Welcome to this year's Asbestos Shoveling Competition! Teams of hale, hearty, and hard-nosed asbestos miners will compete to see who's the quickest at filling a 50-gallon drum with raw blue asbestos tailings. We have a lot of raw blue asbestos tailings around here, and aside from rolling ourselves down the piles outside the mine for fun, this is the best thing we can think of to do with all that stuff. (Ol' Pete once tried grinding it up and using it as coffee creamer, but he said he didn't care for the taste.) The winning team will receive a $10 coupon to our local Blue Sky Diner, as well as first pick of next month's shovel shipment. So limber up, take a deep breath, and wear something you don't mind gettin' dirty, 'cause all that dust that gets kicked up gets in EVERYTHING.

... Okay, so this is a weird one, but it's a silly idea that I've had for a while now and I'm sure there's bound to be SOME interest in it. If you'd like to play the part of a competitive asbestos miner (not minor, mind you-- don't hold your breath for the "playing in an asbestos tailing sandpit" ych) please consider bidding! Any character that can hold a shovel is welcome, and while I encourage you to get in the competitive spirit and wear appropriate clothing for the task at hand, any outfit or even no outfit at all is acceptable as long as everything is kept SFW. You can also request minor changes to the posing or expressions or anything you'd like, within reason.

The starting bid for every slot is $10, minimum bid is $1, and the auction ends at 11 PM CST on 7/19! This auction follows the fifteen minute rule, meaning it ends at the specified time or 15 minutes after the last bid, whichever comes last. Bid in the comments below, and thank you very much!

And, of course, I'm making this all in good fun and do not mean to downplay or belittle those who have had to deal with the complications of asbestos exposure. If you or a loved one has been diagnosed with Mesothelioma you may to be entitled to financial compensation, just not from me. I hear there's a guy you can talk to about that.