On my latest poll you voted for which cosmic monster my persona Captain Frying Pan should face off against and the Cosmic Wendigo got the most votes so here it is the Captain Frying Pan VS The Cosmic Wendigo.


(Story)


Narrator: Our story begins on a distant planet called Planet Nobella a medieval theme alien world where galactic knights are trained with the latest in technology from solar swords, plasma shields, nova armors...actually it's more like a Renaissance Fair meet's Tomorrowland.

But however the planet's ruler and defender Sir Nobelstar one of the galaxy's most powerful hero is up against a creature more powerful than him as he is facing off against one of Terron's most evil of monsters the Cosmic Wendigo.


The alien knight king unleashed his laser sword and slashes at the monstrous creature as the Cosmic Wendigo uses it's powers to summon a powerful gusts of wind forcing Sir Nobelstar back, the brave knight desperately tries to cut into the monster's skin but it was too armored despite it looking like a corpse. The monster grabbed the knight and slams him down on the ground. Then with a roar the monster took one of it's sharp frills from it's body and it became a mini version of the cosmic wendigo, one by one it created more clones and on it's body it regrew new frills. The wendigo clones held down and attacked the brave knight as Terron with his space witch Cosminnie looked upon the onslaught as he held Sir Nobelstar's son Prince Nobility hostage as the Wendigo clones crumbles into dust after their attack; Terron approaches to the fallen Sir Nobelstar with a sinister grin on his evil face.


Terron: So Sir Noblestar; you have fought and lost to my cosmic monster and you know the agreement. If you failed to defeat my monster your planet shall surrender to me, if you refuse then I destroy it along with your son.


Prince Nobility: DAD! DON'T GIVE UP! PLEASE DON'T LET HIM WIN!


Sir Nobelstar: I have my people and you to care for my son. Please let my son go and the planet is yours. I...I give you my word.


Terron: Good! Now your planet and its people including you belongs to me. As for your son a deal is a deal. Wendigo here is your reward!


Prince Nobility: DAAAAAAAAD!


Sir Nobelstar: NOOOOOOOO!


Terron tossed the young prince to the monster, the Cosmic Wendigo grabbed the prince and open's it's skull like mouth to reveal a long snake like tongue that latched itself onto the boy's skull, and then it started draining the boy's life energy leaving behind an empty husk of the once young prince.


Sir Nobelstar: NO! You...you said you would let him go.


Terron: And I did. But I didn't say he would be alive.


Back on Terron's space fortress; after his victory he opens a portal to Earth for the Cosmic Wendigo.


Terron: You are far my most powerful Cosmic Monster; you can easily get the cosmic gem from that fat blue blob Captain Frying Pan. Destroy him and bring me back the cosmic gem when you do, the earth will be your buffet. Now go and be victorious.


After he sends in the cosmic Wendigo; Cosminnie approaches him with concerns.


Cosminnie: Um...m-master I've been wondering if you can open a portal to earth with your dark gems...why don't we go to Earth and get the cosmic gem?


Terron look at her with a cold stare and slaps her across her face.


Terron: Because I have many other planets to conquer before earth you stupid worthless witch and don't ever ask about my actions again. Just remember I took you in when you were just a weakling space witch, you were nothing and you are still nothing. I only kept you around so I have something to take my frustrations out on. After I get the cosmic gem and combine it with my dark gems I will have the power to redo the universe where I will be the only survivor and no one else will hurt me again just like my toxic family.


Cosminnie: Um...but...surely you wouldn't destroy me right? * Gets slapped again* UGH!


Terron: I told you not to bother me with your worthless questions. I'll destroy you when I feel like it. Now leave me you useless one-eyed creatin.


Cosminnie left Terron crying into the dungeons where Queen Purity was held hostage.


Queen Purity: He doesn't love you, you know. You do realize you have the power to leave him right?


Cosminnie: But...if I leave what will happen to you?


Queen Purity: I can handle him. He can't break the hopefulness of me and my people. I have faith that the cosmic gem picked Captain Frying Pan because I know he is the warrior that can defeat Terron no matter what.


Narrator: Meanwhile back on Earth we find our hero Captain Frying Pan with his friend Dr. Hanan Zezeeya both traveling in his food truck to the Big Green National Forest Park where a concert event to help raise funds to restore the trees lost to forest fires over the past summers.


Captain Frying Pan: Big Green National Forest Park. It was sure nice of them to hired me as one of the food truckers to help serve food at the event.


Dr. Hanan: I'm glad I got to help volunteer for medical assistance also I loved your frybread it's so tasty. Where did you learn to make frybread?


Captain Frying Pan: Back when my family and I used to live in Montana, we once lived on a Blackfeet Reservation in fact I'm one-third Blackfeet in my blood so it makes me a member. Living on a reservation I learn how to make frybread and of course make Indian Taco's or more political name Navajo Taco.


Dr. Hanan: I had no idea. It does explain some dream catchers and those cute Native American pattern blankets.


They arrived at the park where Captain Frying Pan sets up his food truck while Dr. Hanan attends to the medical tent. Up on stage the MC Chief George Running Bear a Navajo Chief and owner of the park came up to the stand to make a speech.


Chief George: Welcome all whom help with our fundraising to create funds to help plant more trees to replenish our forests that has suffered from forest fires in the past summers. I hope with great faith that we will raise not only new trees but more awareness to natures delicate ecosystems so that future generations can still have a forest to visit. Now before we can start I want to share a legend of the Brave one and the Wendigo a story that my family been sharing for many generations.


Dr. Hanan: What's a Wendigo?


Captain Frying Pan: It's a Native American legendary monster. It's been told by many Native Americans even to my folks on the Blackfeet Res. It's like Bambi but on crack.


Chief George: A long time ago our ancestors were happy and content; lives simple but respectful to nature. It seems that nothing would go wrong, but one day a dark cloud an evil spirit came and attacked our people, a creature of pure darkness and evil a Wendigo with the dark desire to eat our flesh, powers to control the elements and can even make more wendigo's. It rampage until a lone Brave Warrior came and face off against the creature at first the Wendigo seem to be victorious but the Brave had three things that the evil creature did not had. If he had faith in the great spirit he would have the power of a bear, if he had courage, true courage he would have the wolf's cunning and agility, if he is pure of heart he would have the spirit of the eagle. With the spirits help he has fought and defeated the evil monster and since then our people and the forest has never again saw the wicked Wendigo and now I have told this tale I hope you all take part that no matter how dark or how doubtful things maybe always have faith, courage and be pure of heart and you can overcome anything.


Captain Frying Pan: Like one day I'll be able to fit in my old high school jeans? Those accursed one-size-fits-all tags they're liars, LIARS I TELLS YA!


Suddenly an evil shadow loomed over Captain Frying Pan and Dr. Hanan, it was casted by the Cosmic Wendigo as the creature looms over the Captain and Dr. Hanan; the people saw the Wendigo and all were too frighten and frozen with fear to warn the Captain and his friend.


Captain Frying Pan: Boy this place sure got quiet all of a sudden.


Cosmic Wendigo: * Gives a low growl*


Captain Frying Pan: Hey Doc you better go to a doctor your throat sounds terrible.


Dr. Hanan: * Notices the Cosmic Wendigo* Um...Percy that wasn't me. It was...HIM!


He looks up at the Cosmic Wendigo as the creature gives out a roar at his face.


Captain Frying Pan: Oh it's another one of Terron's Cosmic Monsters now that makes more sense I...YIKES! * Picks up Dr. Hanan* FEET DON'T FAIL ME NOW!


He carries Dr. Hanan and at blinding speed he also picked up everyone at the concert stadium and brought everyone out of harms way in a safe distant in an open field.


Captain Frying Pan: * Panting hard* Now...to...face...that...b-beast...wow! Oh man I think I pulled a hamstring.


Chief George: The fable Wendigo it has come back to seek revenge on us.


Captain Frying Pan: Uh...yeah totally, it came seeking revenge and defiantly not sent by an evil space warlord hellbent on destroying me for my cosmic gem whatsoever!


Dr. Hanan: Percy you can't face that thing alone.


Captain Frying Pan: I got to Doc for I am Captain Frying Pan! Faster than a speedy 30-minutes-or-less pizza delivery service! Stronger than a 8 month old fruit cake from last Christmas! Able to shut-down 9 all-you-can-eat buffet restaurant's after lunch!


Dr. Hanan: That last one is true it's how he closed down the Golden Corral Restaurant back home.


Captain Frying Pan: I fight for truth, justice, and the fried fast-food way of life. TRA-LA-LA! Now I'm off!


All: HE CAN SAY THAT AGAIN!


Captain Frying Pan flies upward into the air and heads towards the Wendigo!


Captain Frying Pan: Now face my wraith you fiend!


Dr. Hanan: CAPTAIN!


Captain Frying Pan: Yes?


All: WATCH OUT FOR THAT TREE!


Captain Frying Pan: What tree? * Crashes into a tree* Oh...that tree!


All: OOOOH!


He resumes his flying and lands back to the Wendigo.


Captain Frying Pan: Okay Bambi time to mount your head to my wall! EAT PAN YOU WALKING ELK CORPSE! HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA!


He starts banging his frying pan on the monsters leg over and over again.


Captain Frying Pan: I THINK I'M WINNING! * Gets punched in the face by the monster* Or...I could be wrong! Uh-oh!


He avoids another hit as he rolls away like a blue ball. Then he quickly got up and starts hitting the monster over and over again with his frying pan.


Captain Frying Pan: * Breathing hard* Okay...mindless beating is not working on this thing. New plan...as soon as I think up of one.


Cosmic Wendigo: ROAR!


Captain Frying Pan: Don't you roar at me Starbucks I got you outnumbered one-to-one!


The Cosmic Wendigo pulls off some of it's sharp frills and once again created a small clone versions of itself as the mini-wendigo's surrounds Captain Frying Pan.


Captain Frying Pan: * Nervous chuckles* Nice wendigo's, good wendigo's, you don't want to eat me! I'm too fat and full of high blood sugar that would put you guys in a diabetic coma trust me I'm a heart attack waiting to happen.


They all jump upon him but he avoided the mini-wendigo's in time. They soon gave him chase through the stadium and through the food truck stands, he goes to one dressing room for the musicians as one of the mini-wendigo's follows him. It open the door to find Captain Frying Pan dressed in a man's bathrobe holding a newspaper and cup of coffee.


Captain Frying Pan: And where have you been little mister?


Mini-wendigo: Uh...huh?


Captain Frying Pan: Don't play innocent with me young man your mother and I have been worried sick wondering what was taking you so long to come home before curfew. Shame on you, you're ground.


Mini-wendigo: Uh...but.


Captain Frying Pan: Don't but me no but's mister go straight to your room and think about what you've done.


Mini-Wendigo: Oh...grezik-natick-goobish-nada! (Translation: Oh...I never get to have any fun)


The Mini-Wendigo went inside the trailer, the Captain jumps out and barricades the door with boards. Then he lifts up the trailer and tosses it at the other mini-wendigo's creating a small explosion that destroyed the clones.


Captain Frying Pan: Whoa! Must've been a delicate gas tank on that trailer. Once again I saved the day but I can't help thinking I'm forgetting something!


He looks up at the Cosmic Wendigo over him.


Captain Frying Pan: Oh...right I forgot about him!


The monster created a huge wind storm that literally blew Captain Frying Pan across the food truck. He sees his own food truck tipped over.


Captain Frying Pan: ARGH! MY BABY! That does it! You can beat me down, you can make fun of my weight, you can even say I'm ugly to my face BUT NO ONE! NO ONE MESSES WITH MY FOOD TRUCK!


He looks to one of the food trucks and finds a frozen yogurt food truck and pulls out a frozen yogurt dispenser.


Captain Frying Pan: EAT FROZEN DAIRY PRODUCT YOU POOR EXCUSE OF A CUTE FOREST CRITTER!


He fires the frozen yogurt dispenser to the monsters mouth. It swallows it whole and was about to attack but then it clutches it's head and roars in pain.


Captain Frying Pan: Brain freeze! Gets them every time! Now then how to beat that thing. I need an...


As the creature trashes around one of it's claws snapped a point from it's antlers and it shrank a little.


Captain Frying Pan: Did that thing just got smaller? Hmm...that's it! But I need to recharge a bit. HEY BAMBI! BET YOU DON'T HAVE THE GUTS TO TOSS ONE OF YOUR SHARP FRILLS AT ME!


The Cosmic Wendigo tosses one of it's frills at him but he uses his magic frying pan to catch the frill and turns it into a Navajo Taco and eats it. Giving him new energy. Not knowing that Dr. Hanan and Chief George Running Bear came around to check on the Captain as he charges to the monster and lifts it up with one hand with his new-found energy.


Chief George: He is the brave he has faith in the great spirit has the strength of the bear.


Then the monster unleashes it's snake tongue to drain Captain Frying Pan but he grabs the tongue as it shrieks in pain.


Captain Frying Pan: UGH! You're so slimy and gooey and icky! YUCK!


He then uses the tongue to wrapped around the monsters jaws and tied it in a knot and leaps on the arms and heads towards the top of it's head.


Chief George: He has courage, true courage he has the cunning and agility of a wolf!


Then he leaps high in the sky and readies his frying pan for a major blow.


Chief George: His heart is truly pure for he shows that he has the spirit of the eagle!


Captain Frying Pan: CAPTAIN FRYING PAN SLAMMA-RAMMA-PANMMA!


He drops upon the monsters head at super sonic speed and slams the pan on the creatures head snapping both of it's antlers off and they all crumbled to dust as they land on the ground. The monster slowly got back up from the blow and ready's to attack but this time it notices that something is different. Captain Frying Pan is looking down at him like a mighty giant. The monster realizes that after the Captain snapped it's antlers off the monster has shrunk down to 6-inches tall.


Cosmic Wendigo: * small voice* Uh-oh! Eh...heh-heh-heh!


The tiny creature tries to run but was grabbed by Captain Frying Pan. Then the Captain dropped and kicked the monster like a football sending it high into the sky and back into the atmospheres of space.


Seconds later at Terron's space fortress, Terron sees an image of the tiny cosmic wendigo as it crashes into the fortress, the tiny wendigo yelps like a small puppy and races past it's monster and sneaks into a space mouses hole in a wall, kicking out the space mouth, puts up a sign that says "I QUIT!" and shutting the door. The space mouse pulls out a can and pours out it's content.


Space mouse: * tiny voice* I quit too! This energy drink really messes up your head!


Terron: That...was...my...cosmic...wendigo? ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGH! I WILL KILL THAT CAPTAIN FRYING PAN! I HATE HIM SO MUCH! I DO! I DO! I DOOOOOOOOO!!


Back on Earth Captain Frying Pan uses his super speed to clean up the mess around the concert stadium and to replace the musicians trailer and the frozen yogurts dispenser.


Captain Frying Pan: Once again the weenies of evil has been turned into chili dogs of justice!


Dr. Hanan: You were so brave! You've really save the day. You know you have doubts about yourself but I think you're really the right choice for the cosmic gem to pick you as it's wieldier.


Chief George: Captain Frying Pan! You really do carry the heart and soul of a true brave warrior within you.


Captain Frying Pan: Thanks you for saying so but there is only one problem with that Chief.


Chief George: What is that?


Captain Frying Pan: The brave warrior in me is hidden in by years of nachos and sugary cola drinks.


The End.


Characters, artwork and story by me.