It was almost 2 -- now only 4 hours of sleep was possible as the sheets were draped over his face. The seventeen year-old ferret was stuck to bathe only in his own scent, and to wish for some reason that it would change so he could sleep more comfortably. He wished for something different... something like Jason.
"Jason?" Ivan asked himself silently, "Why Jason?"
Why Jason? That had been the question of the day. Since he had touched the bony arm of that taller weasel in the school hallway earlier that day, he hadn't been able to get his new friend out of his mind. Again, Ivan's wandering mind led him down a dark unexplored road toward self-loathe, mind-mutilation, and unjustified criticism. Why would Jason be stuck in my head? Why else except...
Ivan aggressively threw the sheets off his head and gripped his hair, palms over his face, "I'm not gay!" He grumbled. He pressed his paws harder against his forehead, trying his hardest to empty his mind of the sinister thought, "God... Jesus... I love you." He whispered, "And I know you love me... but... isn't feeling this way a sin?" His eyes peered left and right as he swallowed some thick saliva, nerves in a bundle, building in his chest, "Jesus..." His lower lip began to quiver, "I'm a holy man." His thoughts trailed back to that ferret he was obviously in love with, through which he was able to hold back his tears of shame.