This song has been on repeat in my head all week
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dyXT6dgEHuM

Lyrics
A room full of people, too anxious to mingle
My brain yells at me “it’s the perfect time
To get existential, your body’s a rental”
Push back, tell myself that I’m just fine
More people show up, I think I might throw up
Go out for some fresh air to clear out my mind
There’s more people out there this shit is a nightmare
I wanna go home, but I’ll piss off my ride

So I’ll just keep drinking.
And hope for the best
Let my brain do the rest
Man, fuck it whatever I guess

Sometimes I think I’ve wasted my whole life
Chasing my pipe dreams with shots and a whole lot of beer
A part of me figures there’s no fight left in the shell of a person I became this year.

Fuck, is that the first place I go?
Why can’t I, for one night, let this roll off my shoulders?
Damn this is bleak
I know I’m not this weak
I thought people got wiser when older?

Then again, I think I’ve wasted my whole life
Chasing my pipe dreams with shots and a whole lot of beer
A part of me figures there’s no fight left in the shell of a person I became this year
I wonder if my parents know why I’m a recluse and I don’t leave my house on most days
When my friends ask if am alright, I lie straight to their faces and say I’m okay.

I just want to be a normal person
Or anything but me...

Stuck In a room full of people, too anxious to mingle
My brain yelling that “it’s the perfect time
To get existential. your body’s a rental
And something is wrong I think you might be dying!”

Oh no.

To think that I’ve wasted my whole life chasing my pipe dreams with shots and a whole lot of beer
A part of me knows that there’s no fight left in the shell of a person I became this year.

I think that I’ve wasted my whole life.