TF Story Commission for   dr_doc_md , who's gotten themselves a unpaid internship working as a Jester for the illustrious Booster! Though he seems to be in need of a lot of training.

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Your 'Jest' Desserts

You were playing on your Switch, Playing the Super Mario RPG remake. You'd always been a fan of the original on the SNES, so hearing there would be an HD remake had you excited, and you bought it right away. Already you had pushed your way through the adventure at a breakneck pace, using your knowledge and experience, alongside a healthy amount of grinding, to easily overcome any obstacles you faced, until you finally arrived at Booster's Tower. While not the most difficult, it did have the most amount of puzzles and games, where your combat prowess would not be of any use. No Matter. You could still remember the original solutions. Hopefully they hadn't changed them…

… They had. Or you had possibly misremembered how this puzzle went. You were certain the portraits went in this order, right? Or maybe this order? Arg… dammit… with a deep sigh, you navigated your way back down the tower to double check the exact order.

As you finally figured out that stupid painting puzzle (taking a photo of the portrait’s order) and begun once again scaling the tower, you noticed a new set of double doors while walking back towards where the puzzle had been located. You distinctly recalled that there hadn't been such a thing in the original… Was it bonus content? It had to be, right? You interacted with the door as Mario opened it up slightly.

The scene transitioned to the interior of the room, dark, Mario nowhere in sight. Slowly the darkness would fade, revealing a stage positioned dead centre in the screen.

Two spotlights would swirl around the stage, darting back and forth, before the curtain opened with a burst of confetti, revealing two Jesters Balancing atop colourful balls.

“Welcome, Welcome, to Knife and Grate Guy's Spectacular and Sensational Magic Show! We're all so glad you could make it to tonight's evening performance. We have quite the lineup in store for you all here at Booster's Tower, so hold onto your seats and get ready for some fun!”

What followed was about 5 minutes of watching the two clowns performing, juggling, comedy skits, even impressive balancing acts, though it could’ve felt like hours with how long the cutscene seemed to drag on. You didn’t even notice the stage slowly getting closer to the screen, nor the applause getting louder.

“Our next trick will require an (un)willing assistant. Can we get a volunteer from the audience please? How about… you! The one watching us from the back!” They'd say, the spotlights moving down the aisles, passing over your screen, the sudden influx of light blinding you.

“Alright. One, Two, and…!”

There was a loud popping sound, before a wave of applause. But it wasn't coming from your device, instead it seemed to echo all around you. When you finally managed to clear your eyes, you found yourself looking over the theatre. Not through a screen, but in person.

“Please welcome our mysterious friend to the stage!”

You were taken aback, “This can't be possible. How am I here?! to be a trick of some kind?”

“No no no. There are no tricks up our sleeves~. Whoops!” Knife Guy would say, pantomiming pulling back sleeves, only for an entire magicians kit to tumble out from nowhere, cards, a wand, some coloured handkerchiefs, even a tophat from which a dove emerged, cooing as it flew off into the crowd. The silence was deafening

“Okay. Now there is nothing up our sleeves.” Grate Guy would follow up, sparking laughter from the crowd as the two bowed.

“Now, we're all so happy for you to finally join us. You seemed to be enjoying our performance so much, we thought it'd only be fair that you get to see it nice up and close.”

“We'll even waive the entry fee, just this once.” Grate Guy would chime in.

“However,” the two would say in sync, “we have a very particular dress code for our performers here in Booster Tower, so we're going to have to address that before we proceed”

“Just hold still, we'll get you stage worthy before you can say ‘I love working for Booster for all eternity!’”

With a clap of their hands, Grate Guy summoned a large curtain of red and green fabric behind you. With an acrobatic display, Knife Guy cut them into precise ribbons, before snapping his fingers as the ribbons flowed onto your body, leaving not an inch uncovered.

“As you know, our company uniform follows a ‘one size fits all’ basis” Knife Guy would state as the ribbons wrapped around every inch of your body, forming a striped tunic around your torso, pointed boots, and even a red Jester cap on your head!

“Don't you mean a “all fit one size” basis?” Grate Guy corrected as the new outfit SQUEEZED your body tightly, compressing it down as, before your eyes, your body began to actually shrink down, molded and reshaped like clay by the fiendish fabric, losing height like someone had been pressing down on you from above, smaller and smaller, your head smooshed down into your torso, neck nonexistent, not to mention your new stubby legs that barely poked out from under your new tunic.

Your arms were squished down, becoming wiry and thin as your gloved hands grew and swell to cartoonish proportions, almost as large as your head.

The two clowns watched as you stumbled forward on your new legs. The shoes felt odd, far too large, yet perfectly snug against your feet in spite of its unusual shape. You could even swear you could feel the texture of the waxed wood beneath them, less like you were wearing them, and more like… they were your feet now?

“Hmm… it's still missing something… ah!” Grate Guy would muse, before reaching behind them and pulling out a mask

“Hey New Guy! Catch!” They said, winding up like a pitcher, before sending the mask hurdling towards you. Unable to even keep your balance properly, dodging was out of the question. All you could do is raise your gloved hands to protect yourself as it rocketed straight into you, knocking you over

When you got over the shock of having been fastballed by a Mask, you clumsily staggered back to your feet, letting out a groan. But despite that, what came out of your mouth sounded more like a giggle than anything.

Where had the mask gone? You looked around confused, before reaching up to feel your face. Your concerns were realised as you felt something solid and hard where skin should have been. You stared at the two clowns, trying to interrogate them, but all that came from your face was incoherent chuckles and laughs.

“Hmm, I think they like it!” Grate Guy would exclaim, to the amusement of the audience as you tugged at the mask, trying to get it off. But it was like it was glued on. You tugged as hard as you could, feeling it start to give, but like elastic it suddenly shot back onto your face, knocking you back onto your butt.

Letting out another unintentional giggle, you staggered back upright, hearing a bunch of jingling as you started down at your body, finding lots of tiny chimes attached to your clothes, from your shoes to your Jester cap, to even a new pointed ruff around your neck absolutely laden with them!

The audience loved it, much to your chagrin, laughing at your predicament, until a large bang at the back of the hall quieted them, the doors opening, letting light into the otherwise dark halls.

“Ooh! Perfect timing. Introducing our special guest for the evening, Mario!”

One of the spotlights would shift to the entrance to the theatre, revealing Mario and the others, exactly where you had left them moments ago

‘And with a 1, 2, and…’

‘Presto!’

In a puff of white smoke, Mario was suddenly transported onto the stage opposite of where you stood, the spotlights circling in to illuminate just the two of you.

Honestly, now that you weren't controlling him from behind a screen, Mario seemed a lot more imposing, almost larger than life. Though it could also be due to your massive drop in height.

“For this performance, our latest addition to our troop shall prove his worth by facing the Prince of Pipes, the Crusher of Koopas, Mario Jumpman Mario himself! Will he triumph and earn his freedom? Or will he fail in an incredibly amusing fashion and have to work overtime? Place your bets people. This is bound to be a Doozy!”

You tried to yell out a protest, but your permanently grinning mask would only emanate a cheery giggle.

“Okay new guy. Show us what you've got!” One of the two called out from the darkness, and with a hop, skip and a jump, Mario dashed towards you.

You weren't even given a chance to try and escape before the battle transition appeared and you found yourself on the other side of the combat that you'd grown so used to seeing from outsiders perspective, music blaring in the background as you found your body moving against its will, stuck in an idle animation.

“Don't be shy new guy! It's your turn! Give it your best shot! Really show him what the best performers (we could get for cheap) can do! ”

How were you supposed to do that? It's not like you had a hud or something you could use to pick out an attack-

Your body moved instinctively, a card appearing in your hand as you moved to throw it, the card travelling about three quarters of the way before slowing to a crawl, thudding against Mario before flopping weakly to the ground. If it had done any damage, you certainly couldn't tell.

“Do over!” Grate Guy yelled, as the spotlight briefly cut out and then back on, as you found yourself back where you had been standing a moment ago.

“Come on New Guy, what are we (not) paying you for? At least try to pretend you don't want to stick around as part of the family! Put a little more ‘oomph’ into your performance!”

This time you somehow managed to focus, managing to fling a full hand (pun intended) of cards directly at the moustached plumber, this time forcing him to guard, even knocking him back slightly as the cards bounced off his arms, one of which exploding like a firework.

“Ooh! Lucky Draw! You're a natural New Guy! When you put the effort in at least.”

You actually had a little hope, until Mario's turn came around, and you saw his body charge up with star power, text popping up alerting you he was about to perform a Super Jump. You didn't have much time to react before it began, as you tried to guard your head against the seemingly unending bounces, feeling your HP drain with every hit, much faster than you expected. Oh, why had you decided to grind up their levels before entering the tower…

You were feeling weak, but your mask refused to show any expression other than mischievous glee, as you slowly stood back up.

“Come on New Guy! The Show must go on! Do something flashy for your final act!” Grate Guy yelled out

“Yeah! Make your loss entertaining!” An audience member cried out. Well, at least they weren't pretending anymore? Well… you weren't going to pretend either. There was no way you were going to survive the next turn. You had to make this count. But your cards weren't going to do the trick. You needed something stronger. If this was a game, surely you had an inventory, right? Your pants didn't have any pockets, so you were forced to quite literally search your sleeves for any tricks you could use to win.

You rummaged around for something you could use, come on… what was the point of magic pockets if there wasn't anything inside them? You were starting to panic, until your hands brushed up against something flat and rectangular, and definitely plastic. Wait… could it be? You tugged hard, revealing a glass screen and colourful joycons. It was! Somehow your switch had been transported with you during this weird… sequence. And it was still working, displaying the ongoing battle, Mario facing off against a masked clown, your name gone, simply labelled as ‘Jester’.

You felt a wave of… dread? Anger? It was hard to place. Not even the game seemed to acknowledge who you were… but wait. You clutched the device in your gloved palms. No no, wait, if you had this, maybe you could undo everything? Your pudgy fingers struggled to press the buttons, but you managed to open up the menu of the game. Okay… hopefully this worked…? You took a deep breath and attempted to exit the game, but before you could do so… suddenly you felt an unexplained urge run through you, as you held up the switch in one hand, dangling your hand above it, before suddenly pressing down, sandwiching it between the two. ‘Poof!’ the switch vanished in your palms, and when you opened them, you found it had been replaced by a red glowing crystal, your mask letting out a cheerful laugh.

Before you could even mourn the loss of your switch and subsequent chance to escape, your body continued to move on its own, instinctively raising the gem up above your head, causing to glow and vanish in a flash of light, a large flaming meteor suddenly crashing down onto Mario burying him under a sudden burst of fire, that despite its magnitude, left the stage strangely unmarked. Not even a little bit charred.

Wait… did it do it? Did ‘you’ do it?

“Oh! Wow! It looks like the underdog finally bites back! This doesn’t look good for Mario. Has the New Guy finally given the pesky plumber his ‘Game Over’?!” Knife Guy would comment from the sidelines as the audience watched onwards. There wasn’t any movement or noise. Had you… actually won? Surely something would’ve happened by now, right? Maybe… you were free?

The relief didn't last long as like the Terminator, Mario Mario emerged from the smoke, his clothes charred and body scuffed, but still very alive. And though his expression remained unchanged, you still felt that oppressive aura about him as the mighty plumber drew his hammer and charged at you. Though you tried to flee, your feet remained rooted to the ground, as you could only raise your hands to protect yourself, hoping this wouldn't hurt, as the Hammer made contact, sending you flying off the stage to the sound of celebration and applause, before your body exploded like a firework.

You suddenly snapped back into consciousness, finding yourself somewhere else in Booster Tower, judging by the polished checkerboard floors and tacky art. And you were still a Jester. Mario, thankfully, was nowhere to be found, as you were still reeling from that rather traumatising encounter with the moustached italian.

The sound of squeaking rubber alerted you to the reappearance of Knife Guy, or was it Grate Guy? You always got them mixed up. The Yellow One.

“Good performance out there New Guy! You really worked the crowd with that battle, especially the climax where you exploded! Really blew everyone away.” They chortled. Ah. Knife Guy

“Ah, you seem confused why you're still here? Well, duh. You respawned! We have a ‘very’ effective Healthcare system for all our employees (excluding chomp related injuries).”

“Speaking of which. Welcome aboard! That makes you Jester…” They'd take out a pair of comedically thick glasses to read a sheet of paper “119. But I'll just call you Jester, if that's all right?” You tried to protest, saying your name was… was… what was it again?

“Great! I knew you'd be on board for it. Now, Booster has very high standards for his tower, and it needs to be kept perfectly clean at all times. So, off stage, you'll be doing chores around the tower. You can start by mopping this floor. Someone's tracked muddy boot prints all throughout. This is why I use a ball to get around.” They clapped their hands as a large mop pooled into being, falling into your hands.

“Well! Best get to work! We've got a busy week ahead of us, training you up into a proper Jester and all that. We'll make a fine clown of you yet!” And with that they leapt away, leaving you alone with the mop. Much like on the stage, you found yourself unable to leave, the mop seemingly bound to the room, and stuck to your gloved hands, unable to be dropped. All you could do for now was mop the floor as had been demanded of you, and hope you may one day find a way out of this tedious tower.