by one. Some of the fighters who were there were known to him.
“And I have this one. Its is one of my favorites!” added the little boy, giving him a card where Brend appeared in a winning pose. Cashir's little eyes shone with excitement when shi saw hir sports idol so close to hym. Faint tears appeared in Brend's eyes as he took it in his hands. The little chakat noticed it and stretched out hir little hand to comfort him. The proud renzar moved away from hym a little, and then declared:
“Eh... Look... I'll tell you what we'll do Cashir. I'll do the poses of each of the fighters on the cards for you, is that okay?”
“Yeah! Yeah! Mr. Brend!” The boy responded excitedly.
“Perfect! Well, I don't have my official loincloth. I hope you do not mind.”
"Oh no Mr. Brend. It will be great anyway, heh heh heh" said the boy enthusiastically.
Brend arranged the cards on the mat and began to emulate the poses of each of the fighters with his body. While he did so, he told the chakats the name of each one of them in the Marlock language. Cashir and Sunbeam were amazed by the spectacle. Although Sunbeam was not a fan of Khudok, shi still enjoyed this sport thanks to Cashir, whom shi always used to take to the sports arena, more than even to the chakker. At that moment, the social worker was happy to see that Brend's mood seemed to improve week to week, thanks to the presence of hir young son.
Category Story / All
Species Unspecified / Any
Size 600 x 957px
File Size 324.1 kB
Listed in Folders
Oh thank you very much! Since I took the literature workshop a few months ago, I have put into practice different writing techniques. One of them is the dream image. I already did it before with Esteban, and also with Ugkar.
Another technique I have used is flashback, like you did. And in this chapter in particular, I gave a lot of importance to the dialogues. I am working to make better dialogues so that the reader knows the thoughts and emotions of the characters through them.
Another technique I have used is flashback, like you did. And in this chapter in particular, I gave a lot of importance to the dialogues. I am working to make better dialogues so that the reader knows the thoughts and emotions of the characters through them.
No problem at all, this dream image technique is full of potentials, for one, you can show the inner side of a character, something they probably would never show to others, like Brend showing shame, deep down, he feels like a disgrace to his Renzar brothers. Also! An experience from a dream can affect us in real life, promoting us to say words or do things that we usually wouldn’t, like Brend seeking comfort from the presence of little Cashir, and asking hir mother if shi knows Esteban’s intention of coming…that’s a sign Brend showing anxiety over the meeting. All in all, I’m gonna borrow this technique in the future! Again, thanks for the chapter!
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