and a number three.
Category Poetry / All
Species Unspecified / Any
Size 50 x 50px
File Size 444 B
Your words are well chosen, but I think you can get a lot more impact and oomph if you work on rhythm and metre. For example, the first coupld of lines, until "A silent sunset tear" are in fairly good rhythm, and it's easy to read. After that, it get sa little more difficult and clunky.
Still, I think with a little refinment, you could be a very excellent poet.
Still, I think with a little refinment, you could be a very excellent poet.
FA+

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