Ya know, I used to be very much like that. I also had a really hard time saying anything in a group setting, and like you I was so worried that what I might say would just be dumb, or off-putting. Felt way worse when I was sitting with a group of people at a chub/chaser event because of snarky people. But eventually I learned that if I say something stupid, who cares? So I started chiming in whenever I wanted to say something, and eventually I found myself wanting to speak up. And yeah, I still say something that's dumb, or that doesn't really bring me the laughter I was hoping for, but I love when I nail that one thing that just makes people laugh. Makes it all worth it. I wouldn't be there if I didn't get tired of being the quiet one in a group.

I know that's just a personal experience and may not work for everyone, but I figured I'd share so you know you're not alone. *hugs*

I get what you're going through too, and you're not alone this. If you want I can share my thoughts with you if you'd like?

🥺

you are not a coward for worrying about how things might sound once said out loud that is a fear i think everyone has gone through at some point in their lives....the world is scary and confusing right now even more so than it was just a few years ago and even though i can not claim to know exactly what your experience is like i can say that i am autistic and i know what feeling trapped is like and i know what its like to be unsure about expressing certain things and i have had moments where pent up emotions have boiled over in various different ways.....but i guess what i'm mainly trying to say is its okay to feel unhappy even if you are unsure how to convey it and sometimes its good to just talk about it to the best of your abilities and get at least some of it out (but you are most definitely not a coward you are human)

With this you are doing just the opposite. This is a sign of bravery, not everyone can speak about their feelings so honestly.
I have send you a PM.

I’ve enjoyed the few conversations we’ve had and am always around if you need to talk. But it’s ok and sometimes knowing you don’t know is a good place to start. You’re a good person from what I’ve seen. ^_^

I completely understand. To be honest, I feel the exact same way. You aren't alone.

Ever since I lost most of my friends at once for something stupid I did in September 2023, I have tried to keep my mouth shut, but I'm naturally a very talkative person online, so it always ends up backfiring because I feel like I have to say something or chime in. It got to the point where I was too afraid to do things, which is why I end up feeling somewhat lonely most of the time.

Its okay, bud. Just think of what you want to say, take your time, and say it. My door's always open if you need to talk and unload. You can also reach my Telegram and search my name "Lappy Bluepaws". Get well soon, my guy.

Just posting this is a big step and one that, through your vulnerability, allows others to hear you and hold a safe space for you to express how you feel these difficult things. Every time you choose to share how you feel helps build some courage, and creates deeper connections. The kind responses like these here you receive are good indicators of people you can learn to build some trust with, and over time help you see your own learning and growth happening!

I too struggle with saying things in groups, and with speaking up about things that feel unfair or bother me.

I hope you feel less alone and that there are supportive creatures here who care about you!

Not sure if you are looking for advice, but if I could offer any I'd ask if you have access to counselling of some sort... having a counsellor who I can share all of what I'm going through and feeling has been very helpful for me, especially in the process of opening up to people again and working on some social skills

Sounds like some past trauma. Maybe someone was very dismissive of you growing up, or someone reacted in negative way to something you said that now you're having a hard time speaking your mind because of it. Hoping you can put in the work to be more open to whats on your mind.

It's hard not being able to be yourself and voice your thoughts. I think as long as what you have to say isn't coming from a bad place, even if it's not entirely positive, should still be voiced.

If someone is making you feel bad, do voice it. They may not know they are making you feel this way and may do something so they don't make you feel that. I was like you in the past. Had I voiced certain things I would have saved myself from going through some uncomfortable situations.

*boops* you got this!