I made this as a gift to my gf  Fenrir_Ragnarok for our first year anniversary together. It features our past sonas together and an endless spiral road symbolizing the path it took us to where we are now.

It was 14 years ago that I found her and she became my best friend, 8 years ago that I thought I lost her and a year ago that we found each other again. Coming to the conclusion of loving her in that 7 year gap wasnt easy, I reject love from others most of my life, afraid to be hurt by them, but mostly I feared abandonment. The trauma left by my mother neglect and my father leaving me behind was too strong. Loving someone meant losing them eventually, so for me it was easier to not grow attachments to anyone. But my gf was different, through that 7 year gap I tried endlessly to forget her, but I just couldnt.

Her parents sent her away 8 years ago far from me, they thought I was a bad influence or maybe they feared her daughter would become a lesbian as her own father original wife had cheated on her father with another woman. Destiny said nah, grow apart you both, and it hurt like hell, but I used that time to mature, process my own feelings and grow.

I dont know when it happened, but I figured it wasnt normal to miss and want someone so badly for 7 years, and I stopped fighting it. Just as I also accepted being a woman. Then I started appreciating what she did for me in the past and consequently also accepting my image.

I never thought I had end up liking another woman because I was at war with my own femininity, but now I can say I love being a woman and I love loving another woman. Stopping the self hate road was hard, but I can feel like I have gotten out of that hole. Its easier to appreciate myself and others a lot more now. My anger is tame now, I feel like I have grown to be a better person. Maybe I am just getting older and more chill.