YURI! YURI EVERYWHERE!

No! Cupcakes are sweet and delicious.

The story, which totally does not exist, and if it does it's just a bad dream worthy only of being forgotten, is totally not titled "Cupcakes" in the slightest, not even a little bit!

No, that's the same TOTALLY NONEXISTENT story. It was titled "Cupcakes", UNDESERVEDLY so because cupcakes are sweet and delicious.

Speaking of which, do you have a link to that comic you showed me, featuring the entire mane cast's reaction to said nonexistent story? ^.^

This one? http://kinkyturtle.masemware.com/pi.....-online-bw.gif

That's exactly the one, sir! I finally got to show it to the Silver Brumby. He was suitably amused. (And definitely sympathizes with you about Cupcakes. He won't touch that with a 10 meter pole).

Oh lord, I laughed so hard. Yes! The fandom needed to see that!

And poor Rarity! One hopes she never stumbles across the fanfic in which she sews together a stallion boyfriend for herself in her basement. It ends with some poor nameless pony dead, Pinkie Pie murdered by a crazed Rarity, Rarity's "boyfriend" killing himself ("I. Must. Not. LIVEEEEE!"), poor little Sweetie Belle having an emotional breakdown and forgetting she ever had a sister... and poor crazy Rarity locked in a madhouse, singing to herself about her broken heart. It was much worse than that Other Story because it had something like actual characterization and plot in it. You felt pity for Rarity and everyrone else involved.

I will never in a million years -- no, a THOUSAND YEARS -- understand why people are so fascinated with this junk. I wanna ask the bronies, "If you love these ponies so much, why do you keep wanting to kill them?"

Wll, I do like MLP grimdark when it's done right. The problem is in the 'doing it right' part. For instance, the "Silent Ponyville" story works well because for all the trauma that pours down on her pretty head, Pinkie Pie stays Pinkie Pie. And while the ending has a sting in it, it's still a good end in many ways.

But yeah, That Other Story is just boringly gross IMHO. It's a SyFy Saturday gorefest of a movie with slightly better writing. And that's just plain boring.

I know the fanfic of which you speak and it is a terrible thing. :c

I've read it. I have a pretty strong stomach, but that one made me ill. The alternate ending made it all worth it though.

As does this.

Which alternate ending? The one where it was all a dream? Or the one where we learn it's all a horror movie being directed by MLP Hitchcock?

Or the one where Apple Bloom comes under Pinkamena's sway and learns the joys of eating horse meat?

(And seriously, sweet little Apple Bloom as a sociopathic cannibal? What the *&#! is up with some Fanfic writers?)

The dream one. And at the point where they brought in Apple Bloom, I officially stopped being able to take it seriously. XD They were clearly just trying to push buttons at that point, and whenever I can tell someone is deliberately trying to manipulate me, that's when I stop cooperating with them and start laughing at them. XD

"Now who's a blank flank?"

Oh, that was just a later scene in the movie (that's my opinion and I'm sticking with it) Hitch shot wth the girls. I do wonder how they ever convinced AJ to let her little sister play a raving maniac on the screen, though.

Then again, I could see Applebloom trying it for an "acting cutie mark".

CUTIE MARK CRUSADERS HORROR MOVIE MONSTERS!

Y'know, the more I think about it... Whoever wrote the "Hitchcock" ending, I'm sure their heart was in the right place, but "Cupcakes" doesn't seem worthy of Hitchcock.

Maybe Tobe Hoofer.

Yeah -- "Cupcakes" was bottom of the barrel 80's slasher film dreck. A Hitchcock MLP horror story would be much classier.

And talking horror and Pinkie Pie, did you ever see this story (not gory, I swear)? http://www.equestriadaily.com/2011/.....-celestia.html

You might want to tell Pinkie to be a little more careful who she pulls her pranks on in the future.

Pinkie is always careful! Remember, she nixed Rainbow Dash's plan to prank Fluttershy.

Reading the story now. I just got to the part where it turns gory, you liar. Ah, yet another stupid damn zombie story. Skipping ahead to the end. Aha, the zombie attack is fake. It's also waaay darker and scarier than anything Pinkie Pie would ever actually come up with. Out of character.

<StrongBad> Not good enough, F minus minus.

I'm kind of gravedigging here, but I liked the alt ending Rocket to Insanity and the alt ending of that alt ending [where it all ends up okay in the end. :D]

PERSONALLY.

I'm with Stoker on the usually strong stomach but that fic kinda upset me in some ways [I guess because I'm really good at mentally visualizing things?] The alt ending[s] I read helped me make peace with the whole thing, though. ;)

I figure she had a bad dream after eating those baked bads.

Definitely -- the baked bads are to blame!

severings worse. I love the one where a rebellion kills Celestia but twilight and Luna fail to raise the sun and the planet freezes.

Haven't read that one yet

no the best is "Rocket to Insanity"

So far my favorite fanfic is Better Living Through Science and Ponies, my favorite short is Binky Pie.

Related to pic, I also refuse to read that particular fic.

I blame BLTSP for setting me on the dark path of reading and enjoying fan fiction >:C

You know, this is actually pretty brilliant.

Pinkie Pie's certainly Cloud Cuckoolander enough to HAVE a bad dream of the depth of "Cupcakes", particularly after the events of Party of One. But she's the quintessential chaotic good character.

Though for her own sake, Dash better hope she doesn't DESCRIBE the dream...

(And yes, MLP is a fanfiction magnet. It's actually inspired ME to write one after 20 years off the writing circuit. No, it's not in the LEAST grim or dark, and actually treats the Mane Cast character in it. Rainbow Dash, with as much respect as I can muster).

Yeah, all I know about that totally not-existing fic is glimpses from "the Party Hasn't Ended" and "Celestia Look Before You Sleep". I'd like to keep it that way. Part of me is intrigued by the notion of this alternate ending, but a larger part of me still doesn't want to read it if it goes the same way....

If your curiosity gets the better of you, I wrote a journal post a short time back where I spoiled all the plot points in a single sentence written in a flat, matter-of-fact tone that robs them of most of their power.

(And I had to read it because not reading it wasn't helping, at a time when it seemed no one on Ponychan would SHUT UP about it.)

This is sweet, in any case. ^_^

dat wingboner

i enjoyed reading cup- sorry, the gory fanfiction which does not exist. However, it was apparently written by someone who was angry at all the Rainbow Pie shipping. I think that's a terrible motivation to write a sick fanfiction. Sick fanfiction should be written for sick fanfiction's sake and nothing else. That's why this alternative ending is my favorite.

Besides, we all know Pinkie <3's Dash. When I was reading the gory fanfiction which still does not exist, I imagined Pinkie was being extra cruel as a kind of misguided, psychotic expression of love. That made it extra sad and a more worthwhile read.

Oh, sheesh. Everypony knows, if you don't like a particular shipping, you make fun of it by having the characters go online and be disgusted by it! Like when I was getting tired of AppleDash:

AJ: "WHY the hay am ah MARRYIN' Rainbow Dash?!"
RD: "And how come I'M the one wearing the DRESS?!"

Where can I read this alternate ending?

I forget where I read it. But if you do a search for "cupcakes alternate ending" you might find it.

Do a search for "Equestria Daily" and "Cupcakes" together. They now have all the alternate endings together in one spot.

Right on. I agree with you all the way.

I finally broke down and read it, and my big reaction was "Meh". I read much, much worse while growing up. It's really vastly overrated.

And now if no one minds, I'm off to chisel a hole in my skull and pour in the burning lye so i can sleep tonight.

Can't sleep, the pink pony is going to eat me...

The story itself wouldn't be such a problem if it weren't so inexplicably popular. That's why it screwed with me so bad: during the brief period I browsed ponychan, people wouldn't stop talking about it. I'd just found this cool new fandom, and I became paranoid that I'd have to stop associating with it.

I think people read it just so they can say that they read the vilest MLP fanfic in existence. Just like fellow monsterpieces My Immortal and that one about Harry Potter by Enoby whatever-the-heck-her-name-is.

Now that I think about it, the real problem is when people take these nasty ideas and act like they're canon. I knew there was a real problem when I looked up Pinkie's "Cupcakes" song on YouTube and all the comments were stuff like "OMG I'LL NEVER LOOK AT CUPCAKES THE SAME WAY AGAIN" or "Pinkie also adds a Dash of flavor, heh heh heh".

Enjoying a grimdark story is fine, but why do so many people prefer to live in its sick twisted world than the actual canon world of the show they're supposedly fans of?

Dash, keep an eye on your wings and cutie mark.

That fic wasn't that bad. What's worse is something sick, twisted, and Mary-Sue'd like the self-insertion fic "Stasis" on fanfiction.net.

That fic was bad, yes, but also funny. "Sorry, your number came up" and "I don't make rules" made me nearly suffocate it was so damn funny - think how weird and conflicting it is. She sounds like she hates doing it but once she gets going the bloodlust just takes over, until she realizes what the hell she did, but she has no choice in the matter, like some sort of sick, creepy, pink grim reaper.

It's not just gory for no reason, and a shameless self-insertion fic, its character is also a Sue who managed to kick Nightmare Moon's ass with a monkey wrench and rip a manticore to pieces with said monkey wrench, as well as level half of Ponyville, and kill or seriously injure 14 of Celestia's guards. Not to mention has a pet giant mantis that thinks he's his dad, and oh yes, he can't die because he's got freaky future technology to "reconstruct" himself. And he TGAP Trixe on his side, who apparently cares for him in some weird, unconditional way, regardless of his heinous crimes and murders.

Did I mention that they made Zecora randomly run around throwing Poison Joke in your faces, which while is harmless to the pony folk, is apparently a DEADLY AND CONTAGIOUS POISON to humans?

And yeah. It's THAT kind of self-insertion. A human-OC-meets-MLP-and-owns-its-ass fic. *headdesk* Why the hell did I read that damn thing...

...and that comment made absolutely no sense. After the "sick, creepy, pink grim reaper." I'm refering to "Stasis" not that fic.

...suddenly wish I could edit that part about Stasis out and just leave the parts about that fic.

Pinky Pie doesn't have time to waste on hugs! She has a friend to make. :)c