This absolutely fantastic, happy, wonderful piece was done by the stupendous, awesome, amazing, fantastic  Henyoki

With this piece, I feel fine saying it here. I recently decided to try micro-dosing Hormone Replacement Therapy. I arranged for an appointment with Planned Parenthood and got prescribed some estrogen gel to start taking. I did so because I have a cousin whose recently been able to start doing estrogen herself, and when my mind realized I was going to have a front row seat to watching someone transition.

And what I felt most strongly was envy. Envy they were getting to do so.

I've experienced gender dysphoria for pretty much three decades. While it was usually the quieter kind, not constantly screaming in my ears, it was always there. Having moments where it would crop up and show itself. Poke and prod at my mind and remind me that I didn't feel right as I was.

Since getting on HRT, even if its a micro-dose, I have finally accepted a core truth of myself.

I am trans. I am a girl, a woman, and now, finally, after so long, I am taking the steps to be who I always should have been. I am beginning my transformation into the truer version of who I am, who I have always been.

My past is my past, and its not going to be forgotten. It will always be a part of me. But now I have a brighter future to look towards. A future where I can really be me, as I always should have been. It might be later than a part of me wishes, but as its been told to me, its never too late to begin this journey.

I am so happy, my eyes are wet and damp and I have this big huge smile on my face right now. This really captures the feelings I've been going through for the last eighteen days. I've only just begun and I already feel so much better! This piece is the cherry on top for me right now, I'm just... I'm just so happy with how this turned out~! <3 <3 <3

I know the journey isn't going to be all sunshine and rainbows. I know these times aren't the best for folks like me who are Trans. But I finally got my answer. I finally have my truth. And its time I embrace this wonderful change.

Thank you a thousand, no, a million times Henyoki~!


For anyone interested, Here is a google doc outlining my experiences with gender dysphoria.