Quite frequently life is unfair..

Incomprehensible/unlucky stuff comes upon our path, kick after kick after kick in the ass, and-....we got to take on it..one way or another we got to make our try to not sink on the faces of the problem...on the faces of our feelings and emotions. That's what it is generally expected and yeah, we should try to run under that ideal but-...it normally does not work a simple as that...to grief in complete pain is a rightful choice to take, cry or being mad against the life or-..the anything you feel like to, should be all right, there is no objective purpose to pretend that we're stone walls that are able to take the whatever ahead on us and come out always victorious and unscratched, we're made of simple meat at the end..

Once I heard "The more vulnerable we are, the more honest we are about ourselves, the stronger we become as persons"...I'mmmmm...still debating myself of how truth it all that advice can be, clearly you got to be careful to choose the proper places to be all open and sincere, but also-...it will be truth and important to practice that sense of sincerity with our own selves...even in private, I mean, how often we live "under the mask" even after we're out of those scenarios which actually require it, for how long we pretend a life that does not really fit with us, even without our notice, we could be stuck playing a roll in full auto-mode. The same person which gave that advise also said "Remain conscious; stop, think about what leads you to do the next step, or the current activity you're doing..does it makes sense with yourself?, are you feeling ok with it? are you actively conscious of the -for what- behind your performance?"

When do we leave our noodles behind? When is that moment when we decide to give them the back, that -they- and -us- are...independent elements. That what it does affect "them" has not much to do with "us"...WELL, as I exposed in the last paragraph..it is not a conscious/exact moment, we simply..stop noticing, we kept going in automatic with "our" thing, when that part still required care, when that part still required affection...a big hug from us....when you-...stop and think..we all can be...perceived as lost childs due to our mistakes...due to the paths we have choose..
Once we notice that failure from our side...what comes next?? Blaming??, coming hard on ourselves by not being constantly and actively conscious of every single action we perform. NO, oh god!, definitely no! That part...and surprisingly enough, OURSELVES have been isolated for quite too much, hard feelings and regrets should have not a welcome ticket for this reunion.....tears are welcome, an "I'm sorry" is welcome[Important: the -I'm sorry- that always counts, it the one which goes out of us, to our own person, we're not trying to sympathize anyone during an extremely personnel process like this I "try" to describe], but only one, when you say it, mean it, and it might be enough, THEN the actions might prove your honesty, and-..well, not sure if you know already but, the honest man, the one who is whole and accepts all the contrast of it's person is the stronger one.

THEN AGAIN! I'd be a completely dumbass to...suggest or...give away this speech, and....again, as at the beginning of all this...pretend life in general will work like a -sand box- and put this ideals on practice and-...live happily ever after wasting some of your valuable day active minutes reading my "enlightening" speech. When we are....down to the hole how we can put on motion this ideas, when precisely being here at the bottom make us feel tired, utterly weak for anything..................................as corny as it has to go...the answer to put in motion all...is love. Ok, ok, ok just listen! Not the -love- as we generally understand it(well that one also, but eventually..) The love I am talking...is the one which births and beats for ourselves alone; first goes the reconciliation with our person, the ones who we are, the one we could not completely accept as an integral part of the -I-, and the acceptation process is long and tricky too! Strictly personnel; make sure to be gentle, make sure to not blame, not criticize in this crucial moment in any direction , pure gentleness, pure love here. Next; we can opt for several valid external helps; the typical, that family member, that particular friend you have the trust to talk about this....don't feel weird to say on loud "I need your help, I do not feel right". We all are not always that blessed to have someone -that- close, look out for books, look out for podcast; PLEASE have my faith, that there is plenty of good people outside, which honestly and sincerely wants to give a helping hand with no mayor purpose behind that only doing so. You wanna go further in help, go for therapy; one time I was extremely ill from the stomach, like, I could not be on feet, my head was constantly spinning, BUT I did not wanted to go to the doctor, my father was taking care of me on that chance, constantly insisting that I should go to the doctor, that the case didn't seem like a one day infection, but I was completely hesitant to go. At 4...maybe 5 pm...shivering I was trying to get out of the bed, getting my shoes on, while I was telling to my dad; "The most important part of going to the doctor, is not the professional attention...or even the pills and medicine they can give you on their own(ok, maybe they are quite relevant indeed but-..) what most matters of going, is that...the mere act pf going, that you're saying without pronouncing a single word -I do care for myself-"

Emmet Underwood and Marcus Bradley O'Sullivan are and intellectual property of  BosonicVinegar and this whole piece was inspired from his own original short story named >Sanctuary< which totally worths your time to check it out!

[Thanks for reading...]

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Something might always be wrong with us...that's natural, do not be ashamed of it, do not apologize because of that mere fact of nature and life in general; just do not give up, do not stay still, do not let your self abandon..there is so much to do, there is so much love awaiting for us -outside-, get on feet, and get out of that wicked "sanctuary" you've been left on..put those human necessities on motion, they might take you to a better place..