Is human life starting to feel a little lonely?
Have you ever wondered what it would be like to be much shorter?
Do you want to be the envy of all your friends?


If you’re currently reading this then you’re either an aspiring weresquirrel who's here to prepare for their new life or you picked up the wrong pamphlet from the metamorphosis section of your local clinic, but since you’re here anyway you might as well stay - maybe you’ll come to realise that this might actually be the pamphlet that you were looking for all along.
It doesn’t matter who you are, we can all agree that it would be nice to have a break from the everyday stresses of human life. Some people go on vacation, others try to meditate, but a small percentage of the population decides that turning into a squirrel and scampering around the forest is the perfect form of escapism for them.
This guide will explain what weresquirrels are and everything you need to know before choosing to adopt this new squirrelly lifestyle.

It’s imperative that we clarify that this guide is meant for those who are yet to contract this particular strain of therianthropy - if you’re already permanently cursed to turn into a squirrel every full moon and are feverishly rummaging through the pages in a desperate attempt to find out what you’re supposed to do now, try looking at the section discussing your upcoming transformation.
If the full moon is imminent, we suggest that you look up our emergency guide to weresquirrels while you still have opposable thumbs and you are still human height. If your body is already too squirrelly to use the internet, we wish you the best of luck and hope you enjoy your new life.

If you’re still not fully bought on the idea of becoming a squirrel every full moon, we’ve got a few reasons that might tip the scales for you fence-sitters.
Let’s start with the most obvious one - the big bushy tail. The most defining feature about squirrels are their obnoxiously fluffy tails that they love to shove in everyone’s face, so imagine how amazing it’d be if you had your own tail to cuddle up to and fall asleep in. As you would expect with a tail that’s more than half the length of your entire body, it has a multitude of uses.
Ever wished you could have your own personal blanket wherever you go? Squirrel tail
Ever needed something to cuddle after a long day? Squirrel tail
Ever wanted a best friend attached to your back at all times of the day? Squirrel tail
Basically it’s a glorified blanket, but it’s the fluffiest, cuddliest and most comfortable blanket you’ll ever have, and it’s permanently attached to you at all times.
Another obvious benefit of being a squirrel is that you get to be squirrel-sized. Being smaller comes with lots of advantages, but the most common answer that weresquirrels give when asked about the benefits of being small is that it allows them to get up to all sorts of mischievous shenanigans. But besides rummaging through your neighbour’s trash and skittering across trees, being adorable-sized also allows you to do things that aren’t possible in your human form. We are under obligation to dissuade any future weresquirrels from using their newfound size for illegal purposes… but we also know what you squirrels are like; we can’t stop you.
Swiftly moving onto the next point so that none of you get any ideas, the next cool thing about being a squirrel is that turning into a squirrel is much less taxing on the human body than other more intensive transformations. Seeing as you’re several words deep into this pamphlet on weresquirrels I think it’s safe to say that you’re familiar with transformation. Imagine your boring human body having to go through the physical toll of contorting and shifting into a new form; it’d be much easier to morph into something smaller like a squirrel instead of having to endure your body growing into something much bigger.
The last thing that must be mentioned when talking about squirrels is their undeniable cuteness factor. There isn’t a single person on this planet who doesn’t think that squirrels are adorable (and if they do then they’re probably a werewolf anyway so it doesn’t count). Being so cute means that you’ll get away with a lot more than your average werebeast, since humans tend to be more accepting of you when you tell them that you turn into a harmless, little squirrel every full moon instead of a snarling, hulking beast. Be sure to use your cuteness to your advantage whenever you feel like telling the humans close to you about your condition or if you get caught transforming on a full moon.

Now, if being a weresquirrel was all sunshine and rainbows, we would’ve already bitten every human on the planet and achieved global domination already (something that we’re very capable of doing) but unfortunately, we are permitted by law to make sure that you have an informed decision about any future transformations you decide to undergo. So, before we convert you into a loyal weresquirrel subject, allow us to inform you of the not so nice parts of weresquirrel life.
So, the big one is that us squirrels, we’re not all that tall. But, what we lack in height we make up for in tail size. However, this small stature and very visible tail makes us very alluring prey for the local werewolves and other hungry werebeasts of the area. This isn’t much of a problem thankfully, as we squirrels are way more sophisticated than those savage beasts, and unlike us, those feral creatures don’t have the skill and agility required to climb trees: meaning you’re free to throw acorns, or whatever you can get your grubby little claws onto, at the oversized mutt to taunt it - such is our squirrelly right to do so.
Another disadvantage that we’ve been advised to inform you of is the fact that, even in your human form, you’ll still have buckteeth. They won’t be as prominent as they are when you’re a squirrel, but they’re a bit of a giveaway to anyone who’s aware of weresquirrels, which thankfully is mostly just other weresquirrels so there isn’t much to worry about. Plus, buckteeth aren’t the worst werebeast residual to have: they can be hidden somewhat easily and aren’t as obvious as a squirrel tail sticking around in your human form all that time; imagine trying to hide that from your close ones. However, over the past few generations of weresquirrels, buckteeth have become less of a thing to hide as society at large has become more accepting of stuff like that. This has resulted in newer weresquirrels showing off and flaunting them which stands in opposition to the more traditional practice of hiding them.
Another thing that we can’t really sugarcoat is that becoming a weresquirrel does more than just change you physically; you’ll be a lot less human and a lot more squirrelly in every way you and your soon-to-be-squirrel-human-hybrid brain can imagine. There are several ways that this could be both good and bad for you, but one of the more noticeable but less thought-about ways is that you’ll be significantly more jumpy. Squirrels are naturally skittish creatures; they have to be on the lookout for even the slightest of sounds.
There is one final thing that we have to disclose to you before you start climbing trees and stashing nuts for winter. Most other weres retain most of their humanity when they transform into their less human selves; the instincts from their animal side simply aren’t strong enough to overwhelm the part of their mind that’s still human. This means that no matter how bestial and feral a werebeast looks on the outside, inside they’re still very much human and more than likely won’t devolve into a full-on animal.
Weresquirrels, on the other hand, retain much less of their humanity when they shift. The problem isn’t that their instincts are as strong as something like a weredragon, but that instead of doing things like hoarding, weresquirrels are more inclined to act more squirrelly and mischievous. This results in them leaning into their transformation more, barely putting up any resistance and letting the squirrel side overpower the human side.
Several scientific studies have been done to examine the likelihood that a weresquirrel is able to resist their own instincts and, of the very limited few that were able to do so, most had either been infected for several years or inherited the condition genetically and had been transforming for most of their life. The rest, although very determined to prove the hypothesis wrong, eventually succumbed to their basest desires and had to be placed in cages to prevent them from bouncing around the walls of the lab.
Although the idea of not having full control over yourself may be scary to many interested in becoming a weresquirrel, we ask you to not think of it as you ‘losing control’ or the squirrel ‘taking over’, but instead view it as becoming a more excitable version of yourself. Many first-time weres who have previously expressed a fear of losing their humanity have gone on to say that the whole transformation process is surprisingly freeing and that feeling the squirrel side of themselves begin to seep in was actually quite relieving in a sense. There is a communal sense of reassurance amongst weresquirrels as they are free to transform with the knowledge there is a part of them that’s permanently part-squirrel and will keep them safe.

Now that we’ve got that over with, let’s go over the few ways that you can go from boring human to fluffy squirrel.
The most common way, of course, is the classic bite from another weresquirrel. As is common with most werespecies, getting a chomp from your local fluffy-tailed friend is all that it takes to make your next full moon extremely memorable. However, it’s important to be aware of the fact that squirrel teeth aren’t as sharp as other weres, so be prepared for more than a slight nibble as their teeth attempt to make their way into you.
Another method of infection that most humans are unaware of is consuming nuts from cursed trees. This is a lesser-known method for the simple fact that most cursed trees can be found in enchanted forests, and most humans who mistakenly wander into enchanted forests usually don’t end up leaving fully human. Thankfully, being cursed to become a weresquirrel for life is considered getting off easy compared to some of the other things that happen in enchanted forests.
Similarly, it’s also possible to get infected by eating fruits from enchanted forests that have been stashed high up in trees - usually trees located outside of enchanted areas. If a human accepts the challenge of climbing up one such tree to retrieve the fruit and decides to eat that fruit as their reward, they’ll quickly find it much easier to climb back down that tree. There have been a handful of cases where headstrong individuals hastily climb up these trees and are unable to muster the courage to climb back down in which eating this cursed fruit and permanently altering their species is their only safe way down.
Like with most uncommon species of werebeast, there aren’t all too many methods of infection; thankfully your local coven of witches will be more than happy to help you with your transformation needs - some of them even include a complementary basket of goodies that the new you will love. Just make sure that you have the right payment for them, otherwise you might find yourself being cursed to turn into something like a frog or a cow every moon (unless you were secretly hoping to become a werecow, in which case, take your chance).

Once you’ve been infected, the next thing on your weresquirrel shopping list is to prepare for your first full moon.
The most important rule to any werespecies is to stay hidden, so your first order of business is to seek out and prepare an area for your transformation to take place in. Thankfully, being a weresquirrel means that you’re one of the few werespecies that have a transformation where they shrink in size, meaning you don’t have to worry about securing a big, open space. In fact, we recommend that you prepare for your transformation somewhere indoors, the more hidden the better. This means that if you don’t want your family finding out about your bushy-tailed shenanigans, you could always hide away and transform in your wardrobe or maybe even inside one of the drawers of your desk - just make sure you get out once you start turning back into a human.
Locking yourself away in your furniture has the additional bonus of preventing your escape and unleashing your curse on whoever you can get your buckteeth into. The last thing you’d want human-you to wake up to is your entire family scowling at you with bushy tails coming out of their backs… unless that is something you want… in that case make sure to buy more copies of this guide for each one of them so we can profit off of your full moon frenzy.
Once you’ve found your hideout, the next step is to make sure you don’t get too agitated or bored during the night. The best way to keep squirrel-you occupied is to make sure you have plenty to eat and drink. Just think of yourself as your own pet squirrel, buy yourself some nuts to munch on and you should be set for the whole night; squirrels are simple creatures in fairness.
One safety concern that we have to warn you of is that due to the fact that squirrels are much smaller than humans; the human world will suddenly become much larger in comparison. This is harmless for the most part except for the fact that they don’t make clothes in squirrel sizes. We urge all new weresquirrels to take off their clothing beforethey start to transform; an XL shirt can be a squirrel’s worst enemy. Take it from us, you do not want to spend your first full moon trying to scurry out of the shirt that you forgot to take off. It’s really embarrassing.
Our final point isn’t necessary but it might make squirrelling much more comfortable in the long run. Try taking up yoga classes - we’re being serious! As beautiful and majestic as squirrel tails are, they’re also extremely taxing on your back and your spine in the long run. So if you’d rather not have a human body that feels 50 years old at 25, we highly suggest you start becoming more limber; your tail and your spine will thank us.


So, you’ve gotten infected, you’ve prepped an area to transform in, which means we can finally get to the part that you’ve been waiting for: The Transformation.
You’re standing in your bedroom, making sure to remove your clothes and pile them somewhere for the morning. You’ve parted the curtains on your window, allowing you to fully soak in the beauty of the moon, it looks brighter than before. The first thing you’ll notice is your new instincts slowly creeping in, your hands will begin to shake, you might shuffle around a little, your senses will heighten with you becoming much more jumpy and skittish as a result. You’ll start sniffing things as you become much more aware of every aspect of your body.
To combat the skittishness you’ve just developed, your body will start sprouting fur. The sensation of having a wave of warm, soft fur spreading across the length of your entire body will hopefully calm even the most frightened of weresquirrels. The fur coming in first is an important step, serving as a comfort that you can use during the more demanding parts of your transformation.
You’ll be needing the comfort of your fur once your buckteeth start to come in right after. Unfortunately, the first time your teeth lengthen into buckteeth is the worst; it’s like having the worst toothache you’ll ever have in your life. But once you power through it with help from your fur, you’ll never have to go through it again. On subsequent full moons your teeth will still lengthen a tiny bit, but after your first full moon you’ll have somewhat prominent buckteeth for the rest of your life.
Unfortunately the pain doesn’t stop there; not long after your buckteeth come in you’ll find your back beginning to ache, specifically towards the base of your spine - you know what’s coming next. Your tail will either slowly worm its way out of you, which is quite painful and the process can last quite a while, or it’ll take you by surprise and suddenly and very painfully shoot out of you. But once it’s over, you’ll have a new, huggable appendage that’ll help you ride out the rest of the pain.
Speaking of pain, the next part of your transformation is totally painless which is a nice change of pace from your tail exploding out of your back. You’ll find yourself slowly shrinking down to the size of a squirrel - it’ll feel a little unusual at first, especially if you’ve never experienced shrinking before. Shrinking usually occurs all at once, with some weresquirrels having reported their bodies shrinking in segments which can be more than a little disorientating for even the most experienced of weresquirrels.
After you’ve shrunk down to an adorable size, you’ll suddenly find your hands and feet beginning to cramp up as your thumb and big toe begin to slide back towards your wrists and ankles, down the length of your lengthening paws. Your nails will sharpen, long enough to dig into trees in order to scurry up them, and you’ll become much more suited to scampering around on all fours as the structure of your feet becomes digitigrade - hope you enjoy walking on your tip-toes.
Those claws of yours will instantly rush to your face as you feel several changes in quick succession. Your ears will quiver and swivel as they relocate to the top of your furry head, you’ll feel a slightly uncomfortable itchy sensation as a few whiskers poke out from your upper lip, you’ll be too focused running your claws over every aspect of your new body that you won’t be able to notice the black beads that have become your eyes, and finally your nose will start twitching adorably as it darkens.
You’ve done very well to make it this far; you’ve almost finished becoming your perfect squirrel self. To round off the transformation you’ll feel something akin to a strong sneezing sensation as you scrunch up your mouth and nose. As you slowly let this ‘sneeze’ feeling out, you’ll notice your mouth and nose stretching out into a muzzle, it feels like some invisible force is dragging your muzzle out of you. As you inevitably grunt and groan from the unnerving feeling of having your face pull away from itself, you’ll notice your voice getting much higher and squeakier, much more suitable for a squirrel like yourself. Once your muzzle has fully formed you’re free to go explore life in a much more squirrelly and squeaky body.

Congratulations on making it through your first transformation!
Now that you’ve endured some of the strangest and strongest sensations of your life, you’re free to test the limits of your new squirrelly body. Fulfill those fantasies of hopping tree-to-tree, or maybe you’ve dreamed about building a nest in a tree and having your own authentic treehouse, or maybe you became a weresquirrel so you can run around in one of those hamster wheels - we don’t judge!
Before you scurry off into the wilderness and leave this leaflet behind forever, we’re legally obligated to give you a few precautionary tips before you inevitably get too excited about your new tail and give up on reading.
Firstly, you may have noticed but your squirrel body is much smaller than your human one. Despite having the cat-like ability to always land on your feet, you shouldn’t put your body in harm’s way just for the sake of testing it out. We highly encourage you to try tree-hopping or climbing the tallest tree in the forest, your new body is perfect for those sorts of things, but don’t let the rush and adrenaline of your transformation lull you into doing something stupid - like deciding to taunt the neighbourhood werewolf into going on an all-night chase with you (even if it is really fun to do). Apparently we have a duty of care to you young and impressionable weresquirrels and apparently we can’t just tell you to go and Cause Mischief and Be A Nuisance to your local community of werefolk.
Speaking of urges that you’ll have a hard time controlling, the cardinal rule of being a werebeast, to keep yourself hidden from the rest of the outside world, seems to not be ingrained into weresquirrels. You’d think this would be quite the problem but thankfully humans can’t resist the adorableness of a squirrel and will gladly fulfill your requests for food and pets as long as you stay squirrelly. As an official and highly-trusted source of information for all weres and weres-to-be, we’re highly recommending that you take advantage of your cute demeanor and steal as much food and scritches as you can from them >:3
Something that’s equally as important as headpats is informing those close to you of your new lifestyle. We’re not advising you to flex to everyone you know about having a big fluffy tail, but it’s inevitable that those who see you regularly or who see you during the night will notice that you seem suddenly different. You could try and come up with a convincing lie, but there’s not many things that’ll explain away your new prominent teeth and your sudden craving for nuts. Instead, just inform them about your new life as a weresquirrel; tell them “It’s like being a werewolf but instead I turn into a squirrel”. If their reaction is either curiosity, polite confusion, or involves them going “aww”, that’s a good sign! It means they’re open to hearing more and maybe even seeing you in action - thankfully squirrels are much more adorable than werewolves so by comparing yourself to a snarling beast you’re more likely to come out on top.
However, if the human you’ve confided in reacts by laughing at you, not taking you seriously, or unjustified anger, you have a few options to save yourself and the rest of the werefolk community. Start by playing it off as a joke, laugh along with them or apologise for your poor sense of humour and let them continue on with their day. Once they’ve left you alone, secretly order a little something from your local coven to make them forget that conversation or the existence of weres. However, sometimes that option isn’t available for some, maybe the person saw you with your tail out or maybe they’re threatening to call the police or animal control. If this extreme and rare occurrence happens to you, it is better for the rest of the werefolk community if you bite them and infect them - they’ll thank you once the next full moon hits.
It’s nice to have humans know about your weresquirrel antics, since they can be quite helpful when it comes to opening doors and windows for you as well as leaving little caches of nuts out for you on full moons, but it’s also important to get to know the local weresquirrel community. Locating the little scamps can be quite difficult but there are subtle indicators that give them away: look for a squirrel who’s too comfortable around humans, or maybe a squirrel that’s way too mischievous for its own good. But if you’re still struggling, try leaving a few welcoming gifts out in the forest and check to see if anyone shows up; just remember to not eat any of the food you set out.
Finally, it’s technically possible to shift in and out of your squirrel form outside of the full moon. However, we don’t suggest you attempt to do this unsupervised and without proper guidance from another were, preferably another weresquirrel whose shifted before. The process takes a few weeks to learn and several months to master and there can be several complications that arise when trying to shift from fully human to fully squirrel for the first time. You may have a full-sized squirrel tail in human form, you may get stuck as a squirrel-sized human or vice-versa, you may be unable to shift your vocal cords back. All of these reasons and more are the reason why it’s advisable to have someone experienced to supervise you, so they can either help you with your predicament or hide you away if someone walks in on you during your training.


That’s enough boring leaflet stuff from us; you’re now a fully-fledged weresquirrel who's escaped from the boredom of the human world and is now free to explore a much fluffier world of their own!
Thank you so much for reading this leaflet - we all wish you well on your new squirrelly escapades (promise us you won’t get yourself into too much trouble)
If you’ve made it to the end of this guide and still don’t think being a weresquirrel suits you, we urge you to check out one of our other guides that may help you realise what type of animal you’ve got locked away in that human body of yours.
Good luck on your squeaky journey and happy tree-hopping!